Dislcaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing

Her thoughts raced in the silences as she trotted down the darkened hallway. Fear watched her from the shadows. She couldn't shake the anxious feeling, in spite of knowing the irrationality of it. Suddenly she felt the life within her move. She froze, placing her hand on her belly and closing her eyes, as she tried to make out which limbs were pushing out and across her, just above her navel. She sighed, happily for a moment, before remembering the truth of her situation.

She was alone in life. She had a child with no father. There was a man she loved, who was ashamed of himself for somehow failing her, and a sense that she, defiled by her own weakness and foolishness, could never, again, be worthy of his affections.

She was startled when a strong dark hand traced down her arm and rested over her own fingers, feeling the movement of her unborn child. "You would choose the baby," Heero whispered in a dark tone. Not accusingly. Almost—admiration. "You're stubborn," he tacked on, for sincerity.

She sighed, looking up at him. "I couldn't make the call, so I waited. I knew I would run out of time, but I—I think I wanted to."

"Do you have a name?"

"No." She sighed. "I'm sure he'll tell me when he's ready." She moved her hands in small circles over where the lump had been.

A smiled tugged at his lips. "You need rest," he said.

Relena nodded and allowed him to escort her into her room. She looked at the disheveled bed for several seconds, before walking toward the bathroom. "I need a shower," she said, without turning back. She didn't want him to see the turmoil in her eyes. The irrationality of her pain.

"Hn," was the only response from a man she couldn't look at.

Relena locked the door, sinking to the tile floor beneath her. She felt sick at the thought of him touching her. Not because it was him, but because it was her. After what had happened. After what that man had done. After what she didn't stop. She could have tried harder. She could have stopped it, before it was too late. She hated herself for it. Why did she let this happen? Why allow Heero this burden? She was not worth his pain.

Relena made her way over to the shower. She turned on the hot water, stripping off her clothes. The room became clouded with steam. She knew Sally wouldn't permit such heat, but she had to get clean.

Heero watched the steam escape under the bathroom door, as his eyes began mechanically scanning the room. He'd been trained in psychological behavior patterns, and recognized her strange obsession to get clean, as well as the compulsions that were hurting her. It had only been a few months. Maybe she could recover her rationality in the area, soon. Either way, he would see to it that she got counseling after this trip.

He realized he'd been staring blankly at the bed. Clean sheets would do her good. He began tearing away the sweat-drenched layers, preparing her a safe place to rest for the night. When he'd completed the task, he moved to the dresser, setting out clothing for her to wear after the shower. He reached for a towel in her closet, but froze when there was a knock at the door.

"Come."

Quatre stepped in, followed by Zechs. Zechs was stiffer, more so than usual. His eyes met no one. Quatre stayed near the exit, still wary of Heero's emotions.

"How is she?" Quatre said.

"Hn," he replied, turning from the two blond men. "She's showering."

Quatre nodded, slowly and expressively, approaching the bathroom. "Lee? It's too hot in there. I can see the steam."

He received no verbal response, but smiled when he heard the water pressure adjust. She'd turned down the hot water.

Zechs looked at the mattress. "You made the bed?"

Heero just looked at him, giving no answer.

"Is she—okay?"

Heero leaned back against the wall, closing his eyes.

Zechs shook his head. "Well—I just wanted to know she's in good hands."

Heero's gaze shot back up to him. His face showed no emotion, pleasant or otherwise.

"You know where to find me if you need me," Relena's brother said before stepping out.

Quatre eyed Heero. "I don't think it's hit him, yet."

"It will," he responded.

"You okay?"

The dark haired pilot looked away, trying to disguise his feelings.

"I'm sorry."

"You did the right thing. You protected her."

"But I lied to you."

Heero was silent for a moment. "You protected her," he said, again.

Quatre accepted the finality of the statement. He put his hand on the other pilot's shoulder to show support. "Take care of her," he said before leaving the room. It wasn't a necessary statement, but Quatre always felt the need to see that he was understood by his friends.

When Relena shut off the water, Heero walked closer to the door. "I have clothes for you," he called out.

Relena cracked it only slightly to grab the bundle he was offering. "Thank you," she whispered in an embarrassed voice.

Once she was covered in the soft cotton, she stepped out. She was pleasantly surprised at the fresh linens that awaited her. "Heero."

He gave her a small, sad smile. "Lie down and get some rest," he said, turning it down.

"Quatre's been staying in your usual room, but there's another one available down the hall if you—"

"I'm not leaving you," he said.

Relena blushed. "That's fine."

"I'll sleep on the floor."

"What? No."

He looked at her, incredulously.

"You may stay in the same bed as me, if you wish. You can't sleep on the floor."

He was silent.

"Either you sleep in bed with me, or in your own room. You will not be kept on the floor, like a dog. That's final."

Heero turned and switched off the light. "I'll sleep on the floor," he said, again. He was determined.

Relena sighed, making herself comfortable in her large, empty bed.

:::

Hours later in the night, Heero was awakened by the sounds of Relena crying out, again. She was tossing and turning her body, fighting back at the shadow. Her eyes were still squeezed shut. Heero climbed into the bed, beside her, taking her into his arms. His embrace seemed to have made her feel safe. Her body stilled in his grip. He couldn't bring himself to let go.