With Her and Without Bending

by tmntfan4eva

Tahno has lost his bending and the rest of the krew are moving to the island. When things become too stressful, Korra ventures out to the city. Could a chance encounter with Tahno change everything? And if it does, will the others ever be able to accept him after the things he's done? Or will he be lost in a sea of darkness with Korra as his only light?

4. Memories

Another one. This one might be my favorite so far. I don't know, some parts make it hard to choose. And wow, this one is pretty longer. It's even longer than the last one. I hope it doesn't bother anyone. If it does you can say so and I'll try to shorten the coming ones. Well, enjoy!

Another couple of weeks passed. They tangled with Amon a few times, but nothing came from it. Each time she got flashes of the past. Still, it meant little and afterward she could barely recall them. She wondered what it all meant. Surely it was connected to her situation somehow. Perhaps the man she vaguely remembered being the bad guy in the past was a person Amon knew, or Amon himself.

She mused over it all almost constantly. The only time she got a break was when she slept or when she messed around with Bolin, Tahno, Mako, and occasionally Asami. She was living here now too. That was something else big that had happened over the weeks. Her father was on the Equalist side. Yeah…it was pretty big. Their house was full now too. She wasn't sure they could take another addition. Luckily, she didn't care about anyone else that might want to crash there. At least…that's what she thought.

Today was one of the days that Tahno decided to stop by. He didn't go up to the house, he wasn't in the mood. He stayed closer to the ocean, lying back on the soft grass. He propped his head up with his hands, his arms forming a kind of wing appearance, his head being the body. He breathed softly in and out, letting the scent of the ocean fill his lungs. Without his bending this was the closest he could get to his element. Except…

He blushed deeply. There was always the things that Korra tried to do to help him. It was mostly pointless, but at the same time it helped. It didn't really make him feel one with his element, but it did make him feel one with her. Just a couple of days she'd slipped behind him and locked her fingers with his before she began bending. Their movements were exactly the same and for a fleeting moment he was given overwhelming happiness.

Unfortunately that emotion faded. However he was not too upset. After all, he still had her right there. She was so close he could feel her breath on his neck and her heart beating on his back. So he did not cry. He didn't come close. He even smiled back at her. Only it wasn't because of what she thought. She was still pretty oblivious. They were only friends. Friends.

He frowned deeply as he lay motionless. It had only been about a month since they'd connected, so he couldn't really complain. Honestly he was the one that didn't make sense. It shouldn't be possible to fall in love so quickly. He was insane. He sighed heavily. Then again, considering his past, it was not so incredible. All he wanted was love. And she was the first to show him anything resembling it. Her…his enemy.

A sound came from behind him, but he barely stirred. He continued to stare intently at the sky. It was incredibly clear today. It was the exact opposite of his mind. He was so conflicted right now. He was going to ask her something today. It had nothing to do with his feelings, god no, but it still troubled him. He feared what she might say, especially considering recent events. He was honestly amazed he was this calm looking right now, the way he was waging a war within himself.

"Tahno?" He knew it. Her voice came clear to him. It was a bit confused and a little more than skeptical. Not skeptical of him, just of what exactly he was doing. "What are you doing way out here?" She plopped down next to him without hesitation, her bright blue eyes piercing him.

Tahno glanced at her briefly, but quickly looked the opposite direction. "I didn't feel like having my life threatened again, thank you very much." He came off vaguely cold, but it wasn't directed at her. After the past few weeks he knew she'd understand. While Mako hadn't physically harmed him since the first day, the threats never died. If anything they got progressively worse.

Korra sighed softly, but the light in her eyes never went away. "Come on, it's not that bad." It was. She never witnessed the threatening, but she always heard about it from someone. Whether it was Tahno himself, Bolin, or even Ikki, she eventually heard it.

Tahno snorted loudly, a bit of amusement showing. "Don't be so naïve." He loved that about her. She always tried to make things smaller than they were, to insist things would be alright tomorrow. "It's horrible." He sat up suddenly, at eye level with her. "Do you know what he says?" He asked in all seriousness.

She dropped her gaze, frowning. "Mostly." She murmured.

"Even knowing it isn't the same." He shook his head. "No. It's completely in person. You wouldn't believe how harsh he can sound, or how evil. He may sound well meaning and sweet to you, but there's a whole different him when he's got me cornered."

Korra felt chilled by the thought. "Look, I'm sorry." She said sadly. "Really. But there's only so much I can do." He looked back up at him. "I'm not his mother or anything."

Tahno smiled faintly. "I don't expect you too. I just want you to understand he's not always what you think he is." Of course he was pretty sure she was capable of kicking the bending boy's ass. However he knew following him around was not ideal. Tahno was eighteen after all. He should be able to take care of himself.

So that's the only reason?" She looked curiously at him. "You just don't want to be around Mako?" It wasn't that she blamed him, Mako could be a handful. Still, she figured seeing her was more important that avoiding Mako.

"No." He shook his head. "I also wanted to be near the ocean." He stared wistfully out at it. "It makes me feel good. And it helps me think."He had a lot to think about today too. He almost wished she hadn't come he desired to think so much.

"Think? About what?" Naturally she asked. He was not surprised. He'd learned quickly how inquisitive she was capable of being. It was almost as ingrained in her as water bending was.

He sighed. "A lot of things." He still wasn't sure about this. Should he ask? He didn't know. She'd said just the other day that there were too many people here.

Korra squinted at the side of his face visible. "Tell me." She urged, letting her hand fall down on top of his. "Maybe I can help." A broad grin spread across her face.

He looked tentatively over at her. "Korra…I hate leaving here." He admitted. "Every time I leave I fall a little farther." It sounded exaggerated, but it was by no means so. Something in him was always lifted when he stepped foot on the island and even more so when he sees her face. "I…I just…" Just the same, that part as well as a bit more of him dies when he leaves, especially when he knows what he's returning to.

Korra's expression lost its shine and her eyes grew puzzled. "Tahno? What's wrong?" She squeezed his hand. His face was starting to look like it had the day he broke down. She didn't want that again. But she didn't know which way to go to prevent it. There were two paths – letting this go or pressing for information. Tahno could be hard to decipher, so she wasn't sure about herself. It was different from Mako and Bolin.

That was it. He couldn't resist that sad face. While he knew the truth would undoubtedly make her sadder, which he hated, in the end it would be better as a whole. Who knows? Maybe she'd say yes. So he took a deep breath and answered, "Korra…I can't keep doing this." His voice shook faintly. "I can't go back. I…I want to stay here." He turned his head and stared her straight in the eyes.

Korra stared right back. She tried her hardest to see into him and understand without him having to spell it out. Again he was incredibly hard to understand. With Mako and Bolin it was obvious – their home was destroyed. Asami – her father was evil. But Tahno…she didn't know. "Why?" She finally forced out, sounding smooth despite her uncertainties. "Don't you have a home?"

Tahno grimaced and his eyes took on a new level of pain. "Home?" He scoffed, laughing with more hate than amusement. "I never had a home." To him a home was a place where people loved you. Everyone he knew as a child talked about it – their parents kissing them good night and congratulating them for something as simple as learning a new word. It was something he never had.

Korra's eyes widened considerably. "What?" She spit out in utter disbelief. "You don't have a place to live? But you…you're rich!" She had never looked more shocked. "I mean, you won the championship for four years!"

Tahno glowered at how shallow her reasoning was. It reminded him of the day at the arena. Now though it made him almost want to laugh. Yes, his fans. But this, it was too soon to laugh. It simply stung. "Don't be stupid." He growled. "Of course I have a house." He broke their gaze and shoved his head into the air.

"But…" Tahno's movement made a scowl flicker across her face, but at the same time she smiled. It reminded her of the old him. He always did that back then. It made her feel he was getting better, slowly but surely. "You just said…"

Tahno rolled his eyes. She didn't understand the difference. Of course not. He was sure her life had been just dandy, being the Avatar and all. Even if her parents hadn't wanted her, they no doubt couldn't help but feel pride at producing such a prodigy. Not that that was the case. The few times she'd talked about them, she'd talked with such love and devotion that he knew they loved her right. "Don't be stupid."

Her scowl came back and her smile slipped. "What?" Her voice was low. She even removed her hand from his.

He almost chuckled at how she was taking his words. "A house and home aren't the same." He informed her. He was interested in seeing what she thought about this. He lowered his head to better see.

"What?" She made a face at the notion. "Don't be ridiculous. Of course they are! It's where you live. A home is your house and a house is your home." She nodded firmly. A smug smirk came to her lips as she was sure she'd won.

A premature victory, he thought. "No. A home is a place where you're loved and appreciated. It's where you feel you belong and the place you would love to stay forever. A house is simply a place of shelter. It is void of love, like an empty shell. Actually, usually a house if full of hate. That or you're alone, the only one there."

The smugness was slapped from Korra's face. A different emotion took its place – a look of utter shock and scared realization. "What…what are you…?" She didn't know how to say it. From his words it seemed that he was inferring his home was a horrible place. But, could that really be? "Your parents…they can't really…" Could they really hate him?

Tahno smirked at her baffled face. It was a sad smirk nonetheless. "Afraid so dear Avatar." He was feeling rather detached in that moment and so used her old name. He still pronounced it funny. He was especially aware of this now after hearing it so often. "My parents were selfish bastards." He seethed through gritted teeth. His voice was brimming with utter hatred, all other feelings sapped dry.

"Tahno…" Korra felt a strangling sadness rise within her. It was so powerful she found it suddenly hard to breath. There were also faint traces of tears beginning to rise in her eyes. She'd never heard of such a thing and it rocked her to her very core. Well, of course she knew about it. It was just that she'd never actually witnessed a case of it. Tahno, he was the first.

Tahno snorted and looked away again. "It's nothing." He insisted, strong yet simultaneously aching over the truth. Now she knew. She knew his deepest darkest secret, the thing he had died to hide from everyone else in his life. Perhaps that was why they never really were in his life. They clung to the him he pretended to be. "It's just something that happened. It doesn't matter anymore."

All was silent for a moment. Then it was shattered. "It does!" She burst out. "It totally does!" She clenched her fists and shook faintly. He wondered if she was willing herself not to cry for him. "I mean…that's just awful! How can anyone hate their own children!" She shook her head fervently. "Those monsters!"

Tahno smiled sadly at her. "They never wanted a kid." He shrugged indifferently. "It's as simple as that."

Korra's heart was tugged at again. "But…that's not how it's supposed to go." She whined helplessly. She forced back more emotion than that. "Once you have a kid…you have to take care of them."

Tahno laughed out loud. "Oh, they took care of me." He assured. His amusement died quickly. His gaze hardened and fists clenched. "But that's as far as they went." He shook his head bitterly. "As long as I was alive, that's all that was necessary. And technically, they were right. I lived, they weren't arrested, everyone was-"

"NO!" She cut him off harshly.

Tahno jumped, not expecting her hateful tone. The words he'd been prepared to say died on his lips and he fell into utter silence. She became the leader once more.

"No! That's not all that matters!" She shook her head furiously. She swore an angry tear or two went flying in her rage, but she didn't care. "People like that shouldn't be allowed to live, let alone have children!" She seethed. "I mean – look what happens!" She inadvertently made a stab at him.

Tahno's eyes narrowed, hurt lurking just beneath the surface. "What does that mean?" He growled stiffly. She had just dug herself a hole a mile deep. He actually felt himself getting angry with her for the first time.

Korra realized her mistake, but it was too late to stop. "They turned you into an arrogant ass just like them!" She stared up into his furious eyes undeterred. "I mean, look at how you treated me when we first met! You tried to seduce me like some creeper." The longer she ranted the less angry her words sounded. She was slowly cooling. "And the way you cheated. That was just a part of your complex too. If you had had parents who weren't stupid-"

"Stop." He growled coldly.

Korra became faintly frightened as she continued to look into his eyes. "Tahno, I'm sorry. But…you know it's true."

That was it. Tahno slammed his fist onto the ground before jumping up hastily. He didn't utter a word afterward. He simply turned on his heel and began walking away from her.

Korra started. She'd never seen him move so quickly and with such fury. "T-Tahno!" She called after him, hurrying to get up and follow. "Wait!" She was much faster than him and was soon within arm's reach of him. She took her chance and snatched at his wrist. "Please."

Tahno jerked his arm away immediately. "Don't touch me." In a way being so cold hurt him, but at the same time he was too furious with her to care. He could scarcely believe she'd said those things. Who cares if they were true? That just made it even worse to speak aloud. He kept walking.

"Tahno." She begged, following him. "Please. Don't go."

He stopped suddenly, looking at her from the corner of his narrowed eyes. "Why not?" He snapped. "Why should I stand here and be insulted?" He crossed his arms firmly over his chest and stared away from her. But he didn't move again. He remained frozen in place. Why? He shouldn't do it because she wanted him too. He didn't owe her it. Yet he was still nonetheless.

Korra stared sadly at him. She took a couple of steps closer so that she was just in front of him and could easily read his expression. It was more hurt than anything at this point. She felt so guilty. "Tahno…" She touched her hand to his face. "I won't lie. I hated you." His gaze hardened further. She quickly went on before he could pull away. "But…that isn't you anymore. You've changed." She stepped tentatively forward and let her hand fall down to his shoulder.

His expressions shifted, but only slightly. He refused to give in so easily. She was wrong. That was still him. That was him with bending. Surely he'd become that again if he ever got his bending back. Nothing would change that. He was naturally drawn to attention. It was an effect of his childhood.

Korra laid her other hand on his shoulder. She took another step and sweetly laid her head against his chest. "You're who you always should have been." She whispered, letting her hands slip toward his back and lock around him in a hug. The hug made her whole body press against him too, but she didn't pull away in embarrassment. She wanted to show him how sorry she was.

Tahno shuddered and breathed out in a mixture of pleasure and disappointment. He was so happy to have her so close, yet he couldn't believe something as simple as her touch made him fold like this. He was pathetic. He felt even more pathetic as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm sorry." She breathed. "About what happened to you, and about being so blunt. I…wasn't thinking." She hugged him a bit tighter.

"It's fine." He half lied. She made it ok, but it would ultimately always hurt. That's why he didn't want to go back anymore. It only made it hurt even more.

It was silent for what felt like forever. They stayed that way, in each other's arms. Finally it was Korra that broke the blissful silence. "Tahno…?"

"Hm?" He perked, nearly having dozed off.

"I don't want to make you talk about it…but how bad was it?" Her fists clenched his shirt in anticipation of his reaction.

Surprisingly he did not explode. He even smiled, although she did not see it from her position. "Worse than you could ever imagine."

She hesitated. He had answered her, but she didn't know if that was as much as he was willing to give. Still, her curiosity was too much for her. She had to say it, "Tell me."

The next thing they knew they had fallen back into the past. Tahno surprisingly delved deep. He began at the beginning, when it was smaller. He was four. He had been playing outside alone – again. Sure there were other rich kids that his parents approved of, but he was a bit strange. He preferred playing alone a lot, especially after it rained. He didn't know why at that point, but he soon found out.

He was splashing around in the puddles from the storm. He had his yellow raincoat and jacket on and was getting extremely muddy. His mother would hate that too. Then, as he whipped his arm out to catch himself from falling, one of the puddles leapt to life.

He started, eyes bulging from his head, and missed catching himself. He did a face plow in the puddle and came up spluttering. He shook his head fervently and blinked repeatedly at the puddle. He didn't move for a whole minute, an amazing feat for a four year old. Then a bright smile stretched across his face.

He jumped to his feet and took on a childish fighting stance. Then he jerked his arm again. The water leapt to life just like before. It went flying across his view and landed in another patch of water. This made his smile stretch even further. He laughed in utter delight and clapped.

Even the clapping motion made the water stir faintly. Of course, he didn't notice such a small thing. He was too amazed by the bigger movement he had achieved. Unfortunately he had not yet learned the truth about his parents, and the first thing he did was run for them. "Mother! Father!" He had been told countless times however to refer to them as mother and father, not mommy and daddy. So by now he acted this out perfectly.

His mother and father had been sitting listlessly in the house, not affected at all by the other's company. Then they heard him calling. "Oh, great." She sighed, letting her head slip farther into her hand. "Here he comes again." There wasn't a hint of affection in her tone. Nothing but annoyance lurked there.

His father was no better. He growled low in his throat, but there was at least a tiny spark in his eyes. At times he found himself amused by the child and his antics. He wondered if now would be the same. "Wonder what he wants?" He grunted.

"God knows." She bit back. "But out there playing, he's probably filthy." She hated having to give him baths so much. She was only happy as he drifted off to sleep and she could pretend he didn't exist. Although deep down she did enjoy one thing about him, really and truly. She loved being able to sing to him as he went to bed because she'd always wanted to be a singer and never got the chance. Her husband certainly didn't approve, not even in leisure. So Tahno was a nice excuse. And in those moments she almost loved him, almost.

Tahno came flying around the corner, mud going everywhere. There was a messy trail behind him too. He was going to get it, although he didn't know it would have nothing to do with the obvious. "Mother!" He halted suddenly, nearly flying forward onto his face from the change in speed. The close call only made him more eager. It pumped him with a adrenaline. "Look what I can do!"

She held in a sigh. "What is it?" She supposed he learned some sort of acrobatic move. He hung around kids that did that kind of thing. She was not expecting what she got.

He backed up a couple of steps and breathed in deeply. He swayed his hands and gathered up some of the mud on his jacket. He figured that it was similar enough to water, and he was right. It moved with him, obeying like a faithful pet.

His mother and father would have dropped something if they had been holding anything. They were that stunned. Their eyes were wider than ever and a strangling fear crept up on them. They almost felt unable to breath.

Tahno looked on eagerly, waiting to hear some amazement. He never thought for an instant that he would get the exact opposite. He'd never seen something so amazing. So it stood to reason they wouldn't have either.

His mother finally snapped out of it. She jerked forward, snapped her arm out, and gripped furiously onto the collar of his shirt. She forced him forward in a hurtful way, inches from her face. "What do you think you're doing!" She roared. "You're not to do that! Not now! Not ever!"

Tahno cringed and shied away. She was really mad this time. Even he as a four year old could tell. Spit rarely flew from her mouth like now. He didn't dare fight her though. He knew better than that too.

"Look at me!" She demanded, shaking him.

He whined softly, doing as she asked. His wide, scared eyes stared directly into her furious ones.

"That's the devil's magic!" She shrieked. The way she worded it made it sound religious, but it wasn't. She had her reasons for hating it, those which were partially rooted in her own parents' hate of it. Sadly it was water that she detested most too. "So don't you dare do it again! Or I swear you'll be sorry! You hear me! Huh!"

Tahno nodded stiffly, too frightened to react like any normal child would. Only after she released him did he break. He ran out of the room like a petrified puppy and the tears streamed down his face. They blinded him and caused him to trip and fall. The pain made him cry harder. He didn't understand. He thought they'd love it. He thought they'd love him. But no. It was the first real sign that they did not harbor love. His mother's songs were nothing more than comforting lies.

He pounded his tiny fists on the ground in anguish. He sobbed heavily. If only he could understand them. Or perhaps he could make them see that his strange skill was amazing. Then maybe he wouldn't hurt half as much as in this moment. His neck was still sore. But the emotional torment was even worse. He couldn't imagine worse pains. But he was only four, he did not see clearly.

Soon he would see that it was worse than he thought. Little things would set them off, things that hadn't before. The revelation of him being a water bender was too much for them. They hated him even more now. Whether it was due to envy or some horrible past, he never would know. But he liked to pretend that it was envy. Everyone envied him. That was the only way to cope.

The next moment he recalled to her was when he was seven. He'd been out on his own, almost like an orphan, only worse. He wore clothes that were too fancy to be mistaken for a street rat and the group he should have called family did not love him. At least those on the streets were close and cared about each other. He almost wished he were one of them this way. But he never went that far. Instead he coped by belittling them. He went a little farther every time. The severity rose with the severity of his parents treatment of them. So this time it was horrible.

He mocked them for their apparel and their dirt ridden faces. He even laughed at their lack of parents. They of course didn't know he didn't really have parents either, so they reacted poorly. They attacked him and easily overtook him. His bending was pretty skilled, but against a group he didn't stand a chance. And in the end he was bloody and bruised and they were the ones laughing.

He made sure not to go home looking that way and stopped by the fountain. He cleaned himself up as best he could, but the evidence was still there. So when he walked through the door his mother quickly realized where he'd been and what he'd been doing. "Again!" She snarled, barely holding back her quivering fists. "You tried to fight those boys again, didn't you! You used bending!"

"I had to!" He yelled back. By her tone he sometimes thought she loved them more than her. It was as if she sought to protect them from him. "I couldn't just let them beat me up!"Really they didn't need it anyway. They always got the better of him. He just never learned. Or, more so, he refused to learn. It was an excuse to use him bending – for protection. It was like his mother's singing.

His mother shook with fury. "I don't care! They can kill you for all I care! But you don't ever use bending to fight back!" She lashed out and smacked him across the face. "Got it!"

Tahno hadn't been expecting her blow and was sent flying backwards. He fell back into the wall and groaned softly. "I can do what I want." He hissed softly.

His mother's head snapped up. "What! What was that!" She dared him to say it again. She didn't need repeating. She had ears like a super human.

"I said I can do whatever the hell I want!" He yelled with newfound confidence. He pushed himself up off the wall and pushed the stinging pain from the slap away. "It's my power! My body! My life! You can't make me do shit!"

His mother's eyes caught fire. She zoomed in on him and didn't think – she struck out. There was that all too familiar sick satisfaction from the contact when her nails broke the skin on his cheek. She felt the blood as it caught on her nails and it made her shiver within.

Tahno jerked back to the wall, a small cry escaping his lips as she drew blood. He may act tough, but he was still only seven. He needed love and affection just as much as any other kid and he could not help but feel hurt both physically and emotionally every time his mother struck him.

She wasn't about to stop. She snatched his wrist and jerked him forward. Her grip was intense, especially for a woman. She knew with the amount of strength she was putting into it he would surely have a bruise come morning. As much as she hated it, she'd have to heal him as he slept to hide the evidence as well as the fact she used her water bending. She was a lot of things, but she refused to be looked at as a hypocrite.

Tahno cried out louder. He might have begged for her to stop, but the part of him that believed in her good intentions had died long ago. Now he knew it would only make her attacks more severe. Honestly his cries were condemning him as well. He just couldn't help it.

"Now answer me." She hissed venomously in a slick tone that he would one day adopt for himself. "You won't ever fight them again, will you?" She dug her nails into his wrist for good measure.

He whimpered. "N-No…" He promised vainly. It was an empty promise, only given to stop the attacks. Tomorrow he'd be right back at it. These feelings she gave him were to blame. In order to remain sane he had to fight. Otherwise, he might just kill himself.

She knew it was empty, just as much as her love for him. So she made one last act against him. She slung him mercilessly into the stair railing. This would become one of her trademark abuse moves just like the scar on his head would forever remain as proof. Not even his mother had the power to heal such a deep and constant wound.

He slammed into it, somehow managing to hold in a scream. He felt his head split and the blood seep out. It tainted his black hair and gave it a strange chill inducing color. But that was the least of his worries. His problem surviving her rage – today and every day afterward. He then slumped down to the ground, his head hanging almost limply.

The first time he'd pulled this she'd felt real fear for him for the first time. But now there wasn't even a stir. She stared dully at his figure. "You better not do it again." She growled, kicking him for extra measure. Then she turned swiftly on her heel and left him. He'd get up the moment she was out of sight. If not and he truly was in danger, then she could always find some way to pretend he died naturally.

Just as she knew he would, he moved again. He stirred slowly, moaning softly in agony. He lifted a trembling hand to the back of his head. He felt the slick texture and his assumptions were confirmed. She'd thrown him rough, that was for sure. Then all of a sudden he was crying.

He buried his head in his hands despite the blood. He didn't care. He needed to hide his shame. He felt he should have steeled himself enough not to cry like a baby. But every time he still cried. It was like a routine, it was ingrained in him. Moments after she disappeared, no matter what, he would burst into tears. He was getting better at keeping them silent, but they always came. They mixed with the blood and smeared it down his face. He felt so weak.

This was one of the moments where a part of himself was lost. Every year another part died and was replaced with something toxic that his mother and father tainted him with. This time it was his ability to sympathize. This was so because he no longer wanted to feel, not anything. If he didn't even want to feel, how was he supposed to feel for others? It was not possible.

He told her of many other moments following that one and some before it, all of which were extremely painful. There were even points where he thought he might cry. As steeled as he was to the mistreatment, he couldn't help himself. No one wanted to relive moments where they were hated, especially not by their parents. He was no different. He was human too.

She saw how upset he was getting the deeper into his life he went and almost told him to stop. Instead they started slipping down to the ground. Story after story they found themselves in a different position. By the time he reached his final tale, he was laying on his back and had his head in her lap with her playing with his hair.

She ran her fingers affectionately through his still messy hair. Even after a month he hadn't begun to care about the way he looked. He truly had changed. But honestly she found herself liking it better this way. As much as it hurt to be reminded of the pain he was going through, his new style made him, dare she say…attractive?

Tahno had his eyes closed at this point. His breathing was soft and steady. He was able to keep this calm because of her touch. He had made the risky move of laying his head on her a couple of stories ago and was amazed when she brought his head down into her lap. More than that, he was thrilled. Now with her soothing him, he was not about to break down. He could finish with a much more relaxed appearance.

Korra had done this specifically because he looked so upset. She hated to see him this way, but wanted to know about him. So she did the only logical thing. "Then what?" She breathed. She was entranced by him.

Again they went back in time. Now it was right after the probending match. The arena was destroyed and three players had been stripped of their bending. Tahno was one of them. He didn't know what to do with himself. He was a wreck.

He remembered it well. She and the other two brothers had noticed him getting out of the water and had saw fit to mock him. She stood up for him and for a moment he felt a flutter of happiness. But it quickly died.

As he walked to his house he knew that his life was going to come crashing down more so than it already had. At this point his parents had accepted his ability, but only because it made them filthy sticking rich. He knew that otherwise they'd hate it and him more than ever, just like when he was a kid. So this was certainly going to be…interesting.

He was home in about thirty minutes, his eyes red from crying and his expression exhausted as if he had done battle with the world. He might as well have. Bending was his world. And now it was gone. He raised a shaky hand to the doorknob and grasped it weakly. He didn't know if he could do this.

Suddenly the door slammed open. It nearly knocked Tahno down except he managed to jump back just in time. In the open doorway stood his mother. Her eyes burned furiously. She practically put off fire. Surely she would have been if that were her element.

The sight of her made him shudder. He hadn't felt such fear since he was a child. He had always had his bending to protect him, but now he only had pure physical strength. And in his depressed state he was not confident that could save him. She looked so angry. It was like when he was four, only ten times worse.

His mother didn't say a word. The first thing she did was lash out and smack him clear across the face. A flicker of sick, positive emotion went by her face at the contact. She enjoyed the burning it caused her as well as him.

Tahno moved with her blow. He was not fast enough to dodge. Right now he would be amazed if he could dodge a snail. It stung like nothing else. He felt the imprint as if it were a fossil on his face. But he didn't dare raise him hand to touch it. That would be weakness. His mother detested weakness.

When he didn't react her anger level soared. She snatched his arm and dug her nails deep into his skin. She went for blood. As she dug deep she jerked him into the house and slammed the door behind her. She soon felt the sickeningly sweet feel of his blood. It had been years. The last time she remembered it was when he was ten. He had still been weak then. But after that…she was no match.

Tahno cringed faintly. He remembered his mother's power. As frail as she appeared, she had a lot of strength behind her. He could only pray his father would not enter this. He didn't even move a muscle to fight. He was pathetic.

His mother smirked darkly at him before she slung him toward the stair railing. It was a merciless toss and she intended to elicit more blood and perhaps a scream.

Tahno did not scream. He didn't have enough feeling within him to. He simply cringed faintly. There was no blood this time. As much as he remembered the feeling from the countless times she'd tossed him into him, it was definitely different. It made a sound, but nothing more. Then he slumped to the ground.

It was startling how similar this fight was to the time back when he was seven. It was almost scary. Still, there was no blood on his head. Better still he was older. If he wanted to he could beat her senseless. But he didn't. As much as he hated her he didn't feel right attacking her in this moment. He deserved all this this time around. He'd failed in the worst way.

His mother finally spoke, screaming, "You disgrace!" She slammed her fist into a wall. "You worthless sorry excuse for a son!" She shook incredibly. He wondered if she was fighting her need to go after him. He wondered if a part of her had come to love him a little, enough to hold back. "You couldn't even probend right! You had to go and lose it all! You-You-" A high pitched scream followed her words.

Tahno simply stared dully up at her. She was on the brink of losing her mind. She had invested all of her hope into his abilities. No, not him. She only wished to get rich with his skill. That was why she was so furious. If he had died it would have been the same. She would have only cried for his skill.

"I hate you!" There, she finally said it. She'd not said it since he was born, not outright. But she finally said it. "All you do is let me fall! First with you stupid water bending! And now, when I just started to love it, you go and lose it!" She groaned in utter aggravation and threw her hands into the air.

He smiled to himself in hurt amusement. Yes, she would say it that way. She hated him for the ability in the first place, yet she didn't love him when he found a use for it that she approved of. Her love for his ability was all that changed. "You selfish bitch." He hissed.

She swirled her head around. Her eyes were wild and crazy. "What?" She spat.

"How do you think I feel!" He snarled, a faint spark of life coming to his eyes with his rage. "Bending was a part of me! It wasn't just a way to make big bucks, you greedy prick! It was who I was! Do you understand that! It's like your singing! What would you do if you couldn't do it!" He saw her start to protest, but he stopped her. "And I don't mean dad not letting you! I mean you are physically incapable of doing it!"

She was silent for a brief moment. She almost agreed with him. But the part of her that hated his guts quickly took control. "It's not even close to the same!" She screamed. She leapt forward and kicked him hard in the stomach.

He groaned loudly and rolled over. "You know you'd rather die." He growled weakly as he propped himself up on an elbow. "You can't lie to me mother dearest." He sneered, the endearing words coming out as a curse instead of a sweet nickname. "Besides, even you know you fear this. Not as much as singing. But you know it, you tremble at losing your bending. As much as you hate it, it's a part of you too."

She started. The anger vanished and her face whitened. No…how did he know? When could he have found out? She had always been so careful. She didn't understand. No…no!

He smirked triumphantly. She never knew he knew. But he'd came to the conclusion around the age of nine or ten, just before he was able to overcome her. He'd put two and two together. His wounds would always disappear far too quickly and every so often he swore he saw her steal away from his room in the early hours of the night, leaving him with a comforting feeling. He also knew water benders were healers. So he finally saw her for what she was. But he saved the revelation for the perfect time, a time like this.

"W-What are you talking about!" She tried to recover. She knew she failed. His smile told all. It made her ears burn with embarrassment mixed with fury. "I'm not a bender! You're just the spawn of something illogical!" She pointed an accusing finger at him. "Your father and I – we're normal!"

Tahno chuckled coldly. "Normal?" He stood up. "Is that what you call it? It's normal to hit your own flesh and blood? Normal to make him cry every day of his life? Normal to make him wish he was dead? Normal to only do enough to keep him alive and you out of jail? Is that what normal is? Because then I don't ever want to be normal! I'd rather have five freaking heads than be what you call normal!"

His mother's anger flared. "You ingrate!" She screamed. She balled her hand into a tight fist and launched it at his face. He didn't move, and her blow landed right in his jaw. She then took both his wrists in her hands to prevent him from reacting, just in case he changed his mind on being so passive. "We could have abandoned you. We could have kicked you out on the streets!" She leaned in to his ear. "We could have killed you."

He shuddered as her breath tickled his skin. True. If they'd done it early on, it would've been easy for them to convince others that there never had been a child, or that he had died soon after birth. It happened. But they hadn't. Still…which was really worse – lying and killing, or letting live and murdering his soul?

"Remember that." She snarled in a low tone before jerking back. "And think about that the next time you accuse us of injustice." She released his hands and took a step back. "I may love money and hate you, but I loved you enough to let you live." She acted as if she was done, even turning to leave. Then at the last moment she jerked back to him and delivered another slap to his face. She glared heatedly at him for an instant. Then she was gone.

Tahno stared after her. He lifted a hand to his burning cheek. Was that really love? Just allowing a person to live, did that really mean anything? Or was that just proof of how much of a coward she really was? He didn't know. All he knew was that he suddenly felt weak in the knees. They trembled beneath him and he fell back against the wall.

An all too familiar feeling was surfacing again. He hadn't felt it for years, not long after he'd finally became stronger than her. But it was coming. It swelled within him. He took in deep shaky breaths to try and remain calm. Only he knew it was impossible. This feeling could not be quailed once it made itself known. He lifted his head and the back of it pressed against the wall. Maybe this would do something. No…of course not.

He closed his eyes tightly as a last resort. Then it spilled over. He felt silent tears well in his eyes and slip past the barrier of his eyes. After so many years of power and forcing them back, all the buildup finally hit him – and hard. He was even sobbing silently. He'd lost it all. He didn't just loose his bending. He'd lost his soul, his life, his money, and most importantly the false image of his mother's love. No longer could he pretend he had it. The illusion disappeared, right along with who he had struggled to be his whole life. He was who he would have been if his parents were really normal, only broken. His world ended – forever.

Only once he met Korra did it restart. His world started to begin anew, with the new him taking control. He no longer had to be the cocky, self-centered, attention grabbing boy. He could be himself – at least with her.

He ended the tales there. Not only was there no more room to expand, but he didn't think he could handle another of them. He felt his fists clench somewhere in the last story and he was sure that any more would have him wound up so tight he would be liable to snap. He didn't want to do that, not with Korra.

Korra saw that it was over. She too was happy. Tears were evident in her eyes and she was choking back all sorts of negative emotions. She didn't dare speak. She didn't know what might come out if she did. Screams? Sobs? It was safer to press her lips tightly together and hold back.

"My mother was miserable too you know." He said absently, a hint of anger mingled with pity. "She was mistreated for being a water bender, so she mistreated me." He'd learned that shortly after he returned from being stripped of his bending. He'd sought the information like a hungry animal seeks food. And he'd found it. "But my dad…" He trailed off. He was just cruel for no reason.

Korra grimaced. She removed a hand from his hair and ran it over his face. She hoped it would speak for her. She wanted him to know she was sorry without saying it.

He reached up and laid his hand on hers. He understood perfectly, and it made him pretty content. His negative emotions were settling down. He didn't know if he could feel any better after such a spill of his past. He honestly was amazed at what she was able to do to him.

As they stayed there, him laying back with his head on her lap and her sitting and playing with his hair and face, a sound reached them. They jerked their heads up swiftly. They fully expected Mako to be coming. Their pounding hearts were evidence enough and their held breaths made it even more obvious.

Instead of Mako, it was Ikki that came into view. She came bounding toward them with a childish bounce in her step that fit her perfectly. She halted suddenly, and nearly toppled over onto them. The only thing that stopped her was her air bending which she used at the last moment. She broke out into loud laughter instantly, an unmatched grin spreading across her face. "Hiya Korra!"

Korra smiled softly up at Ikki. "Hey, Ikki." She looked a bit nervously over at Tahno. She'd gotten him to tell her about what they'd said and it had been pretty cruel. She didn't scold them, hoping they'd just forget about him as a whole. But now Ikki was here. She wondered what he'd do.

Ikki's eyes landed on Tahno and her expression fell noticeably. The shine in her eyes dimmed and her smile was nervous. "Hey, Tahno." She waved weakly.

Tahno grunted in acknowledgement. He didn't want to be outright mean to her, but he wasn't feeling all that charitable either. She may have been a child, but she was old enough to know right from wrong. Her actions before were definitely wrong.

Ikki felt what he was feeling about her. She took in a deep breath and dropped down on her knees next to him. "I'm sorry." She whispered.

Tahno perked. He eyed her with a little less coldness. There was even a hint of curiosity in the depths of his grey orbs. He remained silent. He knew better than to interrupt a child, especially when they were doing something like apologizing.

"I was really mean." She murmured, hanging her head. "I didn't know Korra liked you so much. If I had I'd of been nicer!" She swore. "I thought she hated you like before and would laugh at us chasing you off."

It was not exactly the most endearing apology, she made it sound odd. However he couldn't help but smile at her attempt. Her awkwardness was extremely adorable. "It's fine." He finally answered. The amazing part was he meant it. "I don't blame you." He would have said it was Korra he blames, playfully of course, but he feared Ikki might take it seriously. So he held his tongue. Instead he pinched Korra's hand beneath his to let her know.

Korra made a soft noise of pain and scowled down at him. She pinched him back, understanding his meaning. It was her fault though. Even if it hadn't been she would have smiled at him. She was too close to him now to be mad for something so silly as a pinch and teasing blame.

Ikki's face lit up like the fourth of July. "Really!" She squealed. "Yay!" She threw her arm s around him and hugged him tightly.

Tahno was caught off guard by the affection being given. How did kids do that? They managed to go from sad and sorry to overwhelmed and affectionate in less than a second. He wouldn't know about that of course. He never as given the chance to experience such a thing.

Korra slapped her hands to her mouth and tried to keep her laughter hidden. It was unbearably hilarious the way he stiffened and seemed so stunned. It was also extremely adorable. She just wondered what his next move would be. She hoped he didn't push her away.

Ikki moved on her own, oblivious to his reaction. "Then I can stay here with you two, right!" She cried eagerly, her fists clenched in anticipation. "Jinora is being mean and playing on her own, so I'm bored. I think you two could be fun!" Her face went blank and she cocked a head. "You're fun, right Tahno? I know Korra is. But what about you?"

Tahno appeared to think it over. His mouth became a contemplative frown and his eyes looked out in the distance. For a moment he seemed as if he were fearful, like he thought he would screw up like his parents. Then he sat up and a soft smile formed on his lips. "You bet." He nodded firmly.

Ikki's eyes shined as bright as stars. "Yay!" She jumped to her feet. "Let's play! Let's play!"

Tahno got up to his feet and on his way up took a hold of Ikki. He tossed her in the air playfully and caught her easily. Then he lifted her high above his head and set her on his shoulders. He remembered how he'd seen children been given this opportunity when he was a kid and figured Ikki was about the right age.

Ikki squealed and laughed with pure delight. "Now watch what I can do!" She locked her legs together and leaned backward. She lay flat against him, back to back.

Tahno was initially choked by her action and coughed. He quickly loosened her legs a bit and held onto her instead so she didn't fall. Aside from that it was amusing to watch her.

Ikki kicked off of him and did a flip with the aid of her air bending. She landed perfectly and did an exaggerated bow. "Ta-da!"

Tahno chuckled at her. He turned around to face her. "Perfect." He commended.

She giggled sweetly. "Alright! Now let's play tag!" She darted without any mention of the rules. For all they knew, she could use her air bending. And she would.

Tahno started to chase after her, but stopped suddenly. He looked back at Korra who was now standing. She wore a soft smile and her eyes were somewhere between happy and tearful. It confused him. He didn't realize they were happy tears. "What?"

She shook her head slowly. "Nothing." She hurried toward him patted him lightly on the back as she passed. "We're playing tag right? So you better hurry. Ikki can really run, especially with her air bending!"

Tahno stared at her retreating figure for a moment before snapping out of it. He hurried after them, a smile spreading across his lips. He wondered if this was anything like a parent was supposed to feel with their child. Probably not. Ikki was not his. Surely these feelings would be amplified tenfold. He was just happy he was capable of feeling anything similar. Perhaps he would be able to function despite his parents. Perhaps it would be alright. But maybe it was just Korra. Then…he didn't know what he'd do.

Korra kept her eyes on Ikki and her mind on Tahno as she raced after the child. She was amazed at the amount of enthusiasm and sincerity he put forth in the moments following his trip to the past. Not just that, but this was Ikki. It was the girl who had made fun of him for not being able to bend. She smiled tenderly. It really showed that the real him was better than anyone could have ever imagined. He was not so damaged to not be able to feel like one should to a child.

A person should always forgive them of such innocent sins. They should play with them to their hearts content. A person should do the opposite of what his parents did to him. That reminded her! "Tahno!" She turned around awkwardly in her haste.

Tahno perked, nearly running into her.

She breathed heavily despite the short distance they'd travelled. "You can stay." She breathed, smiling brightly up at him.

Tahno smiled widely. "Thanks." He murmured, stepping closer and pulling her into a tight, tender hug.

Korra didn't think twice about it. She hugged him back. She even laid her head on his chest. It was strange, but she swore she felt a faint flutter of her heart when she did it.

"Hey!" Ikki's voice broke the moment. As they turned their heads they saw a pout on her face. "What're you doing! You're supposed to be chasing me!"

Tahno broke away from her. "We're sorry." He half laughed, rubbing her head. "We were just settling something."

Korra stepped forward. "Tahno's going to stay here now too."

Ikki's face broke out into a wide grin. "Wow! Really!" She almost asked what happened to his old home, but at the last minute she changed her mind. She had a feeling it would be sad. She didn't want to be sad. "That's great!" She had already started to like Tahno. Being able to be around him and having someone to play with all the time would be great. She wouldn't need to rely on Jinora anymore. She was so finicky nowadays.

Tahno smiled down at Ikki. She was just like he imagined all children should be. She made him happy, just like Korra. Only it was a little different.

"Alright!" Ikki clapped her hands. "Now let's play!" She couldn't stay on one topic very long.

Korra laughed. "Alright." She snapped her arm out and tapped Ikki lightly on the head. "You're it!" She turned on her heel, grabbed Tahno's hand, and sprinted.

"Hey!" Ikki stamped her foot. "No fair!" Despite her pout she was thoroughly tickled. She laughed sweetly and sped after them. Of course she used her air bending to help. Otherwise she'd never catch them.

Korra cackled as she ran. She didn't release Tahno. They ran together. It was a bad plan, one that would surely get them caught. But neither cared. It was enough just to be so close and to be having so much fun.

Tahno was especially happy. He watched Korra's exuberant face and nearly forgot his past. Her shine infected him. Her hand warmed him. He gripped her hand a little tighter. Yes, this was perfect. The memories were worth it, just to be with her.

I mostly like how this turned out. It's pretty depressing, but I really wanted to do something on his past. I think the issue I have is with Ikki. I really wanted her to come in so she could bond a bit with Tahno, but something about that scene bugs me. I don't know. It's like it came out of nowhere in a way. Meh. I don't know. What do you think about it? Do you think nothing is wrong? What about the story as a whole? I just hope you enjoyed it. Please review! :D