They were living together.

They were living together.

They were living together.

This thought repeated itself in her head like a silent mantra. Over and over again, the thought still not completely residing within her. Even if it was due to circumstances, even if it wasn't by choice, it didn't erase the fact it was true.

She was awake, sitting upon her bed, taking in her new surroundings. She was in an elegant yet modest sized room, the walls a beautiful bluish gray, giving a subtle tone to the lavender and white themed room. Her bed was large, the sheets white with hints of lavender and gray tones shown in small flowers. Small side tables were on either side couple with delicate lamps and a beautiful mirror combined with a table stood on one side. The view from her window let the early morning sunlight fluttering in. The view was breathtaking, the city of Konoha yawning and stretching, readying itself for the hustle and bustle that would later consume it,

The room was magnificent, everything she had ever dreamed of.

Hinata hugged herself and shivered.

The beauty of the room still couldn't mask the emptiness she felt. The Hyuuga compound wasn't the most welcoming of places but it was her home. When she had entered Naruto's apartment, he had apologized over and over at how small it was and how close to the city it was. She stuttered her words of gratitude, because she always wanted to live in the city, and staying in a luxurious apartment in the heart of Konoha was a blessing she knew she didn't deserve. But, right now, the unfamiliarity of the room frightened her.

She had her firsts within the cold walls of the Hyuuga compound. Her first words, her first steps, her first laughs. It was a place of sadness too. Her first tears, her first screams, her first loss. It wasn't the best of places but it was everything she ever knew and no longer was she there. Her identity had been ripped out in front of her and she had done nothing to stop it.

After all, if she wasn't a Hyuuga, what was she?

When people saw her opal eyes, they knew she was a Hyuuga. When people saw the pale skin and midnight hair, they knew she was a Hyuuga. When people saw her, they knew she was a Hyuuga.

Her achievements, her failures, everything about her was there at the Hyuuga compound, at home.

However, there was a feeling she couldn't deny. A unjustifiable feeling that she almost felt guilty for.

She was free. Gone were the judging eyes so much like hers but oh so different that repeatedly pierced her soul with memories of her failure. Gone were the constant sympathetic nods that were materialization of uncaring pity. Gone were the obligations that forced her to be someone she was not.

People could think those opal eyes were of Hyuuga. People could think the ivory skin and dark hair were of the Hyuuga. But the satisfaction of saying the name "Hinata Uzumaki" seemed almost surreal. The freedom of that name, the limitless boundaries set upon that name, the joy of knowing she had no expectations to meet, there existed no past just a future.

The family that had given her no care, no love, no joy would be gone. And yet, her unyielding heart forced her to miss them, to remember them fondly, to ache for them. These juxtaposing feelings set her being ablaze with anger and confusion. Enough to make tears of sadness fall along with tears of gratitude. Enough to scream with anger and jump with joy.

Hinata had miraculously survived these feelings by falling into a deep sleep after the mysterious words from Naruto relating to their confusing marriage tumbled from his lips. The amount of surprises and heartbreaks had tired her greatly and the sleep helped clear her mind of all burdens. Until, of course, she woke a little before her usual time, a few hours after sunrise.

Her personal musings stretched for hours, or so she imagined. They were disturbed when an alarm suddenly pierced through the walls of her room, although the source of the nuisance was not in the room, and she shook in surprise. Hinata sat in shock, wondering what else could happen to her during this extremely confusing part of her life. A few minutes later the alarm stopped and another one started, and Hinata yet again jolted in surprise.

Whats going on? she thought.

This happened again after a few minutes and yet again after a few more for about half an hour until she heard a distant, aggravated groan, loud enough to be heard through the walls of her room. Hnata waited yet again, this entire ordeal had piqued her interest greatly. She heard an extremely noisy thump and a yell mixed with some swearing and she covered her mouth in bafflement. Then the door beside her room opened in what she knew Naruto thought was quietness.

It was quickly replaced with him yelling yet again, even louder and with more swearing, after a loud thud was heard. Hinata stifled her giggles. The part of 'waking up' in his morning routine seemed like a real challenge and it amused her greatly.

He had explained to her the night before that Shikamaru had told him he had to arrive the next day, a big meeting between a lot of companies was to occur, and no reason could get him out.

Naruto was extremely apologetic but Hinata didn't mind, his obligations were important and spending a day with a friend, she was a wife in name only, seemed really unimportant to her as well. He had still apologized over and over, promising to spend the day after with her so they could talk and try to pull any lose ends left over.

Hinata, still situated on her bed, wondered if she should go and greet him, but it seemed almost irrelevant, her presence would only make things more awkward as they needed space between one another to sort their thoughts out. As his heavy footsteps were heard coming out from the bathroom and into the hall, she smiled genuinely.

Really, this wasn't home, but hearing his footsteps gave her more comfort than her own home ever could. So, she lay upon her bed yet again, the knowledge of knowing his warmth was still residing inside of her new home drifted her off into another deep slumber, this time with happier thoughts and bigger dreams.

On Naruto's way back home, he stopped at the place that he considered, with dark irony, his second home. The cemetery.

He wanted to cry, with all his power he wanted to cry. Wanted the tears to overwhelm his being and cleanse his soul, for him to stop living in the past and start anew. He wanted them to take control of his body and wanted to cry with his heart and with his soul.

He hadn't cried since Jiraiya died. He hadn't felt himself since Jiraiya died.

He felt, he felt something he hadn't ever before. It wasn't loneliness, after all, how could it be? He had everything that had taken away that loneliness away. Although Jiraiya's death had left a hole in his heart he knew could not be replaced, he had gotten over it, slowly but he had. The change wasn't immediately after his death, but slowly, he began to feel it.

It wasn't as if it were a feeling that was causing this, but more, a lack of. He couldn't see what he was missing, he had everything, he was simply being ungrateful, he concluded. But, it did affect him, it did change him in a very unique, yet annoying way.

His mood wasn't different, he was still the same happy go-lucky, Naruto. Nothing could change that, and he knew it. His elevated moods with his friends wasn't a facade either, he truly felt content with them. But, the change he felt was inside. He didn't eat properly, he was training more and more than he should, he was spending late hours working.

Naruto had no explanation as to why. "I know, I know, I should speak with someone, Ino maybe, she's the best psychiatrist in Konoha after all. But, it seems too irrelevant, there's no need to go that far for some weird feeling in the pit of my stomach." his words rang hollow to the people he knew would never reply.

All the people that help me always end up dead anyways, was the thought that struck his mind so suddenly. "You know, this place doesn't even make me upset anymore, just scared. How many more people I know are going to end up here? How many more do I vow to save but then never come around? I always think that, if I try hard enough, maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to save them..."

He couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence but he knew that he couldn't. Death always came, no matter his delay, and gently pried his tight, bloody fingers open, revealing the next person who Naruto could not save.

"I guess I'm just tired." Tired against the one sided battle with death.

What Naruto did not know was the battle with death was already over. He had known that, because for so long no one he knew ended up to this place, the place that welcomed his presence constantly. He had known, so few days ago he had known.

Another thing he didn't know was his habit of replacing this emotion, this weird feeling in the pit of his stomach, as he called it, for another. This unknown and foreign feeling, or lack of, frightened the scathed soldier. He was not ready to fight another battle, he was too exhausted and worn out from the one with death. This battle that had always been raging on in the pit of his heart, not stomach mind you, was finally emerging, showing its face and he unknowingly feared it because once again, training, working hard, putting in all his effort could not keep it away.

So he did what he saw best fit, replacing it with the helplessness with death he had long conquered because that was the closest feeling to it that he knew. He was tired, he knew that, but from a battle that was very long and was now going to rear its horrendous face but in a beautiful, yet painful way.

The real enemy stood behind the tree, staring at the blond, shaking its head in an almost apologetic way because he had so much more to fight for, so much more he had to discover about himself before this battle could be won.

Really, who had ever considered love an ally?

"Shizune? Please come to Naruto's house right away! Please hurry!"

"Hinata? Hinata, whats wrong?! Why do you sound so scared?"

"Naruto suddenly collapsed, Come quickly please!"

Authors Notes

Dun dun duuuuun. Quite a cliff hanger, am I right haha. Anyways, guess whos back with another long overdue chapter they aren't that satisfied with ? Damn, I can't even explain how bad I feel lmao but here I am, back again.

But I'm not just back with a short chapter, I rewrote chapter 2. I just felt the whole Shikamaru plan was kinda extra and unnecessary, and I've simplified it greatly. There still is a plan by Shikamaru but, again, a lot less complicated. I haven't posted it yet. I still feel like I need to know from you all if I should or not.

I also fixed the previous chapter even though you guys didn't flame it like I was expecting. I personally thought, when I read it later, it didn't make a lot of sense. If anyone still experiences any confusion, feel free to complain or PM me.

So again, I can't promise you all when I will start posting like a proper author. Someone anonymously left a review saying 'don't start what you can't finish'. That is not true at all because one thing I will do is definitely finish this damn story. I still enjoy writing it, don't worry, it's just been much harder to do so. I can see where that anon is salty from, but leaving it is not one of my plans.

I also have a new poll. Please be sure to partake in it, it will have something to do with a new story. (Yes I know I should probably finish one first)

Thank you again for keeping with my bullshit, I'm sorry if this doesn't meet your needs, review it all you want and flames are welcome as long as they make sense. PM me any time for anything. See y'all, in a year. (that was a joke, I hope)