Draco's parents were home before midnight, and he wondered downstairs to meet them, his thick black dressing gown over his pyjamas. Voldemort had left, after being kind enough to utter a cleaning spell over the bed, but he left Draco to wash his face himself. Voldemort had bid Draco goodnight and apparated away without another word. Draco had showered again, three times in fact and was considering a forth when his parents returned. Draco wondered if they would notice that he was, in fact, an entirely different person from the boy they left behind just hours before. But his mother rushed over to him and hugged and kissed him like he was the most precious thing in the world. He didn't have the heart to tell her that he was no longer her precious little boy, but some filthy, marred interloper who should be flung out into the street.

His father seemed to have had a little to drink, but was in a cheery mood. Draco was keen to get to bed so as to be out of the way if that mood changed. He made his excuses and took a sleeping draft, certain as he was that he would get no sleep without it. Returning to his room, the battleground where he had lost the fight so spectacularly, he was glad he had taken twice the recommended dose of sleeping draft, as it was merely moments before he fell asleep in his armchair, not having wanted to be on the bed just yet.

He awoke in his bed hours later, and realised his mother must have come to say goodnight and moved him there. Part of him wanted to jump up and throw the covers off and go... Anywhere, really, downstairs maybe, but the bed was warm and exceptionally comfortable.

The thick heavy blankets enveloped him in an embrace and he was reminded of the embrace he had been held in just hours before. He felt horrified as he became aware that he was getting hard as he remembered lips on his neck, a cold hand pumping his dick, a thick hard cock in his mouth... Draco had never hated himself more than he did in that moment, which was an achievement in itself, for he was internally wracked with self loathing. What other feeling could underpin the vile mask of arrogance he perpetually wore? Oh, Draco knew he was attractive, knew he was rich, charming and well bred, but his insecurities came from thinking he lacked any of the more important character traits. He thought the fact he had behaved as he had done this evening proved it, and the fact he was now hard thinking about it, showed beyond doubt that he was a vile, despicable excuse for a person.

'Think about something else!' He told himself sharply. 'Pansy and Granger in the girls locker rooms. 'Pansy pushes Granger up against the lockers and slips her hand up her skirt..'. Draco began to touch himself. 'Granger tries to cry for help, but Pansy forces her lips over her mouth and her hand moves to the warm spot between Grangers legs and pulls aside her white panties...'

Oh, who was he kidding? He hadn't been wanking about girls for months now. It was as if he was trying to prove something to himself now, and it wasn't working. The image of Pansy and Hermione in the locker room dissolved and his mind began to cloud again with memories of Voldemort's touch, his smell, his taste...

Call up an old favourite, though Draco...

'Your behaviour in class today has been far below what I expect from you Mr. Malfoy', Snape drawls. 'You may be my favorite student, but I am afraid I must punish you.' Snape grabs me and pulls me to the couch... Since when was there a couch in the potions room?' Maybe the detention was in his office or something,' it doesn't matter', Draco reminded himself, it's a fantasy, but he was a stickler for detail!

'Snape pulls me over to the couch and sits down. He turns me and stares at me with his dark penetrating eyes. 'Take down your trousers, Mr Malfoy.' Hesitantly I obey him. 'And your underwear.' Snape adds coolly. I do as I am told. Snape pulls me over his lap and admires my firm, pale ass cheeks for a moment. I'm going to spank you, Mr. Malfoy.'' He whispers...

Draco, in his bed at the Manor was fully erect now, in the midst of this, one of his most visited fantasies and he worked his dick with his hand, slowly at first.

Snape raises his hand and slaps my ass with great force. It stings like hell, the sound resonates around the room and I yelp with pain. Snape takes no notice and spanks me again across the other cheek this time and takes a moment to watch as the skin reddens. I shout in pain as Snape follows up with several short, sharp slaps. 'I'm going to spank you till you cry, Malfoy!' Snape hisses at me...'

In bed, Draco was masturbating furiously now as he imagined the scene. He imagined himself getting hard as Snape spanked him, and Snape deciding to fuck him over the desk as further punishment for being such a little pervert.

Draco was so close to orgasm when a dark though crossed his mind. If he could fantasise about this type of thing, then surely he deserved everything he got? If his choice of wank material were scenes in which he was disciplined and humiliated by an older man, surely he should welcome Voldemort's attention? Just as he climaxed, the image of Snape disappeared and was replaced with one of Voldemort, Voldemort fucking him over the desk in his father's study.

Draco ran to the bathroom and was violently sick. Slumped on the cold bathroom floor he chastised himself. 'You deserve everything you get, you are sick and perverted, you did nothing, NOTHING to resist him. You are a filthy little whore and your family will disown you'.

A battle raged in his head as though two versions of himself were fighting a war. 'What could I do?' the kinder Draco argued. 'I was afraid and I didn't know what to do, I couldn't run, I thought he would kill me if I didn't do what he wanted'.

'But you didn't have to LIKE it!' The critical Draco retorted. 'And the way you think about Snape, and the way you fool around with Blaise, you're gonna get it one day, good and proper and it'll be your own fault!'

'But I'm 15!' Wailed the other Draco. 'I'm allowed to be interested in sex, aren't I? And I'm allowed to fantasise about things I don't actually want to happen in reality, aren't I?'

'What do you want to happen in reality?' Taunted the cruel Draco.

'I want someone to love me.' Answered the kind Draco. Draco could hear laughter inside his head.

'Some chance of that! Who would love something so filthy and sullied as you? After what you have done? No one will love you!'

'Shut up!' Draco shouted out loud to silence the voices, then he realised how crazy he sounded as he was alone in the bathroom. His shout seemed to have rejoined the 2 sides of his personality though and logical, structured thought returned.

He had done something bad, but it wasn't entirely his fault. No one knew about it, he just had to stay in control. 'You're a Malfoy. Behave like one!'