Miranda was tired after T.I.M.'s debriefing. She hadn't exactly been reprimanded, but he wasn't happy about losing the facility. When Miranda told him, Wilson was the one who reprogrammed the rioting mechs, all he said was that she should have seen it coming. After all, she was supposed to be his right-hand woman. She sighed as she left the communication room while craning her neck to stretch out some worries.
She decided to check up on Shepard still in the med-bay, the doctors had told her to come by, but she didn't have time until now, 3 days since arriving. Work was a poor excuse for not checking up on her, well, work. But she had so many documents to fill and reports to send out since the facility lost a lot of men and women. She just hoped Shepard would understand why she hadn't been by to say hi.
Why do you care if Shepard understands or not? You are literally nothing to each other. You rebuilt her, yes. But she's still Alliance to a fault, and you're Cerberus not a good match. And then there's that… Miranda's thoughts abruptly cut off as she noticed Shepard resting a hand on the lower back of the doctor examining her lung. Shepard was smiling and the doctor was blushing. It didn't require a mind such as Mirandas to recognize flirting this obvious. Nevertheless, she entered and steeled her expression and strode up to the bed with an apparently quite drugged up Shepard.
"Hiii Miri you beautiful sexy woman you! These painkillers are really really good. You should try them out." The commander happily exclaimed and gestured wildly with her free hand. The doctor immediately scolded her, "Sit still commander! I'm trying to drain your lung of excess blood... Again... Next time you leave your bed and open up the wound I'm inclined to let you bleed internally until it becomes too painful for you to even lie down." The blonde snapped, Miranda took notice that the hand never left her back, and she didn't ask Shepard to move it.
"Doctor if you will, I can do the rest of the procedure" She said, commanded, to the doctor with a blush.
"Of course Ms. Lawson. I'll just…" She trailed off and relinquished her tools, the hand on her back tightened enough to make her pinned against the side of the bed.
"Awww doc, please don't go! You have such pretty eyes! I wanna marry youu!" Jane dreamily sung.
"Shepard, oh Shepard, of course I'll marry you!" The doctor screamed, threw her arms around her neck and kissed her deeply while staring down Miranda.
Miranda stood with the tube and vacuum pipe in her hands, her fingers tightened around the tools with each passing second. That is until her name was called for the third time, "Miranda! Stop!" Shepard slurred raised voice broke through the daydreaming Miranda.
The Australian looked at her hands and notice the doctors' fingers in her tight grip, the fingertips turning white and the doctors face scrunched up in pain. She released her as fast as she could and profusely apologized. The doctor looked at her, "It's fine Ms. Lawson," then she turned to Shepard "And you, remember to stay right here, I'm sure a lot of people would get really angry and hurt if you died again" The doctor finished the sentence looking at Miranda, who had her eyes trained on Shepard's face.
"Of course, doc… Hey it's a little strange isn't it. I was dead not long ago… Wow… I'm gonna rest, my head is spinning like a…" She passed out mid-sentence.
"Sorry, she didn't seem like she was in any state of mind to follow your orders." Miranda said with a hand on the sedative IV.
"Are you sure you should give her such high doses?" The doctor asked in worry.
"Oh don't worry, her cybernetics and other upgrades will burn through the sedative. She can even drink Ryncol without dying." Miranda was amused at the surprise on the doctors face.
"But… That is like acid, it can melt through metals!" She said in shock.
"I know, most poisons and acids are harmless to Shepard now, and her tolerance for alcohol is likewise boostef. I took the liberty to upgrade whatever I could on her while I rebuilt her. See her arm?"
"Yeah what about it?" The doctor raised a curious eyebrow.
"Put your hands on the shoulder" the doctor did as told, "Feel the joint?" the doctor nodded, "push upwards and see if anything is out of the ordinary".
The doctor poked around but couldn't find what Miranda was referring to. She tried getting under the muscle by prodding from the sides, and that's when she felt it. A small rise in the bone about a quarter of an inch in width and an inch in length. "What the…" the doctor furrowed her brows and kept poking and feeling the arm. She felt more of those bumps along Shepard's upper arm.
"The entire arm is reconstructed from Carbon, Titanium and a special Element Zero alloy to allow biotics to flow through it like in an organic arm" Miranda proudly announced.
"This is incredible! How did you manage to do this? Never mind, I don't want to know. Shepard told me she died and was brought back… If that's possible I'm not sure I want to continue in this field, that takes playing god to an uncomfortably real level." She held up her hands like she didn't want to touch Jane anymore.
"I know…" Miranda scowled, keeping her eyes focused on the sleeping Shepard. Her hands did the draining procedure without her noticing. 2 years of working on Shepard had made her weirdly accustomed to the commander's body, she knew every in and out and could perform wonders on it without thinking. She's just a project… DO NOT get attached Miranda! But.. NO! No buts.. just shut up and move along.
"She's lucky to have you Ms. Lawson, she told me how lost she felt after waking up. I don't think she meant to, the drugs must have clouded her judgement. She told me about you, how you were the first thing she saw as she woke up. She even said you were the most beautiful woman she has laid her eyes upon. After that she went of on a tangent about the Asari's head crests and kept flirting with me, she's actually really down to earth. Not at all what I expected from a legend. I think I might actually like her." The doctor blushed again and laughed softly before she bid Miranda farewell.
Miranda waited for the doors to hiss a second time before speaking, "Oh Shepard, you really know how to worm your way into people's heads. I leave you alone for three days and already you're converting Cerberus employees to the fellowship of Shepard. You will be an immense pain in my ass in the future. But I believe you're worth it." She smiled to herself and kissed Shepard on the cheek. As soon as she did she regretted giving in. Because now she wanted to feel Shepard's skin under her lips again.
She dismissed the thoughts as she got settled into the corner of the couch. She ghosted her fingers across her lips, an involuntary smile was plastered on her face for the rest of the night until she fell asleep on the couch.
Shepard was sweating and thrashing, her nightmare was of that faithful day. The day she was spaced was the worst day in her life, Liara and Tali were the ones who took the last escape pod with Joker. The three of them saw their Commander get blown away from the ship and into the vacuum of space. Shepard remembered the way Tali was beating on the glass most likely yelling and crying at the same time. She didn't want to leave them there, but it was her or them. And Shepard always chose her team.
Her nightmare didn't stop there, she felt her airways constrict and stop her lungs from expanding. It was like drowning, falling towards a planet in space was like floating in water with lungs full of liquid. Disoriented and cold. Before she even reached the atmosphere, she was gone. The darkness had finally won.
Shepard was still dreaming and tossing in her bed, her biotics flared due to the stress of the dream. The entire med-bay shook, it was like it was hit by an earthquake. Miranda was shaken awake, her eyes widened in shock at the sight. Shepard's body was still on the bed, small wisps of blueish purple energy appeared all over her body, travelled in a short arc until it disappeared into her skin again. It was like watching a simmering fire while out camping. Shepard threw her head to the side and sent a window pane out of it's socket in the wall. Alarms went off in the space station, waking Shepard from her slumber, just as disoriented as she was in the dream. Her eyes unfocused yet her body worked on instinct, she threw off the covers, jumped off the side of the bed and headed for the door. But her legs give out under her as soon as she landed, only a hand on her shoulder stopped her path towards the floor.
"Air.. I… need… air" Shepard wheezed between large gulps of air without looking at Miranda, and tossed a hand towards the door.
"Okay Jane, let's get you out of here" Miranda cautiously put Shepard's arm around her shoulder to support the dazed Commander. She could feel the biotic energy tingle every nerve that was exposed to Shepard's touch, it was almost intense enough to numb her skin, and Shepard's panicked grip was so strong she dislocated Miranda's shoulder. She had to set Shepard's mind at ease, Shepard wanted air outside, and Miranda complied. She guided the woman currently going through an anxiety attack or nervous breakdown to the only place she could call outside. A large room filled with trees and grass, luckily very close to the medbay. Shepard had no intention of waiting, she threw herself into the grass and rolled over on her back. She breathed in deeply through her nose, and exhaled slowly. Jane repeated the action a couple of times until she felt calm again.
"I'm sorry…" Shepard said as she closed her eyes and turned her head away from Miranda in shame. She twisted her head around again when Miranda spoke.
"It's okay Shepard. No one expected you to not be affected by the experience of dying. The cognitive stress must be immense, I couldn't begin to imagine how waking up after suffocating like that must feel like. I would be more surprised if you didn't react this way some time sooner or later. Although I must check your Biotic Amp and your cybernetics. That was quite a scare you gave me there." She winced and clutched her shoulder, it didn't go unnoticed by Shepard.
"Oh god! I'm so sorry Miranda, I promise I'll make this up to you someday" Shepard apologized but didn't get up from the position in the grass.
"It's my duty to protect you and keep you healthy, my shoulder has been through worse than that." Miranda smiled at the exhausted Shepard.
"Good to know you aren't fragile" Shepard winked at her and closed her eyes, "I think I'd like to sleep here instead if that's okay with you?"
"Whatever you want Shepard. I feel like I should warn you though, if people see you sleep here they will look at you weirdly in the future." Miranda added in a soft voice.
"Ah, you worry too much about image. Just do whatever you want, people will follow you even with a few eccentricities and quirks. You're welcome to join me right here if you want to." She laughed and smiled while wiggling her eyebrows, still with closed eyes.
"I would rather sleep in my bed, but thank you for the offer, goodnight Shepard"
"G'night Miranda"
The operative turned to leave but went to the bench nearby instead, she sat down and pulled out her omni-tool, flipped through a couple of reports until she hit the one she was looking for. The title, "The first human Spectre", she opened the file and started reading about Shepard's heroics. She had always been fascinated by her ever since she was announced as the first human to join the ranks. Humans were short lived, they had tempers and let emotions cloud their thoughts and decisions, according to other species. But Shepard did it, the pinnacle of humanity indeed. Miranda admired the tenacity she displayed during her mission to stop Saren, the rouge spectre. She wished she had made different choices in life, just to have been closer to that event. At least she was there now, close to the legend. Maybe closer than anyone else, she did rebuilt her from barely nothing, that had to count for something.
You need another hobby Miranda!... I know…
She shut off the Omni and started observing Shepard's peaceful expression as she pushed her nose into the grass. Someone with more power than a regular 3-man squad laying innocently in the grass was an amusing sight, she had to capture the moment. She snapped a quick picture of Shepard with a dumb grin on her lips. Once she determined Shepard wasn't going to have another nightmare she left the bench and headed to her own room for some proper sleep.
When she finally got dressed in her usual sleep attire, a pair of panties accompanied by either a large shirt; a nightgown or a bare chest better known as topless, she pulled up the picture of Shepard on a datapad and smiled to herself before closing her eyes.
Shepard… Why did it have to be you I rebuilt? Two years of my life I studied you, your body, your everything. I never expected this to be the outcome. How I wish I could've known it before I took the job. Then I wouldn't have to hide these… feelings you brought up in me. I wish I could just stay loyal to Cerberus and forget about you, lead my own life as I saw fit. But now I have you, here, about to lead a team with me, how can I not fall for that just a little bit? You're a god damn hero, and I have admired you for so long. Then you said my name like that. How am I ever going to be able to say no to you?
The war with herself had just started and she knew it would only get worse. She just hoped that once they were out there, doing stuff, it would take her mind off of Shepard. Just for a while she would like to be her old self. But the two years had changed her, she admired the woman, sure. But knowing so much about her and what she did, she may have fallen for her. Time would give her an answer, or Tali would. Either way she would find an answer to the conflict between emotions and rationality.
Her loyalties lay with Cerberus, they gave her purpose and protection when no one else would. But Shepard pulled at her heartstrings. She knew T.I.M. wouldn't approve of her if she decided to pursue Shepard romantically. The consequences were too severe to even think about, what would he do to her sister? What would he do to her?
Just go to sleep and rebuild the walls that has kept you from making mistakes all these years. Tomorrow you will curb these thoughts and stay professional, don't waver now. You've spent too much time climbing the ranks to throw it away now… But, it's Shepard! I know, I'm you, just.. you without the mind of a teenager.. Fine, tomorrow we start over, we will stop Shepard's advances if she makes any and then we will complete this mission of our to stop the collectors. You're the Ice queen, no one stands in your way. Not even yourself!
As much as she would like to stop any and all thoughts of Shepard, she couldn't stop her own dreams from conjuring images of the commanders smile, or her hair, or those immaculate breasts of hers that she had recreated and spent too much time staring at.
AN: To avoid another retelling of the games this story will be very different from the games. The reaper invasion isn't looming over their heads, the collectors and The Illusive man are the main antagonists, with Henry Lawson being a close third. So no conduit child thingy, no doomsday at least for now. It will be more of a "normal" version of the story, where the bad guys aren't an ancient threat but simply misguided and disturbed people, along with an insect-like species that abducts asari and turians too. I read a couple of stories and most of them takes the games scenes and simply fills out more personal interaction between the missions. I want to avoid this becoming yet another one of those, but I will still pull inspiration and events from the games, just out of order and with a different purpose.