Disclaimer: I don't anything related to CSI NY. I feel your guys' pain at typing this over and over...it smarts.
Today I was determined to show my partner I was not a 'girl' and picked his pocket while he was grabbing something out of the back of the break room fridge. Now I have to attend a sexual harassment course because my boss doesn't have a sense of humor about these kinds of things. FML
Today I was kissing my new girlfriend when I murmured the name Peyton. FML
Today my wife and I took our daughter and her boyfriend out to dinner. While I was in the middle of eating my black king snapper, I was about to threaten him with a live autopsy if he didn't treat her right when we were interrupted by my old college girlfriends stopping by the table wanting to say hi. FML
Today after interviewing some executives well trained in karate…I wanted to see if I could work some moves. Unfortunately one of my heels punctured the water cooler jug near the elevators, shorting it out. Now we have to walk up the entire thirty five floors. FML
Today I decided to tell my boss off after finding out that all of my lucky numbers came up on the NY state lotto! I was in the middle of yelling at him about how I have had it up to here with his barking orders at us hard working cops, when my girlfriend pulled me aside and showed me that my numbers matched last week's lotto. I hope my temporary reassignment to the St. Patrick's Day parade detail goes smoothly. FML
Today I was manhandled and searched when the Federal Reserve security alarms went off. Thank god they found the gold bar in my knapsack where my buddy put it, before the other guards had a chance to snap on the rubber gloves. FML
Today I was called out to a scene and arrived to see my ex-girlfriend being interviewed by the detective I used to have 'dinner, a few drinks, and some laughs' with. Not to mention my wife canvassing the area for more evidence. Sometimes it doesn't pay to get up in the morning. FML
Today was my day to clean out our cruiser. When I was done, my partner and I spent our 'lunch' hour in it. It wasn't until after, that we realized that the back doors only open from the outside. FML
Today my new partner and I were examining a doll when our boss walked by saying what a lovely family we made. FML
Today I decided to get a haircut, when I overhead a tech say that I looked like a grown up Steve Urkel. FML
I know I lamed out over the last one but he is really hard to make fun of. I would do something from It Happened To Me but to me, that would be cruel. As always I hope you enjoyed reading what my weird brain has come up for the team, and would appreciate a review. Thank you! :)