Descent into Darkness:
We'd landed on Aardat and although it was really quite a short trip; I guess I'd fallen asleep, because I didn't remember much of anything after takeoff. Captain San Wan poked me a couple of times and I awoke in a bit of a panic.
"It's alright Amornam; we're there." The captain said in a quite calm tone.
"Oh yes, sorry sir." I whispered as I glanced around the compartment. No-one but the captain seemed to have noticed my sudden startle. I let out a sigh as I gathered my whits about me. Hate it when that happens. I thought to myself.
"It's OK." Captain San Wan sighed too as he gave my shoulder a reassuring pat. "Another thing you won't ever have to worry about on the other side of eternity." He smiled peacefully.
"Yeah, that's true." I let out a sigh and a little chuckle of my own. "I'm sure being crucified came with it's own set of psychological side effects too." I commented.
"A man of sorrows afflicted with our grief." Captain San Wan replied. "Yes, Amornam, you're probably right." He said as he got up and grabbed his briefcase from the overhead safe.
Katook, who was already leaning over the seats in front of us yapping with Japah; put his arm around me and slapped me on the chest a few times when I stood up.
"Yeah, thanks." I mumbled to him.
"You're welcome." He smiled before he went back to his chatter.
Funny how he seems to know these things even without having actually witnessed the brief blip in my state of mind. I began to reflect as we started to follow Japah and Sentury up the isle. But than again, I know the same of him. I guess that's another thing about being a clone. I don't know of any other sentient beings who are so precisely in synch; except maybe identical twins? I pondered a moment as my eyes scanned the lot of other passengers who were also working their way off this transport.
But than again, how do you not be so intimately connected when you were hatched out of the same batch and spent your entire lives bound together. I can't even imagine not being in this army surrounded by all these other clones. Even with the emotional baggage we carry off the battlefield; I can only think that life on the outside has to be extremely lonely. I sighed as I passed a single mother attempting to pacify two small children.
We'd exited the transport and were headed off the loading deck when I stopped suddenly to look for Katook. He was back a couple of meters entertaining one of the children while the mother loaded the other into a carriage. I've never seen a clone who wanted his very own and so very badly too.
"Come on Katook." I chuckled as I ran back to retrieve him. "We got to go pick up our gear. They checked it into baggage." I shook my head at this wee inconvenience as Katook waved bye bye to his new little Savawarhian buddy.
"You really ought to open nursery school." I joked as we hurried back to the others.
"Yeah, Clone Cuddles Child Care." Katook laughed. "Complete with compassionate combat training."
"Heh." I just looked at him, shook my head and gave him a friendly shove.
"Hey, there's nothing wrong with knowing how to survive when you've got to fight!" Katook stated rather smugly.
"Never said there was." I answered as I grabbed him by the head and proceeded to mess his hair.
"Hey, I spent a whole two seconds to look this good!" He protested while smacking my hands away and giving his hair a shake. I just stood there momentarily, glared at him and smirked.
We all hurried down stairs to pick up our things before we hopped on the tube that ran us to the next complex of buildings. This was the actual aero-defense headquarters where our ship, fully outfitted with this new super warp awaited. Here we were to pick up a mechanic, a navigation expert and a pilot.
After the nuisance of several more security checkpoints was; (less than enthusiastically) plodded through, we finally arrived at our destination. The hanger was busy with mechanics, robots and high brass... discussing (or rather arguing) over what ever it is high brass contend about. Needless to say, they did seem genuinely happy to see Captain San Wan. We hung back a bit, while the captain spoke to his admirals. We could over hear bits and pieces of their conversation, as they'd asked Captain San Wan if he'd been briefed yet. He confirmed with a nod that he'd received his instructions back before we left Savawarh.
"Well good!" We heard one of the admirals give a hearty bellow. "Now if the rest of your crew can just get their hover craft out from the lower streets; we'd be all set to go!"
All the wheels of progress held up by a measly juggernaut. Oh just the thought of sitting bumper to bumper in squealing vehicle horns with the scorching heat radiating up off the pavement was enough to give me a headache. In all the millennia of progress and the strides made to clean cheap energy; no-one had solved the simple quagmire of the common traffic jam. Kind of like the common cold! I think we were forever destine just to be stuck with it! I chuckled.
Well, this little difficulty didn't deter Captain San Wan from our usual pre-mission ritual. Even after several invites to his natural born Earth colleges; with the exception of Dr. Salichika, Captain San Wan found himself alone with his clones... again. How odd I often thought this to be, as we proceeded down to the basement chapel of the defense headquarters. Two non-humans and four clone soldiers, all to take part in an ancient ceremony that had been practiced on Earth for millennia before any of us ever came along; the Lord's supper. "Do this in remembrance of me."
"I Am your rock and your shield; your exceeding great reward. I am with you where ever it is you go; even unto the uttermost corners of My creation. I will never leave you or forsake you." Our good captain opened with a few modest words of encouragement. We continued on with a selection of songs chosen by Katook and Japah and than Sentury commenced with a reading of Scripture text.
My mind began to wander, as it always does. I thought of the battles we've all been in and those who were no longer here with us. My mind commonly tracked down this path. The path of ticking off all the brothers I'd lost; as well as the brothers of others I'd killed. What a sad world we live in. Such a sad universe that it's come to this. I sighed. Yet there is a time and a season to every purpose under heaven. A time for war, a time for peace; a time to laugh a time to cry and a time to zip through space in search of lost loved ones. Yes, no denying there were technical and scientific advances to be learned from this flight; but as for this clone? My primary reason for applying to this mission was to find an old friend. I missed Shiloh dearly.
"For without the shedding of blood there is no remission of sins." Sentury continued to read.
My mind instantly jumped to the blood doused kitchen of the fraternity house. I could see one assailant lunging at me with a J-shaped pipe. I could feel myself falling backwards and the contents on the counter-top spilling over me. I grabbed the first thing I laid eyes on; a bloodied kitchen knife and swung it up at the oncoming form. The warm red splatter peppered everything in one continuous spray, as the body veered to the left and fell on top of me. The scream that filled the air brought a second attacker running. He raised a lone pipe high over his head and swung strait down at my face. I lurched forward, the kitchen knife still in my hand. I heard a groan; as I pulled my arm down and more warm red fluid came pouring out. The combatant who'd momentarily towered over me, dropped like a rock to the floor before me. I bolted up at the sudden charge of a third pair of feet. This time it was Japah.
"Nakam?" His voice seemed to question as his eyes drifted down toward the tangled mess of bodies that lay at my feet. When I peered down at the carnage myself; I could finally see what had really happened. I had severed one's femoral artery and slit the other's throat.
I put my head down in my hands and tried to shake the memory out. I sat up and forced myself to look intensely at each of my brothers. We were all still here, even if the victims of a wholly different form of violation were not. Just another battle in this war on evil. I told myself as a lump began to well up in my throat. Sentury paused a moment from his reading and looked up at me.
"No greater love has a man than he lay down his life for a friend." He suddenly quoted. "For I will bind up the broken hearted, heal all their wounds and set the captives free."
Yeah, set the captives free. The tears suddenly started flooding out. Oh how much it seemed I needed to be freed from the memories in my head, more so than the actual events that put them there. For some things that only happened once; how is it they get so stuck? I cried.
A few moments passed before I finally came to pay attention to the fact that someone was handing me something where with to dry my tears. I'd also come to realize that I was clenching Katook in a death grasp. When we looked at each other though, I'd noticed he'd shed a few tears of his own; so I guess it was OK. We both started to laugh as we sat up and gave the other a good-natured, hearty slap on the back. It's still with in reasonable confines; we snickered with a bit of embarrassment. After all, we're still clones; we like hugs.
Sentury went on to read a bit more while I sat quietly and processed my own momentary crisis. I thought for a bit about how Katook had come to visit me in psychiatric observation wing a few days later. He said that after they'd released him from the hospital; he went back to the university dormitory to find Japah fully armored, laying in bed sound asleep. He even had his helmet on. Japah told Katook that when he'd gotten back, after being released from the precinct; he just felt better that way. I guess it's that you expect someone to attack you on a battlefield; but not in the course of a semester of college life. Yeah, I can understand that. I sighed. Poor Japah, he was all alone. All the rest of us had still been in the hospital.
I'd gotten lost again in my thoughts when Katook nudged me and handed me a cracker of unleavened bread. Oh, we're at this part already. I thought to myself as I broke a piece off and handed the rest to Japah. 'My body broken for you.' My mind tracked down another path now, as I heard the snap of Sentury breaking off his piece of bread. Broken, like broken bones. It hurts to be broken. I sighed. But at least God really does understand that. I thought to myself as I flipped the morsel of cracker I was holding back and forth a few times.
"Do this in remembrance of me." Captain San Wan quoted.
Yeah, remembrance of me. I thought. Remember that I'd been broken too and that I'd even been broken for you; a carbon copy man whom other natural born humans had argued for centuries as to whether or not you actually had a soul? I paused a moment and smirked before I popped the cracker in my mouth.
"This is the New Testament in my blood which was shed for many for the remission of sins" Captain San Wan went on, as he picked up the cup in front of him.
New Testament in blood. I thought for a moment, while Katook handed me the challis. Blood that splattered across my face. I suddenly felt a bit ill as I peered into the goblet. I can do this. Katook grabbed my arm while I took a deep breath and swallowed a gulp of wine, than handed the cup to Japah. That's always bothered me since the battle of Chaporah. I tried not to think about the flashes of memories that sprinted through my conscience. I could still see them hanging upside down as the life drained from them. The cronkies nearly beat Sentury to death because he refused to drink it. Then they tossed us in a pit and doused us with it.
"Uhh!" I shook the thoughts away, my stomach churning with every memory. What a twisted world. I let out a long sigh as my eyes drifted over toward Japah. He had his head down, staring at the floor between his feet. I reached over and grabbed his arm for I could hear him sniffle. He moved a bit to take hold of my hand. As the four of us sat there clasped together; Captain San Wan started to pray.
My mind entered another meandering path, while I listened to him ask for God's protection. Yes, please protect us all; we certainly need it! I prayed too. The captain went on a minute or so more and I kept thinking of Jesus and the centurion standing beneath him with the spear in his hand. I thought for a moment about that dream I'd had shortly after Echo and Charlie squads had caught up with us at Chaporah. The blood seemed to splash over me endlessly. I remember being disgusted, tormented and full of rage. Than I looked up and realized that the soldier standing at the foot of the cross was me.
Several weeks passed while I strove to stop this odd dream from driving me mad. I tried to talk, but couldn't open my mouth. (Other than I did manage to thank the sargent of Charlie Company for burying the rest of our squad.) I guess I'd kind of snapped at that point. As much as I wanted to help lay my brothers to rest; I just couldn't do it. I knew something about me needed to be fixed, but I had such a hard time wrapping my hands around it? It seemed the more I tried to catch my mind, the more it slipped away from me!
They sent the four of us to the torture victims asylum on Aardat for rehabilitation. That's where we'd met Shiloh. His squad had fallen victim to a far different form of twisted torture though. They'd spent almost 3 years as captives and though most of them survived the imprisonment; only two of them were still alive 18 months after release. Those that perished, had done so by their own hand.
My thoughts came back to Captain San Wan's closing benediction. Thank You God. I sighed as I stood up and hugged all my brothers.
"I love you guys." I mumbled to each of them.
"We love you too." Sentury laughed, wrapping his arms around me and kissing the side of my face. "Now let's go find our lost brother!"
I will fear no evil thing. I said to myself while we headed down the hall, back up to the main corridor and the briefing rooms to see if the remainder of our crew had arrived. Sure enough, they had and they were patiently awaiting our return; complete with Lattes in hand.
"Oooh, I want one of those!" I snickered, making my best attempt to lift the pilot's.
"Get away from my coffee you creepy clone!" He snickered back as he carefully sheltered his mug, much the same way Katook had earlier today.
"You guys are way to predictable." Professor Drake shook his head.
"It's fun being a clone." The pilot retorted.
"Yeah, we get to annoy guys like you!" I grinned at the professor while he just let out a sigh of exasperation and walked away.
After a brief exchange of all necessary (and some unnecessary) pleasantries; we continued on to board the ship. We followed the engineers and mechanics through all the pre-flight checks before we took up positions in our assigned duties. We'd all done this in the flight simulator so many times; we could do it in our sleep. That was OK though. The mundaneness of all that training made the real thing worth it. I was looking forward to this trip actually. What was out there? What would we find? I smiled to myself as I flipped through my sequence of buttons and checks. Alright Lord. I quietly chuckled. Here I am - send me!
We lifted off, maneuvered out of the hanger and waited for clearance from ground control to hit the great unknown. We may have been on an important scientific endeavor; but we still had to wait our turn for take off. When we finally got the green light; we shot into space looking much like any other defense transport that was in a hurry to get somewhere.
After I'd done my part at programing navigation and checking the weapons systems, I took some time to look around the lodgings that would be our humble abode for the next few weeks. This ship was a typical class B transport flyer with a "few" modifications and a smaller crew compliment than was usual for this breed. That was fine with me though; gave us a bit more room. Not that clones really need more room; since we kind of pride ourselves in fitting into wee spaces others couldn't occupy without killing each other. A little bigger wee space was good too though. I chuckled while I logged in my mind all who were aboard.
I am Navigation programer and weapons system support.
Katook is tactical and shields monitor.
Japah: internal environmental and cloaking control.
Sentury is the co-pilot and in charge of the power cells.
Our pilot's name is Dart
Dr. Salichika is the mission's chief medical officer.
Professor Drake is the main engineer.
Our mechanical navigation engineer is a Savawarhian man named Troke.
Captain San Wan of course, is the mission's commanding officer.
And another Earth born human named Joel is in charge of everything else. Basically if it breaks, he's suppose to help fix it. If it is misplaced, he's suppose to put it away. If it's lost, he's suppose to find it. If it needs supplying, he's suppose to stock it. If it's dirty, he's suppose to clean it and if it's hungry, he's suppose to feed it. Poor guy, I certainly don't want his job!
It wasn't long before we were well outside of Aardat's orbit and the command for a full systems check commenced. That took about fifteen minutes and after Captain San Wan concurred with ground control; he gave the OK to engage the warp drive.
"Check." the various stations went down the list in response to the questions of our readiness. Lastly, we all dawned our protective face shields.
"Engage." Captain San Wan gave the command and within a microsecond we were in warped space.
I checked my navigational sensors and patiently waited for the next command. My task that was to follow, would be adjusting the coordinates to compensate for the trajectory the super warp would send us on. I looked up momentarily at the blur of pure light that enveloped the ship. Every window radiated a soft glow that made it seem like we were sitting in a faded photograph.
I always found that aspect of warp travel rather fascinating. Here is the closest we'd ever get in our own mortality to actually touching the light. It wasn't uncommon for people to get spooked by the iridescent glow that increasingly permeated the ship the faster you went. It made everything seem like you were going in slow motion. I always found it comforting though. My imagination liked to go wild with either images of Christ suddenly appearing on the bridge, or us mysteriously breaking the time eternity continuum and sliding right into the throne room of heaven. Oh the fantasies of a silly clone. I chuckled.
Well, we may not be too far from that reality. I began to muse as the series of orders came down in preparation for the jump to super warp. Either this is actually going to work, or I will be standing in the throne room of God! Honestly, I'd much rather it be the latter; but either way - I'm as ready as I'll ever be for the ride. I checked my screen and commenced with my sequence of duties. Japah was the last in the series.
"Well folks." I heard Captain San Wan's rather informal last command. "God speed!" He said. "Engage!"
"Uhh." I groaned as I tried to shake the fog out of my head. My brain felt like Jello.
"What happened?" I heard a mumble over my com-link.
"I don't know, but I got one hell of a headache." Came a response.
"Do you guys feel that?" Came another voice. "Are we dead?"
"Feel what?" I heard Professor Drake.
"No, you're not dead." The doctor answered.
"Than how come it feels like I got sucked into a black hole?" Came an inquire.
"Me too." I mumbled as I shook my head and my eyes began to come back into focus.
I popped the seal and pushed my helmet off. It tumbled out of my hands onto the deck. I glanced around at everyone in the ship. Every thing looked normal; but it certainly didn't feel normal.
"I think we landed at the bottom of some ocean!" Japah muttered. "Or at least that's what it seems like." He continued nearly sounding despairing. "The darkness... is suffocating."
"You guys must be feeling something we aren't." Dr. Salichika observed as she got up and grabbed a medical scanner. "You don't seem...different?" She puzzled. "Professor Drake, Joel: how do you feel?" She suddenly switched directions.
"Other than feeling a little rattled; I'm fine." The professor answered.
"Me too." Joel nodded.
"Must be something about the clones' DNA." The doctor concluded.
"Either that or we've entered the gates of hell!" Sentury sighed.