'Maybe I shouldn't do this…' The thought crossed my mind a few times, but I would always dismiss it. 'This is the only way I'll know how I truly feel.' Then I would think, 'What will he think?' Wait, he'll think it's himself, he won't know about the spell. Hopefully.' Another thought then entered my brain, 'This is selfish, it's what human men do to women. Is it still wrong if a woman does it to a man?' After I had finished the ritual, I went back into my living room, and waited. 'How does the spell work exactly?' The book wasn't very specific. I could feel his energy move back into the silo. Then, uncharacteristically, I started getting nervous. What should I expect? Shit, was I ready for this? I thought of ways to back out, but the option closed when he walked into the room.

There was this look in his eyes… I didn't like it. It definitely didn't help me stop shaking. I overdid some parts of the ritual, trying to make it a bit stronger, but I may have over done it. He walked up to me and slammed me up against the wall. That action would normally cause me to punch him out, but that look he had… He slammed his lips up against mine, and forced his tongue inside. 'My sweet little Kaioshin isn't even there, is he?' I thought. He ran one of his hands through my hair, and wrapped my arms around his back. He grabbed them, and pinned my wrists to the wall. He moved from lips to my neck, kissing and licking the skin. After I got over the shock of the way he was acting. I pushed away from the wall, I was still stronger than him, so he to back off a bit. He looked annoyed at being interrupted. I didn't say anything, and grabbed him by the hand and led him to my room. The way he was acting… It was so much like an animal. The spell seemed to give his body full control…

I opened my eyes, without the aid of an alarm clock this time. I looked over and saw it was 11:22 A.M. I looked beside me and there was Kaioshin lying beside me. He was so cute when he was sleeping. Then I remembered what happened, and what I did. 'Oh, shit.' I thought, wanting to jump out of that bed and away from him, but that might wake him up. I dreaded him waking up, oh crap I would never hear the end of it. It was much deeper than that. Out of all the people I knew, the Z Fighters, everyone in Other World, and even my father never trusted me. He did, little idiot. I mean, I'm a demon for crying out loud! There's no way he would ever trust me now, not after this. I used him. Is this considered rape, like my father did to my mother? The thought made me want to vomit. Our friendship, our millions of year's strong friendship, was now ruined. Could he ever forgive me? No, even if he did, every time he looks at me, he'll think of this. As carefully as I could I crept to my bathroom. I stood in front of the mirror; I hated the person I was looking at, 'what the hell is wrong with you?' Without thinking, I punched the mirror, shattering it. Oops. I turned towards the door; he had to be awake now. I quickly materialized some clothes on myself, in case he came in. I waited, I was terrified to leave the bathroom, I didn't want to face him. Would he know? Would he know that used magic to manipulate him? About 5 minutes went by, and then I heard, "Caspiel." He didn't sound angry, or confused like I expected. The way it sounded reminded me of the way my mother sounded when she knew I was lying, and I needed to tell the truth. 'Oh my god, he knows!' I slowly as I could, with my eyes locked on the floor, I walked back into the bedroom. I wouldn't look at him, I couldn't look at him. I stopped when I saw his red boots; I was about 6 feet away from him. I was terrified what he might say. The nausea hadn't gone away either.

"Why?" Is all he asked. How could I answer that question when I'm still trying figure it myself? I shrugged; I must have looked pathetic at that point. He took steps closer; I looked down at my feet. "Why won't you look at me?" "You've never done anything wrong; you don't know what it's like to be ashamed." I snapped. "You're more ashamed of this than when you helped Bibidi create Majin Buu, and became his apprentice?" Why isn't he angry? I was staring at my feet.

"You were not around."

"And?"

"You haven't figured it out yet? Out of all the people I've met, I've only cared about 2 people's opinions. If you were there, if you told me that was wrong," I looked in eyes, "If you gave me same look, I wouldn't have done it. I know I wouldn't have."

"You chased me away." The coldness in his voice was disturbing. When I saw him at the tournament I thought he sounded cold, and indifferent. He sounds almost dead now. It's all my fault.

"I knew your life would be better in Other World, away from me."

"Yet you still managed to take away what held dear."

"Don't you think if I could go back and change it I would? Don't you think I would change this?"

"If you regret it so much, why did you do it in the first place?" He said, with annoyance now in his eyes and voice.

"If I could go back, I would prevent myself from even being born; I couldn't exactly prevent that at the time! My mother was forced to leave her family when she was 16, and was murdered because of me! My friends have never needed me, I helped when I could but they could have managed without me. I'm just dead weight to them. I hurt the best friend I could ever ask for…" I was crying now, looking away. "I told you to let me die. You regret saving me now don't you?"

"Look at me."

I obeyed; I looked into his eyes. I've always thought he was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, now marred by violence, sorrow, anger and fear. The last bit of innocence he had I stole from him. He would have been so much better off without me.

"I don't expect you to forgive me, Kaioshin, but I'm sorry, for everything. What everyone in Other World always said is true, I'm just a demon. I can't change that. I'm evil. I was an idiot to think a Kai and demon could…" I trailed off. I knew now my feelings were not just lust. I loved him. That didn't make a difference now.

He started walking towards the hall, towards the exit. He stopped and said, "I won't be coming back to Earth, and if you come to Other World, you're not welcome on my planet."

I listened as he exited my home. His words hung in the hair, ripping my heart to pieces. More tears ran down my face, I wanted to scream, but I couldn't speak, or even think. His words replayed in my head like a broken record player.