Chapter Four: Two Hearts

Coruscant~40 ABY

Kyp Durron felt apprehensive as the lights of the city planet appeared before his ship. Ten years of intensive rebuilding had brought the planet back to the level the former galactic metropolis once held and the beings of this urban world moved about their business oblivious to the impeding conflict. Perhaps, only the Corellians could guess how close the Galactic Alliance was to war. Would the beings of the galaxy have the energy to face another battle? He hoped it would not escalate to that point, but he was not naïve. The Alliance had been on the edge since it's inception and was as frail as the New Republic before it. Where was the democracy Luke's generation had fought for, the ideal his parents had died for? How he longed to know what their opinion would have been given the current situation.

It wasn't just worries over war which plagued him, in fact, it was the wonder of how one younger Jedi knight would receive his older brother that vied for prominence in his mind. The Jedi Master arrived in Coruscant ambivalent about resuming his duties. He'd felt remiss in following the events of the building galactic crisis, but for some reason he didn't seem to feel the urgency he once would have. An urgency that once pitted him against Luke Skywalker. Instead he had indulged his time in discovery of a past he had forgotten and never known. Weeks of wondering of his mother's fate had come to an end, but instead of being able to put closure to the situation he had opened up another. For days he had considered what to do. He was the lone person in the galaxy with this information and he could take it with him to his death. Was this what the Force wanted? Hardly…he hadn't had the dream of his mother for no reason. He knew it was what she wanted. That brilliant beautiful girl who followed her idealistic lover and died a slave.

After securing his ship he located his yellow air speeder in the car park where he had left it one week before. It's engines came to life and he relished the feel of it's power in his hands. He'd always liked speed and this new speeder did not disappoint. He had sacrificed plenty in his life and he had earned this small indulgence of vanity. While he flew back to the Jedi Temple his thoughts drifted to Zekk. He had imagined a dozen scenarios on the flight back from Ennth. Some went well and others did not, he thought it best to plan for contingencies. But he had made up his mind, he would tell Zekk they were brothers.

So this will be in your honor mother. He kissed the small dutiki stone he had purchased on Ennth. It's polished emerald surface felt cold in his hand yet soothing. The weathered tradeswoman who sold it to him stated it came from the volcanic rock of the planet's many explosions and was known for its healing properties. Keeping one in your pocket could save you from danger she warned him. He had resisted replying , "so can my light saber." She was too serious for him to wound with his cynicism.

He had chosen the green stone because it's color was reminiscent of the link he shared with them, his mother, Zeth, himself, and the baby brother he never knew he had, Zekk. In your memory mother, I will tell him. I will tell him who you were and how much you would have loved him. I wish it could have been different for you, at the end.

With all this heavy on his mind, Kyp had the Masters' secretary set an appointment with Jedi Zekk for the following week. He wasn't ready to confront the younger man with this new information. He had spent the previous four days trying to decide what words he would choose to tell the fellow orphan he had family alive after all.

He decided he'd think about this upcoming discussion further at the workout facility; he wasn't even certain he was over the shock of discovering the man he'd worked with for years was his brother. What he really wanted was someone he could talk to about his mother. Sharing with Han had been exciting, but nothing compared to having a living relative.

Kyp stopped in the doorway of the workout room, there on treadmill was the object of his mental angst. Zekk did not break pace but gave a slight nod to Kyp as he entered. His Force presence as vibrant as ever and now, with the knowledge Kyp held, a little familiar. He was not surprised to see Kyp. Both men were no strangers to the center, though they seldom conversed while together. Kyp decided he might as well attempt to be friendly. He took the tread mill next to Zekk's and set a pace matching the younger Jedi.

"I just set an appointment to meet you next week. I didn't know you'd returned from your mission. I see you've been gone awhile, how was it?"

"It yielded some surprising results. Actually it's this mission I need to talk to you about." Now Durron, there will never be a better opening than this. "Ever feel the Force is pushing you along, guiding you?"

"Of course, all the time." Zekk kept his pace steady, his eyes forward.

"A few weeks ago I had this dream about my parents. When I woke up I felt like my mother was trying to reach me. I can't explain it. It's not like that usually for me. I don't get visions, but the feeling was so compelling I went to Deyer, where I grew up, and I learned some things about my family."

"I'm sorry Master, but what does this have to do with me?" Zekk was perplexed, outwardly he was respecting, but inward he was irritated, what did Durron want?

"I want you to look at me, I want you to look deeply into my eyes." Zekk shot Kyp a look of disgust, and a feeling of repulsion waved from him. "No, I don't mean that way. Here, stop." Kyp jumped off his treadmill and motioned for Zekk to follow him to the full length mirrors which lined the center. "I'm not trying to seduce you, and after what I have to say you'll know why. Look at our features, especially our eyes and foreheads." Zekk complied and spent a few minutes intently examining the Jedi Master's face.

"I think I know where this is headed. A few nights ago I had a strange dream. You were standing on Ennth, in the center of the city. The dream faded as quickly as it came, and I thought nothing of it until now. Why were you on Ennth?" He turned away from the mirror to peer intently into Kyp's eyes.

"I was researching my mother. She didn't die at Kessel. She was sold into slavery and she ended up on Ennth, which is where I also learned she died a few years later."

"But what does that have to do with me, and , uh, oh.." Zekk stopped speaking and a icy chill waved through his body as everything became clear. His mouth remained open as Kyp delivered the news.

"Muriel Durron died in 7 ABY shortly after giving birth to a baby boy," he paused as if gathering courage to go on, "she had nothing to give him but his name, Zekk."

Zekk's face contorted with pain and outrage. "Why are you telling me this? Why are you trying to create a relationship? You had a brother, and you killed him. I will not be his replacement. Or anyone's second best. I did not need to know this information. I had parents, they died when I was nine. Now you tell me that's a lie! So who's my father? Some kriffin slaver? Kriff you, Kyp Durron." Without even using the Force, Zekk slammed Kyp out of his way and stormed from the room.

Kyp stood silently, all his energy had drained from his body. He sat on the nearest bench, dry eyed, but disappointed and blew out a long breath. He had wanted this revelation to go more smoothly. He had hoped Zekk would be pleased with the information. He muttered into the air. "Please mom, please reach Zekk and let him know I didn't mean to hurt him. Please?" He calmed himself by breathing and decided to complete his workout. He always thought best in motion.

DDD

Zekk reached his quarters without even being aware of the strange looks others in the Temple corridors gave him. He nearly ripped his door off it's track impatiently keying in the code. Once inside, he let out a scream of frustration, followed by curses worthy of any Hutt and several mutterings about what he would do to Durron if he crossed his path. Then Zekk stood silently. He breathed deeply and let the Force flow through him. He was angry and he did not want that anger to develop into something more dark or violent. He needed to think this through. Who was he angry at, Kyp? His parents? The woman named Muriel whom he just discovered to be his mother or the mystery man who was his father? Who? Only Kyp remained to take his frustrations out on and Kyp really wasn't to blame. He had only wanted to know more about his mother, Zekk knew that feeling well. Kyp had stumbled upon the connection to Zekk, or was it not a mistake. Zekk closed his eyes, was the Force responsible for guiding Kyp to the information? Were they suppose to discover this relationship? He found himself reaching out, imploring a woman he never knew. Oh Muriel, please what am I to do?

With his thoughts and feelings so raw within the Force, Zekk keenly felt a touch of comfort like a breeze blowing across the fine hairs on his arm. He shivered as if cold as he sat on the large cushion he used for meditation. After less than half an hour submerged in the Force he found he could not control the emotions building in him and he gave into them pounding the meditating cushion repeatedly and despite his cursing, his eyes remained dry. Physically relieved, he reentered a state of calm and felt the Force wash over him carrying his anger away.

Some time later Zekk had pondered all which Kyp had told him. He had passed through self pity over not having an average childhood to the anger which came with only knowing partial truths about his lineage to feeling badly that he had been angry at Kyp. Once he became focused he realized there was no one alive to blame, just two lonely men trying to find answers to a complicated past. A past which had left both of them vulnerable to fear, anger and the dark side.

Why did he dislike Kyp? He knew he had since early in the Vong War. Kyp always argued with Master Skywalker. Kyp was too arrogant and not remorseful. His ideas had nearly split the order. Zekk thought he had the right level of respect and regret for his dark side acts, but Durron acted as if nothing had ever happened and that he was immune to its call. And when he was still a teen that call was fresh in his heart; for him to be anywhere near someone as potent as Durron, may have lured him away from the light. So he had avoided him and over time he had grown strong in his own beliefs regarding the Force.

Hapes had been the last straw. When he had seen Jaina spiral out of control on the Yuuzhan Vong worldship he was frightened. He had grown resistant to the dark side by avoiding aggression and aggressors, but he wasn't so sure he could help her face her own darkness. Then she had told him she was apprenticed to the questionable Jedi. That was too much. He'd felt he'd lost all control of her then and in his own scramble for clarity after the debacle that was Myrkr the last thing he needed was her dragging him into the abyss. No, let her go to Durron.

Of course, strangely, Kyp Durron proved himself to truly be a Jedi Master and single handedly brought Jaina back from the darkness. No, neither were dark anymore then he was. Over time he had slowly began to respect Kyp and had decided to call him Master Durron as a way to honor him after Kyp had supported his and Jaina's decision to assist the Killiks in their crisis.

Until today, he didn't dislike Kyp anymore, rather he felt indifferent towards him. But now, it was as if he, he hesitated to admit it to himself, it was as if he could no longer hide behind indifference. No, he now actually had to face his feelings for the older Jedi. Feelings that were complicated and mixed. One feeling pressed itself to the surface of the tumult of ideas racing in his head, understanding, and with that feeling rose the need to apologize. Force, both of them had such similar and painful loses early in life. They might actually understand each other if given the chance.

DDD

Kyp had spent the first few days back from his trip studying new information regarding Corellia. There was worry that the fiercely independent planet would lead secession from the GA. Skywalker had been in meetings with Omas daily, but shared little information with the rest of the Order. This also worried Kyp. It wasn't how Jedi business was done. His thoughts were mired in the details of a report sent from Chandrila when the secretary announced Zekk.

The tall Jedi stepped into Kyp's office quietly. "I've come to talk. I was rude the other day, I guess I was in shock."

"Think nothing of it. I sprung that on you. It's taken me time to think about this too."

"I guess I'm not exactly ready to hear what you have to tell me."

"I'll…" He was interrupted by an urgent message from his secretary.

"Master Skywalker needs to see you immediately in his office."

"I'm sorry Zekk. I have to go. I do want to talk to you. Soon, when you want to."

Zekk paused in the doorway. "I just want you to know. I'm not angry at you." He turned back to look at Kyp. "I just need time to think about all of this, okay?"

Looking uncharacteristically serene, his older brother smiled. "Take all the time you want."

DDD

Four days later Zekk sat in Kyp's office looking less than comfortable despite the many offerings of beverages and food Kyp tried on him. Finally the Master offered him nothing but a story. "Want to hear about your mother?"

"I always thought my parents were the people who raised me." Zekk looked despondent. He focused his gaze on his folded hands in his lap.

"They were. My mother was certainly you're birth mother, but she is not the one who raised you." He hesitated. "But I'm sure she loved you as she carried you."

"Or did she wish she was dead?"

"Zekk, no, my mother loved life and children, when I was 6 she miscarried a baby, I remember how hard she took it, no she would have loved you from the moment she knew you existed. And I'm sure she knew immediately."

"You think because she must have been Force sensitive?"

"I'm guessing. I can't remember anything from my childhood that would point to either parent being Force sensitive, but it was Imperial times and it wasn't something you wanted to share. But since we both are, I'm guessing we inherited it from her even if she didn't know. Plus, I keep feeling these- how do I say it- nudges to lead me along. I thought they were from Zeth, but now I'm not so sure."

Kyp had never spoken more than a few words to Zekk at any time and now he found himself wanting to share his most intimate thoughts, however, Zekk appeared indifferent…impatient. Finally after an eternity of silence he asked. "So what was she like?"

"Look, this is her graduation picture from the Academy on Denon, dark hair and green eyes, guess we got that from her." Kyp couldn't keep the excitement from his voice, to be able to share his mother with someone and to know he was actually related to this person was like a dream. "She was only sixteen here. I don't have any holos from Deyer. I have no bad memories of her you know?"

"I'm sure she was lovely." Zekk added somewhat detached.

"I remember a happy person who loved to dance and sing. She never spoke of the Force, just of love and the energy of that love which bound us together. She use to have to comfort me a lot, I was always crying as a child. When she had the miscarriage she got pretty depressed, as did I. I remember we'd sit together for hours holding hands. One night we watched the stars and she said Zinnah, my little sister who never was born, was watching us and waiting. She made me believe the stars were the spirits of the departed. When I was under ground in Kessel I couldn't see the stars and I felt cut off because I thought no one would be able to watch over me." Kyp paused and drew a deep calming breath. He looked directly at Zekk, who, for the first time had lost the agitated look of self-protection he'd worn since Kyp's revelation. Kyp sipped his caf before adding for Zekk's benefit. "Mom liked z names, and named Zeth and the baby she lost and you that way, but my dad named me, he said it was a modern name for a modern era…silly isn't it? Mom said she liked old fashioned names with meaning." Kyp found the less Zekk talked the more he began to babble. However at least Zekk stayed in the office rather than running away in anger. It was a start.

The younger Jedi scratched absently at his face. "Did she get over loosing the baby?"

"Oh, yes, she was an optimistic person, and now that I look back on it, I think she realized her mood was directly affecting mine. Even when we were at Kessel, all she talked about was how we would go home soon and how we would reunite with Zeth. She tried to keep the mood light, even though our plight was hopeless. She and I spent our time trying to plan parties we would hold once we were all united. Because I was little they allowed me to sleep with her and every night we'd find peace talking about the future. Sometimes she would tell me what I would be like as a man…" His voice drifted off and he stood quickly and went to the wide transparisteel that flanked the room. His back was turned as if he could hide his emotions from the younger Jedi, "I worry she lost hope…and died alone."

This seemed to have affected the younger man, but perhaps not in the manner Kyp would have desired. Zekk's voice was barely above a whisper when he finally spoke. "I feel responsible for her death."

Kyp continued to stare at Coruscant's skyline. "Don't talk that way, none of this was in your control..."

"But I feel like I took your mother away." He shook his head. "It would have been nice to know her, but I never met her, so it's a little hard to mourn her on a personal level like you do. But I know how I felt when the parents who raised me died on Ennth. I'm really sorry Kyp." Kyp didn't feel any genuine compassion from his younger brother and that bore into him in a manner he was unaccustomed to, like ice cold water flowing through his veins.

"Why have you never liked me?" Kyp spun around; he gave a penetrating gaze with his shiny, dark eyes. There was a long pause during which Zekk let his thoughts float too close to the edge of his consciousness. Kyp grasped them in surprise. "Resentment? Why?"

"What we both did is unforgivable!

"No, it is not! Inexcusable…but you must forgive yourself, it is past."

"There it is, right there!" He pointed his finger accusingly. "You think you can just walk away from your past and say no regrets. You think your good deeds will make up for all the evil you've done. Well, I don't think it works that way."

"How does it work then, because that's all we can do."

"That's where we differ Kyp, it's arrogant to believe that it's all we can do."

"Arrogant no, realistic. We can't …"

Zekk cut him off, "From your point of view."

"From Master Skywalker's point of view."

"So now you are arrogant enough to quote him, you always thought you were better than him."

"No wonder why you can't relate to what I am sharing with you. And I thought you might listen, I thought you might like the idea of having a living relative. Well at least the Sabacc deck has been dealt." Kyp resisted the urge to leave the room, after all, it was his office; so he sat heavily in his desk chair. "I was unaware you harbored such resentment towards me."

"You were unaware I existed until it suited your needs. Where were you when I fell to the dark side, sure you helped Jaina, was it because you were in love with her? Because she was a female, or because she was Han's daughter? Where were you for me?"

"Zekk, by the time I knew you had gone to the Shadow Academy Jaina had helped you back. I'm sorry I wasn't there right after wards, but maybe like you felt on Hapes when you saw her fall, maybe I didn't know what to do."

"Or maybe you didn't care." The door slid open with the Force and Kyp sat staring at the empty portal where his brother had just stood.