urgh, think i've been gone long enough? i'm sorry. my creative brainwaves are just not functioning anymore. i am SO sorry. if you're still reading this, i'm impressed. on the plus side, i think you'll like the chapter, if you're still reading.

if Grey's Anatomy was mine, i would be a whole lot richer than i am.

I don't know that I would call our first date a particular success, per say. I mean, it wasn't the worst date ever, but there wasn't anything really extraordinary about it either. We just grabbed drinks and something to eat and then he took me home. He didn't stay, if that's what you were wondering. It was the smart thing to do. I mean, come on, we've slept together and look how that turned out. I, for one, would not have to go through that again. In case you haven't noticed, plane tickets are expensive. Plus, I just don't feel like another trip down to L.A. And okay, so maybe that has more to do with the Pete factor than the money factor, but still. I just don't want to go through it again.

Anyways, the first date was good. Just good. It left me debating whether this whole thing was really worth it or not. That is, until our second date.

I'm studying a chart, leaning against the nurses' station when he approaches me. He leans in, probably a little closer than he should have, but not an indecent distance. Then he says quietly, "So that whole date thing, not so great."

I feel my heart sink in my chest, preparing itself to break. I can already hear the splintering when he continues. "I'm thinking you should let me prove I can do better than that tomorrow night." Rewind that splintering noise.

I smile and try not to let him know how scared I was. Even if the date was mediocre, honestly, I'd rather go on a hundred mediocre dates with him than on one really good one with someone else, that's how pathetic I am. "If you insist," I reply. "But why tomorrow?"

He leans in closer. Okay, now that really is an indecent distance, and I am freaking incapable of doing anything about it. "Because I haven't figured you out yet. But don't worry I will," he says quietly. I resist the urge to swoon.

I smirk to cover up my shaking knees. "Yeah, good luck with that."

Same distance, same cocky smirk, same party going on in my chest and stomach. "I'm up to the challenge." I hear my breath catch, and think that damn it, I'm never going to hear the end of it. He opens his mouth like he's going to say something, but then just turns and walks away.

When I'm sure he's out of sight, I all but collapse, using the nurses' station to prop myself up so I look like I'm standing semi-normally and that my knees aren't about to give out.

--

Even though I love getting Addison all hot and bothered, there is a problem with it. I have to live up to those expectations. And now I have to come up with some date idea that shows that I've managed to at least sort of figure her out. I think about it throughout the day, but can't come up with anything. And that night too. I get nothing. And she's not exactly helping, purposefully avoiding me and all. Even when we're in the same room, she doesn't give anything away. Which is seriously annoying. But whatever.

My answer comes to me just after rounds. We're checking on a woman with ovarian cancer. She has a seven year old daughter and she's a single parent. While we're in the room it becomes clear that even though the woman, Mrs. Miller, loves her daughter, Grace, Grace is Mrs. Miller's caretaker, in her own seven year old way.

"Mommy, do you want some water or something?" Grace asks.

"No, sweetie, I'm good."

"Are you sure?" Big, blue saucer eyes come into play. She clearly wants to do something.

Mrs. Miller looks at us and then at her daughter. "A glass of water would be great, sweetie. Thank you." She looks back at us. "Is that all?"

I look to Addison, who seems flustered. "Oh, um, yeah. Sure. Um, yeah. I'll be, um we'll be back later." She tucks a piece of hair behind her ear and pretty much flees the room.

I find her leaning against the wall opposite the door. "You okay?"

She swallows and tries to hide the fact that she's has tears in her eyes. "It's just… it's not fair, you know? Childhood should be like… swings."

"Swings?"

She looks at me. "Does anything make you feel better than swings? I mean, there's nothing else in the world that makes you feel freer, if you close your eyes. And that's how childhood should be. If you don't look close enough, absolutely free, but if you pay attention you have the safety that you need. And I bet that Grace hasn't been on the swings in years."

I don't know what to say. There's nothing that you can say to that. I look around. The hallway's relatively empty so I hug her. I can feel her think about resisting, but then decides not to.

It sounds selfish, but at least I finally got an idea.

--

I wait in the lobby for Alex to show up. I have to admit, I'm pretty excited to see what he's decided to do, since he built it up so much. And I have to admit, I'm puzzle when I see him approach with Grace Miller. "Hi Grace," I say after a moment for processing.

"Hi Dr. Montgomery."

"Hi Alex." I'm trying to send him a question with my eyes, and it must be tangled with three others or something, because he answers one of them, but not exactly well. "Is it cool if she comes with us?" he asks.

"Uh… sure." I mean, it's not like I can say no.

"Cool."

"Um, why?"

"That's a surprise." Well, I do like surprises.

I'm especially surprised when he pulls up in front of what appears to be a dark expanse of grass. "What are we doing here?" I ask warily.

"Come on," he replies. "You'll see."

Grace giggles. "Yeah, come on, Dr. Montgomery." Oh great, she's in on the joke too? I feel left out.

"Addison," I tell her. I don't know if it's just because Dr. Montgomery sounds too long for a seven year old to say, or because I just really want her to call me Addison.

"Okay. Race ya, Addison!" she yells and takes off. Alex nudges me and I take off after her.

There's a subtle corner that I turn to reveal a well-lit play structure, complete with teeter-totter, slide, and swings. There's even a tire swing, which Grace is struggling to get on to. I laugh and help her up. After spinning her, I turn, breathing heavily and find Alex waiting, holding a grocery bag. I almost skip over, I'm so giddy. "What's in the bag?" I ask.

"Food," he answers with a smile. "Hungry?"

I smile back. "I don't know. I think I want to go on the swings." Okay, strange impulse, I know, but I just really want to go on the swings. I walk over and puts the bag down to come join me. We swing for a couple minutes and Grace comes to join us. I start slowing down and Grace asks me to push her. And I can't say no. Alex watches, smiling. That goes on for a couple more minutes, until Grace announces that she's hungry. We return to the grocery bag, where Alex starts pulling out sandwiches. He hands me a turkey, my absolute favorite. I know that he's seen me eat it several hundred times, so I'm not exactly mystified as to how he knows, but it's sweet that he remembered. Then he pulls out a peanut butter and banana sandwich for Grace and another sandwich for himself. I never know what's in his sandwich, he never tells me.

We sit on a bench and eat, Grace faster than us and she goes to play on the play ground some more. "I promised her we'd go out for ice cream later," he announces.

I turn to face him. "You brought me on a date to let me take her on the swings, didn't you?" I inquire. He shrugs. "How'd you manage all this in so short a time."

"A good magician never reveals his tricks," he replies. "Besides," he continues. "You're cute when you pout."

I glare at him. "Not fair. I deserve to know."

He laughs. "Not really. Just sit back and enjoy it, Addie."

I sigh. "It is kind of perfect," I admit. Then I smile. "Aside from the not knowing how you pulled it off part."

"I'm not going to tell you," he informs me.

"I know. But a girl can try, can't she?"

"Sure," he says.

I lean in and kiss him. "Now?" I ask.

"No."

I kiss him again. "Now?"

"No."

And again. "Now?"

He smiles. "No."

I smile back. "I'll get it out of you one way or another, Karev, you wait."

He smirks. "Looking forward to it."

"Addison!" Grace calls. "D'ya think you could push me on the swings again?"

I grin. "Sure. Hang on a second." I turn back to Alex and kiss him. "I know it's not over, but thank you for tonight. It's been perfect."

He's still smirking when I walk away.

so even though it's been ages, i would love you if you'd review!

Lauren