Here's Chapter three.
The looks on John and Mary's face when they got home were like a stab to the chest. Somehow I knew we were screwed somehow. They wouldn't talk to us about it, just said they'd explain everything later and told us not to worry. Sam was terrified, he asked me after dinner was over if we where gonna have to leave again. I had no idea what to say so I just told him we'd be alright. Maybe that's how John and Mary feel, avoiding telling us the truth because they don't know. Whatever it is it had them on edge, therefor I was on edge.
I spit the left over tooth past into the sink before rinsing my mouth out. Tonight I was gonna sleep, besides Sam had already caught me sneaking out twice. I had been going over to the old barn behind Danny's house, we'd sit up there and just look at the stars and talk. With anyone else that would be a major chick flick moment, but with Danny maybe chick flick moments aren't so bad.
I really didn't want to leave this place, not Danny or John and Mary. Ive been a pain and I knew it. Gareth had it coming when I broke his wrist, but fighting with other kids and messing with my teachers. I needed to stop, I just.. couldn't. Some stuff I haven't even been caught doing yet. Like sneaking a few beers under the bleachers. Never enough to get drunk but just enough to get a good buzz to keep me going. I tried cigarettes but they were disgusting and I put a stop to that right away.
In the bed room all three of us still shared I crawled into the bottom bunk, listening to Sam move around above me. Another thing I liked was how safe Sam was now. I still freaked out some times, like with the hugging stuff. But Sam eat it up, he loved attention and I was happy to let them give it to him.
"Dean?", Sam asked.
"Yeah bud", I mumbled, pulling the covers up over my chest.
""What was Mom and Dad like", He asked quietly.
My heart stopped. He used to ask when he was little, just little questions. I'd tell him Dad left and Mom died, simple. But now he's older and wants to know more. "Who first", I answered.
"Mom..".
"She had, blond hair and green eyes. She liked to sing and cut the crusts off my sandwichs. She liked to watch scary movies when she thought I was asleep.. I can't remember anymore", I said quietly. My voice hurt, Mom made it do that.
"What about Dad", He asked again a bit more hesitantly.
My eyes became wet, I ruffly wiped the tears away. No reason to cry.
"He liked to watch football.. and watch Rocky movies. He used to hide behind your crib and then jump up and scare the crap out of you.. Mom used to get so mad at him", I laughed, I miss before. I miss how it was before mom died.
"What was it like... after Mom but before Dad..", he asked slowly.
"He was angry. He wasn't the same. He couldn't do it, I asked to many questions and he snapped", I said. It was my fault, If I had just done what I was told and shut my mouth.
"Am I asking to many questions", He whispered.
"No. Sam no. You can ask me anything", I stated firmly. Sam was never gonna be scared of me, that's a promise I can keep.
"Did Dad like me", he asked.
"...Yeah, He loved you".
"Then why would he leave".
"He was scared", I answered.
"Like you were".
Then Cas came in and turned out the light, climbing into his bed.
The next morning John and Mary were acting like nothing had ever happened. They were hiding something from us and I wanted to know. Then what Sam said last night, I didn't want to be like my Dad, I used to before I knew better, but now I guess the apple doesn't fall to far from the tree. I thought about it through the entire school day. My mind constantly wondering. I got yelled at twice for getting distracted. I watched Cas get on the bus, he had wanted me to ride with him but I needed to walk. Cas knew when I wanted to walk I wanted to think and he didn't fight me on it.
I ended up like normal under the bleachers.
Beer tastes like crap, that much If found out. But I guess people don't drink it for the taste. I sit there, where its shady and cool. The first time I drank it I was out here with a few other kids, now I just do it by myself. John keeps them in his garage, he never misses just a few. The first time I threw up, just for the taste alone, some other kid did to so I didn't feel as bad. I've never been drunk, just buzzed.
It was then when I noticed it, some guy watching me, he stood at the very edge of the field, just staring. Perve came to mind, or he was gonna rat me out. I got out of there fast, the last thing John and Mary needed was for the school to call my social worker.
I was walking out of the school building when I noticed it, the feeling. I turned around and saw nothing. I couldn't shake it though.
"Hello?"I yelled, there was no one out here. The kids had cleared out awhile ago and I've just been fooling around.
"Dude.. I know your there I saw you earlier", I yelled. Nobody showed there face. And like a normal person who'd seen way to many episodes of 48 hours, I ran home as fast as I could.
I ran until I was on the front porch.
"Where were you", was the first question asked as soon as I opened the door. I sighed, raked a hand down my face. I hoped to god they couldn't tell. I had no idea if they could smell it on me or what? They haven't found out yet and that's good enough for me. I wasn't scared of John or Mary anymore, but I didn't want to screw things up again. I didn't want them to be mad or disappointed in me. Yeah, If I want that I probably a sign I shouldn't drink, but its not that much and.. it helps. When school sucks I go out to the bleachers and I drink, when I have nightmares I go to the garage and I drink. But Iv NEVER been drunk.
"I took the long way home", I answered heading to the kitchen. Mary followed behind me. I opened up the fridge grabbing the sandwich I left over from last night.
"Dean you have a phone why didn't you call me", She said loudly.
"I told Cas where I was going", I defended sitting down at the table and talking a bite out of my sandwich.
"Cas said you'd have been home an hour ago, Dean. I panicked", She snapped. I flinched a little at her tone, she calmed down and took a few breaths. "Please, Please call me if your going walk home understand", She asked. I nodded glumly, I felt really bad now, I was going behind there backs and being a screw up and they were trying there hardest to fix me. Plus there was whatever had happened at the social workers office. When Mary left I flicked myslef in the forehead. That's for being stupid.
So Dean is on a bad track, sorta like in the show (Cries). I've only ever had a small sip of alcohol before and.. it sucked. Then once more when I accidentally got a hold of a grown up drink at a football game party when I was seven.. So I hope I got that right.