A/N: Sorry for the late update. As usual, school is killing me. No need to go into that though.

Hope you like the chapter, it's kind of important…sets the scene for later chapters. Some of you might think its a filler, but its not. This chapter took me a long time to write. I rewrote it like…3 times. It was horrible, I wanted to end this story…but yeah, that wouldn't be worth it.

So I hope it's alright, I personally don't like it, but hopefully some of you will.

Review if you want.

Enjoy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I would've liked to say it was impossible. But I would be lying through my teeth. I would've liked to say it wasn't impossible. But I would by lying to you all. I would like you to understand me. But that's impossible, yet it's possible. And look now, see now. I'm lying once again.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Buttery popcorn, headphones and papers. An odd combination, but one both were used to. He was used to her popcorn addiction, and she was used to his dedication to work.

They were close friends; they had known each other for about four years. They both considered the other as a friend and nothing more. She was almost always hanging out with him for they did almost everything together. He was like the brother she never had and she was the confidence that he needed in his life.

Both knew relationships were complicated. They took time; they were often hard and stressful. But their relationship was different. It was peaceful and comfortable. Neither was pressured to confide anything in the other, yet they did so anyway.

It was simple. Simple was how they liked it.

"This is new?" She asked, picking up one of his papers.

"Yeah, but I don't like it." He answered, pulling off his headphones. "It's kind of boring."

"Let me hear it." She said simply, putting down her bowl of popcorn and then hopping over to grab a violin case.

"It's nothing, really." He said frowning. He wasn't confident about the piece. He never was.

"Shut up and play." She said in response, shoving the case into the man's arms.

He nodded. He never challenged her. Taking the beautiful instrument out of the case he looked down onto the paper and began playing the soft quiet melody he had written.

The woman smiled and played with a piece of her hair as she listened to the quiet piece of composition. She could hear the hesitation in the notes yet the slight hint of confidence. It made her smile widen. Confidence was good.

The song was beautiful, almost like a lullaby. The man had raw talent for composition; it just came easy for him. The woman knew several students at the creative arts college the man attended who were also into composition. None of them came close to the amount of excellence the man had in the field. Not only could he compose, but he played two classical instruments exceptionally. And to think he'd only picked it up a few years ago.

"Well that's it." The man said, looking up after abruptly stopping the song. "I don't know…I don't really like it. What do you think?" He asked, searching the woman's eyes.

"I think it's beautiful, Riku. Keep it. It's special." She said, placing the piece into one of Riku's folders.

Riku smiled, albeit a very tiny one. "Thanks…I guess I will." He answered after a few seconds. Picking up some scattered papers he stood up. "You have any ideas for dinner, Yuffie."

At this Yuffie jumped up excitedly, regaining her hyper personality. "Um…ooh, I don't know…oh yeah, make pizza!"

Riku chuckled and ran a hand through his long silver hair. He hadn't cut it since he moved away from the islands. It was now down to his mid-back and he usually kept it in a pony tail to keep it out of his face.

"We have that every time you're here, Yuf."

"Yeah I know, but who cares?" The raven haired woman said, walking into the large extremely clean kitchen.

"Sora." Riku said, opening the refrigerator to locate the needed ingredients for Yuffies dinner wish. He wouldn't deny the request on his life. He hated saying no to people he cared for.

"Who the hell cares about what he wants?" The woman said, rolling his eyes. "That crazy thing…" she muttered.

Riku only raised his eyebrows in amusement. Yuffie and Sora didn't exactly get along. They always argued with one another. Riku knew that deep down they bother enjoyed it, but they would never admit to it.

"What do you want on it?" Riku asked, pulling ingredients out of the fridge. Sora had stocked up on groceries the day before so they had about anything you could think of inside the large silver fridge.

"Pepperoni's, olives, mushrooms, those little fishy thingies, bacon...and um…cheese."

Riku smiled a little bit at this. "Cheese is a necessity, Yuffie. And no fish, Sora will kill me."

"Oh come on? I love those little baby fishies!" Yuffie exclaimed, frowning. "But yeah whatever…fine."

Riku was about to relent and let her have the fish when a door was heard from the entryway of the pent-house.

"Why is it so quiet in here?" Came a voice from the front room. "Riku where are ya?"

"In here." Riku said in reply to the voice.

"Man, are you cooking something? 'Cause I'm starved." Sora said walking into the kitchen. He threw his messenger bag on the island and leaned over the granite counter to see what he was making.

"Duke, please don't tell me you're going to put fish on this…please." He said eyeing the raven haired girl.

"Um…no, I'm not. I'm not putting pineapple on it either, so don't ask." Riku said, kneading the homemade dough. Sora frowned at this, and glared at the raven haired woman.

Turning back to look at Riku, Sora chuckled and then smirked. "God you look like a woman..."

Riku blushed and stopped his actions. "Excuse me?"

Sora chuckled once again and plopped himself down in one of the island chairs next to Yuffie.

"I don't know man, this whole cooking thing…"

"Sora shut your damn mouth. You look like a pregnant soccer mom when you clean the house like a crazed psycho." Yuffie said, punching him in the arm.

"Hands of the King, woman." Sora said, shoving her back.

Riku rolled his eyes as Yuffie punched Sora once again, knocking the brunette to the floor. He ignored them and proceeded to finish making the pizza before Sora could put in another comment.

A few seconds after he finished, the doorbell rang.

"Hey could one of you get that?" Riku asked, peeking into the living room where Sora and Yuffie were busy throwing popcorn, DVDs, video game controllers and pillows at each other. Both of the arguing adults ignored him and continued to act like young children on the playground.

Riku rolled his eyes and walked passed them towards the hallway that lead to the living room. Upon reaching the door, he wiped his hands on the side of his jeans and put on a friendly face.

Riku opened the door and then gave a small smile to the person in front of him. "Hey Olette, what's up?" He asked, opening the door wider so she could step inside.

"Oh nothing um, Sora forgot some stuff. The boss said he wanted some files filed before tonight…and well I didn't want him to get in trouble and all, so I kind of

brought them..." She said nervously, glancing up at the silver haired man before looking back down, embarrassed.

"Hey, no problem. Sora'll be happy about this. You want me to give them to him, or do you want to give them to him yourself? Oh and you're welcome to stick around if you want." Riku said, trying to ease her nervousness. He knew that the woman was madly in love with Sora. In Riku's opinion, Olette would be really good for Sora. But that was only Riku's opinion.

"Um…I…" She started, as if deciding what she should do.

"Come on in, really. We're having homemade pizza, it has some interesting toppings, but it should be alright." Riku said, ushering her into the hallway that lead to the family room.

Upon entering the family room, Riku let out an embarrassed sigh. The room was in shambles. Popcorn littered the floor; DVD cases were open with their DVD's scattered over the couches. Pillows lay in odd places; one was even sitting in the unlit fireplace.

"Olette! Hey and Hello!" Sora said from one of the couches. "You're just in time for chow." He said, giving her a grin. Olette smiled back and felt the pressure and nervousness lift from her shoulders. Sora didn't seem unnerved with her being here. In fact, he seemed perfectly all right with it.

"Olette, this is my friend Yuffie. Yuffie, this is Olette." Riku said, nodding in Yuffie's direction. Yuffie had a towel on her head and was busy rubbing it back and forth over her soaking hair. It was then that Riku noticed the bucket in Sora's arms. He grimaced when he noted the familiar lime green color. The lime bucket was the mop bucket. All the floors were washed using water from that bucket. Riku hadn't yet emptied the bucket from earlier use and knew that it was filthy water that was coating Yuffies shiny black hair. He instantly felt extreme pity for her, but was humored nonetheless by her appearance.

"Nice to meet you." Olette said, smiling in the girl's direction. Yuffie smiled back and then frowned as she pulled the soaking towel away from her hair. "Right back at you." She muttered, before throwing the towel at Sora's face.

Riku frowned in annoyance and looked down at Olette who had an amused smile on her lips. "Well I guess you can stay in here with these crazy idiots, or you could go somewhere else…you're free to roam." Riku said, before turning to walk into the kitchen. "I'll be in here. If you need anything just ask."

"Thanks, I will." Olette said, smiling before he turned away. Riku smiled back and went to cleaning up the ingredients. Hearing the conversation from the other room, Riku knew that Olette had successfully joined in on their fun. Riku sighed and frowned a bit in sadness.

He always felt so apart from everyone else. He could never break into conversations and was often silent for fear of rejection. He had faced nothing but rejection when he had first moved here. It was so unlike his old island home. He was nothing here and Sora was everything.

After cleaning the countertop, the sliver haired man sat down in one of the island chairs and laid his head on his folded tattooed arms. Tomorrow was his birthday. He had tried to push the thought away, but was unsuccessful. It didn't help that Sora had circled the date on every calendar in the house. Each one sported in big letters 'Flamin' Duke hits 21'.

Riku chuckled at the thought and the smiled sadly. Everything was so different. He could barely remember life before the past four years. It all seemed like a distant memory. Yet Riku knew it would soon be a reality.

He had been asked to go back to the islands and meet with a composer. It would be a wonderful experience, meeting such a famous and respected composer. Yet the fear Riku felt in returning to his old home was fierce. Riku was considering declining the offer. But then he would miss out on such a great experience. Saying he was stuck in the middle was an understatement.

Studying the vivid tattoos on his arms, Riku thought back to the day he had gotten his first tattoo. It was on his seventeenth birthday, and it was also the day he had picked up the worst habit he had ever had. Doing drugs.

Now it was four years later. 12 tattoos, 6 piercings and 2 years of being clean, later. It was so ironic.

Looking at his newest tattoo, Riku smiled. It was dedicated to his drug addiction. Breaking the habit that is. He had gotten it done the previous day. His cousin, Seifer, had specifically designed it for him and did it himself. It was a real piece of art, the tattoo was.

Riku lifted his head up from his arms when he felt his cell-phone vibrate in his pants pocket.

"Hello?" He asked into the phone, already knowing who was on the other line.

"What's up man?" Riku said after a minute, standing up from the island chair. It was Seifer. He always seemed to call at around 6:55 PM as it was right then.

"Yeah yeah, I'll be there. Sora's going nuts about the whole thing." Riku said, chuckling into the phone.

"Who's opening for you guys?" He asked after a moment. "Oh no, really? Shoot, they suck."

"Well yeah, their fan-base is a bunch of pre-teens." The silver haired man muttered, peaking into the oven to look at his precious pizza.

"No doubt man, no doubt. Yo, so it's been determined and all. I could go back to the islands for the summer to work with that composer."

"Yeah but what about my job and everything?" Riku said frowning into the phone. He knew Seifer would approve of him going back to the islands. And it wasn't only because of the composer. Riku, however, was trying to think of every possible excuse not to go back to his home world.

"Well yeah…I know, but I like the feel of it all." Riku sighed in frustration. He shouldn't have even mentioned his job. He had all the money he could ever

possibly want. Yet, he loved working for some reason. Lazy Seifer would never understand that part of him.

"Yeah okay, I'll think about it." Riku said after listening to his cousin's loud rant for a few minutes.

"No, really, I'll consider it. I'm not playing around." The silver haired man rubbed his arm and glanced into the family room. The three other adults were busy laughing at some stupid comedy on the large flat screen TV. Riku sighed a little bit when a feeling of loneliness came over him. Turning away, he focused on getting his pizza out of the oven, while ignoring whatever Seifer was saying.

"Oh okay, well talk to you later." Riku said, after hearing Seifer say good-bye on the phone, unaware that Riku hadn't been listening to anything he had been saying during the last part of the conversation.

Riku sighed and sat back down on the island chair, waiting for the pizza to cool. Glancing over at Sora's messenger bag, he noticed a piece of paper sticking out from the corner. Riku frowned at it and pulled it out, expecting to see one of the papers Sora had hidden from him the other day. To his surprise, it was a photograph.

Riku's heart dropped a little when he saw who was in the photograph. It was Sora from about four years ago and a red-haired girl. Sora was barely smiling in the picture, yet the girl held a very beautiful grin.

Thoughts of his home world and his parents, his school and his old friends, came flooding back to Riku's mind in a rush. It was a painful feeling, remembering all of them. It hurt to think of his parents and it hurt to think of his home. Riku could barely remember his old school and his old home. All of his old memories had been clouded over by his new ones.

Pushing those thoughts away, Riku studied the picture with a child's curiosity. The picture was taken in the courtyard area of the school. Riku could definitely remember that area, yet he didn't know why. As hard as he tried, Riku couldn't remember the name of the girl. She had been Sora's girlfriend for a few months. Riku remembered that they had been very close.

Riku also remembered that he had somehow hurt the girl. A bet, a high school dance bet. He couldn't exactly remember what went down, but he did remember her crying while running away from the dance floor in a peach colored dress.

Riku felt a pang of guilt as he studied the face of the girl. He had never apologized to her. He'd never said he was sorry. He owed her an apology, even though she probably wouldn't remember who he was. It could possibly be a benefit to going back to the islands, and then again it probably wasn't.

The silver haired man didn't know what to think about the whole situation. He didn't want to go back to the islands. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he was scared. He wasn't who he used to be. Confident, strong, and obnoxious. He was quiet now, unsure about his feelings and others, he didn't trust easily because he couldn't trust himself. He didn't know how to communicate his

feelings for he had never communicated them properly. He was often anxious, stressed, and socially awkward.

Even if people remembered him they wouldn't remember him.

He was a shell of what he used to be. A good shell, as others would say, but he always felt empty and alone. Despite having a few close friends, he still felt as if he could not confide in anyone his true feelings. Sora wouldn't understand because he cared mostly for himself. Yuffie being positive most of the time couldn't comprehend his depressed feelings. Her answer to his problems was 'just be happy'. Riku knew that just 'being happy' was almost impossible. You had to have something to be happy for. And although Seifer had stayed by Riku the entire time of his drug addiction and made sure that he didn't get in trouble, he couldn't understand why his rich younger cousin was unhappy. To Seifer, Riku appeared to be almost selfish.

It seemed cruel, his life. God seemed to hate him. But Riku knew that he deserved it. It was merely the consequence for past mistakes.

Yet, deep down, Riku held a tiny piece of pity for himself.

He didn't understand why it had to be so bad. He didn't understand why things couldn't change.

It was as if he was seeking forgiveness, and the only person who could forgive him was himself.

However whenever he thought of this, a question lurked in the back of his conscious.

Was it possible to truly forgive someone you hate?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I tried not to hate you, but you're really not that likeable. I sometimes wish I could kill you, but I'm not a murderer. I couldn't take your life, because everyone deserves to live. But I wish you were dead, I really do. Maybe someday you'll fall, and I won't be there to catch you. And I'll watch you scream as you plunge to the bottom. And guess what, it'll be like I murdered you. But not exactly. I won't kill you, but I won't save you. Can't you see my hatred now?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Just wanted to thank my reviewers, I love you guys. : )

Until next time.

Peace.