"Heeeeyy, earth to Ren! Are you listening to me?" Anya waved her tiny hands dangerously close to Renata's face.
"Y-yeah. Wait. What are we talking about?" Renata blinked back into reality.
"Honestly, your mind wanders around more than the Scouting Legion," Marcel rolled his eyes. Renata glared back daggers. The two had been visiting Renata at the infirmary regularly for the past eight weeks. It was slow going staying inside most of the day. She'd been required to keep up with the new formation plans and strategy lessons, but the same could not be required for physical exercises. She spent that time in physical therapy with the nurse.
"I was saying we should look into joining the Military Police. I mean, there's a very high chance that all three of us will graduate within the top ten of the 102nd. We've all scored at the top of each training section, and we haven't gotten chewed out by any of the instructors so far. If we keep this up, we'll get to live in the lap of luxury for the rest of our lives! What do you all say? I don't want to go to the interior by myself! I don't think I'll be able to fit in alone."
"Anya, you barely even fit in with us…" Marcel shook his head. "The interior doesn't sound so bad, though. Probably gets dull, but who really wants to fight titans anyway? I just feel bad for all the other chumps here. Come graduation, they won't have the same luxury of choice like us."
"You really should listen to yourselves sometimes," Renata sighed. "There's nothing guaranteed to us here. We've barely gotten through our first year. You can't go making assumptions about our rankings just yet. Who knows? Maybe Eisenberg will pass us all up eventually."
"Eisenberg? Mr. Bleeding-heart? He's way too soft. He'll titan bait to the dummies before we know it! At least he made it through the first field exercise without breaking anything. The same can't be said for a certain someone…" A wry smile played at Marcel's lips.
"It's a sprain. Nothing is broken. And it was an honest mistake," Renata snorted. "Either way, he's got one leg up on me at the very least. He's not limited to a bed for three months. I'll be the chump pretty soon. Plus, the instructors are on your side. They could care less about how much I try."
"Especially with that attitude."
"I could care less about how they care less. I'm not here to impress them, but I'm not here to be a useless meat sack either."
It was a half truth. Deep inside, Renata craved some validation for the amount of effort she placed in their grueling training regimen. Put bluntly, the entire situation was just unfair. She was being punished for her initiative and skill. The other half of Renata honestly did not care.
"So what branch are you considering, Renata?" Marcel inquired as he shuffled a deck of cards.
"The Scouting Legion," she replied flatly.
"Ren, you can't! They lose so many soldiers on those meaningless expeditions. You'll just become another statistic," Anya was suddenly at her feet, clutching Renata's hand.
"I'd rather die on a meaningless expedition than die waiting on a meaningless king."
"Always have to get on your soapbox and preach about the monarchy, eh? Of course it makes sense that you joined the military. How does it feel always being perched on that pedestal of morals?"
"Marcel, stop that. Look, at least we're being honest with ourselves, Ren. I thought that you of all people would want stability. After everything you had to see in Shiganshina, don't you think you deserve some peace?"
It'd been seven years since Renata had last seen Mitras. Her departure had been during an unpleasant period with her family. She never did look back. There wasn't much for her to miss aside from spending time with her brother. Of course, her friends had yet to understand this viewpoint. She had yet to tell them of her life in the capital.
"I'm not trying to change your minds, guys. What you decide to do is your own choice. Mitras is a beautiful place – lonely – but beautiful. There's just too much history for me to live peacefully back there."
"Whatever you say… "
"Soooo, another round of Rummy?"
Three weeks later, Renata was finally discharged from the infirmary and cleared for training. She awoke before sunrise and got dressed for the long day ahead. Her uniform consisted of the standard issue boots, 3DMG harness, and off-white slacks with a simple white button-up beneath the cropped, tan jacket. She finished it off with a pair of elbow length leather gloves that buckled over the jacket sleeves. Her red hair draped over her back in a loose braid.
After a final check over her 3DMG gear, she set off towards the training grounds. The other recruits still remained fast asleep. By the time she arrived, the sun was already peeking up behind the horizon. Shadis stood waiting by the 3DMG mounts they had used as beginners. Renata desperately hoped they wouldn't be starting back from square one. It'd be utterly demoralizing to have to re-master staying upright with the three-dimensional gear. Renata quickly surveyed the deserted quarry. At least she'd only be embarrassed in front of one instructor instead of the entire squadron.
"Don't bother mounting. I'd hope you're past the balancing act already," Shadis greeted. "We're going to try something a little different today."
"Yes, sir," Renata responded drowsily. She followed him to the base of the cliff behind the mounting apparatus. The cliff tapered in a smooth angle near the bottom then suddenly shot directly up at a ninety-degree angle for one hundred feet.
"You're going to climb this cliff face with only your three-dimensional gear and your lower body strength," Shadis announced. "You're not allowed to use the gas to propel yourself up, and you're not allowed to quit until you reach the very top."
"You have got to be kidding me… Vertical wall scaling without gas assistance is almost impossible. I don't have that kind of lower body strength."
"I'm a man of limitless patience, cadet. We can hang out here all day and night if you want. So I suggest you start getting climbing."
Renata glanced at her instructor dumbfounded. There was absolutely now way she'd make it up the cliff side with her legs and the grapples alone. At a ninety-degree angle, re-positioning each cable as she scaled the wall would be nearly impossible. There wasn't enough clearance to re-fire each time… unless she tried something a little unorthodox.
Positioning herself on a small boulder at the base of the cliff, Renata angled her hips towards the highest point she could manage. She pulled the triggers when she found the perfect angle, burying the anchors deep into the rock face. Then she began to climb. At first, she managed without hanging on to the cables, but as the grade of the incline increased, she found herself depending on them for balance. Eventually, her body was completely parallel to the ground, forcing her to fight both the gravity and vertigo that had settled in. A slight ache began to grow in her lower back. It was a slow process finding the proper footholds and using the contracting the right muscles to take advantage of the cable tension, but Renata pushed onward. The faster she got done with it, the sooner she could get back to sleep.
"Why did you come here, Svoboda?" Shadis suddenly shouted from below. His voice took Renata by surprise and almost sent her careening back to the base of the cliff. She steadied herself on the cables and took a deep breath.
"I'm here for humanity's sake! I want to reclaim what was taken from Shiganshina!" she finally replied. She took Shadis's silence as an order to continue moving, and so she did. Gravity's pull became more evident as she climbed higher and higher. The rock face began to grow jagged and uneven. Renata had to carefully consider where she decided to step next. When she finally came close to the anchor points of the cables, she knew she'd have to take a risk with the next maneuver. She carefully steadied herself on the cables and bent her knees towards the cliff. Her body leaned forward and up. In one smooth motion, she jackknifed off the rock face and released the grapple anchors from the cliff. As her body began to enter free-fall, she quickly re-fired the anchors into a position higher on the wall. The resulting force pulled her back into the rock face and positioned her slightly lower than she had been before she jumped. Thus, she began to climb again. Renata repeated the move two more times. On the second attempt, her body slipped on the landing, and one of the cables unhooked from the cliff side. She violently slammed into the rocks like a ragdoll sending spasms of sharp pain down her back. After taking a few moments to recover, she repositioned herself and continued onward.
"Cadet, what do you think you're doing here?" Shadis shouted again after a long pause.
"I'm preparing for humanity's sake!" Renata strained to yell back at her instructor.
"How far will you go?"
"Until the battle is won!"
As she began to reach the top of the cliff, the rocks became so jagged and irregular that Renata's footholds began to spread wide from each other. She spent double the time searching for gaps that would hold her weight. Pulling off her re-positioning maneuver would be very dangerous in this situation, but she was so close to seeing the top. Sweat beaded at her forehead as the sun rose high behind her. Her arms screamed in pain and fatigue while her legs had grown numb. She was one maneuver away from the top. If she could land it, she would be home free for the climb. She positioned herself in a low crouch again and attempted to re-position the anchors into their final resting points. The jump came out a hair too short, and her legs caught into two deep gaps on the rock face. Her left ankle was bent into an awkward position. Unfortunately, this positioning meant she'd have to make the final few feet of the climb without assistance of the cables.
"Why are you here, cadet?!" Shadis suddenly yelled again.
"I want to save humanity!" Renata called back down.
"That's not the answer I want to hear!"
Renata's right foothold slipped from the gap. She grabbed the right cable to balance herself just as her other foot lost contact with the cliff face. Her body crashed into the rock, leaving her nose badly scrapped. She let her body go limp in defeat.
"Why are you here, cadet?!"
"I'm repaying a debt," she finally replied.
"A debt to whom?"
"To the two people who ever gave my life purpose."
"And they are?"
Silence.
"I can't hear you, cadet!"
"Dead to the world. Dead because of my ignorance," Renata's voice trailed into a whimper. What the hell was she doing here? Why was she still trying so hard to make them proud? Tears welled up in her eyes and blurred her vision. Who was she kidding anyway? This wasn't the life she had planned to live, and yet she was trying so hard to pretend like she could handle the cards that had been dealt. She clawed at the tears in her eyes and glared back down at the base of the cliff. So this was the game Shadis was playing – he wanted to see her at her weakest. He wanted to break her and everything she stood for. But he didn't know her. He didn't know her dreams of seeing the outside world. He had no idea what she was capable of. What she stood for was so much bigger than him. How dare he challenge that? When Renata found him, he'd melt from the anger pouring from her eyes. But he was nowhere to be found. The man had completely disappeared.
"I'm still waiting, cadet," Shadis called from above. He stood at the peak of the cliff, leering down at Renata's limp figure. She met his gaze with surprise and bitterness.
Renata continued the climb, this time with the resolution to reach the top and beat the living daylights out of her instructor's balding head. Just as she was about to begin the final few feet without assistance from the grapple cables, Shadis shouted down, "Use your gas, cadet!"
Who the hell does he think he is?
Renata brushed off his advice and continued to claw at the rock face. She could see the peak growing closer and closer. She released the anchors from the cliff to continue moving upwards. Her right hand reached the top first just as her right foothold gave way, filling her body with pre-free fall sensations. A strong arm grabbed her right wrist and yanked her body onto the top of the cliff. Shadis's shadow loomed over Renata's heaving body. She took a moment to catch her breath then lunged towards his ominous figure. He slowly sidestepped to the right and sent Renata into a crumpled heap on the ground.
"You didn't hesitate that time, but you still have a lot to learn about team work," he stated firmly.
"Team work? If I remember correctly, I was the only one climbing that damned cliff!" Renata spat back.
"And yet, when I offered you my help, you conveniently ignored it."
Renata sat silently. He did have a point. It would have been so much easier to use the gas to propel herself up those last few feet. What had held her back? Why had she been so angry? She stared at the ground, lost in her train of thought.
"Have you finally realized what you are really doing here, cadet? Or would you like to join the next wagon out to the landfills?"
"I-I… Sir, I know why I'm here."
Shadis rubbed his stubbled chin and turned towards the cliff. The sun sat high above the training grounds. He smiled to himself; content he'd finally made some progress. Somewhere, Etzel would be smiling as well.
"Good work today, Svoboda. That is all I have. We will continue tomorrow."
Renata saluted in response. Once she had gathered herself, she slowly began to walk towards a trail leading back down into the quarry. She had just been out of earshot when Shadis called back, "Svoboda!"
"Yes, sir."
"Veritas inlustrat."
He then turned and walked in the opposite direction towards the officers' cabins. Renata stood dead in her tracks, dumbstruck by the words he had just uttered. There was no way he could have known that phrase unless he was one of them. She hesitated in her steps, unsure of whether to call the words back. Her suspicious side got the best of her and she decided against it, continuing instead back to the trainee village for a full meal and a night's rest.
Et fidelii oríminī.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I decided to cut "The Silence That Follows" in half for an easier read. I've also fixed a few details in the story to address continuity issues and add in more character development... more to come soon!
DISCLAIMER: I do not claim any rights to any creative and/or intellectual property belonging to Hajime Isayama. All source material is based from Shingeki no Kyojin and credit is given to the aforementioned author.