Chapter Three: A New Challenger Approaches
Inside the home, madness had ensued, while outside a new challenger was watching with a keen eye. He watched as Hidan flopped onto the couch, covering his eyes and groaning in irritation. It appeared that he had had enough of this day. As well, he saw Deidara as he huffed with annoyance, covering his eye with his hand to shield himself from the seemingly nude young man wandering around the room. Watching as the events inside became more chaotic, the outsider sighed softly and opened the door.
"Hidan, what the hell are you doing? You've been gone for weeks,"
"The fuck do you mean weeks, I've been gone for a day!" Hidan spat at his partner, Kakuzu. Kakuzu narrowed his eyes,
"The amount of work you get done in a week is the same as a day for a normal person. You're being gone for a day is the same as you being gone a week. Now, let's find a way back home and get Pein his money, quickly."
"And how the fuck do you propose we do that?" Hidan asked, raising an eyebrow. The duo spent that night trying to come up with possible solutions to their predicament, contemplating many ways to get home. Unfortunately, it turned out that none of the ideas they had could come to fruition. During the long night, Hidan had fallen asleep on the couch, his head resting on Kakuzu's shoulder. The other sat there, thoughts racing through his head. As the next day dawned, the two decided that their best plan of action was to get jobs in this strange world.
"It appears that, based on what you have told me, the Akatsuki have been finding their way to this world one way or another. Sooner or later, Pein will arrive here and we will give him the money at that time. For now, it would be best to procure employment and then save the money. I will find a safe." Kakuzu turned to the group of others as they ate breakfast, "if any of you try to steal my money, you will die." Hidan chuckled,
"He's being truthful. Don't even try it." During their search for employment, Hidan found his place at a fast food business while Kakuzu miraculously became a banker.
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While the duo had found themselves work, the others went back to school. Deidara found nothing better to do in this world and decided that he might as well join; as well he would get to speak more with the orange one if he went to school. The orange one was interesting to him. It was as if they could relate. Once again, Deidara found himself in the girls' uniform. He had come to accept it, because no matter how much he screamed, there never seemed to be a spare boys' uniform. He had been given a locker and on this certain day, as he opened it, he found it stuffed to the brim with various chocolates. He picked up one that had fallen on the ground, reading it aloud,
"'Even if you are a man, I still think you're pretty. I can dig that you and I have the same anatomy.' What the fuck?"
"It's Valentine's day, so some people put chocolates in others' lockers if they happen to like them," he heard Tohru state cheerfully. Deidara felt a blush slowly creep up on his cheeks. Did all these boys really, well, like him in that manner? He was unsure whether he should be offended or not. Deidara sighed, just when he was about to shut his locker he saw a girl run up to him,
"Hi, I feel really bad for you because everyone always calls you a girl. I think you're really masculine, by the way. It takes a real man to wear a skirt," she said with a wink. She held out a box for him, giving him a kiss on the cheek,
"You're the first to not think I was a girl, un. Interesting," he said with a smile. For a moment, he felt like he there may have been a tear forming in his eye, but he quickly wiped it away. She gave him a quick hug before scampering away to her friends, a blush clearly forming on her cheeks. As the group kept walking, they came across a trash can filled with chocolates.
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"What do you mean you don't want lettuce? Fuck you. Eat the fucking lettuce and like it! I'm not even certain how to say to not put the damn lettuce on this shit ass broken machine." Hidan was getting more and more frustrated with the customers, his glares becoming worse and worse as the day passed. He once resorted to throwing several pieces of lettuce at the customers and throwing his hands in the air, "Fuck it, I'm taking my break." At this point, he found it an acceptable time to go pester Deidara while he continued at this "school".
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Kakuzu looked around, certain that nobody was around to watch him as he grabbed a couple stacks of money into his pockets. 'This money isn't being put to use, they're just letting it sit around. I'll fix that, we shall spend it on many wondrous items,' he thought.
"Sir? Could I get some assistance?" Kakuzu turned around, seeing a young man with his check book sitting on the counter,
"I'm busy, can't you see that?" The man furrowed his eyebrows,
"What are you doing?" Kakuzu frowned, looking at the man again with annoyance,
"What does it look like I'm doing? Obviously, I'm taking money from this establishment. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go home and put this in a safe place. I have much better uses of this." He flipped the man off before walking out the door, calmly patting down his pockets to make sure the bills didn't escape. On the way back to their "base of operations", Kakuzu found a certain man swearing at passersby. They exchanged a few glances and decided that they would both go to this "school" and visit Deidara and the other weird ones. As they entered, they watched the orange one punch the wall aggressively, as well they saw out of the corner of their eyes, a girl running up to Deidara,
"Dei-chan, you're so cute and masculine! How could anybody ever think you were a girl? All of us girls know you're a boy." Deidara raised an eyebrow, curiously,
"And why haven't you mentioned any of this before? Oddly enough, nobody has mentioned that they knew my true sex prior to this day, un. But thank you anyway, I guess," he said curtly. Afterwards, he turned his attention to see the orange one walking away, "wait for me, Orange One! I wish to accompany you." Once he had reached Kyo, he saw another girl. This time, the girl gave a chocolate to the orange one,
"Kyo-kun, I'm giving you this chocolate as a gift!" Kyo took the chocolates in his hand and stared at them, shrugging his shoulders and nodding at the girl. Deidara had taken one of his packages of chocolates and opened it, examining the contents inside and taking a bite of one of the little brown lumps. They were sweet…and he kind of liked them. As he continued to investigate the chocolates curiously, he heard a certain foul mouthed man enter,
"Oy, Deidara, what the fuck as you holding?" Hidan cried, raising an eyebrow,
"Chocolate. It's sweet and I like it, unlike you." Deidara said coldly. Hidan frowned, huffing and turning away from Deidara,
"How much did that cost you? Give me your change," Kakuzu commanded from behind Hidan. Deidara shook his head,
"I received this and many more as gifts from the students. They love me." Hidan pursed his lips, pouting slightly,
"I want some of that." After a moment's though, he lunged for the chocolates only to have Deidara pull them away in a comedic fashion, reminiscent of the Peanuts cartoons. Slipping past Deidara like a bull at a bull fight and sliding on the ground, a girl walked up and patted his head,
"Hidan is your name, right? I have something to give you, so you won't need to take the others' chocolates. Here," she stated, holding out a box of chocolates and helping Hidan up,
"Thanks, I guess. What is this for?"
"It's for Valentine's Day, you silly." The girl gave him a quick hug before waving and scampering off,
"Hidan, give me that box." Kakuzu stated quietly, "I am going to sell it online on some place called 'E-bay' and get more money,"
"What the fuck is an E-bay?" Kakuzu sighed,
"It is a place where I can sell these silly trinkets to people all over this strange world. I believe I heard it being called the 'International Garage Sale', whatever that means. Someone was talking about it at work." Hidan glowered,
"This is mine; get your own fucking chocolates. I want to eat these." Tohru turned to Deidara, speaking softly,
"Your friends are scary,"
"They're not my friends, un," Deidara grumbled.
"There are some bad vibes emanating from those two – the new one in particular" Hanajima stated calmly.
"The loud one swears a lot," Yuki commented quietly. Deidara shrugged their comments off,
"You get used to it. They aren't even the worst, un," he stated, imagining a certain masked man. In the background, Hidan and Kakuzu had yet to cease their argument over the chocolates.
"Hidan, give me those or I will rip off your head and not sew it back on," Kakuzu growled.
"Damn it, no. These are my fucking chocolates; you can go get your own to sell!" Deidara had had just about enough, stepping between the two and pushing them away from one another,
"Shut the hell up. Both of you. You're giving me a migraine," he stated slowly, "and if either of you don't stop I will force you to be quiet by blowing you to bits." Every head in the hall slowly turned towards the three,
"Deidara, you have absolutely no right telling me what the fuck I can and cannot do! Jashin will help me kill you," Hidan shouted,
"Hidan, you have forced me to hurt you." Deidara replied, "I will aim for your head," he said, as he readied his clay.
"Also, Hidan, if your head comes flying off, I will allow it to fly out the window," Kakuzu added, "don't expect me to sew it back on unless you give me those damn chocolates, you bastard."
"The fuck is your deal with these chocolates?!" Hidan screeched, holding the chocolates close to his chest.
"I will not pass up the opportunity to obtain monetary value from those chocolates, you know damn well that this organization needs it!"
"Well, fuck you. You can't have them." Hidan pouted; all the while, Deidara had prepared his clay sculptures and was ready to bring pain to Hidan. Kakuzu dragged his partner over towards the window, and before anyone could blink there was a small explosion and Hidan's head had flown straight out the window. Apparently, it had not been sewn on quite well enough the last time.
"I told you I would aim for you head, un," Deidara sneered.
"Damn it, you bastards!" Hidan screamed from the ground below the window. The high school students all turned to look at each other, wonder etched on all their features. How was it that this man had managed to get his head blown off, but was still yelling at the other two? It was curious, indeed. As if knowing what was on all their minds, Kakuzu turned to the students and stated,
"He's immortal." Eyes went wide all around as this new information sank into their heads. An immortal man? Incredible. Looking out the window and staring at Hidan's head, Kakuzu said slowly,
"I may consider sewing your head back onto your body...if you give me those chocolates." Hidan growled at the two above him,
"Fine, have your fucking chocolates. Just sew my head back on and don't you dare throw my body out that window, you bastards!"
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As the group made their way back to Shigure's home, another day ending at last, Kakuzu sewed Hidan's head back on and obtained the chocolates to sell on E-bay. Deidara, walking slightly behind them with Kyo by his side, enjoyed a few of his own chocolates that the girls at school had given to him. They were…nice, to say the least.
Deidara turned to Kyo quickly, "is this what Valentine's Day is always like? Would you like a chocolate, Orange one?" Kyo shook his head,
"No, it's usually quieter and has less swearing, those two made it something special – and no, I'd rather not have a chocolate right now." As the group returned home, they saw Shigure standing outside the home,
"Oh, there's another one?" he questioned, "well, we don't have enough room for this one," he said, pointing at Kakuzu.
"It is fine," Kakuzu said, "Hidan and I will camp outside." Hidan's eyes went wide,
"The fuck? Why do I have to camp out with you? Inside there's a room and bed, all for me!" Hidan screamed his reply,
"You come with me or I get Deidara to blow your head off again,"
"Fine."
Once again, outside the windows, a new challenger approached the home. The group had only seen a glimpse of the shadow before it disappeared from sight. Who could this person be?
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Hola mis amigos,
Oh, my. This chapter was a bit harder to transition through because my freshman-self thought it would be a great idea to put a "fast forward" in the chapter. Ugh. Damn it, freshman-self. So, as a solution, I just sacrificed consistency in dates. It hopefully isn't too bad that I jumped around on the calendar a bit.
Guess who said they would update the story every few weeks and then went on a two week vacation before they got the chance to update? This dumb-dumb. My parents decided it would be awesome to go see some of the American Southwest, so we went to Arizona and Utah. I'll write more this weekend because I won't be able to do anything without dying. I'll be getting my wisdom teeth pulled tomorrow morning.
As promised, a new chapter will be out soon-ish because there isn't much for me to do aside from wait for my schedule for next year and dorm assignment. I'm leaving for University life on 29 August. It's kind of exciting, but kind of scary at the same time. Oh, and if I said this last time, I'm sorry, but I passed IB! Yay! I got a 6 in Spanish, which is incredible for my ability. I was never that great at Spanish, but apparently I was good enough to get 6 out of 7. I apparently have "good presentation" according to my teacher.
Anyway, that's all for now. I love all of you and hope you stick around for the rest of this story. I'm trying to add a bit more flair to it than it had before, so hopefully it's just as good as it was.
Besos,
~Master Boss