Hermione felt like she had been in a daze all day. She had only been vaguely aware of the funeral service and the wake afterwards. Hermione was convinced that the only way she had coped with the day was by concentrating on Narcissa. By helping Narcissa cope with the day's events Hermione didn't have to concentrate on the fact they were saying goodbye to the man she loved.
Once Hermione had left the Manor however she was finding it harder to ignore what the day had been about. Despite her mother fussing around the penthouse and Harry and Ron chatting away in the front room Hermione still felt all alone as she thought about the day's events.
Hermione was currently standing in the dining room looking out of the large window at the view of London spread out below her. Night was just falling and Hermione stood mesmerised as more lights appeared across the city. Hermione had always loved the view from this particular window and it was one of the first things she had noticed about the penthouse when her and Draco first viewed it when they were looking for somewhere to live.
"Hermione, come and sit down." Helen Granger called to her daughter. "I've made you some sandwiches."
"I'm not hungry." Hermione replied, still staring out of the window.
"I don't care, you need to eat." Helen insisted.
"I'm fine." Hermione sighed. She knew her mother was only nagging because she cared but Hermione was finding it tiring.
"Hermione Jean Granger, come and eat now." Helen demanded.
Hermione sighed but gave in to her mother's demands. She knew that if she didn't try and eat that her mother would only continue to nag. Hermione also knew that she really had to start taking better care of herself for the baby's sake.
So far Narcissa was the only person Hermione had confided in about her pregnancy. Hermione had told Draco's mother about the baby when she was trying to convince her to attend the funeral. Hermione had been seriously worried that Narcissa was going to take to her bed and never leave so she hoped that telling her about the baby would help her cope and give her something to concentrate on. Hermione's idea seemed to work as Narcissa showed some signs of life as she vowed to support Hermione and help her with the baby.
After managing to eat one of the sandwiches her mother had prepared for her Hermione took her plate into the kitchen.
"What are you doing?" Hermione asked. Her mother was currently searching the cupboards and had a small pile of food sitting on the kitchen counter.
"Sorting things out. You have a lot of food you don't even like." Helen replied, pulling a box of cereal out of the cupboard and examining it. "Look muesli, you hate muesli."
"It's not mine." Hermione muttered. The cereal belonged to Draco and it was one of the only things he would eat on a morning.
"I know sweetheart." Helen said, hugging Hermione. "I just thought it might be easier for you if I cleared things out for you."
"Thank you." Hermione said, grateful for her mother's kind thoughts. In the last week Hermione had thought about doing exactly what her mother was doing but she couldn't bring herself to get rid of anything belonging to Draco, even food.
"After I've finished in the kitchen we can start on another room." Helen said, closing the cupboard she had just sorted.
"No." Hermione said quickly. Throwing away food she wouldn't eat was one thing but Hermione wasn't ready to part with anything else.
"It's okay we can wait." Helen said gently. "But you will have to sort things Hermione, you can't just carry on as though nothing's happened."
"I know, I'm just not ready yet." Hermione said.
As her mother opened another cupboard Hermione left her to it and headed into the front room. Ron and Harry were sitting with the television on quietly when Hermione entered the room and sat down next to Ron.
"Are you okay?" Ron asked.
Hermione nodded and curled up in the corner of the sofa. Harry and Ron looked at Hermione for a few minutes before they continued their conversation. Over the last week they had found that Hermione found it comforting to be around her friends, even if she wasn't taking part in the conversation.
For nearly fifteen minutes Hermione sat curled up listening to Harry and Ron before her mother entered the room. Hermione's mother had a box of food in her arms and her coat and bag were slung over her arm.
"I'm off now. I'll see you tomorrow, sweetheart." Helen said, pecking Hermione on the cheek.
"Will you bring dad with you tomorrow, please?" Hermione asked. She had decided it was time to tell her parents about the baby.
"Of course." Helen agreed, wondering if there was something particular Hermione wanted to discuss with her father. "Bye boys." She called as she headed for the front door.
After Helen had left Harry stood up and picked up his own jacket. "I should be off as well." He was eager to visit Charlie to discuss his theories on Draco's accident.
"Can you stay for a minute, Harry." Hermione said, sitting up and moving into the middle of the sofa. "There's something I want to tell you."
Harry immediately sat back down. If Hermione wanted to talk he wasn't planning on leaving. Harry and Ron both looked at Hermione, wondering what she wanted to discuss. In the past week she had barely uttered more than a few words but now it looked like she was finally ready to talk.
"I'm pregnant." Hermione decided to just go straight ahead with what she wanted to say.
"That's great Hermione." Ron said with a smile.
"Yeah, it's brilliant." Harry added.
"It would be better if the baby had a father though." Hermione said sadly.
"I know it's not the same Hermione, but we'll all be here for you and the baby." Ron said, hugging Hermione.
Harry moved so he was sitting on the other side of Hermione on the sofa. "And we'll make sure the baby knows all about Draco." He said, hugging Hermione from the other side.
"Yeah, we can tell them about the time he was turned into a ferret, that was pretty funny." Ron said.
Hermione smiled softly. The ferret incident was something most of the Weasley family enjoyed teasing Draco about. Despite being touchy about it at first Draco had eventually come to see the funny side of the story and would then often laugh along with people when they mentioned it.
"Thank you. It means a lot that you're supporting me." Hermione said.
"We'll always support you Hermione." Ron said. "We love you."
Hermione, Harry and Ron sat in silence for several minutes. Eventually Harry got up again and picked up his jacket.
"I'm sorry, Hermione but I really have to go." Harry said. "I'll see you tomorrow after work."
"You don't have to come round Harry." Hermione said, hugging Harry.
"I know, I want to." Harry insisted, before he headed into the fireplace and flooed home.
"Do you want me to go as well?" Ron asked, wondering if Hermione wanted to be alone.
"Not really." Hermione shrugged. "But I'll understand if you have to leave, you do have a life of your own."
"I can stay. It's not as if I've got anywhere special to be." Ron said. Ron was single and lived in a small flat over the twins shop in Hogsmeade, which was where he worked as manager.
"Thanks Ron." Hermione said. "I don't really fancy being alone today."
"Do you want to watch a film?" Ron suggested, knowing Hermione probably wouldn't want to talk too much.
"Sure. I think there's some ice-cream in the freezer if you want any." Hermione said, smiling as Ron's eyes lit up at the mention of ice-cream. "I'm just going to change."
Ron rushed into the kitchen in search of ice-cream while Hermione headed into her room to get changed. After stripping off her formal clothes and getting washed Hermione looked for something more comfortable. Hermione pulled on a pair of black pyjama pants and was going to pull on the matching top when she spotted a dark blue sweatshirt belonging to Draco. Hermione picked up the top and held it for several minutes before she pulled it on. Pulling it over her head Hermione could smell Draco's familiar scent over the material and she instantly felt more at ease.
Over the past week Hermione had taken to sleeping in Draco's tops as it helped her to drop off but she had never worn anything of Draco's in front of anyone else. Hermione was aware that her mother and Molly thought she wasn't dealing with what had happened and she was sure if they saw what she wore to bed they would be even more convinced that she wasn't coping. Hermione however was confident that Ron wouldn't say anything about her choice of clothing, he had actually been watching what he said really carefully so that he didn't accidentally upset her any further.
Hermione left her bedroom and re-entered the front room where Ron already had the film set up and was munching on a tub of ice-cream. Hermione and Harry had taught Ron how to use the television and after taking a while to master the muggle technology the redhead had become a big television addict. While Ron was explaining about the film he had chosen Hermione curled up in the corner of the sofa. Ron had picked a James Bond film which were his favourite films.
Bond films were also Draco's favourite films and Ron and Draco had bonded over their love of 007 films. Despite the fact both men liked the film franchise they had still managed to indulge in petty bickering and had spent hours arguing over who was the best Bond, which car was the best and numerous other stuff involving the films.
"Do you want some ice-cream?" Ron asked, starting the film.
"No. You eat it." Hermione said. Growing up with two dentists as parents meant that Hermione wasn't big on sweet things.
Ron did as Hermione said and devoured the tub of ice-cream, eating it all within half an hour.
After the film Ron suggested another one but Hermione was tired so declined her friends offer. Ron removed the DVD and turned off the television before he grabbed his jacket.
"Call me if you need anything." Ron said, hugging Hermione. "Even if it's the middle of the night."
"I'm sure that won't be necessary, but thank you." Hermione said.
Ron smiled and after checking that Hermione really was fine he flooed home. After Ron's departure Hermione locked the floo network and secured the wards around the penthouse. Satisfied her home was secure Hermione went into her bedroom where she flopped straight into bed.
Hermione curled up on her side of the bed and pulled Draco's pillow into her arms. Hermione was disappointed to find his scent was wearing off the pillow and she realised that in a few days she wouldn't be able to smell him in their bed at all. Lying with her head buried in Draco's pillow Hermione finally broke down as the events of the day hit her.
Hermione lay crying for several hours before she was eventually cried out. Rolling over onto her back Hermione placed her hands on her stomach as she thought about the new life she was carrying inside her. Hermione was still coming to terms with the news and hadn't even had time to see a healer and get herself checked over. Hermione made a mental note to make an appointment with the healer over the next few days.
Trying to distract herself from thinking about Draco, Hermione started to think about what she would need for the baby. Unfortunately every time she thought of something new she couldn't help but wonder about Draco's reaction to the baby. Would he have been happy about the baby? Would he have wanted to move to somewhere with a garden? Would he have wanted more than one child?
Hermione and Draco had only spoken about children briefly and had agreed to wait until they were married before starting a family. As such Hermione had no idea whether Draco had wanted a big family or whether one child would have been sufficient. One thing Hermione did know was that Draco wanted to be a better father to his children than Lucius had ever been to him.
Draco had rarely spoken about his father but Hermione knew that their relationship wasn't easy and had been suffering for a long time before the war. Hermione knew that Draco often felt like a disappointment to his father and Lucius hadn't been shy in telling Draco how much he had failed him. Even after his imprisonment in Azkaban Lucius tried to show his disappointment in Draco. After finding out about Draco's relationship with Hermione Lucius had tried to disown his son but instead had found that Draco had already inherited everything after Lucius' trial, in which the Death Eater was sentenced to life imprisonment.
Hermione knew that Draco would have been a much better father than Lucius, in fact he would have been a great father. For one thing he would actually tell his child that he loved them. Because of his screwed up relationship with his father it had taken Draco a long time before he was able to tell Hermione that he loved her but once he had done it the first time it got easier and he used to make sure to let Hermione know just how much she meant to him on a regular basis. Hermione knew that Draco would have been the same way with their child and that they would have grown up knowing without a doubt that their father loved them.
Hermione planned on making sure their child knew that Draco would have loved them but she knew that it wouldn't be the same. Hermione knew that lots of things wouldn't be the same without Draco. While people could tell the child stories about Draco it wasn't the same as actually knowing their father and experiencing things first hand.
Hermione lay awake for hours thinking about Draco and the life they should have had together. She didn't think it was fair for them both to suffer through so much in the war only to have their happiness ripped away from them less than five years later.
A/N - I would just like to answer a few reviewer questions. SerpentofDarkness wanted to know why the Slytherins have acted now when Hermione and Draco have been together for so long - hopefully everything you want to know is explained in the next chapter. Deedlez01 wanted to know how long the story is going to be - I'm not really sure yet but it won't be that long as I don't want it to drag.