Back again with the newest chapter! I'm aiming to have Chapter Five up by Friday or Saturday evening for you guys. Thank you so much once again for following this story and an extra thank you to Bleedingheart2XLoLoa for the kind review! With this chapter we will finally see a real intimate moment for our pair leaving them even more unsettled :)

I added three little graphics for this fic on my tumblr page if you guys want to see them at all they're there and I'll probably upload more to my page my url is keatonsbrokenheart

Chapter Three: Don't Give Up On The Wanting

"So tell me about yourself….Scabior was it? What are you trying to escape from?"

Just hearing her speak his name created a jumble of knots in his stomach. He couldn't remember a time where someone spoke his name so innocently.

Not in a superior demand.

Not in aghast fear.

Not in trepidation.

It was so unknown but almost promising.

Her eyes tried meagerly to focus on his face and memorize every line and every speck of unshaven hair. Though the edges still blurred she could see him much better now and found herself greedily trying to take in every aspect of him. In this softer light she could tell she was very dead on with his eyes, though they were a much more steel colored light blue as they focused on the path in front of them. She wasn't sure when but she'd looped her arm through his but found herself comfortably wound around him such a pleasant manner. It was still of necessity as she was still struggling to keep her footing even but even if she was able to walk entirely properly she knew she'd possibly fake it just to keep this contact. His face remained as cold as a stone under her straining eyes and she knew that he was the type of man who wouldn't give away his secrets so easily. She understood that very well.

"Well it's a daily affair for me I 'suppose. Why wouldn't I want to ya know? People always complain being on the go is tiresome but I fancy it quite so 'cause it's what I do best."

Pride was very obvious in his voice and though it peaked her interest to know what he did a meager part of her thought not to push it too far just yet.

Take it slow Hermione you don't want to scare him off.

It was vague but truthful of an answer and he knew it would satisfy her on some level. Maybe she would understand, maybe she would even understand, but he didn't hold his hopes too high on it. How would a girl so close to the ground be able to reach them anyways? She continued to eye him fiercely with a look he couldn't quite determine and he feared viciously he'd already ruined his chance. Would that really bother him that much? Would it affect him all that much to lose her presence in his life? He couldn't fathom an answer he wanted to accept for that question.

"I never would expect something so deep from someone like you. I mean no offense with that I mean…rather that you just seem very indifferent to things. Very detached and clever and cool more to say. Erm, I feel I'm only talking myself in incomprehensible circles with this…"

Finally her eyes wandered off their trained gaze on him and towards the walk way in front of them. Only then was he allowed his chance to peer down at her and see the flustered look gracing her face. He chuckled freely never having seen this side of her yet before. It was one he rather liked just as much as the distant mysterious side of her.

"A bit pissed still beautiful? You can hammer back a beer as well as any lad I know. I mean that in a round about compliment sort of way."

They locked eyes for the first time since leaving the club and she was instantly enamored by his toothy genuine grin that glimmered down at her. Why was her heart thumping so loud? Was her heart trying to escape her heart from all the excess or was this just an ill-fated fear of sharing such a candid moment with someone? She worried she had already begun to crawl too far under his skin to be removed from this intense connection. His deep laugh shook down his arm and she could feel its vibrations nearly in her own chest.

"You're absolutely right I'm afraid. I'm not too great at being ladylike my best friends often tell me that I'm far too brash and proud to be like other women. If I wasn't though I fear they'd never survive because no one else as smart as me would be able to deal with them."

It was true and she found herself smiling and reminiscing of times long past now of them in the Gryffindor common rooms arguing over thoughtless things. It had all been so much easier back then even if it didn't seem like it at the time. The minor interactions and battles against the dark lord seemed so microscopic compared to having to face him and an entire army head on. She knew she was looking back at things with rose tinted glasses but there was much truth still in that outlook. Back then she hadn't fallen into this strange detached head space that she currently resided in. She could still touch and feel and comprehend everything happening around her. Her fingers could grip something without fear that they would slip right out from under her. She imagined it was a lot like being a ghost in someone else's skin. Something just didn't settle right like the flesh was a fraction of an inch too big and would some times slide against bones and rub areas raw with the traction. Had she perhaps accidentally died without knowing it? Was this some sort of limbo that she'd been sent to in some chance to atone for unidentified sins?

That thousand mile stare he'd become accustomed to was boring holes through the concrete in front of them and he worried momentarily he'd have to physically shake her just to bring her back. A riddle wrapped in an enigma and he knew he was still no closer to figuring her out. They'd reached the coffee shop and he brought them to a stop in hopes she would rouse from whatever distant plane she had travelled to. When this still did not bring her back he made his first completely uncalculated move when it came to her. Taking his free arm he brought his hand to gently rest on her cheek pulling her face up to his and before he could even see if her face read any recognition he brought his lips to hers.

It was more than skin on skin.

It was more than two people's lips melding together.

It was whispered lingering hope and tangible dreams she could almost see herself reaching out and touching to curl her fingers around. It was raw and real and for once it was something she could actually feel. Maybe it was a cry that escaped her lips when they parted or perhaps it was a moan; she wasn't sure anymore what to think. All the thoughts in her mind had come to a screeching halt. No definitions. No ponderings. No logical tracking of this new found feeling. All there was to hear was her heart thumping, thumping, thumping, like the pounding of a war drum. Blood flushing every inch of skin as the feeling rapidly took her over and leaving her with a vacant mind.

"That was…"

No words could even fall into her mouth because she was just so astounded that something like this was real and palpable. His eyes seemed to be reeling with the same sentiment as he looked straight in her eyes with the same puzzled emotion playing on his lips.

"Absolutely amazing love…well we best be heading on in before the people in the window think they're about to get a free show."

Even now his wit didn't let him down and he winked at her before placing his hand on the small of her back and leading her through the doorway. Pin pricks inched up her skin around where his hand rested like he was sending shocks into her very core flaying the top layers of skin. It was more magnetic than anything she'd ever felt before. As they seated themselves in a back corner ordering their drinks she found she couldn't bring her eyes to meet his anymore. It was terrifying to know someone she hardly knew could have this kind of power over her. Could she still really be a ghost trapped in limbo if something made her feel so corporeal in her own body? All the nights pining over Ron and tugging at him hoping he'd be the one to make her feel like this and it didn't come in the shape of her best friend. It came in the shape of this older man with strange tangled hair and a distant persona.

Even if her eyes weren't on him she could feel his directly upon her as she fidgeted nervously with her satchel. His mind was throbbing with all the bullet points of why this was so wrong. All the countless things he'd already noted just from watching her at a generous space. His brain screamed wrong but his body protested with all the reasons that it felt so right. Sitting here now across from her he already missed the sensation of her nestled up against his side. Something inside of him told him that it's exactly where she belonged. Another thing to add to the list of reasons this was wrong, he was a loner and that's exactly the kind of life he was meant to lead. It had always been and always would be. This was playing with a double edged razor and he knew once the pendulum dropped he would be impaled on one of the sides. Was he really thinking of taking that risk just for this flighty curious woman before him?

Yes

Yes

Yes

Yes

His body shivered and wiggled knowing the answer already but he refused to let his brain echo the words as well. Perhaps if he just kept thinking to his self…

No

No

No

No…..

Merlin's beard it was a hopeless cause.

Sipping idly on his coffee still watching her avoiding him with trembling fingers he knew that he would fall into her and crawl through all the worst things imaginable just to keep her near him. If she would let him he would trade every moral he had just to keep replicating this sensation flooding through his entire being. Rationally he knew it would tear him in two in the end but it was a risk he was yet again willing to take, but would she be willing to take it too?

How could she ever want someone like him too?