A/N: this chapter is going to be pretty long thanks to all those who review!
Joe: ALRIGHT!!!! PIZZA!!!!!
Ummm Joe…. We're on the air…
Joe: what? Oh! Oh! Ok! Ummm uuuh first up is…. Ah here we go my friend lucario22
Lucario: sup?
Joe: not much…
Lucario: hey can I have some of that pizza?
Joe: uh yeah sure! Oh wait that reminds me! You know how now Shadowshinobi57 has a guitar guy for his Q&A? well now I have a cook! Krizz Fizz!
Krizz: sup?
Lucario: not much just eating pizza….
Joe: I think we better get on with the questions…
Lucario: ok here we go…
To Krystal & Joe: Battle of minds! If Krystal tries to read yours, can you block her?
Joe: of course I can… watch
Krystal tries to read Joes mind but gets blocked out then she faints from straining herself
Joe: Dammit Krystal! You need to learn when to give up!
To Fox: Who do you like the most between Fay and Miyu? Assuming that Krystal never existed and it was the most important choice of your life.
Fox: uuuuh aaaaah well do I have to answer?
Joe: yes
Fox(whispering to Lucario): Miyu…
Lucario(out loud): what!? Miyu!?
Fox: Dammit! Why'd you say it out loud?!!?
Lucario: cuz its fun and that what I do…
To Marcus: Do you have many girlfriends?
Marcus:
ummmm uuuh…. You'll find out for yourself after the next chapter
of Shadows of the Past….
To Marcus: You're so cute! Can I take a
picture please?
Marcus:
since you put this review before the last chapter I'll let you off
this time by telling you… I'm 14!
To Leon: Do you think
yourself as an evil genius or a master of crime?
Leon: Evil Genius
Panther: what's 2+2 then?
Leon: uuuh… ummm… fish?
Panther: that proves my point.
To Falco: Dance with Katt!
Falco:
Joe: wait are those two still in the bedroom?
Everyone else: YUP!
Joe knocks on the door to the bedroom… the two newlyweds finally come out
Joe: DAMN you guys took two days in there…. NOW ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!
Falco:
ok ok! (he
dances with Katt)
To
Krystal: What would you say to a chocolate chip cookie?
Krystal wakes up
Krystal: COOKIE!!!!!
She
grabs the cookie and starts eating it ferociously
To
Fox, Marcus and Katt: Same question as Krystal.
Fox, Marcus and Katt: ok!
They each take a cookie and eat it.
Lucario: That's all for now, but I've still got loads! Prepare for more!
Joe: Alright! Now next up is Shadow with a little surprise for everyone. MUA HA HA HA HA….
To everyone: I'll reverse things today. First...(snaps his fingers. Nothing happens). So...Thank you for volunteering in my simulation. in this segment, you will be put through not so cruel but very unusual tortures or fortunes, depending on who you are and how you are treated. None of this will be permanent, as you will see later. And I will have to ask Joe not to interfere. I will revert things back to normal after all this.
Everyone: We're scared
Joe: I won't interfere…
To Fox: Pretty much everyone in Lylat adores you. You're smart, resourceful, and above all, not a bad sight for the ladies regarding your physical fitness, as I can tell with your lovely lady Krystal.
Fox: uuuh thanks I guess….
To Krystal: And I do mean that. You do look ravishing today.
Krystal: Thank you!
To Fox: So, back to my point. Now, of all the reasons I have listed above, I can only see fit to change the most important, at least in my views...The fitness. (Brings up a machine) Now, everyone knows broccoli is healthy vegetable choice. At least, before I changed it. This machine houses genetically altered broccoli which does the exact opposite, and at a very swift pace I might add. (Shoves the tube of the machine in Fox's mouth and locks it.) So, now that we...Oh damn. Metal! Strap him to the chair. (Metal runs in, plays a quick guitar solo and the harnesses are locked) Now that that's taken care of...I just have to flip the switch, and the blended anti-broccoli, as we'll call it, will flow down into your stomach. And to make sure of an efficient job, this mixture will be automatically absorbed into your bloodstream. Enjoy. (He flips the switch. The green fluid flows down the tube and down his throat. Small changes could already be seen, as his muscles slowly recede and his stomach becomes more of a pot belly.)
Fox: MFWAH!!! MFWAH!!!!
To Krystal: And of course, the lovely Krystal. So, if I had to guess, I would have to do something similar to Fox's...But I can't seem to think of anything like it. So, we'll do something more humiliating than scarring. This won't hurt a bit. (He shoots her with a dart. It hits her neck) That was a truth serum dart. You'll have no choice but o say your deepest darkest secrets. So...What's you ultimate fantasy?
Krystal: to have Fox
sorry we are having technical difficulties be back in just a moment. Back.
Krystal: With whip crème….
To Krystal: Interesting. Enjoy the secret sharing!
Krystal: oh and… everyone ignores her…
To Falco: And you...The avian meathead that SO MANY fangirls crave. Let's see here...Your qualities are strength, charm, and apparently a way of keeping women in bed. That in mind, what would happen if I took all that away? (Snaps his fingers. Falco's clothes change into ones similar to Slippy's. He now has a huge pair of glasses and a nerdy hat on) Now your qualities are intelligence, the ability to name all the planets from Star Wars, and above all, the ownership of a LVL 60 Dragon Sage in D&D. Excelsior much?
Falco (nasally voice): excelsior!!!
To Katt: Not very appeasing now, is he? For yours...Let me think...A fur color change might work, since you seem to change it a lot. (Snaps his fingers. Her fur color changes to a three color sunburst effect. The colors are red, green and blue) Really, that's all I got for yours. Enjoy.
Katt: AAAAH my beautiful fur!!!!
To Peppy: Your one of the lucky few who get off easy. So long as you keep the baby pictures away, you're in the clear. Have some carrot cake.
Peppy: YIPPY
he eats the carrot cake… hey why can't I have any carrot cake?
Joe: 'cause you're the narrator and you don't really exist…
To Slippy: I also spare you, since you're the main target. Have a pie.
Slippy: YAY!!!!
To Marcus: I can't honestly hurt you. I'm not saying you're young, but you're only 14. Maybe if you were older...Wait...On second thought, I got something for you. (Snaps his fingers. Marcus is now 50) Older than your dad...I can't imagine how awkward that would be.
Marcus: uuh oh man this sucks…
To Wolf: You sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick bastard. I saved a good one for you. The paper airplane thing isn't good enough...So...(Snaps his fingers. 10 clones of Fox stood in line with pies in hand. Wolf is tied up to a spinning wheel) Since you can't stand Fox defeating you, utterly stripping you of your pride is much better. Enjoy.
Wolf: RAAAAAAAH!!!!!!
To Leon: You're another fortunate soul of whom I will not harm. Instead, I will give you what your heart most desires. (Snaps his fingers. A female chameleon walks up to Leon and beckons him to the bedroom) Enjoy.
Leon: thank you… I will…
He walks to the bedroom
To Panther: And now, it's you. To be frank, the only tortures I can think of for you are sexual. And why? 'Cause your a perv. So, how about we do something a bit odd? (Snaps his fingers. Panther is then locked in a box full of his fangirls...but not just any fangirls. The ones who have a tail fetish) These gals will keep pulling your tail until...Well, either they reach climax, or you end up without it. Enjoy.
Panther: OW!!! HEY DON'T TOUCH MY TAIL!!! OWWW!!!!!
To Fay and Miyu: You guys are always together. So, you will share this. (Snaps his fingers. Nothing seems to happen) You may think nothing happened...But, in reality, you guys switched bodies. Fay is Miyu, and Miyu is Fay. BOOM, BABY! Enjoy.
Miyu/Fay: wah?
Fay/Miyu: AAAAAHHH!!!
To Bill: And now you. ...Can't think of anything. DAMN IT! Guess you're off the hook...Here, have a cookie.
Bill: thanks I guess…
To Joe: So, if you didn't interfere, thank you.
Joe: you didn't get too outa hand so I'll let you off the hook this time…
To everyone: Now! (He snaps his fingers, and everything goes back to normal) Thank you for participating in this simulation. Had this been a real torture, Fox would've been an unfit slob, Krystal would've REALLY shared her secrets, Falco would've been a nerd, Katt would've looked like the finger paintings that a kindergardener would've created, Marcus would've been older than his dad by about 20 years, Wolf would've been covered in pie from 100 clones of Fox, Panther would've had his tail raped and nearly ripped off, and Fay and miyu would've been stuck in each other's bodies. However, the desserts I gave the others are real, including the lizard currently banging Leon. So now...(He throws sunglasses to Peppy, Slippy, Bill, and Joe. He put on the pair he had, then flashed the memory eraser from MIB) Excellent.
Everyone (except the ones with the sunglasses on): what happened?
Joe: oh nothing…
To Joe: That's why I didn't want you to interfere. It was merely a test of my torturous mind. How do you think it went?
Joe: quite well actually…
To everyone: Thanks for being prodigious throughout this! Don't stop now! JA MATA!!
Everyone (except the ones with the sunglasses on): What are you talking about? Ok bye…
Joe: anyways now next up is Hakkyou… ah this weird gay guy gets on my nerves guess We'll answer his questions anyways…
To Joe: So... In relation to my PM: Sorry about the whole 'furry' thing. One thing *coughthefactthatyousaythatyou'reafoxinShadow'sQ&Acough* led me to believe another, and things got mixed up. Actually, it's your fault! APOLOGIZE! (Just kidding. But honestly...)
Joe: yeah yeah quit your griping about it k? its over with… oh and in the world of Fan Fiction you can be or do whatever you want…
To Fox: Err... How's your erectile dysfunction?
Fox:
wrong Q&A that's Q&A Happy times gimmick…
To Krystal:
What?! He really DOES have E.D??!! I thought the tears were a joke!!
Krystal:
still wrong Q&A…
To Slippy: You know, I like you better when
people make you normal. Which is what I'm gonna do in my story. You
ARE going to be a bit nerdy, but not much...
Slippy:
Errr… ok whatever….
To Falco: I don't like YOU though. How are
the seventeen children? (leer)
Falco: DON'T YOU LEER AT ME!!!! What seventeen children?
To Peppy: Do a barrel roll... (Flaps his arms un-energetically. I'm tired today, big whoop, want to fight about it?)
Peppy: uuuh… try hovering! If you don't know how to hover boost! If you don't know how to boost use the brakes!!!
To Shadow: Oh, yeah, that quote isn't even yours! I just recently remembered it's from Family Guy.
Shadow:
errr whatever…
To Katt: Hmm... Err... Make me a sandwich?
Katt: uuuh how about….. NO!!!!!
To Velk: Err, right, thanks... Also, I don't 'cuss'. I SWEAR. SSWWEEAARR! WHY does everyone say 'cuss'?? What, is it still the 1970's? NO IT'S NOT!! I WILL SWEAR AS MUCH AS I FUCKING WANT!! Although, I consider not 'cussing' at you...Tch. I hate that word..
Velk: what are you talking about?
Joe: Velk… who let you back in?
Velk: that Rat over there…
Joe: okay….
To Wolf: How did YOU lose your eye? All of the other ones have their stories...
Wolf: lost my eye because (mumbling)
Hakkyou: what? I can't hear you…
Wolf: I lost my eye because I tripped and fell on a pickle…
Joe: ok… I'm not gonna laugh… ok yes I am HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!
Hakkyou:
(gasping between laughing fits) you… ha ha ha! You dumb ass!!!!
To
Panther: Well, not a question, but I dare you to sing "The hills
are alive with the sound of pants". it's pretty much "The
Hills Are Alive With The Sound of Music", but with pants instead
of music.
Panther: wha?
To Leon: Err... Are you a test-tube baby?
Leon:
Joe: he's still in the bedroom…
To
Joe: When you say something more sadistic than anything I've ever
written... You don't know what you're in for. Give me your best shot,
and I'll see if it's good. Honestly, you're...er, what am I ranting
about? I don't care... I'm tired... I demand a bed!! I WANT MY SLEEP!
Oh, and saying that I'm a "cum guzzler" is extremely
redundant. Just wanna say. REDUNDANCY...
Wanna play a game? (Mr.
Saw and Hakkyou begin playing 'Patty-Cake'. ohohohoho! Mr. Connery,
your words are your funniest aspect!)
Joe: you know Hakkyou… you're a gay retard… now LEAVE!!!!
Hakkyou: ok…
Joe: ok… next up is… Ninja560!!
To everyone: Hi meet my Q&A's Fox and Krystals 14 year old trouble making daughter Liz.
Liz: err… hi?
Everyone: uh hi…
To everyone: DIE DIE EVERYONE JUST DIE AH!
Everyone: uuuh no?
To everyone: Another sene from Higurshi when Rika snaps.
Everyone: ugh not again…
To Fox: I didn't crash your arwing here is the keys.
Fox: ok thanks!
To Joe: Do you like Kingdom Hearts.
Joe: SURE DO!!!
To Marcus: You just won a free car.
Marcus: YIPPIE!!!
To Fox: I know he isn't old enough to drive yet but he can wait.
Fox: err ok…
To Krystal: can I rub your tail?
Krystal: err sure…
William(Ninjas real name): oooh soft!
to Joe: I have 84 pies one of those doors and the others go to Japan and a black hole.
Joe chooses the door with the black hole and harnesses the energy from it forming a sword from its massive energy…
Joe: thanks to ninja I now have a new weapon in my arsenal! The Blade of the unforgiving BLACK HOLE!!!!!
To Marcus: BLIZZARD!!
Marcus: Where?
To everyone: I have to go bye.
Everyone: bye!
Joe: ok next up is that anon reviewer again… ADAM!!!
Adam:...My idea of russian roulette involves pressing the trigger once at him. Then game over. Not to mention I rigged it to win...
Joe: here cheating will not be tolerated and all unfair games will be turned fair…
To Leon: *shoots*
Leon:
Joe: he's still in the bedroom… one more violation and you'll be kicked out…
To Fox: Why?
Fox: why you askin' me?
To Krystal: Why did he do that?
Krystal: don't ask me…
To Wolf: WHY, MAN. WHY?
Wolf: … would you shut up?
To Fox: You whore.
Fox: wha?
Joe: that's your last violation Adam you won't be allowed here for two chapters
Adam: dammit…
Joe: ok! Those are all the questions we have for today but we have a big Finale for you!
His hands start to glow with shadow energy and a drum set an electric guitar and a bass appear Joe takes the Bass gives the electric guitar to Shadow and Krizz takes the drums…
Joe: ALRIGHT tonight we're going to be playing "Tears Don't Fall" by Bullet For My Valentine!
Joe: ARE YOU GUYS READY TO ROCK THE SHADOWS???!!!
Shadow: YEAH!!!
Krizz: HELL YEAH!!!
Joe takes up the microphone… a stage appears and they are now in a stadium with a bunch of fans
Joe: Let's go!!!
With blood shot eyes, I watch you sleeping
The warmth I feel beside me is slowly fading
Would she hear me, if I called her name?
Would she hold me, if she knew my shame?
The stage stars glowing with a dark aurora
There's always something different going on
The path I walk is in the wrong direction
There's always someone fucking hanging on
Can anybody help me make things better?
A burst of energy flies throughout the stadium causing everyone to feel a rush of darkness that was strangely satisfying.
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come home
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come home
The atmosphere in the stadium starts to change a feeling of insanity starts to come over the room.
The moments died, I hear no screaming
The visions left inside me are slowly fading
Would she hear me, if I called her name?
Would she hold me, if she knew my shame?
The stadium gets dark then a slow and steady solo can be heard the lights come back on
There's always something different going on
The path I walk is in the wrong direction
There's always someone fucking hanging on
Can anybody help me make things better?
The same burst of energy from before goes throughout the stadium
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come home
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come home
A Bass solo is heard and slowly a guitar riff starts up the vocals start to get louder
This battered room I've seen before
The broken bones they heal no more, no more
With my last breath I'm choking
Will this ever end I'm hoping
My world is over one more time!!!
Let's go!!!
Would she hear me, if I called her name?
Would she hold me, if she knew my shame?
There's always something different going on
The path I walk is in the wrong direction
There's always someone fucking hanging on
Can anybody help me make things better?
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come home
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me (tears don't fall)
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come (conscience calls)
The atmosphere changes to one of remorse and a feeling of sorrow
Your tears don't fall, they crash around me
Her conscious calls, the guilty to come home (conscience calls)
The song ends and the instruments disappear…
The feeling in the room returns to normal the stadium disappears but the room now has an audience seating area…
Joe: so how'd you guys like this episode of Q&A in the Shadows?
Everyone: AWSOME!!!
Joe: well that's all we have! See ya!
Joe: oh wait heh heh forgot to tell ya! Next chapter We'll be inviting Andrew, Andross, and Dash Oikeny to the show see ya!
A/N: HEY HEY HEY! How'd you like the surprise? The song? The awesomeness? Please leave your questions!!!