Kiki was milking the cows when she heard the door open.

"Kiki?"

"Cam? I'm milking the cows." He walked over and stood next to her. "What are you doing here? It's like six in the morning."

"I wanted to see you."

"That's very sweet. Don't you leave this morning?"

"Yes, the train is at eight."

Kiki stood and moved her pail of milk so the cow wouldn't kick it over and then she wiped her hands. She looked at him. "You look nervous."

"Yeah. I..um…" he stammered and took a few steps toward her. "Is there anyone else in here?"

"No."

He moved even closer and took her hands in his. "I decided that I'm going to send you a telegram instead of a letter. It's quicker."

"But it costs more money."

"I don't care. You're worth it."

"Is that what you wanted to tell me?"

His green eyes searched hers for a moment before bending down and kissing her cheek. "Goodbye, Kylie. I'll see you soon." He smiled and then ran out the door.

"Was that Cam I saw running out the door?" Jack asked.

"Yes, sir." Her cheeks heated.

"He was in a hurry."

"Yes, sir." Jack stared at his daughter, who seemed to be frozen in place.

"You ok?"

"Yes, sir."

"Ok, why don't you head in with that pail and I'll finish the other cow."

"Yes, sir." Jack chuckled as she left in her daze. Girls still baffled him after many years of raising them, but they were the loves of his life. Every one of them.

…..

"Abbie, he came all the way to the ranch to tell me he was going to send a telegram instead of a letter. At six o'clock in the morning! Then he kissed my cheek!" Kiki sighed and laid down on the just made bed in room 2.

"Kiki, I just made that bed."

"Aren't you happy for me?"

"Of course."

"But…?"

"Nothing. Are you going to help me? I need to do bedding in room 3 too. The new guests come in about an hour."

Kiki helped as she promised she would but she was disappointed in Abbie's reaction. Her best friend was supposed to be happy but instead she was avoiding the subject.

Abbie was jealous of her sister, plain and simple, and it didn't make any sense. It wasn't that she wanted Cam for herself, and Abbie was living her dream. She owned the boarding house and it kept her busy from morning until night if she had guests. She wanted more though. She wanted love. She wanted to feel what Kiki was feeling and the rest of her older siblings.

After they were done, Kiki left and went to Carlie's.

Kiki knocked on her older sister's door. "Come in," she called.

Kiki walked in and was immediately attacked by five year old Ellie and three year old Edward, who they called Eddie. "Hey there, guys."

"Aunt Kiki! Will you read to us?"

"Sure." Kiki sat down and her niece and nephew climbed up next to her.

Carlie wandered out, waddling as she came, and sat down in a chair. "Good grief. Thank goodness you are here."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm two weeks from my due date and I feel like I'm a month over due."

"Do you need me to help with something?"

"Maybe just watch the kids while I try to sleep? I'm so tired."

"Sure. Go take a nap."

"Thank you so much." Carlie stood up after three tries and looked at Ellie and Eddie. "You two listen to Aunt Kiki."

"Yes, Mama."

…..

Cam sat in their train compartment, staring out the window. He was oblivious to the sounds of Jilly reading from her book. He didn't hear Samuel crying or his Mom singing to him. He was thinking of Kiki and how much he would rather be there with her and not on his way to Alberta.

It wasn't that he didn't want to see his Grandma. He just wanted to be home.

Cam knew that holding her hand and kissing her cheek may have been too soon in a lot of people's eyes but it felt like it was time. He knew that a real kiss would need to wait for awhile. They were only fourteen. However, he could already envision them getting engaged in a few years and then married once he finished college. He could see her standing with him after his medical school graduation, a proud and beautiful wife.

It was all overwhelming and wonderful and it was in his heart. She was in his heart.

"Cam? Are you ok?" Jenny asked.

"Sure."

"You're awfully quiet."

"I think he's missing a certain young lady," Jon told her.

"Oh. Well, we won't be gone too long."

"I expect the way he's feeling, one day is too long." Jon sat next to Jenny on the couch and wrapped his arm around his wife.

"Is that how you felt?" she asked with a smile.

"Yes. Any minute I'm away from you, is one minute too long, Jen Beckley."

Cam effectively shut his ears off. Their affection toward each other was making him miss Kiki even more. He had a feeling it was going to feel like forever until he could see her again.

…..

CHRISTMAS EVE

Everyone gathered at Jack and Elizabeth's home for dinner as they did every year, including Kevin.

Sara knew that it was going to be extremely hard for him without her Mom there so she insisted he join them.

She walked across the newly fallen snow on his arm.

"You ok, Daddy?"

"Sure."

"I'm here. Just remember I'm with you."

They stopped walking and he kissed her forehead. "Thank you, sweetheart." He figured she would much rather be on Jay's arm than his but she insisted. "Where's Jay?"

"At home. He will be glad you are coming too."

"Sweetheart, I really think I need to be at home."

"Daddy, I know this is hard, but I think that being with family and friends will help."

"I just…I am going to go back." He kissed her cheek. "I love you. I will see you later."

She walked the rest of the way across the field to the Thornton's by herself. When she walked in, Jay met her at the door. "Hey, sweetie. Where's your dad?" He kissed her softly and looked in her eyes.

"He is struggling, Jay. He wanted to be alone but I think he is just missing Mom. I might go back home to be with him."

"I'll come too."

"Jay, your family wants to see you. You just got home."

"You are my family now too and that includes your dad. I will be here tomorrow night."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Let me go tell my mom and dad."

…

About twenty minutes later, they arrived back at her house, ready to cook Kevin some dinner. What they didn't expect was finding him sobbing in the living room.

"Dad?"

"Sara, what are you doing here?" He wiped his cheeks and turned to blow his nose.

"We are here to cook you dinner and be with you."

"Sweetie, I'm not good company tonight."

"Of course you are. I am going to go make dinner."

Jay sat down on the couch and looked at his future father-in-law. "Kevin? How are you doing?"

Kevin sat down and shook his head. "I am missing Maggie with everything I have."

"I can only imagine."

"She was wonderful and beautiful and strong."

"Much like Sara," Jay told him. He couldn't imagine ever losing Sara. He knew one day it would happen but hopefully not for like fifty years.

"I fell in love with Maggie the first time I saw her. I tried to fool myself into thinking we could just be friends but that didn't last long." Kevin sat and stared at the empty fireplace. "I am glad that Sara has you, Jay. It makes me feel better knowing she will have someone to take care of her."

"Kevin, I am going to settle here after I graduate. She and I will both be here."

Jay got the feeling that Kevin was giving up. He couldn't let that happen. "Sara needs you, Kevin, and I am looking forward to having you as my father-in-law."

"Jay, I…"

"Supper should be ready soon," Sara told them in a cheerful voice.

Jay watched him the rest of the evening. He was definitely struggling and that worried Jay a lot. So much that he couldn't sleep. He lay awake forcing himself not to think that Kevin might harm himself. To just remember that he was only missing his wife. It was normal for him to be sad.

Jay wandered downstairs about five o'clock and started the coffee.

"Jay? You are up awfully early."

"Yeah." Jack walked up to him and patted his shoulder.

"How did last night go?"

"I don't know. I'm worried."

"About Sara?"

"No, Kevin. We got there and he was sobbing, which makes sense because of Maggie, but then he starts telling me that he is grateful Sara has me because she will have someone to take care of her. Dad, I don't want to think it, but what if he does something to himself? He's giving up."

"I will go see him. Do you want to come?"

"Yes, please."

Jack hugged Jay. "You are a good man, Jay."

"Dad, I can't imagine what he is dealing with. If I lost Sara…"

"I know. Believe me, it seems impossible to think of losing your mother. I don't let myself think that way because I don't want to live my life in fear of what might happen."

"I don't either, it's just on my mind right now."

"Just make sure you let her know how much you love her every chance you get."

"I will."

"Set a date yet?"

"End of June, I think. That way I will be done with school. We just need to figure out where we will live."

…

Jack and Jay headed over after breakfast. Jack suggested that he talk to him first so he didn't feel overwhelmed.

Jay headed into the kitchen to see if Sara was in there. "Hey, beautiful."

Sara turned from the sink and gave him a smile. "Hey, I didn't expect to see you until later."

"Yeah, I came with Dad. He wanted to talk to Kevin." Jay walked over behind her and slipped his arms around her waist. "I love you, Sara."

"I know." She kissed his cheek and leaned back into him. "I love you too." He loved that she fit perfectly in his arms. He wished that he could hold her forever. "Jay, is something wrong?"

"No, I just…this whole thing with your dad and your mom…it makes me sad and I don't want to keep thinking about it, but it makes me worry about losing you."

"I'm not leaving you."

"I'm sure your Mom didn't plan on leaving your Dad, or Papa didn't plan on leaving my Grandma either."

"No, I suppose not. Things happen, but don't you think it's important to just appreciate the people we love and make sure they know we love them, rather than worry about when something bad will happen?"

He nodded and then pulled her into his arms again. "Yeah."

"Jay? Where are we going to live when we get married?"

"Well, I don't have the skill to build a house. Dad said we could rent the house on the edge of town. The one that Maddie and Nate lived in and Dr. Beckley and Jenny. It's vacant and he said that he would add on an office for me so that I could work from home."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Does that sound ok? We would only be a mile from your Dad."

"Yeah. Let's go see it."

"Right now?"

"Maybe a little later." Right now, she just wanted him to hold her.

…..

"Jack, I appreciate you stopping by. Last night was very hard. I'm sorry that I worried Jay."

"We want you and Sara to come by for dinner tonight. You are family already with Caleb and Amy being married and now we will be again. We really want you there."

"Ok. I will be there."

The men walked out into the kitchen to find a very cozy Jay and Sara. Kevin smiled at Jack and cleared his throat. The young couple turned and smiled, their cheeks rosy. "Hey, you two."

"Dad, we are going to go see the house in a few minutes. Can I borrow the key?"

"Sure." He pulled a few keys from his pocket and handed one to Jay. He had a feeling that they would be anxious to see it.

"Thanks."

Kevin walked over to Jay. "Jay, I just wanted to thank you for being so worried about me. I also want to say that I am sorry too. Some days are really hard and I am grateful that I have you and Jack here, and of course Sara, to help me when that happens." Kevin held his hand out and shook Jay's. "I am looking forward to having another Thornton as my son. It seems right, doesn't it?"

"Yes, sir." Jay smiled and kissed Sara's cheek. "Just right."

….

"Jay, this is perfect. Three bedrooms is a good size."

"Yeah, should be, for a while."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we could have lots of babies and then we would need a bigger house."

"Just how many babies are you wanting, Mr. Thornton?"

"Oh, I don't know. A dozen or so."

"Uh, no. I really don't want a dozen or so."

"Two dozen?" he teased, knowing she would be ok with whatever they were blessed with.

"Very funny. If you want two dozen, we best get started." She waited for his reaction.

"Uh…I uh…I am ok with starting soon but…"

"Oh, sweetie. Relax. I was completely kidding."

His cheeks turned red and he nodded, laughing along with her at his bumbling.

"Show me where the office will be."

He took her outside. "Dad's going to put a separate entrance over here. I basically just need a place to put my desk and a locked cabinet for my patient files."

"I like the idea of you being close by during the day."

"Me too."

"I mean if I need your help with those two dozen children, I can just yell and you'll come back home."

"Yeah yeah. Very funny."