November 8th 1992

Dear Friend,

It's getting really cold now and I think snow might be coming soon. It makes me excited because I know the sooner winter comes the sooner I'll see Sam and Patrick again. I'm even excited for my birthday because it means I can give Mom her present.

I've been taking a lot of walks lately. It helps me think and not in the bad way. I think about what I want to write next in my novel. Even seeing kids in the neighbourhood playing around with a ball sometimes it gives me more ideas of what to write. I think it's also nice just to have the cold wind against my face. Sometimes, a walk is enough. Not for anything specifically, but it's just enough.

Today when I was on my walk I saw a girl in a grey coat in front of me and I could tell by the streak of purple in her long hair that it was Diana. I hadn't seen her since the party. I called to her and she turned to me and looked embarrassed.

"Hi Charlie," she said, not quite looking me in the eye when I caught up to her.

"How are you feeling?"

"A lot better than yesterday. I'm really sorry I got so drunk."

"It's okay."

"No, I'm really, really sorry."

"It's fine Diana, Patrick didn't mind."

"But I'm so embarrassed, it wasn't meant to happen. I promised myself I wouldn't do it."

"I didn't look out for you,"

"You didn't have to. You had friends to talk to, and I tried making friends by getting hammered. God, I'm so stupid!"

I didn't know how to tell her that I didn't mind, so I did the first thing I could think of and asked if she wanted to have lunch with me at the Big Boy. She thought for a long time.

"Why do you want to be my friend, Charlie?"

"I like you,"

"You're not going to like me later."

"I like you now."

"What do you like about me?"

"I don't want you to be alone."

I know it wasn't what she asked but I meant what I said. For the past week I have known her I could tell she didn't find it easy to talk to people and start making friends. I didn't want it to stay like that for her because I know how horrible it is.

She didn't talk for a long time again until she looked at her watch and said,

"I have to get groceries. I'll be at the Big Boy at 1:30." Then she jogged off.

When I came home I asked Dad if I could borrow his truck again.

"Is it for a girlfriend?"

"No,"

"What's it for?"

"I'm having lunch with a friend,"

"Who?"

"Diana,"

"The girl you took to the party?"

"Yes,"

He asked the same questions like he did when I was going out with Mary Elizabeth. But I really did try telling him this time that I wasn't going out with her. Dad seemed to believe me this time.

Diana was already at the Big Boy by the time I got there. She seemed happier this time and she dressed a bit differently than when I saw her this morning.

I think what I really like about Diana is she is always different from the other day I see her. For instance, one day she would be wearing a really nice yellow dress with a white cardigan, a pink headband and no make-up and the next day she would wear patterned legwarmers, a skirt, a hooded jacket, runners, and her hair would be tied up and she would wear darker eye shadow and lipstick. The same would happen with the music she listens to. One day she would love 'Joan Jett and the Blackhearts' and then the next day she would love 'Fleetwood Mac'. But she said that there was one thing that never changed about her, and that was her love for the piano. I would like to hear her play one day because by the sound of it she really does enjoy it.

When we were finished I walked her home while I was surprisingly doing most of the talking. I hope she didn't mind. She just smiled the whole time. Once we arrived at her house she introduced me to her little sister who made hand signs instead of talking. Then Diana explained to me that her little sister was def.

"Charlie, I'm sorry about earlier today." she said when her sister went back inside.

"It's okay," I said.

"I don't want to push you away, I don't mean to."

"I know you don't. I just hope you're okay."

"You know what, I'm not, but I will be one day."

Then she hugged me, for a long time as well, and said "See you at school,"

Love always,
Charlie