Hell's Bells

Uncanny

He never did get enough credit for his uncanny ability to keep his sanity around her, even during her time of the month. Yes, that's right. Even then. His ability-his patience- he needed them now more than ever as she sat on the glass floor, screaming every offensive word in her alarmingly large vocabulary at him as she watched her friends get carried away to some prison. He didn't even so much as wince when she kneed him in the groin for the third time. He simply stood by her, trying to come up with some calming words for her.

"Vincent, you idiot! Why'd you come and get me? You should have gotten them! You're such a frickin'… Ugh! You're so much like it that I can't even think of the word!" She banged her fists against the glass floor. "You aren't even doing anything! You're just… Standing there! Do I need to kick you in the crotch again? 'Cause I'd be more than happy to you… You… Ugh! What's the word!?" She screamed and punched his left leg.

"… You shouldn't be so angry, Yuffie. They'll be fine."

"Oh, well, that's easy for you to say," She stood up and wrapped part of his cape around her for a proper imitation. "Hey, I'm Vincent!" She said in her best attempt at a deep, stern voice. "I'm not worried about Spike butt or Teefs at all because I'm practically immortal and I like to fly through the sky sweeping young girls out of motorcycles, because I think I'm so cool. And I also like to stand in dark corners not sayin' anything at all, because I'm just so cool like that. And apparently I like getting kicked in the crotch because I don't do anything when it happens to me. I also smell like blood and other gross things, and my hair, though cool is all tangled and feels like-" She caught herself from finishing her sentence and slipped out from under his cloak.

"Nicely done, Yuffie. You should be nominated for that performance."

"Not bad, huh?" She said as a smile spread across her face.

"Good." He said as he calmly walked closer to the large window of the airship.

"Good…? Hey! I'm not smiling because of you! It's because…" Her eyes wondered around the room, desperately searching for something to say. "Because I noticed that it doesn't smell like cigarettes and hard liquor in here anymore! Yeah, that's it!" Vincent smirked.

"Come over here, by me." He said. She stood there a moment before nervously walking over to his side. "Whaddya want now?" She said, trying to sound like she didn't care.

"Nothing, really." His answer left Yuffie dumbfounded.

"Nothing? You're wasting my time! I have better things to do than stare out a window at a boring old sunset that happens every single day!"

"Go on and do those other things then, Yuffie." She placed her hands on her hips and glared at him slightly, not from any anger towards him, but towards herself, because she really didn't have anything better to do. She could stand there for hours and not want to do anything else. But she wasn't about to let him know that.

"Fine then. I will." She took a few steps away from him and stopped. Look at him. He's just… Standing there! He's so dull! He's a man that appreciates beautiful things! He's such a pansy! And the worst part is he's better at cool stunts than a stunt man! He can jump rooftop to frickin' rooftop while firing shots at something eight times his size, and here he is, staring out a window looking like he's in love with the boring ol' ocean and the plain ol' sky, when he could be doing something so much more exciting! I can't leave, he needs someone to make his life entertaining, like me. Yeah, that's it. She walked back to his side.

"Finished with your 'other things'?" He asked her, not taking his eyes off of the view.

"No. I'm doing one of them right now."

"Which would be…?"

"Can't tell ya. It's top-secret. But, I can tell ya that…" She looked side to side to see if anyone was listening to their conversation, and quietly said "You need me."

"Oh, I do?"

"Totally." She placed her hands on her hips and smiled. "Without me, you'd be so boring. I balance out your boring-ness with my awesome-ness. Boring-ness divided by awesome-ness equals a semi-awesome pair."

"I see…" Vincent said, playing along. "So without you I suppose I wouldn't do much, right?"

"Right." Yuffie said, nodding wisely. "Of course, it would make me a little less cool, but I'm willing to sacrifice that for us," she took a deep breathe and firmly placed her hand on his left shoulder, "Don't worry, Vinnie. I'll fix ya."

Hours later, near midnight, Yuffie was still wide awake, sitting on the clear glass floor of Cid's prized airship, The Shera #2. She was tremendously exhausted from the day's adventures, but she found it very difficult to sleep with motion sickness.

"Ugh…" She moaned loudly, falling backwards onto the floor.

Not only was Yuffie air sick, but she had another crisis as well.

She was completely and utterly bored out of her mind.

"UGH! SOMETHING HAPPEN!" She shouted with complete disregard of the sleeping staff on Cid's airship. As if on cue, the ship began to shake violently, sending Yuffie back and forth across the room, struggling to regain her balance.

"You guys! You're supposed to protect me! GET WITH THE PROGRAM!" She shrieked.

Just then, Cid and his crew shuffled out of their beds and sleepily but quickly got into their positions.

"I want every god-dang engine checked!" Cid hollered with an unlit cigarette in his mouth. "Dangit! I can't light my cigarette!" He slid across the floor, struggling to make his way up the stairway to the ship's wheel.

Yuffie desperately clung onto a windowsill near the front of the ship.

"Captain, the ship's under attack!" A crew member exclaimed,

Suddenly, marriage doesn't sound so bad…

Alright! Summer vacation is here which means, more writing! Yay! I have returned my love! Chapter five should be up immediately after this, with any luck.

Now, I know that Cid is a normal potty-mouth, but I'm trying to avoid bad language to keep the rating down. So, if you're unhappy with his words, feel free to mentally replace "freak" with the "f-bomb", if you really can't stand him without his language.

Constructive criticism is always greatly appreciated. (I use it, too!)

Did I end this chapter decently, or should I have kept going?

Did any of the sentences sound awkward, or irrelevant?

Do the characters seem, well, in-character?

And if you review my stories (whether it's constructive or a super awesome review just to encourage me and brighten up my day) I'll review yours. You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours! (In a literary sense, though...)

Thanks for reading!

-Lunatic.Ninja