Never Be Forgotten
Disclaimer: All is built on the fabulous work of Ronald D. Moore.
A/N: I want to give a huge thanks to my beta total-whovian.
Chapter 3
Caprica: Delphi: Colonial Fleet Academy - 3 years, 9 months and 20 days Before Cylon Holocaust
"Pilots call me Starbuck, but you may refer to me as God." Kara stood in front the class of Basic Flight at the Colonial Fleet Academy. Less than half a year ago she was the student, sitting in this exact same room, looking up at the stage. Now the roles have been reversed.
She heard someone snicker, and immediately narrowed her eyes at the poor bastard. She knew she was too young for this position. Too young and too inexperienced. It was only her talent in the cockpit, and Commander Jonasson recommendations, which had guaranteed her the position. But she was not going to let a bunch of nuggets tear her down, and she knew she had to show them who was in command from the very first day.
"What's your name?" she asked in a falsely sweet voice.
«Ethan Grant, sir. God." He burst out laughing again even though he was trying to keep a straight face.
"You think this is funny, Cadet Grant?" Kara still had the same all too sweet voice, smiling down at the nugget as she spoke.
"No, sir." He said between laughter, and some of the other students were also snickering openly. Kara kept her eyes on Grant, and ignored the others for the time being.
"You are dismissed, Cadet Grant." Kara said, still smiling. A look of confusion replaced the grin on Grant's face. "You may leave," Kara informed him. The smile on her face grew even wider as the look of confusion turned into horror on the young man's face.
"You don't mean it? You can't just flunk me!" There was a touch of desperation in his voice now. The room had grown eerily quiet. No one was laughing anymore.
"If you want to be a Viper pilot, and I take it that's the reason most of you are here, you have to pass Basic Flight. And to pass Basic Flight, I have to pass you. I don't want snickering idiots in my class." Kara's voice was no longer sweet; it was biting cold and held as much authority as she could muster.
"So either you shut your ugly month and listen to me, or you can leave. That goes for all of you!" Kara looked out over the crowed of around thirty students in front of her. "So, there is door." She pointed at the door, still looking intently from one face to another. She was no longer smiling, and neither was anyone else. "You can leave now, or do what I say! Is that clear?"
No one moved. Grant was cowering in his chair, as if he could disappear if he just got small enough. A few mumbled something in agreement.
"I said. Is. That. Clear?" Kara almost shouted, making some of the students jump in their seats.
"Yes," most of them said, louder this time.
"Yes, what?" Kara boomed.
"Yes, God!" All said as one, and Kara nodded in approval. She moved on without a pause as if nothing had happened.
"So, where was I? Major Maxwell has lectured you these past months; unfortunately, he had some health issues and is no longer fit for duty. You guys are now stuck with me for the rest of the year. I'm going to lecture you, and as I said, I have the final word on who passes at the end of the year." Kara paused and studied a clipboard in her hands, containing the notes from the retired Major. "I see Maxwell has taken you through basic Viper function, DRADIS readings and navigation codes… Seriously haven't you started the Viper simulation program yet?" She looked up from the board looking at the crowd in front of her in disbelief. A few of the nuggets shook their heads.
"Frakking great," Kara cursed under her breath. These nuggets were way behind schedule. "Have any of you nuggets even been in a Viper cockpit?" She asked aloud.
A brown haired boy at the second row raised his hand, but everyone else just stared back at her in silence. Kara cursed inwardly.
"And what's your name, cadet?" She asked the boy.
"Zak Adama, sir." He answered with a grin. Adama? Kara thought, looking at the young man one more time.
"You aren't related to Commander Adama by any chance?" She asked, not sure if she really wanted to know the answer.
"Yes, he's my father, sir." He said, but he did not seem overly excited about the fact. Frak, is this kid Lee's brother? Kara wondered in horror. Just her luck to be assigned to the class of Lee Adama's brother of all people. At least this explained why Zak had been in inside a Viper when no one else in the room had.
"Okay, you just earned yourself first round in simulation first thing tomorrow. I expect you all sharp and ready outside room 378 at 8 am tomorrow morning. It looks like we have some catching up to do. But first I'll check if Major Maxwell got the vital information on how to handle a Viper into your thick skulls."
Caprica: Delphi: The Watchtower Bar
"Oh my Gods! There she is! Starbuck!" She heard Helo's booming voice from across the room as soon as she stepped into the Tower. She briefly wondered if she was supposed to be here now that she was not a student any more. But it was the middle of the day, and the bar was nearly empty. She would leave before it got crowded. A pang of sadness stabbed her at the thought that her days at the Tower where at an end.
Kara smiled and made her way over to the table where Papercut and Helo were sitting. Papercut was still a student at the Academy, graduating next summer and she heard Helo had gotten a raptor position for the government department in Delphi. Kara was glad that two of her closest friends were still around when she suddenly found herself back in Delphi.
"I heard you pissed off a senior officer?" Papercut said as he greeted her with a hug. "Rumer has it you refused a direct order and when confronted with it, you beat the poor bastard so bad he got a concussion and had to get ten stitches."
Kara grimaced; the story was so far off it was almost funny. Yes, she had manage to piss of Commander Myron Ruth, and probably denied a direct order or two, but she had not beaten anyone. "You probably should not believe everything you hear, you know!"
"But you did face a court-martial? And were thrown off Triton?" Helo asked.
"Yes and no. That frakker Ruth did initiated a court-martial, but Commander Jonasson got him to drop the charges. But he thought Ruth would kill me, or vice versa, if I did not leave the Triton. He pulled some strings and got me the position as flight instructor here. It's probably for the best. Triton was dull. Only endless CAP's and no fun. I got stuck with all the shit work because the CAG didn't like my guts."
"You lasted three months? That has to be some kind of record!" Helo laughed and Kara threw him a deadly glare.
"Yeah, Yeah. Enough about me. What have you guys been up to? Do you like flying important government assholes from place to place?" Kara laughed as she nudge Helo with the elbow. It was Helo's time to grimace.
Kara was deeply engaged in the conversation with Helo as Papercut suddenly cut her off mid-sentence. "Kara? Do you know these guys? They are staring at you!"
Kara looked up to see a small gang that had gathered at the bar. She hadn't noticed them entering, but now she could see several of them had been in her class earlier that day. She could spot both Grant and Zak Adama amongst them.
"Frak, it's my students." She said. "I think it's time for me to leave."
She was about to stand, but before she could take her leave one of the students extracted himself from the group and confidently walked towards their table.
Zak Adama came to a stop in front of Kara, saluted sharply and then stood at attention.
"God, sir?" He asked still standing at attention. Oh, this is why I shall not be going to the Tower anymore, Kara cursed herself. I'm no longer one of them.
"At ease," she said and Zak visibly relaxed, but kept his stance with his hands on his back. "What is it, Cadet Adama?" she asked. She looked out of the corner of her eye as both Helo and Papercut reacted to the name and threw looks of renewed interest at Zak.
"Permission to speak off record, sir" Zak said, his eyes finding hers. Kara would never have guessed this was Apollo's brother by just looking at him. He was tanner, and his eyes were not clear blue like Lee's. Zak's eyes were light brown and a mix of ease and joy danced in them, and she could not see anything of the calculating intensity that his brother had.
"Permission granted. You may as well sit down." She said nodding towards the empty chair between her and Papercut. Zak threw a fast glance back towards the group of friends he came in with, but sat down and when he faced Kara again a bright smile lit up his face.
"I just wanted you to know I don't want any special treatment because of my father." He said bluntly, taking Kara by surprise. That was not what she expected Zak Adama to come over and say to her.
Kara narrowed her eyes at him. "Done. I would never do that." She said honestly.
Zak smiled. "Yeah, I thought so. You don't seem like the type. But I really didn't want you to believe that I wanted to use my name nor my father's to gain some kind of advantage. I've experienced it too many times how people change when they find out who my father is."
Kara studied him for a moment. She realised that growing up in the shadow of a famous parent must have its disadvantages. She remembered what Lee had said: "My dad and I… We have had our ups and downs." Kara wondered if Lee too had met the same challenges as Zak, being the son of William Adama.
"You won't from me, Zak." She promised, using his first name instead of the Adama-name on purpose.
"Thank you, Starbuck!" Zak said and was about to leave when he seemed to think better of it, turned around and said "And thank you for beating my brother at flying. He needed to be taken down a notch!"
Kara smiled genuinely back at Zak as he waved and walked away to join the others at the bar. I think I can come to like this Adama, she thought to herself.
Caprica Delphi: Local Pyramid court - 3 years, 8 months and 21 days Before Cylon Holocaust
The next month went by in a blur. Kara was set on making her nuggets ready for half year evaluation, and was pushing both herself and her students hard to make up for the lost progression with Major Maxwell. She found herself enjoying working as a flight instructor far more than she had anticipated when getting the job.
After the first day at the Tower Kara had stuck to the Sentinel's Bar on her free time. She often met Papercut there, and Helo came over whenever he had time off. After the first week, Zak started showing up at the Sentinel's, and suddenly he had become a regular part of Kara's small gang. Sometimes he brought Grant with him. After the first day, where he and Kara got off on a rough start, he'd put all his effort into becoming one of the best pilots in the class. Unlike Zak it seemed like Grant had a talent for flying. Zak on the other hand did not show the interest in flying required for being a good pilot. Kara found herself wondering more than once, why he was even taking basic flight.
Zak was fun to be around. He was easy-going, always making her laugh at his bad jokes and they found a shared interest in Pyramid and guns. They often met up with Papercut and a few of his friends to play Pyramid in the evenings. They soon found out Zak and Kara were by far the best players, and they were therefore always divided onto different teams. Papercut was really bad, and no one wanted him on their team.
It was Thursday and they had been playing at the local stadium, which lay only a couple of yards away from the Academy. Zak had been paired with Papercut and Zoe, who wasn't a bad Pyramid player, but she and Zak combined could not make up for Papercut's utter lack of talent. Kara's team crushed them completely. But Zak took it all with good humour.
"Well played," he said to Kara who was sitting by the side of the court taking off her knee and elbow protections. The two of them were the only ones left, the others had hurried off to study for a test they had the upcoming day. "Did you ever thinking about making it a career?" Zak asked dropping down next to her, stretching out his legs in front of him.
"Yeah, actually I did," Kara answered, looking out on the triangular court with the three goal posts. "I was up for the pros. I'd been signed to one of the big teams, but then I frakked up my knee. It was bad, even after operation I could still not play on that high of a level again."
"I'm sorry about your knee," Zak said. "But I'm also glad."
Kara looked at Zak sceptically, but Zak wasn't looking at her. He was bouncing the small pyramid ball in his hands, his eyes locked at the movement of the ball.
Kara cleared her throat. "Why?"
"Because if you hadn't messed up your knee, you would have been playing with the big guys now. Been a professional. You would probably be dating Anders from C-Bucs or some other great player. You would not have been sitting here with me on a local pyramid court in Delphi. We would never have met."
Kara was silent for a while, taking in his words. She tried to image how that life would have been. She would never have starter Viper training, would never have discovered her skill for flying nor experienced the thrill of it. She would probably never have met Helo, Magen or Papercut. Would never have met the Adama brothers. Never have met Zak.
This time when she looked at Zak he was looking back at her. Now holding the ball still in his hand.
"Probably not." She said at last, holding his gaze with hers. She realised the thought of not getting to know Zak made her stomach knot painfully.
Zak reached out to take her hand, squeezing it gently. "So I'm glad you busted your knee," he said his eyes sparkling up with joy and a big goofy smile spread across his face. Kara loved that smile, and could not help smiling back. She elbowed him in the side, making him double over, and snatched the ball out from his hand. "Hey!" he shouted in protest.
"You deserved it!" Kara laughed keeping the ball just out of his reach. "I'll give it back if you are nice."
"I'm always nice," he pouted.
"Touché," Kara responded, throwing him the ball. They sat in comfortable silence for some time, neither of them in a hurry to leave. They both knew they were walking separate ways when they eventually got up to leave. Zak would be heading back to the Academy and Kara to the apartment she had rented at the east side of the city.
"Kara, will you go on a date with me?" Zak suddenly asked. Kara froze in her spot. She really did like Zak. She liked being around him. Liked how he made her laugh. Liked how he made her feel comfortable. How he allowed her to be just Kara. Few people did. Everyone had so many expectation.
But was it a good idea to date one of her students? But if she really did like Zak, should she let that get in the way of finding out if there was something more between them than just friendship?
As always, Zak did not push her. He sat still as he let her think it through on her own. At the end that was what made Kara make up her mind.
"Yes," she said slowly, peaking up at Zak. "I will go on a date with you Zak Adama."
It wasn't until she had said goodbye to Zak, with promises on a date next Saturday and a long hug, that she realised she hadn't once thought about if it was a good idea to go out with the brother of a certain Lee Adama.
Caprica: Delphi - 3 years, 8 months and 18 days Before Cylon Holocaust
Kara and Zak walked side by side through the streets of Delphi. It was dark, the streetlight barely lighting up the road ahead. But it was a Saturday night and they were not the only ones out on the street. People were out, either on the way home or to the next party, mostly in pairs or groups, but they also met people walking alone in the fresh night air. They had just passed the Delphi Museum of the Colonies, and were walking east heading for Kara's apartment. Zak had insisted on following her home, and for once she had accepted the offer instead of refusing on the basis that she was completely capable of getting home safe by herself.
Kara was laughing about a childhood story of how Zak made Lee take the blame of his misdeeds. At the beginning of their time together Kara had been uncomfortable when the topic of Lee Adama had come up. Lee was a part of Zak, he loved his brother, and talked about him often. Kara had come to understand that Zak would not have been the Zak she now knew if it had not been for his big brother. If she wanted to get to know Zak then Lee was a part of the package. It got easier after she realized this and by now she had come to enjoy the small parts of Lee she was shown through his brother. But she had not told Zak about the night she met Lee at the Sentinel's Bar, and she had no plan to do so either.
She felt a bit giddy, a feeling she was not used to. They had been to one of the fancier restaurants in Delphi, and the evening had been what she suspected a perfect date would be like, not having much to compare it with. She was not a dater.
Suddenly she felt Zak's hand brush up against her own. Her first reaction was to tear her hand away, but she willed herself to keep still and let him take her hand into his. A prickling sensation shot up through her arm, making her feel both exhilarated and terrified.
Her usual response when a situation became personally uncomfortable was fight or flight. She knew that, and this was the point Kara usually turned around and ran for her life. She was fighting back the urge to flee. It felt like something was pressing hard on her chest making it harder to breath. Maybe this was a bad idea after all? she started to panic.
Zak must have sensed her unease, because he stopped and turned towards her. Catching her eyes, not letting her look away. Kara's green scared eyes met Zak's calm light brown ones. It suddenly became a little bit easier to breathe again. Zak's steady presence grounding her. Maybe, she realized, Zak could make it possible for her to stay still for once in her life.
"Permission to speak off record, sir?" Zak asked, mimicking his word from their first ever conversation. Then one in the Tower when he told her not to give him any special treatment because of his dad.
"Permission granted," Kara answered looking up into his warm, steady eyes. Zak had moved in closer without her even noticing and they were now standing close together, their faces only inches apart.
"Kara, you are the most amazing person I've ever met." He stated and the way he said it made her believe him. He wasn't laying it on thick, or overly romantic or anything. It was just plain and simple as if it was just how the world was. "I think I'm falling in love with you."
Kara was stunned by how simple it could be said. The sound of her mother's nagging voice in the back of her head got louder, telling her she was not worthy of love, but she fought it back. She wanted so desperately to believe Zak over her mother in this. Instead of listening to the toxic voice, she tried to focus on her own feelings for the young man in front of her. Yes, she realised, she was falling for him. But she also realised she was not ready to say it back to him. At least not yet. So instead she showed him some of the many emotion raging inside her by closing the last remaining distance between them and pressing her lips to his.
His lips were warm and comforting and moulded themselves with hers. She felt her heart beating faster and a heat spread through her, filling her whole body with a compassionate warmth. As Zak embraced her in his arms and deepened the kiss, she felt utterly safe and utterly happy as if Zak had wrapped her in a protective cloak of adoration keeping the worries of the world outside at bay. So, is this how it feels to be loved?