" Cotidie damnatur qui semper timet " ( The man who is constantly in fear is every day condemned) - Syrus
"Daddy , I wanna cook too !"
Peeta smiled at Willow's reaction. His daughter was a stubborn as Katniss.
"Yeah Willow , I know. But your brother has also to try a little bit okay ?"
Willow pouted but didn't argue. Instead, she helped her little brother. While both of them were doing some cooking with their father's help , the door suddenly got opened and Haymitch arrived in the kitchen, joining the trio.
This arrival was not unnoticed by Willow , who smiled and stopped what she was doing.
"Grand Pa is here ! " exclaimed Willow with delight while running into Haymitch's arms.
"Hello you " said Haymitch while catching Willow " Besides , I'm not that old. Why don't you call me uncle instead of Grand Pa ? "
"Because you're the Daddy of mommy and daddy ! " replied the little girl.
Peeta who had his son in his arms , was amused by the situation. Willow really liked Haymitch. She often helped him with the geese because Effie was too afraid to feed them. Naturally , she spent most of her free time with Haymitch leading her to consider the former Victor as her grandfather.
"Willow , maybe you should let Haymitch breathe for a moment " told Peeta to his daughter who didn't seem to be willing to obey.
" But Daddy : Grand Pa looooovvvvveeessss me ! " said Willow ,clutching even tighter Haymitch.
"Yeah but Grand Pa would loooove breathing too sweetheart " answered Haymitch.
Willow gave in , not without sulking and let go of Haymitch. The former Victor tried to shift her attention .
" What were you doing Willow ? " asked Haymitch
The little girl's face got illuminated with a bright smile as she was happy to be the center of her grand pa's attention.
"We were making a cake for mommy " answered Willow
" And where is mommy sweetheart ? "
" Woods ! Is it right Daddy ? Mommy is in the woods !"
Haymitch understood immediately. Yesterday , the news of the ceremony must have upset the girl. She sure needed some fresh air. Haymitch made eye contact with Peeta and his doubts were confirmed as Peeta nodded before he could even ask the question. Clearing his voice , Peeta spoke to Willow.
" Would you mind going upstairs with your brother. I need to talk to Haymitch".
Willow seemed confused for a brief moment but took by the arms her little brother. She said Haymitch goodbye and scolded her father for saying " Haymitch " instead of " Grand Pa" before leaving the room. It made the two men chuckle.
Now that they were alone , Haymitch and Peeta were able to speak freely.
" She watched the news I suppose ? "
" Yeah. She got pretty affected " said Peeta ,sighing .
Because Peeta was definitely anxious for Katniss. Even tough she had shown more than once her strength , she was also vulnerable and easily sensitive. Due to the news , last night had been the proof of it : Katniss barely slept two hours and even Peeta's attempts to calm her down didn't work out.
" She is conscious she'll have to attend , isn't she ? "
" Of course she knows that Haymitch. I doubt she will though. Paylor won't force her ."
" Of course she won't but people are expecting her to be here , whether she likes it or not. She is still the Mockingjay for them" explained Haymitch.
Peeta was deeply aware about that detail . He had seen with the Victory Tour but also with the Hunger Games how people got attached to her since the moment she volunteered as a tribute. But Katniss did most of those things to survive , not to be a symbol or a hero. She was done being a national hero. She was done playing this role.
" She won't make it, Haymitch. I don't want her to experience her own nightmares. Nightmares are already rough enough like that " retorted Peeta to Haymitch.
" But you want her to go though ? "
"Yeah" admitted Peeta " It would be good for Panem of course but also for the children. To make them understand you know ? Willow knows there is something we're hiding from her. She feels it. She started to ask questions..."
Willow was , in fact , really intrigued. Seeing her mother tired , hearing her screams at night sometimes made her curiosity to get bigger and bigger. The moments of absence of his father didn't help neither.
Peeta remembered well the first time his daughter asked questions. He had felt powerless in front of his little girl. She was still innocent and he intended to stay that way.
Flashback
Peeta was solacing Katniss for ten minutes now. She was starting to breathe normally. Peeta walked out of their bedroom to bring a glass of water to his wife. When he closed the door , Willow was standing in front of him , concerned.
" What happened to mommy ? " asked shyly the little girl , tears streaming down her face.
His daughter's painful face turned upside down Peeta. He didn't expect her to be woken up by Katniss's nightmares. Secretly , he always had hoped this day will never happen.
"Mommy is okay. Don't worry Willow " said Peeta , while holding his daughter " I assure you she is okay.A bit tired but she is fine. I promise "
" Did monsters annoy her ? Because I can deal with her monsters. Monsters bother me too "
" Yeah , we could say that. Monsters bother mommy but mommy , like you , will get rid of them."
" Maybe we have the same monsters to fight. I should go and help her." suggested innocently Willow , willing to help her mother to be well.
Peeta smiled due to his daughter's innocence and tried to explain her " I don't think you have the same monsters to deal with, Willow. But here is the plan : you go back to sleep and I'll help you with your monsters and then, I will help your mother with her own .Deal ?"
" Okay daddy but don't let mommy alone with monsters. I don't want her to be hurt. " warned the little girl.
Peeta promised again leading to lower Willow's anguish. She started to doze off on her father's shoulders. Once arrived in the little girl bedroom , Peeta placed gently his daughter on her bed. He kissed her goodbye but Willow was already sleeping peacefully.
End of the flashback
Peeta's thoughts got stopped as Haymitch advised him to convince Katniss making the Baker Boy sigh.
"I'll try Haymitch. But you know how stubborn she is."
"But she is also clever. If she goes , they will let her live in peace for ten another years. Sounds a good deal to me."
"What about you ? You're going ?"asked Peeta.
"Of course I am. After all , "the man who is constantly in fear is every day condemned" like someone told me once. Wouldn't miss Capitol cakes though. And the champagne" snorted Haymitch.
Peeta knew Haymitch would have never accepted to go in the first place. He was like Katniss. Who could have convince ... The answer was clear as crystal : only his former escort could have managed this miracle. Effie had some goos effects on Haymitch.
" It's Effie , right ? " asked Peeta smiling.
" I would mind my own business if I were you " stated Haymitch , avoiding to speak about Effie. "By the way, I am perfectly able to make decisions on my own. I don't need to be babysitted...unlike your Girl on Fire "
Touché ! Peeta smiled. Haymitch was really bad at lying when Effie was at the center of the discussion. Like Katniss. Katniss who was about to give him a hard time tonight when they will discuss the ceremony.
Three hours later , Katniss came back with squirrels killed during her excursion in the woods. She seemed tired but still pretty upset by the news. When she came home , she saw the cake made by her husband and their children cheering her a little bit. She took a shower before going to the living room where her two children were playing.
"Mommy ! " exclaimed the Mellark children.
Katniss felt suddenly guilty for leaving them everytime she got an episode. To catch up with them , she took place on the sofa between the two , and braided Willow's hair while Rye was looking at them , amazed by his mother's work.
After dinner , Willow and Rye were asleep in their rooms. Peeta and Katniss were both alone. It was the time.
"Katniss ? "
"Mmmm ? " hummed Katniss whose head was lying on Peeta's shoulders.
" I think we should talk about the ceremony. "
"Are you going to convince me ? "
" Maybe. "
"You have five minutes. "
Peeta was surprised by Katniss' suggestion. Normally she never gave chances like that.
His speech lasted five minutes. Fives minutes during which he gave everything he got to persuade her. He stressed on how Katniss' actions had touched people and how important she still was for Panem.
" No Peeta " . Her answer came clear and fast. She loved Peeta and couldn't hate him for pleading his cause but she couldn't lie to him.
Afflicted, Peeta sighed and nodded. Maybe Haymitch will be a better mouthpiece after all ? He didn't give up though.
"Look at this under another angle. Do it for the children. Willow and Rye need to know."
"They re too young Peeta. I don't want them to see me as an hero while people died because of me."
" Katniss..." whispered Peeta lovingly . "Nobody died because of you. They made their choice. You gave them a chance though. A chance to stand up. To stand for what is right. We talked about that like a thousand times. I wish you would stop torturing yourself like that."
Peeta's words didn't seem to soften the woman he loves despite the years. Katniss felt in permanence guilty for what happened.
" Explain that to Finnick's son. I can't see him. He must hate him. He should hate me. " murmured Katniss , her eyes staring at the floor.
"You can't be hated. Snow tried to make me hate you but it failed. Can't you see Katniss ? People love you. I love you. The children love you. Think about it. "
Katniss was about to give in and Peeta could see it. Their children were her striking chord. Katniss was not blind : she had noticed Peeta's actions to convince her. His smile , his words were contagious. Peeta was the best mouthpiece Panem could have ever had. He always conviced his efforts he was doing made her smile.
" Happy Mellark ? "
" Don t know what you re talking about " replied Peeta whose smile was triumphant.
" You might have convinced me " told Katniss to Peeta while taking his hands
" I only "might" ? "
"Okay I give up Mellark. We will attend that stupid ceremony. But I am doing this for you and the children " stated Katniss.
Peeta chuckled. Haymitch was right : he was Katniss' voice of reason. And he was glad to be it. She had given him two amazing children despite her fears. She pushed her limits for him.
"Tell me : is Haymitch going ? "
" They all are Katniss. Former Escorts , former Victors, , Squad 451 . United to remember"
Katniss breathed heavily. She knows she was going to regret what she was about to say.
"Let's go back to Hell then. "
Hope you enjoy this chapter :) Peeta is such a good character. Always comforting Katniss no matter what. But more than his love for Katniss , Peeta is amazing : he bakes , cooks ( and as a French girl I love people who happen to bake ) and despite the all hijacking process , he is still willing to stay optimistic about the future. I wish people would see more as " the guy in love with Katniss". He is much more than that.