Chapter Three
Lilith collapsed on her bed in the room she had been given in the Public Houses. They had arrived back in the Seer's camp earlier that day, and Lilith had finally managed to escape everyone and get a few moments of peace and quiet.
She needed to come up with a plan to deal with the illithid in addition to figuring out how to deal with a thousand other things, but for the time being she wanted to rest and forget everything that lay beyond the soft, warm bed she currently lay on.
Lilith wanted to forget that people she had never heard of wanted her dead for reasons she couldn't remember, that there were people counting on her to keep them alive, and that she had basically screwed up any chance she had of Valen trusting her. She couldn't figure out how she kept getting herself into these kinds of situations. She couldn't figure out why people seemed to rely on her help so much was it was so obvious she was just making things up as she went along.
Lilith pressed her face into her pillow.
Life was too complicated some times. At least she could take solace in the fact that she had slept better the previous night than she had in a along time. Her nightmares had been getting worse lately, though she still couldn't remember anything about them after waking up. She had a feeling that if she could just remember some small fragment from the dreams, she might be able to make sense of them and make them go away.
"I hate my god damn life." Lilith muttered to herself. She buried her face deeper into the pillow, intent on shutting out the world.
The world, however, refused to be ignored.
A hesitant knocked sounded at the door.
"My lady?"
Lilith lifted her head from the pillow. The voice on the other side of the door was Valen's. His voiced sounded as hesitant as the knock had, almost cautious. Lilith wasn't sure what to make of it. The tiefling hadn't really spoken to her or looked directly at her since they left Zor'vak Mur.
Lilith sat up on the edge of her bed. "Come in, Valen." She called.
The door opened and Valen stepped into the room, staying near the door way. He looked uncomfortable, and his tail twitched nervously as he fixed his gaze somewhere on the wall to his left.
"Is something the matter, Valen?" Lilith asked, cocking her head to one side and observing him carefully. The Seer had fixed the aasimar's cheek without demanding an explanation as to what had hurt her, removing the mark entirely. However, Valen still refused to look at Lilith, as if the sight of her would remind him of what he had done.
Valen shifted, obviously searching for words that weren't coming to him easily. Lilith had figured he hated her for what she did to him. Maybe she had been wrong about that.
"My lady, I wanted to--"
"Don't." Lilith cut Valen off quickly. She could see where this was going. She shook her head, though, putting a hand up. Valen was a creature of pride, and she wouldn't have him damage his pride with an apology over something so stupid. "You had every right to hit me. I had it coming." She said, trying to use as final as tone as possible.
Valen looked right at her now. "Pardon?" He said, arching a brow at her and looking at her as if he wasn't sure she was serious.
"You were right to hit me. I shouldn't have--"
"Are you completely deranged, woman?" Valen asked with a tone of complete disbelief, a look of horror on his face. "I knew celestials weren't all there, but you're sort of pushing it."
Lilith blinked, unsure of what to say and genuinely confused.
"I... I don't think I understand, Valen." Lilith said, lowering her eyes and shaking her head. "I ignored your opinion and sedated you without your permission. I expected you to be angry. You had every right to be angry."
Valen growled, shaking his head. "By the gods, celestial, do you have any idea how incredibly frustrating you are?"
Lilith looked at him again, confusion written on her face. She was about to say again that she didn't understand, but he seemed to anticipate her words.
"I know you don't understand, that's what's frustrating!" The tiefling snapped, his tail slashing at the air as he began to pace. He seemed at a loss for words, like he was trying to think how to explain something painfully obvious that she had somehow missed. "I mean... that is... how you could possibly think I had a right to… that anyone could have a right to…" He ran a hand back through his hair and snorted, unsure on how to proceed.
Lilith opened her mouth to apologize for whatever she had done wrong, but he held up a hand in her direction and stopped her from speaking.
"Don't you dare apologize, celestial. Don't you dare." Valen shot at her, glaring at her out the corner of his eye.
Lilith shrunk back and watched the weapons-master as he paced, waiting for him to speak again.
"I had a right to be angry. I DIDN'T have a right to hit you." Valen said at last, standing still now and looking at her. "I lost control. I shouldn't have. The fact that you think I was right to hit you is... is..." Valen made a frustrated sound, once again at a loss for words. "It's mind boggling. This entire situation is mind boggling!" He half shouted.
Lilith stared at Valen as if his hair had suddenly turned purple. "What do you mean, Valen? Did I do something to upset you?" She asked. The man was crazy. That was the only explanation for what he was saying.
Valen made an exasperated sound. "You didn't do anything wrong. It's just you in general!" Valen said. Once again, Lilith was confused. She wouldn't have to wait long for an explanation; however, as Valen had started pacing again as he tried to figure out how to continue. "I can handle launching into battle against overwhelming odds. I can handle large and small scale battle tactics when there is almost no hope of survival. I can handle every gods damned danger that the Abyss and the Underdark has thrown at me. What I can't seem to handle, though, is you! Do you have any idea how INCREDIBLY frustrating you are?"
Lilith stared at Valen for a long moment, eyes wide. Then she started laughing, doubling over and clutching her sides.
"Will you stop laughing?" Valen spat. "I'm serious! No matter how hard I try, I can't figure you out."
"Well I could have told you I was fucking weird!" Lilith laughed. Apparently her use of a swear word had surprised Valen, for he had stopped pacing and stared at her in shock. Lilith just grinned and shook her head. "Sweet Lady singing in the moonlight! Don't bother trying to figure me out, Valen. You'll just drive yourself mad. I don't even understand myself most of the time."
Valen sighed and shook his head. "Can you at least tell me why you weren't mad when I hit you?" Valen asked. He shifted uncomfortably now, looking away from her. "Why did you... I mean..."
"Why did I forgive you so quickly?" Lilith finished for him, arching a brow in his direction. Lilith stood up, shaking her head. It was her turn to state the obvious. "I thought we'd been over this, Valen." Lilith said as she went over to him. Much to his apparent surprise, Lilith turned his head so he was looking at her, and started to straighten his hair and brush specks of dust off his armor. Valen fidgeted, but didn't protest. "You lost control. What hit me wasn't you. Besides, it's not like you felt good about hitting me."
Valen growled in frustration, taking hold of her hands. "It WAS me who hit you, though." He said, letting her hands go now. "And I hit you because I lost control of my demonic side, because I lost my temper. I should have been more careful, more collected."
Lilith rolled her eyes. "You're being unreasonable again." She muttered, turning away from him and walking back over to the bed as she ran a hand back through her hair. The aasimar turned back to the tiefling now. She didn't see why he wasn't getting this on his own. It was all perfectly obvious to her. "It was the demonic part of you that hit me. Oh, the demonic part of you IS a part of you, but at the same time, it ISN'T you." Lilith said simply, sitting on the edge of the bed again. "The you that hit me was different from the you that lit the campfire for me because you saw that I was scared."
Valen was silent for a long moment, then sighed and shook his head. "You... complicate things, my lady." He said in a tired tone. The tiefling was smiling a little though, and Lilith took that as a good sign.
"I freely admit that I think too much." Lilith said with a pleasant smile, leaning back a little and shrugging.
"I truly don't understand you, my lady." Valen said. "Almost every hour on the hour I remind you I don't trust you, and that you're going to get us killed. I have gone out of my way to alienate you and make you feel unwelcome. However, you seem intent on thinking the best of me."
"And you want to know why that is?" Lilith asked, truly amused at this point.
Valen flicked his tail uncomfortably again. "Yes."
"Your scars," Lilith said and pointed to him. "The way you carry yourself, the way you speak, the way you seem so intent on protecting those around you all indicate your life hasn't been an easy one." She said quietly, suddenly very serious and almost feeling a little sad. "And I have to wonder what life has done to make you so jaded... Do you really need one more person torturing you?" Lilith shook her head, straightening up now. "No... I'm not going to condemn you for trying to do what you think is right. How am I supposed to be upset because you care about these people and want to protect them?"
Valen watched Lilith for a long moment as he considered her carefully. "You are truly unique, my lady." He said. "But I still don't trust you." He added almost jokingly with a smirk.
Lilith grinned. "I wouldn't have it any other way."
´
Lilith was vaguely aware of Valen and Illa arguing somewhere behind her. Since they had all gotten on Cavallas' boat and set course for the Isle of the Maker, Illa had been chasing Valen's tail and trying to snap at it.
Illa had just made the point that if Valen didn't want him chasing his tail, he shouldn't move it like a small wounded animal. Valen retorted by saying that if Illa didn't want him to rip his wings from his back, he would leave his tail alone.
Lilith had to admit, they both made very convincing points.
The aasimar wasn't really paying attention to her companions, though. She was leaning on the rail of the boat, gazing into the depths of the Dark River. The murky waters seemed to captivate Lilith, and she found herself leaning forward a little to get a better look at the rush and current of the river around the boat.
The sorcerer leaned further over the edge. The water seemed to call to her silently, threatening to reach up for her and pull her down into the cold liquid below. It was like the river itself was a living entity that begged for her to surrender to it, to let herself drop into the waters below and let it over take her completely.
The thought made Lilith smile a little.
"Drowning would be the best way to die, I think." Lilith whispered breathlessly, her eye's still fixed intently on the river below.
"Be that as it may, my lady," Valen's hands locked around the sorcerer's waist, lifting her effortlessly and moving her away from the rail. "It may be best not to risk falling into the river." He said as he let her go.
Lilith blinked up at Valen. He'd startled her, and she couldn't help but have noticed that his hands went almost all the way around her waist when he'd lifted her. She couldn't help but think that it was odd that she'd never noticed the size of his hands before. She also had to wonder just how strong Valen was that he could lift her so easily. Or had she just been eating badly and lost weight again?
A rumbling sound shook the aasimar from her thoughts, and she looked to her right to see a barrel trembling around on the deck.
Lilith arched a brow at Valen.
"Stuffed Illa in a barrel?"
Valen smirked down at her.
"And tied him up."
"Nice touch." Lilith laughed, shaking her head.
"I told him to leave my tail alone." Valen said with a shrug. "I don't like repeating myself. So when he ignored my warning, I decided to make the problem go away." He grinned, gesturing to the barrel.
"He was only bugging you because he finds your tail fascinating." Lilith said, rolling her eyes and pretending to be annoyed. The aasimar was rather enjoying this game, whatever it was, that they all seemed to be playing. Since Valen had come to talk to Lilith in her room, whatever tension there had been between them had lessened considerably. The aasimar had been immensely relieved when she noticed the change, to say the least. "To be fair, though, I sort of understand Illa's perspective."
Valen just cocked his head and offered Lilith a curious expression.
"Your tail." Lilith said and indicated the tiefling's tail. "It's sort of... hypnotic, I suppose. Always moving and the like, and it seems to communicate your mood." The aasimar paused momentarily, considering Valen carefully before offering him a smile. "I like it."
"Uh... thank you, my lady." Valen said, turning bright red and looking away from the aasimar as he tucked his tail close to one of his legs.
Lilith's smile turned into a full blown grin.
"Are you blushing?" She asked, leaning up on her tip toes to get a better look at him.
Valen backed away quickly, startled and embarrassed. "No."
"You are blushing!" Lilith giggled, moving forward when he moved back. "Sweet goddess! That's absolutely adorable."
Valen twitched in annoyance, trying to back away again, but to no avail. "I am not blushing, and I am NOT adorable." He protested.
"Defend your honor, Betty!" Illa's muffled voice called through the barrel. "The woman weighs a hundred and five pounds, you can take her!"
"Are you not used to compliments?" Lilith asked Valen, giving Illa's barrel a swift kick in retaliation.
While Illa let out a series of drow swears that he had learned from Nathyrra, Valen shifted and cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable with the subject.
"I'm a warrior, my lady. Most of the compliments I receive are 'good job not dying', and 'your weapon is looking nice and sharp'." Valen explained.
"I see." Lilith said with a nod.
It was then that an idea struck, probably the best idea she'd ever had.
Lilith grinned fiendishly and looked to Valen.
"Why are you looking at me that way?" Valen asked, arching a brow and taking a step away from Lilith again.
"Oh, I just figured out how to handle your little reminders." Lilith half sang.
"I thought you supported me in my endeavors with mistrust and moral destruction." Valen retorted.
"Oh, I do." Lilith said pleasantly. "But that doesn't mean I'm not going to retaliate. You see, every time you tell me you don't trust me, I'm going to compliment you. More than that, every time you say I'm going to get us all killed, I will compliment you AND hug you."
Valen paled. "You wouldn't dare."
Lilith smirked for perhaps the first time ever. "Oh, I would, because I'm a touchy feely fluff ball. That, and what are you going to do to stop me?" She asked, raising a brow. "You have to drop you guard some time, Valen, and THAT'S when I'll hug you."
Valen held up his hands warningly. "Do NOT hug me, celestial. I mean it. You may be a fluff ball, but I'm--"
"--obviously starved for attention." Lilith chirped.
Valen gave an aggravated sigh. "I'm serious, my lady."
"So am I." Lilith said, then swept in quickly and hugged Valen tightly.
The tiefling tried to protest, blushing fiercely and keeping very still between fidgets, half muttering uncomfortably, half afraid to move for fear of touching her more than he already was.
Lilith let Valen go, extremely pleased with herself. "Let that be a warning." She said pointedly.
"Dear sweet gods." Illa muttered as he finally toppled out of the barrel, having chewed through the ropes. "You're like children!"
Lilith raised a brow and looked to Valen to see if he understood, but the tiefling just shrugged.
Illa shook his head, turning away from them and started to walk away. As her familiar left, Lilith could have sworn she heard him mumbling to himself.
"If they were eight years old he'd be pushing her in the mud, and she'd be pulling his tail..."
´
Every part of Lilith's body ached, and she gave a deep moan of pain as she pushed herself up off the stone floor. Dust filled her lungs as she breathed deeply, and she coughed violently because of it. Her head felt like it was going to split down the middle, and getting into a sitting position was difficult.
"Beautiful." Lilith muttered, looking up at the hole in the ceiling far above her. The floor had caved in, and it took Lilith a moment to remember why.
She'd had a bad feeling about The Maker's laboratory from the moment they stepped into it. Golems were near impervious to magic. She was basically going to be useless in battle except for supporting the others. Lilith knew Valen was strong, but she wasn't sure how long that would last them in a dungeon full of constructs.
Naturally something had gone wrong.
They'd eventually come to a hallway with stairs that appeared to lead down. Blocking the stairs, however, was a large construct. Lilith vividly remembered the screech of metal on metal and the hiss of steam, the stench of oil making her gag as the steel minotaur raised it's axe and charged at them.
The battle was mainly a blur, as most battles were to Lilith. She did all she could to keep back and out of the way while still protecting her companions. Unfortunately, though, Lilith's repertoire of defensive spells was not as large as her store of offensive spells.
The part of the fight that stuck frozen in her mind was the end of it. Valen had been occupying the Minogon's attention rather effectively while Deekin took what shots he could with his cross bow, and Lilith used what protection spells she had. She hadn't been too worried, in fact, it looked like they were going to win the fight.
Then came the sickening scream of metal being torn, and a cry of pain coming from Valen's direction, not far from her.
Lilith hadn't seen what happened, she'd been busy with a spell for Deekin. The aasimar's stomach churned, however, and her blood went cold with panic when she saw Valen's motionless form on the ground.
Lilith vaguely remembered screaming as she ran to Valen's side to try and deter the charging construct so that it wouldn't kill him.
She'd cast a spell, though she wasn't sure which. The sorcerer had been reacting on instinct. Unfortunately, the spell she used was too powerful and seemed to explode on her, tossing her to the ground as well as everyone left standing.
Then the walls had come down, as well as the floor.
Lilith struggled to her feet now, trying to get a grip on her surroundings.
The still body of the Minogon lay buried in rubble not far from her, but Illa and Deekin were nowhere to be seen. Valen, however, lay very still nearby.
"Valen!" Lilith half tripped over her feet as she rushed over to Valen, kneeling near him and looking him over.
The Minogon must have hit him fairly hard, for the tiefling's breastplate had been rend in two, a large, deep wound running along the length of his chest and bleeding thickly.
Valen was alive, though. He gave a pained sound as he shifted a little, his eye's barely open.
Tears began running down Lilith's cheeks. "You stupid man. I thought demons were supposed to be invincible."
"I'll be fine." Valen managed after a moment, though his voice was weak and wet with blood.
Shaking hands moved as delicately as they could to move the split pieces of breastplate aside, then spread the remains of Valen's tunic apart. Lilith knew she had to get a look at the tiefling's wound and do what she could for him as quickly as possible or he would die. Lilith's insides were clenching, though, and her heart half refused to beat as an unbearable fear pressed down on her.
She didn't want Valen to die. The thought of him dying made her feel physically ill. His wound was terrible, though, and Lilith wasn't sure how much she could do for him. Valen's pack had been smashed, and Deekin had the rest of the healing supplies.
Valen struggled to lift a hand and rested it on one of hers. Despite herself, Lilith's heartbeat slowly returned to normal and her hands stopped shaking.
"The others?" Valen asked, taking a shallow and shuddering breath.
Lilith closed her eyes and concentrated. "Illa is alive, I can feel him. That means Deekin is most likely alive too."
"Well, better luck next time." The tiefling tried to laugh, tried to lift her spirits a little, but it turn into a hacking cough that brought crimson fluid up to his pale lips.
Lilith wanted to break down crying more than anything in the world, but knew that she couldn't allow herself such a childish action.
"I don't have any healing items, Valen." Lilith whimpered. "And I don't know how much longer it will be until the other's find us... I... I think..." She stammered and took a deep breath. "I think we have to burn the wound closed. We need to close the wound, quickly, so you don't lose any more blood, and to make sure the wound doesn't infect."
"Wouldn't be the first time I've had to do that." Valen breathed. "How are we going to do it, though?"
Lilith shuddered. "I... there's only one fire spell I can use, a low level spell called 'burning hands'." She said. Fire terrified Lilith more than anything. The thought of using the spell, of actually touching fire and having it on her hands made the aasimar want to claw at the skin on her hands and hide.
Lilith wanted Valen to live more than she wanted to hide, though. She'd have done anything she could to keep Valen from dying.
"Are you sure? I seem to remember you not liking fire." Valen's eyes met Lilith's for a moment, their usual intensity dimmed slightly.
Lilith didn't break his gaze. She was finding less and less that those eyes scared her. "Positive." The aasimar breathed. "Just... it's going to hurt."
"Better than dying." He said, smiling just a little.
"I'm going to yell at you later." Lilith said, trying to smile a little herself.
Then the sorcerer closed her eye's, holding her hands in front of her. Burning Hands was the only fire spell Lilith could make work, and even though it was a low level spell it took every ounce of her concentration to make the flames manifest and coat her hands.
Lilith could feel the fire licking at her hands, and it took every bit of her willpower not to panic and fail the spell. Valen needed her to close the wound. He needed her to keep him alive.
She wanted so badly for him to live.
Lilith opened her eyes, refusing to look at her now flaming hands. "Ready?"
"Just do it quickly." Valen said with a nod, closing his eyes and bracing himself.
The aasimar took a deep breath and lowered her hands to Valen's flesh. The tiefling's body tensed and his back arched as he ground his teeth and tried to keep from crying out in pain. Lilith cringed, tears rolling down her cheeks, but she didn't remove her hands. Rather, the sorcerer moved her hands over Valen's wound. She knew if she paused for even a moment, she would lose her nerve and the spell would dissolve.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Lilith finished sealing the wound. She had left an unsightly, puckered scar across his chest. The skin was screaming red and looked very painful, but at least he wouldn't lose any more blood.
Lilith frantically shook the flames from her hands, doubling over and shaking violently. Though the fire was gone, she could still feel the flames on her hands.
"Deep breaths, my lady." Valen wheezed. "You did well."
Lilith whimpered, but managed a nod and did her best to straighten up. She couldn't let herself go to pieces.
"Just don't fall asleep or anything, okay?" Lilith said as she brushed the tears from her eyes. "I don't want you dying or anything."
Valen managed a weak smile. "I'll be okay. Demons heal quickly. I promise I'll be up and questioning your loyalties soon."
"I know, but... but..." Lilith tried to hold back the tears, but it was no use any more. She was sobbing, clutching herself and trembling. Valen had almost died. He still might die. He was lying on the floor before her, surrounded by his own blood and more than a little pale. Of course, Valen was always pale, but it was more than clear how much blood he had lost.
"Please, my lady, don't cry." Valen said quietly. "Taunting you isn't any fun if you just cry."
Lilith found herself laughing a little, though she hadn't wanted to. "Damn you, you wretched man." She said as she shook her head, pushing the tears back and smiling faintly. "Rest, okay? I'm going to try contacting Illa. Hopefully they'll find us soon and we can fix you up properly."
Valen said nothing more, but he nodded and closed his eyes. It wasn't long before the tiefling's ragged breathing took on an even rhythm, letting Lilith know he was asleep.
She had been terrified that he would die. She had been more terrified than she could put into words. It was a fear that still ate at her now, gripping at her heart and making her blood refuse to flow in her veins.
Lilith would have done anything to keep the man before her alive. Why that was, she wasn't exactly sure. Then again, she hadn't been lying when she said she didn't understand herself most of the time, didn't understand the feelings that were stirring in her breast.
"Please..." Lilith whispered to whatever gods or spirits may have been listening or to no one at all. "Please, don't let him die. Don't take him from me too..."
Tears coursed down her cheeks once more, racking her body and blurring her vision.
"Don't die, Valen... please don't die." The aasimar begged Valen's silent, sleeping form.
Lilith tucked her hair back, then slowly brought her hand down and delicately traced the outline of the tiefling's face. Her heart had started beating again. More than that, her heart was pounding in her chest.
"Please, don't die." The words were whispered, and Lilith closed her eyes.
Slowly, carefully, Lilith leaned down over Valen and paused when they where barely a breath apart.
"Don't die."
Lilith then closed what little distance there was between them, setting her lips gently against his.