After my oh-so-manly fleeing from the flat, I set out in a random direction. I had a few hours until sunrise. I needed violence. A good spot of pounding on someone always cleared my head. I was searching for some demons to kill, some vamps to dust, or even a good old-fashioned bar brawl to get the blood pumping. Er, figuratively.

I lost myself in a tangle of cramped, dark alleyways, hoping for a fight. I went up one and down another until it could safely be said I was in the bowels of the city, and the most likely place for a demon to be lurking. It rather perfectly started to rain, which I manfully ignored. It wasn't like I could get sick anyway.

I decided to head more uptown, and made the appropriate turn when tiny Alice appeared in front of me like she'd gone to Hogwarts and learned to apparate. She looked so out of place in the dark and dirty alleyway – small and helpless. She smelled like danger, but I couldn't find it in myself to get worked up over someone who was about five feet tall. I'm tough, I could take her if it came to it.

I decided to ignore her. Whatever she had to say, I wasn't interested in. I didn't even particularly care which side she was on in this little battle, if there were sides at all and it wasn't just in my head. If she was here to threaten me away from her little human friend, she could piss straight off. I'd done more than enough on my own to make sure that wasn't an issue. I wouldn't be able to take any threats from the tiny bird seriously anyway.

If she was angling for Bella and I to get together, she was likely insane, and it was too damn bad. I wasn't ready to get involved yet again with someone for whom I was the second choice. At least this time I wasn't losing out to the poof. I don't think my ego could take that again.

I turned around to head in the other direction, and the damn girl was in front of me again. I threw a quick glance over my shoulder to make sure there weren't two of her. The alleyway was empty that direction, so I spun and took two steps forward, head down.

I crashed straight into her. I took the same two steps backward and just stared at her.

"Are you done yet? I could do this all night." She sounded bored.

"How are you doing that?"

"My breed is fast. Oh, and I can see the future." She said it like I would say I liked a good fight. Like it was entirely normal. For all I knew, it was.

"Er, do all of you do that?" I couldn't bring myself to use the words. It reminded me too much of Dru and that was a big, steaming crate of pain I wasn't willing to open up right now. Not that Dru affected me. No, I was a stone.

"No, just me. Some of the others have other gifts, though." She paused for a long minute. I turned to go again, and for once she wasn't blocking my way. "Don't go, Spike."

I stopped. "Did Bella tell you my name?"

"Yes." She had more to say, and I knew it, so I just waited, my back to her. "I know who you are." She finally added. When I didn't respond, she carried on. "William the Bloody. Order of Aurelius." I slowly turned to face her. Was it this tiny girl I'd have to fight tonight? It hardly seemed fair. I wanted a good brawl, not an easy stomping.

When she had my attention she kept talking. "Railroad spikes. Angelus, Dru, Darla – the Scourge of Europe." She took a step toward me and her voice grew softer. "Sunnydale. The slayer. A Champion." I felt each word like a punch in the gut. "LA. Apocalpse."

I didn't have any words. How did she know so much about me? She must have read the question in my face. "You're a little famous, and I have the internet, connections, and a lot of money. I saw you in Bella's future before you two even met and I had to know. She means a lot to me, you know."

The rain had picked up and it drenched me and dripped off my hair, my nose, and my fingers. I was soaked everywhere permeable. Alice looked absolutely perfect. I was not amused.

"Does this mean I have your seal of approval?" The question came out sarcastic and a little broken. I was happy with the sarcastic bit. Need to work on the rest.

"She'll be good for you… and you'll be good for her. If you can both stop dancing around this thing between you and open up. Tell her the truth. The whole truth."

The girl just kept staring at me and I couldn't help but to crack a joke. "And nothing but the truth?" It came out weak and half-arsed. Damn.

Alice sighed and rolled her eyes at me. "Yes, Spike," she said in exasperation. Then her manner softened and she gave me words of hope. "She won't be afraid of you. She'll love you for opening up to her. She wants more than love, she wants an equal partnership. If you can be the man to give that to her, she'll be yours." She spoke with the voice of prophecy, the voice of a seer. She was too sure of herself. The entire thing was pissing me off. I'd had enough of the future-seeing bullshit with Dru.

"I'm not a man, love," I said, the words distasteful in my mouth. I might not be a man, but I wanted to be more than a monster, and maybe I could admit that I wanted it for this silly human girl that I had just met. No, I couldn't admit it. It had nothing to do with Bella at all. Right.

"But you're more than a monster," said Alice, very seriously. I nearly fell over when she seemed to hear the words that were in my head. I shot her a questioning look, but she ignored me. "You're wavering now," she added, "I can see it. Everything hangs on your choice. Please make the right one. Don't let pride and machismo get in the way of this."

"What about your brother, ducks?" I said. "Shouldn't you be on his side in this?"

She snorted. The petite, put-together girl in front of my actually snorted. I think I could grow to like her. "Edward… has done a lot of stupid things. Things that have made no one happy. He's my brother, but Bella is my best friend. She deserves to be happy, and I want that for her."

"And you think that I am the key to this happiness? Love, I'm evil, only slightly reformed. I'm as likely to kill her as I am to save her." That might not be strictly true, but who was counting?

Alice just stared at me like she knew I was completely full of it. How she managed to fill a stare with such derision and boredom I'll never know. The minutes seemed to drag on for hours while I waited for her to say or do something. It didn't even occur to me to do something about it, I was too caught up in trying to work through her words.

When she finally spoke, her eyes were slightly unfocussed and her voice took on that special timbre that true seers had. "The choice is yours. Your path can lead straight to her, or right back to where you have always been. Choose wisely." Alice was there, then gone. She was so damn fast.

I felt her more than anything just a second before I heard her voice in my ear. "She could be everything you want." And then she was gone, and I was alone with too many thoughts.

Luckily, I knew what the cure for too many thoughts was: stop having them. This left me with few options, but I was a master at them. My options were the bloodshed I'd set out for, or to get well and truly blindingly drunk.

As a fight didn't appear to be forthcoming, I set out for a bar to drink myself into oblivion. I found a shady looking establishment, hoping that both my patented thought-removal processes would come true in one tidy package.

I plonked myself at the bar and ordered a double of vodka straight up. I threw it back and demanded another before the barkeep even had time to turn away. It is not easy for a vampire to get blindingly drunk. It took money and a steady dedication to inebriation. I was just the vamp for the job.

I could only pray to whatever hell gods out there that looked after wayward vampires that I wouldn't start spilling my problems to the bloke behind the bar. Sitting in some dingy bar, getting pissed by myself, and spilling my guts to the barkeep over a girl were not high on my list of things I'd like to do. Nor were they very evil. Not at all in keeping with my image.

I was halfway through my third drink when my mobile phone beeped in my pocket. I nearly jumped out of my skin. I was halfway to drunk, and I hardly ever had anyone contact me on it. I wasn't used to the noise and vibration.

I flipped the cover open to see a text message from a number I didn't recognize. I opened the message, and if my heart usually beat, it would have stopped. It was from Bella.

S – R U OK? Sorry if

Alice shocked you.

She's stealthy.

- B

Short, simple, to the point. Careful avoidance of the word "scared". I was beginning to think this girl knew me better than she should. I started to get suspicious. Bella didn't act like she knew much of anything about me, but her best friend was entirely too well informed. Was there cheating going on in this game of ours?

Something about that idea didn't seem right, but I couldn't quite put my finger on what. I quickly sent a message of my own back to her.

B –

I'm good. Nothing

to apologise for.

Sorry for leaving so

suddenly.

- S

If I breathed, I'd have held my breath waiting for a response. I didn't know what she thought or if I'd ruined any chance I might have once had tonight. I also wasn't even really sure I wanted the chance even if I had it. All this plus the alcohol was making my brain a not very nice place to be. She thankfully didn't make me wait very long.

S –

Care to make it

up to me? Lunch

tomorrow?

- B

I was guessing that she didn't quite have a grasp on some of the finer points of my nature. Lunch was definitely out.

B –

Lunch no good for

my condition. Dinner?

- S

I hoped she'd get a kick out of me calling it a 'condition'. Even if this wasn't going to be a thing, I didn't want the girl upset with me. And there I went again. Just call me Spike the eunuch.

S –

My place. Dinner. Same

time, same place. Do

try to make it all the

way through this time.

- B

I hoped I was reading that right and she was trying to tease me. If that was the case, then she didn't sound irrevocably angry with me. That relieved me more than it should. Suddenly the prospect of oblivion followed by a hangover didn't sound as appealing.

I left the bar and set out in the direction of my own flat. The sun was rising, and I needed to hide from it. I had a lot of thoughts to sift through. Oh, and some sleep probably wouldn't go amiss either. I needed all of my faculties to make it through whatever tomorrow would bring with Bella.

---
A/N - this chapter is slow but oh-so-necessary. Spike needed a kick in the butt thanks to his mini-meltdown, and Alice was just the one to deliver it. I love Alice. Now I'm in a good place to get back to the Spike-and-Bella goodness, I promise! The path to true love never does run smooth!