Dear Kagamine Len, my sweet fiance whom I miss dearly at the moment,
How are you doing? Yikes, I guess that's a strange question to ask, isn't it? Since I already texted you a million times that yes, I'm alright, calm down already, geeze, and I returned that question a million times over to ask if you're okay as well.
But I'm not as good as you when it comes to writing letters, you know? Since you're the cheesestick of our relationship. Smirk.
Rin and I are in the hotel room right now. She's complaining about the massive piles of documents we have to bring to the conference and trying to dig it all out of our suitcases. I wanted to help, but she said that she didn't want anyone getting in the way of her 'hidden treasures', so here I am, writing this letter to you.
Oh, Rin looked over at what I was writing. She said hi, and she laughed at us because this letter thing, according to her, is the dorkiest thing she'd ever seen done by two real-life humans.
But we don't have to care about that, do we? Also, the reason why Rin said it was dorky is all your fault. :)
Right, so, make sure you eat well and drink plenty of fluids when I'm not around, okay, Len? I'll be back on Thursday. Make sure you don't binge on pizza and ice cream while sobbing for the three days I'll be gone.
There's not much for me to talk about, but I know you asked for a good story… Oooh, how about what happened on the plane? Just now, there was a guy and this little girl seated next to me and Rin. This was exactly the conversation that followed between them.
Guy: Hello, little girl. Would you like to talk to me? Flights go by a lot faster if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.
I don't know what that girl was thinking when she closed her book and then replied to the man, but hell, Len, she was smart. Just wait until you find out what she said!
Girl: Alright. What would you like to talk about?
Guy: Oh, I don't know. How about why there is no tooth fairy that leaves money underneath your pillow when you lose a baby tooth, no Santa Claus who leaves presents underneath the Christmas tree and why crossing your fingers never gives you any more good luck than you already have?
Girl: Alright, but let me ask you a question first. A cow, deer and horse all eat the same stuff- grass. But yet, a cow turns out a flat patty, a deer excretes lumps and a horse produces clumps. Why is that?
Guy: …
Girl: Do you really feel qualified to discuss all of those things when you don't know shit?
Len, you should've seen the look on the guy's face! He was like a fish, he kept opening and closing his mouth!
Alright, I guess that's all I have for now. I'm getting pretty tired, and Rin's currently snoring beside me. I hope you'll sleep well tonight, Len.
Goodnight, I love you.
Miku.
-0-
Dear Hatsune Miku, my beautiful bride with gems for eyes and turquoise silk for hair,
[the page is covered in Len's icky vomit]