Part Four

As the months breezed by, Astrid's belly grew and grew, as did her confidence and excitement. After the first three miserable months of nausea and a ridiculously heightened sensitivity to the smells of specific kinds of fish, Astrid welcomed the next stage with open arms. Snotlout had taken charge of the trainees, nobody would allow her to do much flying, if at all, and it was getting harder to sleep at nights, but oddly enough, she wasn't too bothered. In fact, she seemed to be enjoying the increasing attention and her developing bump…unless anyone but Hiccup tried to touch it. One day, on a dare from her brother, Ruffnut had been cavalier enough to come running and squealing in Astrid's direction with her hands outstretched. Unfortunately, she never quite made it owing to the fact that Astrid's fist made a sudden appearance…in her face. No one on Berk ever attempted such a foolish act again.

Hiccup's sanity, on the other hand, seemed to be sliding in the opposite direction. The constant pressure of tribal matters, the worry about his wife and first child and mounting weeks of sleeplessness were taking their toll. More often than not, he found himself falling asleep on his feet and once even tipped over sideways in the middle of an important village council meeting. Luckily, Fishlegs happened to be next to him and broke the fall simply by standing there.

Most of the time, Hiccup willingly gave half of his meals to the increasingly ravenous Astrid or ventured out to retrieve that one specific food item she happened to be craving that day. He held her close while she sobbed uncontrollably for no reason whatsoever, then smiled confusedly as she laughed and talked happily within the next minute. He always attempted to help whenever she went on one of her ferocious cleaning or organizing sprees. And every time she refused it, he made sure to get well out of the way and not touch anything for at least a day afterward.

He let Astrid take over the bed and started sleeping downstairs on the floor next to Toothless every night. It was cold, hard and uncomfortable, but it was slightly easier to sleep without her constantly groaning and changing positions, rolling over and smacking him right in the face, shoving him clean off the bed or mumbling nonsensically to whoever was in her strange pregnant-minded dreams. As far as he was concerned, two and a half hours of sleep instead of one and a well-rested wife were worth the discomfort. Astrid was completely unaware of her nighttime exploits, of course, and Hiccup decided it would probably be best not to worry her. So he worried for her instead.

By the time the last few weeks rolled around, Hiccup was so tired, his nerves so frayed that any mention of Astrid's name made him jump and then bolt for home. Someone (usually Gobber) was dispatched to catch him and carry him back to whatever important task he had been attending to. Then it would take a good ten to fifteen minutes to talk him down and convince him that the baby wasn't coming quite yet.

It didn't help that visitors from around the village had begun dropping by the Haddock home in droves, wishing them luck from the gods, delivering baskets of food and gifts and then sticking around to chat. While the gifts were greatly appreciated, the unwanted advice that came along with them was not. Hiccup had to grit his teeth every time someone knocked on the door, biting back the urge to tell them that he really didn't want to hear it for the tenth time that day and to please come back later, or possibly never, depending on who it was.

Every day it was the same drill. Open the door, accept the gift, get shoved aside by a large Viking woman and five of her children, plaster on a painful grin and listen as she gave Astrid the same spiel the three women before her had. He could almost recite every bit of it from memory:

"Oh, you think you're tired now? Just wait until the baby comes, you'll never sleep again. Make sure you eat plenty of such-and-such to start labor and not too much of this-or-that because they will delay it. It's going to hurt like Thor's thunder, but the key is to relax and breathe and call on Odin every ten minutes. It's completely normal to want to hold on to your favorite weapon rather than your husband during the worst times. Remember to name the baby something awful to ward off the trolls. Do you have enough blankets? Oh, let me give you ten more. Don't let the baby sleep too long during the day and never miss a nighttime feeding. This is by far the best cure for colic and don't let anybody tell you any different. The women in my clan have used it for centuries and it works like a charm. This is the correct swaddling method and do you know how to change a diaper? Here, let me show you for the fiftieth time…"

This was why, when the opportunity came to fly out to a neighboring island on official Berk business, Hiccup didn't give anyone else the chance to even think about volunteering. This was his moment to escape the madness for a while and to breathe, two things he hadn't had the luxury of doing for the past eight and a half months. If he didn't get out sometime within the next week, he was sure he was going to lose it and punch somebody in the face. And that would not be a very chiefly thing to do.

….

Hiccup and Toothless rose early on the morning of their departure, hoping to sneak out before Astrid woke up.

No such luck.

"Hiccup?" she called just as they were about to slip outside.

He stopped, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath before answering.

"Yeah?"

"Where are you going?"

"Uh…outside. Yeah, just outside for…stuff. Be back in a bit…yup." Hiccup caught Toothless's eye roll in his peripheral vision. "What?" he muttered through his teeth. "It's early, ok?"

"Wait…"

Hiccup heard the rustle of covers and the creak of wood as she hauled herself upright. There was a pause and he knew she was sitting on the edge of the bed catching her breath from the tremendous effort. Strong as she was, normal, everyday activities were becoming fairly difficult, even painful. The baby was sitting very low now, and walking any farther than from one end of the house to the other was altogether out of the question.

Toothless tilted his head, looking up at him expectantly, eyes full of concern. Giving him a pat, Hiccup nodded. What was he thinking? It would be incredibly idiotic to leave now that they were so close, even just for a day-long trip to another island.

"Hang on, be right there," he called back, already at the base of the stairs.

When he cleared the top landing, she was still sitting on the bed, leaning back on one arm with the other curled around her large belly. She seemed to radiate with love and motherly bliss, making Hiccup wish he could freeze this moment and keep it close to him forever.

"She's moving," she said, eyes sparkling as he sat beside her. Gently, she took his hand and placed it on the bump. Sure enough, the baby was busy performing some kind of acrobatic feat under his palm, wiggling, stretching and pushing against the walls of its temporary haven.

"How d'you know it's a girl?"

"It's strange, but…" she trailed off, gazing out into space.

"But?" Hiccup prompted.

She squeezed his hand. "I just have this feeling…"

Hiccup leaned in to kiss her forehead. "Well, I don't care what it is as long as it gets here healthy and happy."

She nodded in agreement, then something else seemed to cross her mind.

"Where are you two headed so early?"

Hiccup exchanged a slightly guilty glance with Toothless before spluttering out an answer.

"We were just…uh, that is…we have a small errand to run," he finally admitted. "I know, I know, I should have told you, but I would only have been gone a day, maybe two at most and if I don't get out of here, I'm going to start throwing things…possibly people."

Astrid considered this a moment, the complete lack of expression on her face making him squirm inwardly a little. Would she be angry? Would she let it slide? Would she ask for another whole smoked salmon for breakfast?

"Ok, I'm coming with you."

Hiccup ground a fist into his forehead. "Aagh, I knew you'd be disappointed at me for this and I'm so sorry that I—wait, what?"

"I said I'm coming with you."

Hiccup jumped off the bed like he'd been royally shocked in the behind by a Skrill, landing in front of her with his arms up as if trying to stop an oncoming stampede.

"Wha—no! Nonono, absolutely not. You are not coming with me."

"Um, actually I am. Now help me up."

"Astrid, you're pregnant!" he blurted, flapping his hands at her belly. "Really, really pregnant. Y-you could have this baby any day now and you should definitely not go flying. Not even with me on Toothless. I won't let you. Toothless won't let you! I won't let Toothless let you!"

Seeing that her request for help was a no-go, she began to heave herself slowly to her feet. Taking the hint, Hiccup stepped in to hoist her up the rest of the way while Toothless supported from behind.

"We'll take a boat, then."

Hiccup groaned. "Ok, do you even know what you're saying right now?"

"Of course I do. I'm saying I'm bored out of my Odin-living skull and sick of barely being able to walk and being stuck in the house and listening to all that stupid so-called 'advice'. I want out of here just as much as you do…I want some time with you, Hiccup. Alone. In a boat on the sea where no one can reach us and shove another basket or colic remedy in our faces. Time with you before everything changes."

Not knowing how to counter this argument, Hiccup opened and closed his mouth like a beached fish a few times, ending the show with his jaw hanging wide open. Placing a couple fingers under his chin, Astrid snapped it shut as she waddled by and picked up her axe, swinging it across her back. He couldn't think of a single reason why she would possibly need to bring it along, but apparently she meant business. There was nothing more he could say or do to stop her.

"B-but…what if you go into… Aaagh, this is a really bad idea, Astrid. I'm worried about you and I'm worried about us being 'alone in a boat on the sea where nobody can reach us'. I mean, I can't come up with a scenario that screams 'disaster' louder than this one."

She laid a hand firmly on his shoulders, grinning impishly at the prospect of an unplanned excursion, a day away from the sitting and the waiting that had become the norm.

"Then don't come up with one and stop worrying. I'll be fine, I promise."

Hiccup sighed heavily and ran a hand back and forth through his hair, thinking long and hard about his answer.

"Ok, ok…but we're bringing Toothless just in case."

"Perfect. Let's go." She made for the stairs but stopped, one foot hovering in the air. "Ooh, I almost forgot. Where did the rest of that seriously amazing cheese you brought me yesterday end up? We should take it along." She set the foot down on the step. "And maybe some apples…and salmon and yak milk and a couple loaves of bread and some butter." Another two steps. "Oh, and—"

"Yeah, I'll just go pack up the entire kitchen," Hiccup snorted.