When Ella saw Neal from a safe distance he didn't look anything like the brother she knew. She couldn't remember ever seeing him in a crumpled shirt before, now she had seen that twice in a month. What made it worse was that this time she was the reason for it. He had been outside the library, probably all night, just waiting for her.

Looking at him like that, she almost felt sorry. Sorry for him, and sorry for running and hiding. But only almost… because looking at him also made all the memories come back. Memories of the first couple of nights she had spent out on the street, with no money and no place to go. The things she had to do to survive until Mozzie had finally found her… just because that man sitting right in front of her had given everything up, everything including himself, for a girl.

"You don't get to be here!"

Neal was sitting at a table and looked as if he would fall asleep any moment. He was a mess, but his face lightened up when he saw Ella. She still kept a save distance from him.

"I…" He got up immediately and tried to take her hand, he might have even tried to hug her, but Ella backed away.

"No. You don't get to talk to me, and you shouldn't even be here. I'm guessing that you forced it out of Mozzie in some cruel way, and I can't blame him, it was my own fault. I shouldn't have shown up at the hospital. But you shouldn't have come here either. I had reasons to run and hide from you, Neal Caffrey, and I will do it again. Please, just leave, or I will call security."

Neal had rarely ever been speechless, but all the hate in Ella's eyes, in her words and how she backed away from him... He felt like someone had punched him right into his heart. She was not his little sister anymore, looking at her like that it felt like she was a different person all together.

He had all these words laid out for her, pacing up and down in front of the library had given him some time to do that. The fear of Peter showing up before he could talk to Ella was sitting on his shoulders, but Neal just had to get out of the house after Mozzie had finally spilled that Ella was living right here in New York.

He had felt relieved and angry at the same time. Angry at her for hiding from him, angry at his best friend for keeping this from him, and most of all, angry at himself for driving away the only family he had left. So far away, that she got herself a new identity just so he wouldn't find her.

All this time, when he was thinking that she was hiding from the police, that she might still be afraid that Peter would take her in if she had approached Neal, she was only hiding from him.

He would have to explain everything to Peter when he showed up. If the anklet, for whatever reason, hadn't triggered the alarm yet, Neal was sure Peter would come and find him when he won't show up for work.

Neal wanted to say something to Ella, but he couldn't. He could hardly bare to look at her and what all the hate and pain and hiding had turned her into. He turned around and walked a few steps away, somewhat prepared to just be done with this chapter of his life. But then he stopped.

"I'm sorry." he said, not turning around to face Ella again. His voice was shaking. "I'm so very very sorry. You have the right to hate me, and to hide from me. I just… I had to make sure you were okay. I…"

"Okay?" Ella's voice almost echoed through the aisle. "Turn around and look at me, Neal."

Neal turned around and Ella was standing right in front of him. He could have touched her, hugged her, but her glare captured him.

"You didn't care about me being okay when you walked right into that trap for your girlfriend. You didn't care about me being okay when I had to use fake names, because just seeing a police car scared the crap out of me. You didn't care about me being okay when you were in prison while I was trying to stay alive on the street, doing whatever was necessary until Mozzie finally found me. You didn't care about me being okay when you escaped prison, four months before you could have been a free man, again for the same stupid girl…" Ella's voice broke and tears started running down her eyes. Neal tried to wipe them away, but she pushed away his hand. He so desperately wanted to hold her…

"You always kept running after a girl who never really loved you, sacrificing everything and everyone else along the way. You know, the brother who truly cared about me being okay disappeared the moment he had met Kate Moreau, and I don't think he will ever return from that."