"All of us have moments in our childhood where we come alive for the first time. And we go back to those moments and think, this is when I became myself."

Rita Dove

The whole team was relieved when the plane touched down in San Francisco. It had been a lot more bumpy than any of them had expected it to be when they went over the thunderstorm. Even Hotch, who was normally a collected, calm man, was clutching his arm rest with his right hand. They hadn't even talked much about the case because of the turbulence that had interrupted them. Rossi, to no one's surprise, was the first person off the plane. JJ picked up her bag and walked off with the rest of her team, getting into SUVs that were waiting for them at the private airport already. JJ rode with Hotch and Morgan while Rossi, Reid and Emily were in the car. It was a short ride to the police station, but unlike the rough plane ride, it gave JJ the time she needed to organize her thoughts. This case was going to be hard for her, even she knew that, but there was no way she was going to let it get in the way of helping these kids. She rubbed her hands together in her lap and looked up as they approached the station. It looked bigger and nicer then a lot of the stations they had been to before and there was a crowd of press swarming in front of the doors. It was like they were just waiting for her to arrive…great. As they parked, the press recognized the FBI plates on the vehicles and started swarming around them.

"Morgan, you and JJ take care of the press." Hotch ordered as he opened the door. There were people everywhere shouting questions at them from all different angles. She saw Hotch, Rossi, Reid and Emily walk into the station, leaving Morgan and JJ alone with the press. Camera flashed around them and many microphones were being pointed in their direction.

"Are you from the FBI?"

"Do you have any leads?"

"Is it true that he's only taking blonde children?"

"What happened to Homeland Security?"

"Is there another body?"

"Excuse me!" JJ yelled loudly over the voices that were frantically shouting all around her. They all quieted down for a moment, only leaving the sound of clicking cameras left. "We are from the FBI Behavioral Analysis Unit and we have been asked to come here to help the SFPD with these murders. We would appreciate if you would all save your questions until we have time to set up a press conference. Until that happens we would like to ask you to stay away from the doors of the station and don't bother us because we're trying to help these kids." She glanced over at Morgan who stood beside her, but didn't say anything he only nodded along with her words for effect. She half-expected them to all secede away from the doors to let them through, but most of them stood firmly in their positions. JJ tried not be surprised with their persistence after all she had been in their place before, when she was a field reporter.

Beside her, Morgan stepped forward into the crowd of press. "If you don't leave now we will have to call security and have you removed from the scene." He spoke firmly, but only JJ knew that he completely bluffing. Most of the press started backing away from him, obviously intimidated and retreated to their vans.

JJ gave Morgan a playful smirk, "Not bad for a rookie." She patted him on the shoulder and walked towards the front doors of the station.

Morgan jogged after her until he was walking beside her. "What do you mean, rookie?" He smiled widely with perfect white teeth. "I've been at this job a lot longer then you have, Pennsylvania." He looked her up and down from her head to her feet.

JJ rolled her eyes. "But you didn't spend half that time in front of the media." She sighed, remembering the time she'd spend only being the team's liaison.

Morgan looked like he was remembering it too, but the next thing he said caught her off guard. "You know, I really admired the way that you could do all that stuff with the media…" He paused, "And that one time you did that speech over the radio to the Prince of Darkness. It was amazing JJ and I don't think everyone gives you enough credit."

JJ gave him a modest smile, "Thanks Derek. You guys were great too."

"And now you're pretty badass if I do say so myself." Morgan chuckled and pushed the doors of the police station open. What they saw inside was complete chaos. There were officers walking swiftly in all directions, people yelling into phone lines and what JJ could only assume to be victim's parents crying while they waited to get questioned. She looked around for the rest of the team, but they were nowhere to be found.

"Ummm excuse me, who are you?" A man walked up to them and JJ was about to answer, but he didn't give her the chance. "If you're here to report a crime we're directing minor crimes to the Brisbane Police Department." He gave them a curt nod before trudging away in a different direction.

JJ put her hands on her hips, completely dumfounded. She turned to Morgan, "Do people think I dress like this for fun?" She gestured to her clothes, "And you'd think sooner or later people would notice the badge too…gosh…"

Morgan chuckled at her reaction. "Come on." He started to weave through the crowds of people and JJ followed closely behind him, not sure where they were going. She didn't think he had any idea either.

The man who walked up to them before once again graced them with his presence. "I thought I told you…" His eyes met the badge that was clipped to Morgan's chest. "Oh, you're with the FBI…" His tone changed and his body language was a little more nervous now. He held out a hand to Morgan. "I'm Officer Harris, chief of police here. I'm sorry about earlier it's been pretty crazy around here since the murders started." He shook JJ's hand after Morgan's.

"I'm Agent Morgan and this is Agent Jureau. Where's the rest of our team?" Morgan asked, wasting no time to chat with the officer.

Officer Harris turned around, gesturing with his hand for them to follow. He led them through the crowd of people and over to a room with a shut door. He pushed it open to show the rest of their team sitting down around a table. "There you go." He smiled at them for a moment, before rushing off again.

JJ and Morgan walked into the room and sat down, greeting their friends nonchalantly.

"How's the media?" Hotch asked.

"They're getting desperate, we're gonna need to set up a press conference soon or things might get out of hand." JJ reported to him.

"Okay well I'll get Officer Harris to set one up for later, but now I want you, Morgan and Emily to question the parents. We need to find out where they were abducted and maybe if the unsub stalked them…anything that's off about them could help." Hotch nodded to them, "Rossi, Reid and I are going to check the dump sites so if you find anything call my cell." Everyone stood up at once and walked out of the room.

JJ was walking between Emily and Morgan as they started to approach the parents. They were all in chairs lined up against the wall, waiting. Most of them had tear stains on their cheeks, but the others were stone faced and blank. JJ knew that the one unaffected would be the hardest to ask questions to.

Emily kept her gaze forward. "How are we going to do this?" She asked as they entered one of the rooms that would be used for questioning. "Are we just going to call them in one by one?"

"I think that would be best." Morgan answered, looking out the window of the room they were in at some of the parents. He let out a gloomy sigh with his head hung slightly.

JJ bit her lip, trying to become more detached. She read Morgan's body language and realized that he was feeling the same thing she was; sympathy and compassion for these parents, but somehow he was going to overcome it, she knew he would. She just wasn't sure how she was going to. Her job was to be disconnected and that's what she would do. No getting too involved, no making hollow promises, and no getting attached to these parents. She would do her job and that was it.

The three of them exited the room, walking up to the first three parents in line. Morgan took the man while Emily and JJ took the two women.

"Hello." JJ gave the woman a comforting smile. "I'm Agent Jureau and I'm just going to ask you a few questions. What's your name?" She asked, leading her into the room that they would be doing the questioning in.

"Jillian Green." The woman answered and JJ recognized the last name from the second victim, Hogan. As they sat down, JJ pulled Hogan's case file out of a pile that she had sitting on the desk. She scanned it quickly before looking back up at Jillian.

"So your son was Hogan?" JJ met Jillian's red, puffy eyes.

Jillian smiled, her eyes clouded with memories of her son. "Yes." Her voice was barely a whisper.

"Where was the last place you saw Hogan before you reported him missing?" JJ asked, hoping to get the abduction site from that question.

"Ummm." Jillian paused in thought, "I dropped him off at school…I watched him go through the front doors, but that afternoon when I came to pick him up…he never came out." A tear slipped down her cheek.

JJ glanced down at the table, knowing the woman's grief. She was mother…she just knew. "Did you notice anything out of the ordinary before he got abducted?"

"No…not really. Everything was normal, soccer was just starting. He was the starting forward for his team." Jillian's eyes started swimming and she started at her hands which were folded on the table in between them.

JJ put a hand on Jillian's hands, comfortingly. The two women made meaningful eye contact before JJ spoke again, "Anything could help." She stopped for a second and Jillian started thinking, "Did he act different? Was there anyone taking a specific interest in you or him? Was there ever anyone you just thought acted a little weird towards you two?"

"No I didn't notice anything…I wish I could be more help." Jillian's eyes became downcast, staring at the surface of the table.

JJ patted her folded hands with reassurance. "You're helping more than you know. Umm…what did you do when you realized that Hogan wasn't coming out?"

"I parked the car and went inside to see if maybe the principal had him or if his teacher did, but he was nowhere to be found. The teacher also said that he hadn't shown up for his last class either. That was when I knew something was wrong."

"He didn't show up for his last class?" JJ was confused about that little detail. How would it be possible for him to disappear between classes with that many witnesses? This guy had to be working in the school to pull off a stunt like that.

"Yes. According to his teacher he was there for math, but never came back for science. They didn't think anything of it because they don't take attendance until the end of class at this school. They didn't even notice that he wasn't there…" A twinge of anger crossed the woman's face before her gaze became distant again.

"Well that's good. At least now we have a time frame for when he was taken and even though you may think that's a small contribution, it could be the thing that saves another child's life so thank you for letting us question you and I'm sorry for your loss. Hogan seemed like a great kid." JJ gave the woman sitting across from her a meaningful look.

"You have kids don't you?" Jillian smiled seeing the familiar motherly look in JJ's eyes, "Is it a boy or girl?"

"Boy. His name is Henry..." JJ rolled her eyes, "He just turned 5 so he's at the clingy stage. It's absolutely crazy." She knew that this was definitely building trust with her. They were empathizing with each other.

"It must be hard for you to be away from home now then." Jillian propped her head with her hand. "How do you do it?"

JJ was immediately reminded of the fight that she and Will had about that very topic before she had gone on a case in Kansas.

JJ walked out of Henry's bedroom and ran her fingers through her hair. "Ugh. I finally got him down." Henry had been fighting a cold for a few days now so it was a struggle to get him comfortable enough for bed. She walked towards Will.

"He still warm?" Will asked with his arms crossed over his chest. He leaned against the wall, staring at his wife as she walked up to him.

"Uhhh. Ibuprofen must have kicked in." JJ replied, leaning against the wall that was opposite Will.

"It's that pre-school. The place is like a petri-dish." Will looked down the hall towards their son's bedroom as JJ's phone beeped quietly from the bed. She walked over and checked it, seeing that it was a text from Garcia telling her that Hotch wanted them to come in. Will knew exactly what was happening so he spoke up, "I thought you had a few days off."

JJ read the text a second time, feeling guilty for leaving her husband again, but apparently two kids were dead. They needed the FBI's help. She gave her husband a silent stare, telling him that they needed her there.

Will scoffed slightly, "What's the case?"

"It's about some missing kids." JJ's eyebrows creased in thought.

"Guess you gotta go in then, huh?" Will walked away from her and over to the mirror where he started to take off his watch. He looked at her in the reflection.

"Please don't…walk away like that. We've talked about this. I know this is hard on you."

Will glanced down at the desk in front of him for a moment before responding, "Henry too." He reminded her without making eye contact.

"All of us." JJ corrected, "Look if I had someone to cover my shifts I would." She added, but when he didn't make eye contact again and started to take off his jacket she decided to go on, "What if it was Henry?" She looked down at the ground, horrified by the thought.

"Don't." Will turned around to look at her. "It's not Henry, Henry's right in there." He pointed towards the little boy's room.

"What if it was?" JJ persisted, meeting his eyes with a knowing stare. "You'd want someone out there looking for him." She pointed out.

Will nodded slowly and sat down on the bed. "I know, you're right…it's just…things worked better when you were at the Pentagon." He was staring at the ground.

"I wasn't helping anyone there, Will." JJ was staring straight at him with firm, blue eyes.

"You worked normal hours and weekends off." Will looked up at her, but she didn't meet his eyes. It was obviously not what she wanted.

"Fine, I'll tell them I'm…I can't come in." JJ started typing into her phone.

"Don't do that." Will sensed her hostility.

"I was supposed to have time off, Henry's not feeling well."

"It's alright." Will told her and she looked away from her phone, starting to say something, but he cut her off. "You should go; I'll take care of it."

"Agent Jureau?" Jillian woke her from her thoughts, but she recovered quickly.

"We make it work…somehow. My husband's great and he's a detective so he understand my situation." JJ shrugged. "I just wish Henry could be more independent sometimes, you know?"

"Oh trust me, one day you'll wish he was clinging to you…" Jillian smirked, "The next stage is when he'll start making other friends and forgetting all about you." She rolled her eyes. "Once Hogan was out so long with his friends that I called the police to report him missing, but it turned out he was just at a friend's house." She chuckled, but it faded quickly. "I never thought he would really be gone."

JJ blinked and they sat in silence for a moment as a silent memorial for the boy. "I'd be glad to see Henry be anything like Hogan was." She smiled and Jillian gave her a thankful nod. "Well, I think that's it for the questioning, but if you think of anything else you call me personally at this number." JJ scribbled it down on a piece of paper. "Or if you need to talk…being a mother and a profiler I might be able to help you cope…if you need it."

The woman stood up and nodded at JJ, "Thank you Agent Jureau." She slipped the piece of paper JJ had given her into her purse before walking out the door. After the door shut, JJ took a few minutes to herself just to think about the interview, but the only thing she could think about was the smiling picture of Hogan. He seemed like such a happy little boy, how could someone just take his life-like that? It was then that JJ realized that the only thing that she had told herself to prevent from happening had happened. She had gotten too attached and too personal with one of the victims. JJ sat forward in her chair and saw Hotch trudging out of the station with a blank expression on his face. How did he do that? How could he control his emotions like that? Maybe he just didn't care like she did. Everything that she had been taught as a child was unraveling before her. She'd been told that compassion was something that could never be bad. It was an emotion that gave you the power to sympathize with people while still having a desire to help, but now compassion is the enemy. If JJ wanted to get through this she would have to learn quickly how to control and push away her passion and emotions. She hoped that nothing would come of the connection she had already made, but a voice deep inside her, a devil's advocate, told her that later it was going to become a problem and it was going to affect the case.

She should have believed it.

"Compassion is sometimes the fatal capacity for feeling what it is like to live inside somebody else's skin. It is the knowledge that there can never really be any peace and joy for me until there is peace and joy for you too."

Frederick Buechner