"Cas? Cas!"

Dean drops to his knees, laying a hand on Castiel's shoulder.

"CAS! CAS! Wake up, come on please. Cas, I need you to wake up."

Rolling Castiel onto his back, Dean pressing a finger to his wrist. He can feel Castiel's pulse, and he sighs in relief. Sliding his arms under Castiel's back, Dean lifts the smaller boy off the floor and carries him to the couch. He carefully lays Cas's head on the pillow, brushing Cas's hair out of his eyes. He checks Cas's pulse again, frowning.

"Come on Cas," he mutters, "You need to wake up. I need you to wake up."

For almost ten minutes Dean watches Cas fearfully, the lump in his throat growing. Finally Castiel begins to stir, and Dean rushes to his side.

"Cas?"

"Mmm? Dean? What-"

"Cas, you passed out. You were getting the report and- Oh god," Dean's voice cracks.

"I'm fine. I just," Castiel starts to sit up, and Dean presses a hand against his chest.

"No way. You need to rest."

"Dean. I'm fine."

"No, Cas, you obviously aren't. When was the last time you ate?"

"Uh," Castiel hesitates, deciding whether or not to lie, "a few days ago, maybe. I don't know."

"A few days ago? Cas, you need to eat."

"Dean, I'm not hungry. I swear."

"Dammit, Cas. Come on."

Dean helps Castiel sit, and finally stand, supporting him with a hand around the smaller boy's waist. Castiel's legs are shaking, and Dean carries most of his weight.

"You need to lie down, and then I'm going to get you food. Where's your room?"

"Upstairs," Cas says quietly, leaning against Dean."

"Alright. Come on."

Dean leads Castiel slowly up the stairs, walking as slowly as Castiel needs. When the reach the top of the stairs, Cas gestures weakly toward his room. Castiel stumbles, nearly falling to the ground again and Dean picks him up, carrying Castiel the rest of the way to his room. Dean lays gently lays Castiel on his bed.

"Stay here. I'll be back. Don't move."

Castiel nods weakly, "I think I may fall asleep, Dean."

"Cas, that's okay."

Dean quietly closes the door, padding softly down the stairs. When he reaches the kitchen, Dean searches through the cabinets quietly, finally finding what he's looking for. In a few minutes, Dean has made a simmering pot of soup, and he smiles slightly. There is hardly anything he can cook, but the last thing his mom had taught him to make was soup. Dean searches through the drawers until he finds a ladle and pours a bowl of soup. Then, he grabs a spoon and a slice of bread from the toaster before heading back to Cas's room.

When he opens the door, he sees that Castiel has fallen asleep and he smiles. He quietly sets the soup on the edge of the desk and takes a seat in the chair, taking a moment to look at Cas's room for the first time. Immediately, he's fascinated by the photos on the walls. There are hundreds of photos on the wall, and they're all astonishing. Dean runs his hand lightly over the photos above Castiel's desk, and one immediately sticks out to him. It's from their trip to New York City and Dean instantly recognizes the setting. It's from just outside the Empire State Building, the last place they visited on their trip. The weather had turned bad, and their class was caught unaware. The people of New York City were prepared though, and they all had opened their umbrellas instantly. The picture above Castiel's desk is of a businessman in a dark suit, hurrying down the street with a dark umbrella. Dean wouldn't have remembered it, but he remembered watching Castiel freeze, pulling out his camera. The dark haired boy had taken only a moment to take the photo, but that was the first time that Dean had noticed him. Dean hears a soft cough from behind him and he lowers his hand, turning to face Castiel.

"Hey."

"Hey," Castiel's voice is quiet and weak.

"Do you want some soup?"

"Please," Cas nods slightly, reaching for the bowl.

Dean hands the bowl and spoon to him, but Cas's hands are shaking so hard that he can barely hold the bowl.

"Here."

Dean takes the bowl back from Castiel, setting it on the desk. He sits on the edge of the bed, helping Castiel sit up. He then fills the spoon with soup, raising it to Cas's lips. Castiel slurps gratefully, sighing as the warm liquid soothes his throat.

"More?"

Dean obliges his, lifting the spoon to Cas lips again and again until the soup is gone. Finally, he hands the bread to Castiel who tears it apart eagerly. When Castiel has finished the bread he looks up at Dean.

"Thank you."

"I-I, it's nothing."

"No, Dean, it is definitely something. I passed out and you made me soup and – thank you."

"Cas, it's just what anyone would have done. I was worried about you, and then you said that you hadn't eaten anything in days and I couldn't leave you like that," Dean trailed off, realizing that he was babbling.

Castiel smiled, looking up at Dean.

"Thank you, Dean."

"Uh, you're welcome," Dean blushes slightly.

"Hey Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"Can have more soup? Please?"

Dean nods, grabbing the bowl from the desk. He quickly walks downstairs, filling the bowl of soup for Cas and grabbing another bowl for himself. When he returns to Cas's room, Castiel is sitting up further and more of the color has returned to his cheeks. Dean hands him the bowl, and the shaking in his hands has calmed enough for him to eat the soup by himself. Castiel quickly eats the soup, and most of Dean's is still remaining when Castiel sets his bowl on the desk. Dean is sitting on the foot of Cas's bed and their eyes meet, only for Cas's to flick down to Dean's lap. Dean smiles slightly, handing his bowl to Cas.

"Hungry?"

"I- yeah."

"Cas, what happened?"

"I've been," Castiel pauses, "I've been sick."

Dean can tell that he's lying, but he doesn't press.

"Are you getting better?"

"I don't know. I think so. I hope so."

Castiel sips his soup slowly, enjoying the warmth. He'd been starving, but he'd been afraid to eat. Now that Dean was, here he'd had to and he instantly felt better. He runs a hand through his hair, suddenly becoming aware of how bad he looked. His hair was a mess and it'd been almost a week since he'd showered. His clothes were rumpled and his breath was horrid. He moves to stand, only for Dean's hand to fly to his leg.

"Please. Stay here."

Cas's breathe hitches, and he sinks back onto the bed. Simply standing up had exhausted him, and he sighed.

"Okay."

Dean realizes his hand is still resting lightly on Cas's thigh, and he quickly draws back. Dean can feel the heat rising to his cheeks, and he pulls further away from Cas.

"Are you feeling better?"

"Yes, thanks to you. You don't have to stay anymore."

"I don't mind, but you should rest. I'm going to go downstairs and clean up."

"I'll try to sleep."

Dean smiles, and he watches Cas make himself comfortable on his bed. He leaves the room, leaving the door cracked open. He pads down the stairs, making his way to the kitchen. He takes the soup off the stove, emptying it into a refrigerator dish and placing the empty pot in the sink. He takes a few minutes to clean up the kitchen before returning to Castiel's room. The other boy is asleep, and Dean sits quietly at Cas's desk. He waits for almost an hour, but when it becomes evident that Cas won't wake up anytime soon, Dean gathers his things. He'd shed his coat by Cas's bed, and his phone was lying on the desk. He wrote a note to Cas, explaining that he was leaving and that Cas could text him if he needed anything. Dean quietly closed the door to Castiel's room as he left, walking slowly down the stairs.

Cas woke almost three hours after Dean left, sitting up quickly. His eyes searched the room looking for Dean, but his eyes fall on the empty chair. He stands, noticing the note.

Cas-

I have to go home, but I hope you're feeling better. You can text me anytime.

-Dean

Cas sighs as he reads Dean's note, frowning slightly. He'd hoped that Dean would at least stay until he woke up, but he figured it was too much to ask. Cas sinks onto his bed, his head in his hands. He feels better now, but Cas is still exhausted. Castiel wishes that he hadn't woken up alone. Now there's nothing stopping Cas. He stands, walking softly to the closet, reaching for the box he hasn't touched in weeks. The gleaming blade is still there, and Cas picks it up in relief.

The cold blade pierces his soft skin, and Castiel sighs. He hasn't felt anything in weeks, and the sharp pain is a relief. The blood wells on the curve of his wrist, and Castiel watches as it drips onto his bed; on any other day, he'd try to stop it, but today he can't bring himself to care. Cut after cut, drip after drip, and finally Cas begins to feel better. He sets the blade in its ox, but not before carefully wiping it clean. As quickly as the relief comes, it is replaced by a feeling of shame. It'd been so long since Cas had felt anything, but now that he finally did it meant that he'd given in. Castiel lays down, pulling his comforter over him. He knows that he should clean his wrist, but he can't bring himself to; he just doesn't care.

Castiel has just fallen asleep when he hears his phone go off and he rolls over, noticing a new message from Dean. He sets his phone down, not bothering to reply. His eyes fall shut, and he doesn't wake until late the next morning. When he does, he has five new messages from Dean.

Cas? You awake yet?

Obviously not. Sorry, I'll let you sleep.

G'nite Cas. Sleep well.

Feeling better?

Cas? You okay?

K. I'll stop texting you.

Cas sighs, reading the texts from Dean. He replies to Dean's messages as soon as he can.

Yeah, I'm better. I just woke up, so that's why I wasn't texting you. See you in school?

Cas sends the message to Dean, setting down his phone before he makes his way downstairs. He opens the fridge, seeing a container full of the soup Dean made yesterday and he smiles. Dean had been so nice. Castiel takes the container from the fridge, dumping a little bit of it into a bowl. Cas puts the bowl into the microwave, heating it up for two minutes. When the timer goes off, Cas jumps. Lately, he's been more jumpy than usual and he can't figure out why.

Cas eats the soup quickly before heading back upstairs. He collapses into bed when he reaches his room, and he's asleep in seconds. Dean texts him back, but Cas is soundly asleep when his phone goes off.

Get better Cas. I'll see you in school.

It's another week before Castiel returns to school, and he only goes back because he needs to make sure he doesn't fail any of his classes for the semester. Most of his teachers are understanding, and his grades are still good enough. They aren't nearly as good as before, but that's just the way things are. Castiel doesn't see Dean at all the first morning that he's back, and he wonders if the other boy is ignoring him. He finally sees Dean outside the school after all their classes are over.

"Cas?"

Before Cas has time to respond, Dean is hugging him. Timidly, Cas puts his arms around Dean.

"Cas, I'm so glad that you're back."

"You are?" Cas asks quietly.

"Of course. I need you."

"You what?"

"I said, I need you to help me with physics. I'm so confused."

"Oh," Castiel says, frowning a little, "Well, I'm free after school, if you wish we can meet at the library."

Dean's demeanor changes, and the shift doesn't go unnoticed by Castiel.

"No, I'm busy tonight. Goodbye Castiel."

Dean walks away quickly, leaving Castiel staring after him in confusion.