Chapter 4: The Angel

Clara sobbed and sobbed until she couldn't physically produce any more tears. She rested the Doctor's head in her lap and squeezed his hand so hard she was sure it would have hurt had he been alive.

She had always supposed that the Doctor would die saving the universe, or something else of vast importance, not a fragile little human like herself that would be gone in a blink of the eye of eternity. She felt guilty and selfish. How many others in the future were counting on his help that now will never come? How many futures have been changed? How many lives will now never exist?

"You idiot." she punched him lightly. "You wonderful, stupid idiot. It was my fault anyway. You were just trying to keep us safe, and I had to blow up on you like that." she sobbed into the hollow of his neck. "This would have never happened if I hadn't been so selfish."

She nestled herself in his arms and cried herself to sleep.

…..

The next morning, she awoke in her Tardis bedroom. Somehow, she had slept so peacefully throughout the night that for one oblivious moment, she almost forgot what had happened the day before.

"Doctor!" She shot up in bed, dazed and confused. Had this all been one terrible dream from the Dream Crabs? Everything came crashing back to her with a start, and the hole that was torn open in her heart ached for the Time Lord. She let out a whimper and attempted to burrow back into the warm blankets for comfort.

Suddenly, the Doctor shimmered into life. He stood wisely at the foot of her bed with an ancient smile on his well-worn face.

"Doctor!" Clara gasped. She hesitantly reached forwards to touch him. "Please, Doctor."

Her hands met only air.

"Hard light hologram, I'm afraid," the Doctor answered her unspoken question.

"No." Clara choked out.

"If you can see this message, that means that I am dead. Expired. Gone!" He gestured wildly, "By now, the Tardis has materialized my body to God-knows-where, and has materialized you into your bed, sorry for the rude awakening, by the way."

The holo-Doctor chuckled briefly and continued, "You've finally gotten rid of me. No more appearing in your bedroom at two in the morning to bother you about fish people, no more ruining your dates, no more of the space drama that I drag you into."

"Oh, Doctor." Clara's whole body was wracked with violent sobs. "I didn't mind any of that." Refusing to believe her hands, she never stopped reaching out for him, meeting thin air every time.

"So do one last thing for me, Teach," the hologram smiled faintly, "Have a good life. Go canoodle with some new boyfriend or something. The Tardis has been programmed to take you home. Lock her up and throw away the keys. Just let her become some odd thing in an alley that everyone walks by. In time, you pudding brains will move on, and the box will be buried."

"Basically, just forget about the stupid old man in the blue box," he grinned.

The hologram took a step forward and peered at her with such a warm gaze that it immediately struck her as strange to see such a look on the face she was so used to seeing in a permanent scowl.

"You were wonderful, Clara. It has been my honor to babysit the Earth, my adopted home. I walked your Earth, I breathed your air. Thank you for sharing it with a grumpy old alien like me. I have always enjoyed our adventures together, Clara. From the moment I dragged you from the wifi-creatures and into my snog box, I knew you would be special."

"So get on with your life, my Clara. Become a queen with your 'infinite knowledge of the future,' or something," the hologram echoed. The image began to glitch and faded slightly from view.

"No, no, no! Don't go! How can I give up this? Tell me what to do, Doctor!" Clara begged the hologram.

The fading hologram found her hand and gripped it tightly. Clara gasped and immediately fell silent. The hand in hers was warm, vibrating, and real. The holo-Doctor gave her one final squeeze.

"Goodbye, Clara."

In an instant, the image flickered and faded from existence. The hand covering hers vanished. Nothing remained to prove that the hologram was ever there, save for the tingling warmth it left behind.

Clara broke and curled into herself, her body long unable to create more tears. She huddled against her comforter and held on for dear life. "Oh, Doctor." she whispered. Even with the death of Danny and her own mother, she had never experienced such a crippling grief as this.

…

The next day, Clara finally managed to make herself take a shower and freshened up her puffed up face.

"If he was impressed with my eyes, he should see my face right now." she chuckled sadly to herself, "Recently It's been so puffed up and inflated. It's becoming ridiculous."

It was another several days before Clara finally packed her things and left the Tardis. She patted the console lovingly and sighed. "Well, old girl, I guess it's goodbye. I know you never have really liked me, and that's understandable. I really gave him hell, didn't I?"

The lights pulsated dimly and the ship let out a low warble in agreement.

"Oi, don't be like that. I'm trying to end this on a nice note. Thank you for materializing me in my bedroom that night. Thank you for all the adventures." she gave the beloved ship one last affectionate stroke and exited into the dark London alleyway just behind her apartment complex.

The air was bitingly cold and she immediately wished that she had nicked one of the Doctor's hoodies. "Blimey," she shivered. Luckily, her apartment was only on the third floor so it wasn't too far of a walk.

She strode off on her way, never a moment going by where she didn't think of the adventures she had with her beloved Doctor.

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Weeks passed. Eventually, Clara returned to her job as an English teacher at Coal Hill. Autumn was coming to a close, and it was almost time for her students to leave on their Christmas break.

She couldn't wait for the break. These past few weeks had been the hardest days of her life. For once, she had nothing else to look forward to. No upcoming dates with Danny, no possibility of the Doctor materializing in the school closet to take her to some exiting new planet, and no family in town.

"Looks like it's just you and me for Christmas, old girl." Clara rubbed the painted wood of the Tardis fondly. As she had been doing for weeks, every day she wrapped herself up in an oversized coat, pulled up a chair, and graded her papers beside the ancient time machine.

She told the old ship about her daily adventures: how the students were doing, how the day went, and what it was like to walk past Danny's math class in the hall every day and see a new man standing there- continuing the lessons as if nothing had ever happened. Telling that story, she chuckled sadly. "Talk about déjà vu." she had muttered.

Today, Clara rounded the bend to her secluded alley with a stack of semester exam reviews in her arms, of which she could barely see over. Leaves and small flurries of snow whirled softly around her feet as if clearing a path for her and her huge stack.

The Tardis stood there, as striking and impassive as ever, now covered in a thin layer of snow. The windows were frosted over, and the lock was frozen shut. Though Clara still hadn't thrown away the keys, and she was sure that the Tardis would let her in anyways at the snap of her fingers, she never attempted to reenter the familiar old machine.

It was probably much warmer in there, with better surfaces to grade papers on than her lap, but Clara was content to sit outside and watch the leaves dancing among the snowflakes. She smiled sadly and leaned her head back against the wood paneling of the ship. She took in a deep breath and sighed.

"It sure is quiet without him around, isn't it?"

The Tardis made no response, but Clara could feel her somber agreement in the back of her mind. Since her revival, she had been able to telepathically communicate with the Tardis much easier than before. Sometimes, she could even hold short conversations with the Tardis if she concentrated hard enough.

Every once in a while, she could even pick up some of the thoughts and emotions of her students, especially if they came too close to her. A perk was that she always knew when someone needed help or was cheating, but all the chatter in her head was driving her insane.

For the first few days back on the job, she had gotten complaints about being too cranky with the students, but after what she had been through, and with the constant buzzing in her mind, she chose to ignore the complaints. Once she figured out how to erect barriers to cut out most of the chatter, her mood improved and the complaints disappeared.

Clara continued to grade papers well into the evening, occasionally sipping hot tea from the thermos she brought. Usually these kinds of temperatures would drive her indoors, but lately the weather hadn't bothered her as much as it used to.

"Maybe I picked up some of his traits, eh?" she asked the Tardis. "No wonder I've been so grumpy."

The day turned into night. The snow had stopped a while ago, but the wind was ripping through the alley viciously. The Tardis had turned on her top light for Clara to see, but after nearly losing more than a few papers to the wind, Clara finally stood up to leave.

"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow." She packed her things and waved to the box. She giggled to herself, "I'd better stay away from any normal human beings." She let out a laugh, "How must I look right now to everyone else. Once they find out what I've been doing, they'll think I'd finally lost it. They'd lock me up for talking to a phone box all day."

Suddenly, a rough looking man blasted into her alley. Clara's laugh died in the wind and her eyes widened in shock. He wore chains and leather, and upon closer inspection, seemed to also be carrying a gun in his gloved fist.

He skidded to a halt in front of her and brandished the handgun from his jacket. "Gimme your purse! Hurry up!" he snarled.

Clara whimpered, staring down the nose of the gun inches from her face. She'd had a gun pointed to her face many times before while traveling with the Doctor, but she always had him to protect her. Somehow, she was never afraid with him because she always knew he would have her back.

Not knowing what else to do, she dropped the papers and held her hands up in surrender. "I...I don't have my purse with me. This is just my teacher's bag. All it has are pencils and papers in it." she couldn't keep the tremble out of her voice.

"Don't you dare lie to me!" the thug pressed the cold tip of the gun into her temple. "Give me the bag! Now!"

She handed him the bag, "Please don't hurt me. I'm just trying to get home."

He emptied the contents of the bag. Pens, pencils, and random pieces of paper flurried out into the wind to scatter down the alley with the rest of the reviews. "This is rubbish!"

"I told you," she muttered under her breath.

"What did you say to me!?" He charged her suddenly, pressing the gun harder to the side of her head and cocking the weapon.

"I'll get what I want one way or another!" he growled. His foul breath frosted in the freezing air and covered her face. He was so close to her, she could have touched his course beard had she moved her face at all. She swallowed thickly, no longer able to speak.

'He's going to kill me.' she realized with a sinking pit of anxiety.

She squeezed her eyes shut and prepared for the blast that would end her life. She straightened up, ready to take it. Death didn't sound too bad at the moment. It would be an escape from this hell, she reasoned. She tightened her grip on the bricks of the building behind her and held her breath.

But nothing ever came.

She could no longer hear or smell his panting breath anymore. She no longer sensed his angry presence in her mind; however, the Tardis seemed to be excited about something. Without letting her guard down, she peeked an eye open.

She screamed in horror.

There, standing mere inches from her, was a Weeping Angel. It had its face covered with its hands. A metallic taste lingered in the air where the thug had no doubt been transported to another time and space. She wondered briefly why the Angel didn't attack her while her eyes were closed, but none of that mattered now.

She poured all her concentration into slowly backing away while never taking her eyes off the Angel and never blinking. Her eyes stung against the dry freezing wind. She continued to back up slowly in silent horror from the alley and across the adjacent street. "Please, God, don't let me die again. I just got back." she panted out, slightly hyperventilating, "Oh, Doctor, where are you when I need you?"

A large truck she didn't see coming lumbered by in the street in front of her, obstructing her view of the Angel.

Everything went dark.