Bella doesn't feel loved cause her mom left her when she was younger and her dad, who's always at work doesn't seem to care about her. She stays strong but inside she's already dying. What happens when she meets someone who's seven years older than her? Will she finally feel what it is to be loved and be cared about?

Why does time pass by so fucking slow when I'm in school? I don't get it. It's just 11:25am and I really, really wish I could go home right now. What if I act as if I'm sick and I really need to go home? Yup, I'll try this shit.

I excuse myself telling Mrs. Greene, I needed to go to the clinic and might go home and sleep and shit. I brought my bag with me because I was sure I'm going home.

I told the nurse I had a seriously bitchy head ache and needed to go home. She kept on touching my forehead and then looking at me with a confused face. I avoid eye contact. Because reasons.

And finally she let me go. I made my way towards my truck and hop in, I didn't go home right away of course. I went to the library in port angeles. It's one of the places I go to most of the time. It's peaceful and quiet.

After a while of finding the right book, I sat on the floor and made sure no one was looking and for a while, I got lost in the book. I don't if I can ever explain the feelings I get while I'm reading an excellent book. Believe me, I've read a lot..like a lot and then when it comes to an end, I feel so emotional and just cry and shit because it's the end or something. There are some books I've read and even though the endings are happy and just...ugh it's still sad because you know it's the end. Especially if it isn't a sequel. That is so heartbreaking and you can't do anything about it.

I stayed in the library for a about more than 4 hours because I'm that crazy. And then I saw him. Again, and this is like the..wait let me think. First, on the beach. Second, in the supermarket and then now. Is this some kind of game god is playing? or something? Because like, you know what I fucking mean.

I sighed and walked my way toward this god who looks confused as fuck.

EPOV

I'm a guy and I fucking love reading. It's strange to me that some or most of the people don't like reading and they'll always say shit like movies are more interesting than reading a book. Yeah I admit, it's always nice to watch a movie because you could just see it and don't need to use your imagination. But seriously? If you're really focusing in reading and all, after a few chapters, you'll actually feel like you're inside the book and you realize you're using your wild imaginations. And you feel like you're not reading anymore, do you know what I mean? I hope you do.

I feel sorry for those who don't like reading. But no offense, though.

The first book I've read without pictures? was called 'On the Road' by Jack Kerouac. I was 14 back then and I enjoyed the book so much. I love Dean's character. And that book will forever be my favorite, it's just excellent.

I was listening to a song by Radiohead when I remembered the girl. The most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on, I swear the moment that I saw her..crying with her hair almost covering half of her face and the way she looked at me, scared and she calms down a bit because I tell her I won't hurt her, I knew I'll fall for her..soon.

I just felt sad she was crying. I wanna make her happy, I want to take away the pain she's feeling. The look on her face shows it all, that she's having a hard time and I want to know why..I just want to. She looks so hurt when I saw her at the beach..so fragile and vulnerable I just wanted to hold her in my arms and whisper comforting words like it's all gonna be okay though I know, deep down, my words wouldn't mean anything because she doesn't know me and I'm just a stranger and she probably thinks I'm a creep.

She stopped crying and walked away, going to her truck. I wanted to laugh at her old truck but that would have been rude so I just introduced myself and she doesn't. I just wanted to be friendly, but I guess it was the wrong timing. So I tell her I'll be around and she left.

I'm new in Forks and duh, it's a small town. I could see her any time, unless she locks herself in her house. It's weird that my parents met here and then they both moved to Chicago and then I got in the way and we stayed there until I finished college. Then I moved out and toured around the fucking world. I've been to many countries so far and I ended up here. I'm a photographer. It's just that, I love taking pictures of the nature and sometimes, people. I want to take pictures of her. And save it in my phone, laptop, computer or any device I own and make it my wallpaper. But then that's like..not good. Because she's not my girlfriend or anything. But..but yeah.

I have this exhibition next month or so where I show the pictures I've taken and some of the people who finds it interesting will hopefully buy it and blah fucking blah shit. Most of the pictures I would be showing are the amazing nature around us. The places I've been. And also, the people who was okay with me taking pictures of em.

Then I went to a library to just find something to read because as a matter fact as I've mentioned before, I love reading and with some twist kind of way, she's here reading and I don't know if I should walk away or talk to her or just ignore her and do my purpose of why I'm here but then she'll be all like 'what am I doing here' or maybe not.

Because the next thing I know, she's coming towards me and I had to look at my sides to see if maybe she wasn't going towards me but then no one was beside me and she's near and there's an expression in her face that I can't seem to describe.

BPOV

We stared at each other and finally I said, "I'm sorry for being to rude to you, I'm Bella." A little to quickly but then he raises his hand in front of me and we shakes hands which was weird. I thought guys weren't like this anymore. He's such a gentleman. "It's fine. I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable or something..I didn't mean to."

I smile at him and then things got awkward because we were just looking into each other's eye and then I look away. "Why don't we get a drink? and...just talk?" He asks and I think about it for a while.

There wasn't anything to lose and there's not much to do in the house anyway and I've read a book already and.."Yeah, sure." And then he flashes me his crooked smile that made me blush and scream inside.

"What would you like to drink? Or would you like to eat? What's your favorite food?" He asks and I had to bit my lip from laughing because he said it so fast and sounded really nervous. I was nervous too, by the way.

"I don't know, what would you like to drink?" I ask him instead to make it easier for him.

"Well I like some red wine, right now for some odd reasons and uh..how old are you?"

"21." I lied.

"Oh really?" He looks impressed and a smirk was forming in his lips. "Yeah.." I said.

"Liar."

"I'm serious."

"No, you're not."

"I am."

"Nope."

I scowl at him and he chuckles, "you are so not 21, you look so young for god's sake." I realize we were starting to get comfortable with each other, we were still in his car and just driving around.

"What do I look like?" I ask him.

"Hmm..17? or 18? or wait, 16?" He says and I look at him to see him laughing.

"I'll be 18 on May 13." I tell him, and I don't know why I did. I just felt..okay with it and that's what matters.

"Really, well then, advance happy birthday Bella." Whoa! That was the first time he ever said my name and it sounded like sex. Oh god, what am I even saying.

"Thank you, Edward." And he grins at me, like a boyish grin. So childish..but cute.

.

.

.

.

We ended up being in a restaurant because it got really late and it was almost time for dinner and yeah, I didn't know if this is a date but there's food, and if there is then I guess it's fine. I am hungry, after all.

I ordered a mushroom ravioli and he ordered spaghetti, a pasta and a special salad for the both of us. Then, of course, the red wine for him and I just ordered a soda.

We ate and spoke between bites, he told me he's a photographer because he liked taking pictures since he was around 7 or 8 and I find that cute for no reason. He says he just moved here and he'll stay for a while. He asked me questions and I tell him I'll be graduating in May and will be moving to Seattle and study college there and I just had no idea how it was so comfortable talking to him.

"So Bella, where do you live?" He asks as I fix the seat belt.

"Somewhere." I decided to be just be a little playful.

"Be more specific."

"I live near the forest."

"Everyone does. I do."

"Hmm, I'll just show you the way.."

I tell him the directions and I just kept looking at him and I was right, he is the mos beautiful person I've ever seen in my life. Plus, he's a gentleman and he seems so kind and just..amazing.

Charlie's car was there and another car, too. He has a visitor?

"Well, here we are." I tell him and before I got out of the car he asked, "Can we do this again?"

I didn't know if I wanted to to that again and I'm just confused with how I just spent the entire day or half of the day with him..a person I barely knew. Do I trust him? I don't know. This is all new to me.

But I answered 'yes' anyway because the look on his face, the hopeful look on his face just made me say yes and I had fun and for the first time in my life, I felt happy inside. And it felt so good. Maybe I really wanted to do it again.

"Uh, good night." I whisper and he replies the same as I got out of the car.

He doesn't leave just yet, he left when I was already on the porch of Charlie's house. I realize I forgot my keys and I had to ring the bell. Charlie must be so mad. Shit.

And because he wasn't the one who opened it, I panicked.

It was Jacob.

He's here.

Jacob.

Is.

Here.

Now, what does this fucking mean?

Is he here for me..again?

When I was sixteen, Jacob wanted to marry me and my father agreed but only if I was already of age. Because it wasn't legal to marry someone who's below 18. I thought he wasn't serious, but then he wasn't and now Jacob is going to propose to me.

Jacob is not a good guy. Okay, I don't really know. I mean I don't want to judge him but he's my dad's age and I can't. I don't like him, he has this creepy look like he wants to kill me or something.

I can't marry him. I just don't want to.

"I'm not gonna marry you, Jacob." I said, angrily. Then my dad grabs my elbow and we went to the kitchen while Jacob stayed in the living room, holding a box in his hand.

Charlies tells me I have to marry this guy because he would pay him some serious amount of money. I wanted to slap and be angry at my dad because he was willing to, like, sell me. But then I didn't because he doesn't care about me, but I'm 18 that meant my own decisions.

I fucking hate them both. Jacob was willing to pay my dad for me..and god know what he would do to me. And my so called dad, who's a police, wouldn't do anything about it. And just..shit.

"I don't want to marry him!" I yelled at him and out of nowhere, his hand slaps my face and it hurts like a bitch, that I cried and the pain was almost unbearable. I ran out of the house into my truck and headed to the beach.

I look at the mirror in my truck and saw that the side of my face is red and I'm sure some parts of it will bruise. I can't go to school like this.

God, the tears can't seem to stop falling.

My dad never hit me.

I was thankful he didn't when I was young, so he didn't child abuse me or anything. But he didn't care and love me and that hurts like his slap earlier or maybe even more. But still, I cried harder until I couldn't breathe and then a familiar voice comes from behind me and this time, I don't get scared or panicked.

I hug him instead because I needed it and finally, his arms surrounds me and he lets me cry on his chest and I felt awful for wetting his shirt but then I'm just glad, deep down, he's here.

Hey babies! How is life?

Oh..uh, is this worth continuing? or should I stop cause it's shit?

I have no idea.

Thanks to those who reviewed though, you just make me smile.

PLEASE REVIEW.

~Sam

xoxo