Yes! I have decided to have chapter names. (more on the significance of it below)

I slam on the door to Cal's room. I'm flustered but still in my right mind. I'm determined to make peace and end this once and for all. If we're going to do this, we're going to do this together. He comes out leisurely still putting on a shirt, with an expression that is half worried and half annoyed.

You can tell he's tired and just wants to be left alone. "What Mare?" he asks, his voice still kind of rough. He already knew it was me.

"How did you know?"

"I told you," he replays in a matter of fact tone, "I know you." His eyes are dull and there are heavy dark circles under his eyes. "Plus no one bangs on the door this early," he adds kind of jokingly as a way to lighten the mood. It doesn't work.

No you don't. He doesn't know me at all, no matter what he wants to believe. I don't even know myself. But still, I smile at the corny line. It warms my heart nonetheless, and I allow the smallest of smiles to spread. "Let's go," I say, tilting my head towards the hall and making a motion towards his arm.

"The meeting's not until—" He starts, but too late. I was already pulling him along in a rushed manner, and he lets me. Let's do this before I change my mind. He's hustling behind me but doesn't say a word. We're almost at the bottom of the stairs before I even speak again.

"If we're going to do this, we're going to do it my way, no questions asked." He opens his mouth. "Ah! No talking." I put a finger to my lips. His arm is still my grasp as we're gliding through the passageways. I must look like a mad woman, banging on someone's door and dragging them somewhere without talking or explaining. Well that's the person I am and if he knows me so well they he should know what to expect by now.

He nods and silently follows quickly. He's confused for a second, but it doesn't take him long to catch up on what's going on. But when he does, he has this expression of gratitude on his face that kind of makes it all seem worth while. Almost. "Mare, I—" his voice cracks just a little.

"I said no talking." My voice is stern but I can't help the little smile that formed. The look on his face is a sight for sore eyes, and it creates this feeling in me which I still can't quite explain. This, I tell myself, this is the reason why you're doing this. For him. For that very look on his face that says everything he can't. I just hope he remembers this moment in the future. Please remember the lengths I'll go for you, and how much you mean to me. I'm being dark again I know, but if you lived our lives, you'll see the unpredictability of it and how much can change in sheer seconds.

As, we're nearing the gates I feel a jolt pulling me back and I turn around to see Cal dead in his tracks. His face what was once gratified is now blank. There's no emotion, you can't read anything off of him. Which is unusual, considering that it's Cal and usually you can read how he's feeling or what he's thinking like a book. But not now. His eyes are dark and if you can look ever so closely, you'll notice that he's biting on his inner cheek. He's scared.

I touch his shoulder, "It's going to be all right," I try to give an encouraging smile, but it's not working because well, I'm scared too.

It's funny, the two people on Earth who has the most hatred for the same person is suddenly scared to face him head on. I look around a the forsaken cemetery so cleverly disguised as an arena. It takes me back to the fight, which was essentially an execution, and what I felt as the memory precedes. I can remember blood, crys of pain, anger, and laughter. One so cruel and vicious that I don't believe it came from my own mouth. There was cheering, shouting, resentment, but no words ever exchanged between me and him. He didn't even fight back. In the moment I never realized it, too blinded by the animosity, vengeance and disgust I felt for him. It would be nice to have some of that raging in me now, but all I have is this ache of dread that doesn't seem to go away. What's the difference from that moment with this? Why am I feeling two sheer, unmitigated feelings? I breathe a deep breath; because this time I'm actually talking with the bastard. I'm confronting him, something I never thought I would let him have the chance to do. I haven't said one word to him since the day he threw me into the arena and I hadn't plan to ever since. There are no words you can say to a person that evil who's so far gone that a moral compass for them doesn't exist; but alas, those weren't the cards I was dealt. I had gotten a fainted boy, an estranged brother, and a damaged soul, so you play the best with the cards you get.

I believe that there's three types people in this world. The ones who acknowledge the weakness within them: fear, pain, sadness; and use that to their advantage. It helps them build character, to learn from it; those people acknowledge their weaknesses and ultimately overcome it by accepting that their life cannot go on without the balance of happiness and sadness and grow to live harmoniously with it forever. They are the happiest.

The second person is quite the opposite; so arrogant that they believe that they have no fear nor pain. They trick themselves into believing that weaknesses do not lie beneath them for they are too great for such feelings. Nothing can harm them physical or not, mental or reality for it is all the same. They are the mighty and the mighty do not fall. Those people who can only exist by the mere lies they have tell to go to sleep each night.

Finally there's me, the ones who admit their flaws and deficiencies but cannot bear the thought of living aside such great pain and suffering day to day so they learn to push them away. So deep within their minds in fact, that the memories won't be called upon until an absolute necessity, if can. They will live their lives with a little spot of despair in their hearts that they cannot quite place but is always a reminder to a past, a dangerous one. We are the cowards. Every one of these people are different, unique in their own ways; but all share one common trait: once you lose innocence to something, the bliss of not knowing, it can never be restored no matter how hard you try.

Cal shakes his head wearily, "I need you to promise me something," he grabs my hands suddenly, so tight I thought my knuckles would turn white.

I nod signaling for him to go on.

"Once this is over," he looks at his feet. I open my mouth to speak but he shakes his head again, "No Mare, listen to me," his voice firm but weak at the same time. Cal slowly glances up at my face though avoiding my eyes, "promise me that you'll…" he breaths, "that you'll forgive me." his face contorts painfully for a little before he finally lets his eyes meet mine in a blend of bronze and brown that reminds me of warmer times, the happy ones. Though nothing about this certainly feels happy.

What do I say? Yes? No? Do I stay silent or will that be an even worse response than any? I want to ask what's wrong, what is happening, but we're so far into this mess that there's no use turning back to analyze or reexamine. What good would that do for us, for me? That will only make matters worse than it already is and raise more doubts than those I am already feeling. Right now Cal is the only person I can depend on, who knows my misery like the back of his hand. We share so much and I can't afford to turn away from another person that I trust. Even if that trust is based on me turning the other cheek. So I say what any person would say in a moment like this, I nod my head and softly utter out, "Of course." Though what he does next sets the whole track awry.

He grabs me close and kisses me. Sinking his lips to mine in a motion that shows that he doesn't want to let go. I kiss him back with all the sincerity in my heart and let him take me along with the rhythm. For a moment, a brief moment, the colors around us melts together in a whirlwind of emotion and hue. In that tiny moment is the happiest that I have felt in a long time and like Cal, I do not want it to end. Unfortunately all fairytales have a happy ending. Or in my case, an ending.

"I love you," he whispers so faintly if I hadn't been the distance from him I wouldn't have heard. Our foreheads are still pressed against each other and I know that he could feel me tense up when he said it.

My stomach is spinning in circles and the wind of color instantly dies. I can feel in my heart that theres a pit that's closing in and it's as though my brain has shut down, eliminating any farther thoughts or mobility. The silence is the worse, you can hear when he held his breath in the anticipation of the moment and his heart pounding underneath his wrist. There are only three choices in this moment and I know only one is the right one. I can either say how I feel, say what he wants to hear, or say what I want to say. I went with, "Me too." I can't tell which one it is.

He nods knowingly and lets out the soft gasp of air he has been holding in. With a small smile on his face, his eyes still glowing, he leads the way assuredly and determined into the belly of the beast.

We walk in. It's dark and damp just like I remember, and the smell of wet moss is pungent. There's no one at the front except a guard at the end of the hall who stands up straighter and tighter at the sight of us. He salutes and announces our names to the only prisoner there, although surely the most dangerous one.

"Mare." Maven immediately stands up at the sight of me and walks forward to the front of his cell. I take a step back. His voice is deeper, and there's this edge to it, a new edge I haven't heard before. It's as though he's cautious of everything he says, and is afraid that whatever comes out isn't what's supposed to. His clothes are torn and ragged, if possible he's even paler and leaner than before. He's so different from the last time I've seen him. His hair no long glossy black, short and neat, but long and dull, The lack of sleep seems to put pounds underneath his eyes and you can tell how tired he is by the simple movements he makes.

Everyone is silent, looking at each other's faces as to make out how they're feeling without actual words. No one dares start the conversation. What is there to say? I never wanted this. What do you say to the one person who ruined your life? What do you say to the human being you've been running from for the past two years? You don't say anything because they don't deserve words.

Finally though, Maven starts, "I appreciate you coming here."

No response.

He tries again, "I know through everything that you have a perfectly good reason why you don't want to see me."

Do you?

He reaches a hand out to me, causing me to move back in disgust, and he grabs a bar instead, "Say something, anything."

Still no response.

"You don't understand Mare, that person out there? The one ruling the world for two years? That wasn't me!" He looks bewildered, eyes wide and hands griped tighter than ever.

Oh god he's crazy. "Oh so was that your evil twin brother?" I scoff at his useless excuse, not able to contain my silence any longer. He truly is unbelievable. "You expect me to believe that that wasn't you. The one out there killing innocent reds, the one who burned my family's house down," control you temper Mare, "the one who lied to my face for I don't know… a year?" My blood boils, and I don't know where this sudden rush of emotions is coming from. "Then threw me into an arena like I was nothing for my certain death. So yeah, I'm sorry if I don't believe you right now." I try to level my anger but lightning flickers within my veins, yearning to be let free towards Maven. The sight of him breathing, speaking, walking makes me want scream. He doesn't deserve to live, not after everything he's done, not after everything he's taken. "So you better come up with a better excuse if you want to actually convince anyone." I don't expect an honest answer, let alone one. He's at the end of the line, whatever comes out of his now will only be a desperate cry to live.

"Because…" his voice hesitant, "I love you." his tone and eyes seem so sincere, that for a spilt second I actually thought what was coming out of his mouth was actually true. But that was only for a second. I had remembered that anything out of a snake's mouth are lies.

I was right, he is delusional. I laugh out loud because that was the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Monster's aren't capable of love, silly thing. Is that the best thing he can do? "Oh! Very nice acting!" I let my condescending applaud echo loudly throughout the cells longer than necessary, "But it's a little late for that don't you think?" Electricity is sparking around my hand now, and I let it dance around my fingers. "And besides," I walk a little closer to him, plastering on the smirk I've seen a million times before, "that line only works once." That last whisper seems to put the last nail on his coffin and he stands there, looking at me with different eyes with a blank expression. I don't plan on killing him now, but why let him know that? Let's play a little while we're here.

Who's the monster now Mare? Who's the monster now?

"You're different."

"With no small part due to you."

We're face to face now, with ice cold bars separating us. His blue eyes are still blue as ever but there's a different quality to them, like they've lost their spark. They look drained, lifeless, but I guess that's what happens when you go throughout the things we have. I wonder what I looked like when I was in there. That memory only made me bitter. Forget what I thought a while ago about not wanting to be near him, I can handle it if it'll means he'll suffer; and believe me, I want him to suffer.

"Mare," he's even quieter than before, "please, I'm telling the truth." The lighting doesn't faze him, as though he's welcoming death.

"How can you expect me to believe you after all you've done?" my laugh comes out wry, "You of all people should know that I am not that helpless little girl you met way back when." The lightning turns even brighter with anger let him be scared for a moment, let him feel how I felt when the roles were reversed. "Only you are responsible for your actions, no one can make you do anything. You only do the things you choose to do." Electric sparks dance around my fingers in a display of light projecting off the dark walls.

"Mare, listen to me," his eyes wide. The blueness of them matches the ones in my dreams, which causes me to flinch. "My mother's been controlling me. I know how it sounds but," he looks down as though he's try to find the words, "You seen what she made Cal do, she capable of way worst things and believe me, she wasn't afraid to do it."

I turn to Cal, not knowing what to say. I was right he is a monster, a manipulator, trying to hit your weak spots. Everything he's saying now just proves how right I was about the kind of person he is. The only difference is he's lost his gift of telling those easy-to-believe lies. "Can you believe this? He thinks we're—"

"When?" Cal cuts me off, speaking for the first time since he's got in here. His eyes serious and unfazed, like he had already knew that this was coming.

I widen my eyes, he can't be serious. "Are you asking him to elaborate on his story? Do you actually believe him?" the disbelief in my voice is apparent. The lighting dies.

He ignores me and asks again, "When?" This time even stronger.

"You're not serious."

Maven disregards his question and looks to me again, "Mare, I know with everything that we've been through that... It's hard to believe," his grip's strong but his hand is shaking, "But I would never intentionally hurt you or your family. I hope—"

Cal steps in front of me, and asks again louder, "When?"

Maven turns to Cal as if it's the first time he had acknowledged him, and sighs, "My mother cornered Mare and I when we were walking back from Julien's, the day Evangeline scrapped her cheek with the spider," he nods at Cal to make sure he's following along, "After she threw Mare on the wall I grabbed her off, which I have never done before." He looks at me causing me to roll my eyes, Was that supposed to impress me?

"Get to the point," Cal growls.

Maven starts again, "She looked into my head, saw that I was a part of the Scarlet Guard, and used that to her advantage. She was never truly satisfied with simply being 'the wife', so she took the first chance she could to be king." He ends it with a scowl, one full of true despise for his mother.

Something doesn't make sense, it just doesn't add up. Elara may be many things but she isn't one to hurt Maven, even in her most vicious moments she loved him. He is not the victim, he is never the victim, I am the victim. "No," I say losing the courage I once had, "no."

"Mare..." he says my name for the millionth time today, and looks at me with those eyes, those same blue eyes that haunt my dreams.

"No mother would do that to her own child," I can't comprehend all the things that Elara is capable of, but hurting Maven is certainly not one of them. "She loved you."

"But she loved power more," there he goes again with those eyes, "at the end of the day all she loved was the trill of being in control, being able to lead people to their doom with just a mere thought," his eyes shifted in a way that reminds me of Cal, "she had so much ambition in her heart that it took up all the room to be able to love."

"Stop it," I say through gritted teeth, "stop trying to trick me," I can feel myself get soft but I won't let him in, I promised myself I wouldn't.

"I'm not—"
"It makes sense," Cal says in the background softly, usually the voice of reason, "the way the blood came out of his face, how there were certain times when you thought there was a change in personality when you looked at him…" The excuses are falling out of him by the second.

"You're crazy," I exasperate, "you're all crazy." I shake my head in disbelief. You have Cal who obviously still cannot let go of the fact that his brother is a compulsive liar and psychopath. Then you have Maven who's always has been good with words, which is exactly what he's doing today. Twisting the letters and sentences until they form to his advantage. He'll

do or say anything to get out of the hole he's dug for himself. It's only a matter of time before I turn crazy too. I start to around to leave turn around before Cal yells after me.

"The same thing happened with my mother!" he lets out a heavy sign I didn't know he was holding in.

He never talks about his mother.

"When she 'jumped' from the building," he hesitates for a moment, "on her body there was blood was trickling out of her face too, like Maven in the arena."

"A coincidence," I reply nonchalantly, although I know deeply it is not.

"It's a sign of head trauma. The pressure of another mind pressing down on the brain was too put for them to handle after long periods of time, so after it was gone, the brain somehow had to 'reboot' if you will," he made gestures with his hands to explain the concept, "to function on its own again before having the other mind do all of its work." he tried to make it less complicated it is, "That's why he collapsed at the exact moment Elara died, because it was the exact moment Elara's mind left his."

"I could've hit him in the head during the fight,"

Cal shakes his head, "I know it's hard to take in—"

"It should be," anger in building in my voice now, "but apparently you have thought about this before." This whole time he wasn't surprised, he even urged him to go on. He knew about this possibility and didn't tell me. He knew that there was a small chance that this could happen and didn't even bother to mention it. Instead he chose to keep me in the dark looking like an unreasonable, stubborn bitch.

"There was a chance that I was wrong, so I made the decision not to tell you in the case it would give you false hope."

Unbelievable.

"Mare, I did it to protect you."

"Well that didn't work now, did it?" I look over at Maven who has been unusually quiet, "You." The final betrayal provoked by Cal triggered the animalistic side of anger I've been trying so hard to keep in check. I lunge towards Maven until our noses almost touch, "I don't care what you say, I don't know how you did it but somehow you managed to trick Cal, but you're not tricking me,"

"Mare," Maven starts calmly but I don't let him finish.

"Why couldn't you just die? Why did you have to come back and ruin everything? You and your stupid lies that costed so many lives." This feels strangely more personal than ever, as if it weren't already was. There's something about that last statement that so true it hurts. It probably because in the chaos of the moments he had killed me too. Not me physically, but me internally. The Mare who still had hope, morality, was replaced her by this person filled with anger and revenge. He had killed the old Mare, and produced a new one who's not even remotely the same. But it seems as though this statement has hurt him too.

"I didn't kill anybody!" He lets go of the bars he's been clutching onto for dear life and throws his hands over his head while walking the perimeter of his cell before rushing back towards the front again, more frustrated than ever. "I don't know what I can do to convince you!" he kicks the bars causing them to shake and ring. His calmness and understanding is over, replaced with pure exacerbation.

"I want to Julien," I spin towards Cal, answering Maven, "Call for him, ask for him, I don't care, but get him here. Now."

Maven stiffens at the mention of him, his mouth scowling and eyebrows furrowed but doesn't disagree. He puts into face onto the bars looking at me straight in the eyes, "Fine, call him, but you will only hear what's already been heard.

Julien comes in with a trail of his yellow robes fluttering in behind him, eyes bright and expression strong. The scar that runs from his right cheek down to his lip is as bold as ever in this light, I don't know wether that's good or bad under the circumstances. He and Cal nod to each other in a way that shows that he already knows why he's here. He and Cal were in this together.

Looking past me, he makes his aim onto Maven, who's standing taller than ever. He's ready for this, he wants it, and doesn't waver the eye contact once Julien finds it.

Starting quickly, Julien's words liquify into a rich and resonant sound that's like music to any ear. Hopefully this goes as planned. "What is your name?"

Maven eyes go dull and his facial expression slumps into the hypnotized state I've seen before. "Maven Calore, Prince of Norta," slurs out of his mouth.

"What houses do you belong to?"

"House Calore and House Merandus"

"Who is your mother?"

"Queen Elara Merandus,"

"Has Elara been mind-controlling you?" The easy questions are over.

"Yes,"

I take in a breath.

"When did she start?"

"The day Mare's blood was almost revealed."

Another breath.

"Why?"

"She saw that I was in the Scarlet Guard and decided to use that to her advantage."

By this point I'm frozen with shock, he's been telling the truth.

"Did you want to kill your father?"

"No,"

Cal shifts.

"When did Elara stop controlling you?"

"When she was killed,"

I twitch with pain.

Julien breaks eye contact for just a brief moment to look at Cal, "You sure?"

To which Cal nods firmly, "I'm sure."

Before Maven has a chance to recoup his actions, Julien starts again, though slowly this time, with a pause of anticipation before he speaks again, "Do you love Mare?"

This catches me off guard and before I can put the thought through my head of what Cal had asked Julien to do, a small word hangs in the air:

"Yes."

I stagger back, not being able to breath. I don't know what's happened, I don't know what to do. I want to scream out that it must be mistaken, somehow he lied, somehow he tricked everyone and he's actually who I thought he was, but even I know now that that is not true. It's as though someone froze me and took away all my senses and left me hanging on a thread. My mind went blank and every plan planned, everything I had accomplished had been for naught. If anything it had been for the wrong reason, vengeance directed at the wrong person. The girl was here a couple of minutes ago has somehow vanished leaving another in its wake. A scared, helpless person that hasn't been let out for a number of years but suddenly came to reclaimed her empire. She's speechless, breathless, with tears creeping up from behind her eyes though she doesn't admit it.

Cal is handling better than me. At first he's speechless too, but then suddenly, as though every doubt he ever had had been erased and he can breath again. Then he laughs, then he crys, all of this in a matter of seconds. He quickly builds himself back up together, keeping his mind in check for its the most logical thing to do right now. I wouldn't know. He's somehow managed to mold himself back into that guy I've seen in the arena, the survivor, and it seems as though he can take anything life throws at him. Well lucky him. It's all too well, all the pieces of his secretive puzzle fits into place and everything had gone the way he planned it.

Where as I, feel like i'm being put underwater with Maven holding down my head. The boy I hated, the one I despised, the person that was the main source of all my nightmares, had been in a nightmare himself— perhaps even the worst one. I blamed him for everything, made him a scapegoat for all my problems, and now you're telling me that he was just another pawn in the game? That he is who you should feel sorry for? No there has to be some explanation, something. There's not. This doesn't end like this, it wasn't supposed to end like this. But alas, there's always that small percentage that things won't go as outlined, no matter how precise you made it. I can feel the surge of emotions ticking inside me, all waiting for the right moment to splurge out. Although there are millions of questions still unanswered, and thousands of words left unsaid I don't get the chance to for my legs have acted out before my brain. I dart for the door, wanting to leave the scene behind. I speed past the guard in front of the gates and out into the morning air. I want to get out of here as soon as possible. I need to. Maven is telling another one of his lies, his game of internal deception for he is the master of such an art. No, Julien and Cal will find out the truth soon enough, I don't know how, but he must he playing them both, it was all a trick to lure them in before he can crush them again. But not me, I know better. I had played this game before and failed, failed miserably. However, you're supposed to learn from your mistakes, for why play them in the first place? That's exactly what I'm doing now, learning.

I still have not fully fathomed what just happened but I don't care at this point. I just know I need to get out of here while I still can. While I still have a chance to save myself. My mind is running a bunch of excuses as to what I just saw in front of me, not knowing what to believe. It was most certainly all a lie, another manipulation tactic played out wonderfully by the ever so cunning Maven. But what my heart tells me and what my brain tells me are two different things, with only one being the correct response. Wether I'm running away from Maven or myself I do not know. But one thing I'm certain of is the fact that I don't want to be anywhere near Cal, who is not far behind me. He's fast, but I'm faster; I can and will use that to my advantage. I can hear him calling after me and one time he actually managed to graze my arm, which only caused me to sprint even faster. I lost him around the five minute mark when I turned a corner but even so I retain my speed. Why did I run you ask? Why didn't I stay to talk? Why didn't I have a mental breakdown or why I couldn't look Maven in the eyes? Because I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't cry in front of a murderer; and Maven is a murderer wether he wanted it or not.

Along with the air rushing against my face, I feel raindrops on my cheek. I don't care enough to brush it off and keep running, but then I feel it again. Suddenly its harder to breath, and the raindrops are coming down in streams. A storm is coming. It was cloudy this morning, I remember. It feels like ages ago, this morning, when I had decided to face my fears once and for all. Not once did I stop to determine if I were brave to do it. Obviously I was not. I just dove right in and took it head on, like an idiot. What a mistake that had been. My legs keep moving at a constant pace, deftly dodging whoever happens to get in my way. People jump away from me as I run past, quietly cussing as I whiz by. They must be wondering what or where I have to go that has me going so recklessly that puts them in the line of danger. Believe me I would like to know too. Rain keeps on falling and I'm so scatter minded that it takes me awhile to even comprehend that my clothes aren't wet. I look up to see clear blue skies and sunshine. Then where is this water coming from? Where is— oh. I wipe at my eyes and laugh; a laugh not meant for joy but for the utter stupidity of oneself. This is a feeling that hasn't been felt in a long time. These are tears that haven't been shed in ages. All of these feelings and emotions were locked up the moment I decided to lock my heart up. When I replaced love with reason, and traded in ethics for victory. For all the better reason too. Look at me here all weak. It's pitying. Stop Mare. Stop crying. My nose is stuffing up causing me to breath in through my mouth. What are you doing? What are you becoming? In response, my breath's become uneven and my vision is clouding. I wipe at the tears one my one before they have a chance to fall, eager to conceal my true emotions. But I'm not fooling anyone.

Once again we reached the never-ending internal struggle of my mind and heart, my sanity and insanity, the voice of reason and emotion. I didn't cry when my parents were killed. I didn't cry when Kilorn went missing. Neither did I cry when Bree was crippled. The voice of reason prevented that. I had already anticipated the worst. I knew the consequences and pain I was in for. I was ready. I was ready for the suffering and knew how prepare myself for the worst scenarios to come. I was strong. I knew how to keep my head in check and focus on the bigger picture. Why waste a minute of tears when you can spend that minute on something larger? On something that can be changed or manipulated. Maybe even accomplishable. What's done is done and all you can do at that point is deal with it and move on. I didn't let something as insignificant as feelings get in the way before. So why am I crying now? Why am I wasting this minute and many others?

Because nothing had prepared me for this. Not a single scene or scenario planned, for this was never part of the grand scheme of things. Hell, it wasn't even a possibility. This was never the worst case scenario, because, well, it was unimaginable. Take back Norta, destroy Maven, create equality and peace. That was the plan. But when the sanity within me fails, the insanity takes over, hence where I am now. Helpless, confused, and scared, but worst of all, regret. Had I chosen the right choices? Had I done the right thing or wrong? Did I make the logical choice or the one I thought was logical? These are questions that I cannot answer.

I feel my feet giving way but I keep at it, keep fighting. I'm not going to stop, I'm going to make it. I can't let a simple thing like running get the better of me. There are far worst things to fight for. My feet gradually gain speed. This is nothing. Nothing at all. You had worst. Far worst, I convince myself. But have I? For all the painful moments I've endured, I never cried like this. I never felt heartache like this, nor have I had the uttermost confusion that I am having right now. I let myself go this time. I'm too tired to fight anymore. I can't keep fooling myself that I would be okay, because I'm not. Anything I tell myself won't help me deal with what I am going through right now. I cautiously allow myself to let the tears fall freely and my sobs heavily; to let my breaths come erratically and my feet to slow down.

Enjoy it while you can, Mare. For that's twice now you've cried for Maven, and I vow, that it's never going to happen again.

Woah what a chapter amirite? I hope you guys can see why this took so long the way it did, but I didn't want to rush things and not have it come out the way I wanted it to. As to the new chapter names, each name is essentially the theme song to that chapter and relates to what the chapter is talking about / the 'vibes' it's giving off. So for example, "Locked Away" is the song for chapter four because of the what happened with Maven. If you listen to each song you will see why I chose it. Sorry for only starting to do this in the fourth chapter but hopefully you guys are ok with it. Big thanks for everyone who waited patiently and/or been here since the beginning! Once again I love all reviews so feel free to leave some below. :)