Hey guys! I am very sorry for the delay, but I have a lot of stress at work recently and still a writer`s block. So this is the new chapter, just some Sharon and Andy and a little bit about the case. The next chapters will focus more on the case, however. I would like to thank everyone who has reviewed, followed and favourited - it means a lot to me. :)
Chapter 4: Dark Angel
Sharon woke up with a smile on her face. She felt Andy's arm around her waist and his deep breaths in the crook of her neck. She lay in Andy's arms which was one of the best feelings ever. As he held her she felt secure and cared about and of course loved. All of this reminded her of the dream that she had yesterday. This time it was reality. But with the beautiful thoughts of yesterday morning also came the hurtful ones. The old wounds from the loss of her sister had been ripped open again, every memory carefully hidden in her heart even under all painful memories of her and Jack. When she squirmed in his arms to face him, Sharon saw Andy wide awake and looking at her lovingly. She felt slightly better as she looked into his chocolate brown eyes which she loved so much. He smiled at her.
"Good Morning, beautiful. How did you sleep?"
"Good Morning, Andy." Sharon said. "It was okay. I definitely got more sleep with you by my side." She smiled at him sadly. Andy's face lit up as he listened to her words.
"It sure was one of the best nights and sleeps I´ve ever had." Andy said with a mischievous smirk and Sharon's smile grew wider.
"Are you up for some breakfast, sweetheart? I could make something while you are getting ready. I assume I can't persuade to take today off."
"Your assumption is right. I have to get to the office and I have to know if Doctor Morales can confirm her… hmh… identity. And if the team found some background info on her." Sharon sighed. " I need to apologize to them. For just leaving without a word. And for freaking out. That was not professional at all." Sharon said, but Andy interrupted her.
"Hey, Sharon. I already told you yesterday. The team doesn't need an explanation. They understand. It's your family, Sharon. So it affects all of us and we can all relate." He gave her a reassuring smile. "Should I call Provenza and ask if they found something about her? Or if they have any leads?"
"Sure, that would be lovely. Thank you, Andy."
"Anything for you, my love," Andy said. He got up, but not before pressing his lips on hers for a light kiss. She returned it. She felt more relaxed with him around. Not that scared and worried. He shared a little bit of that burden with her. Just that she could open up to Andy, made her feel better already. Not good. No. She was far from that right now. Somebody hurt her by taking someone from her she hadn't even known. But the thought of her, Helen, Sharon reminded herself, down there, in the cold morgue, alone. Again. She was a kid, she reminded her of all of her three children like every kid did. Every case with a child was hard. But this one especially. Her sister´s daughter. Her baby sister´s little girl. The memories of Beatriz and all the hurt and misunderstanding between them, rising up again. Rear rushing through her body. The feeling of guilt and sadness. She felt a new lump building in her throat and her eyes burning up.
Andy felt her getting tense, so her just held her close and massaged her scalp, trying to relax her again. "Do you want to take a shower now or later?," Andy asked. Sharon let out a deep sigh.
"I'm going to take it now. Would you be so kind and make me some peppermint tea? I don't think coffee will ease my nerves. Ah, and could you make this phone call? I would really appreciate that." Andy pressed a kiss to her hair.
"Of course, Sharon. If you need me, just call for me. You know I'm here for you. I love you," He whispered in her ear. He wasn't sure if it was okay with Sharon if he said it to her again. But his self-consciousness and uncertainty vanished as she looked into his eyes and said with a steady voice. "I know, Andy. I love you too."
While Sharon was in the bathroom, getting ready for the day, Andy put on some new clothes he had brought with him in his duffle bag. As he left Sharon's bedroom a smile formed on his lips. Is that how it´s going to be from now on? When she is ready to take that step of moving in together. Oh god, I hope so. He was happy. Finally they were where he always wanted to be. With two children he is proud of and loves very much, even two grandchildren. And finally also with the love of his life. But at the same moment that thought pains him. Sharon had to go through so much pain. Jack. And of course her sister leaving and dying. And now this. He wished he could figure out a way to help her. But maybe the best way to help Sharon through this would be finding the one responsible for killing her and doing Helen justice. It would be hard to keep Sharon away from the case though. Even Rulebook herself could have some problems with keeping professional with this one, but god, he could definitely relate to that. Andy thought while preparing tea, some toast and fruit for Sharon. Sighing and inhaling deeply he prepared himself for the obviously hard and nerve-racking days ahead of them. His first priority was to keep Sharon calm and comfort her as well as he could. And secondly, he wanted this creep who did this to the girl and caused his lovingly Sharon pain in between, of the streets and locked up for the rest of his life.
He grabbed his cell phone from the counter and speed dialed Provenza. "Provenza," the Lieutenant on the other end of the line grunted.
"Good morning to you, too, old grumpy head."
"Well Flynn, unlike you, I didn't have a nice good overnight sleep at the Captain`s." Provenza said.
"Hey, don't you talk about her like that. And you don't have to wrack your brain about me spending time with Sharon. Better use it for something more useful."
"Well we could make out the orphanage she was placed into after her mother died. And we found out which school she went to. But we are still waiting on the end results of Morales's DNA-Test, but I would say it's pretty likely that it's her sister`s child. How is Sharon, anyway?"
"She is not feeling well. But that's hardly surprising. I think she still hopes it's just a mistake. But she knows, deep down she knows. And it pains her that she didn't even know about her. Another way to disappoint her dead sister in her eyes or something. We haven't talked much about it yesterday. So I don't really know a lot about it. Maybe Sharon is up to talk about it when we are in the murder room in an hour."
"Okay. We have some other things, but nothing major. And Sykes and Sanchez are tracking down people who knew her and could probably tell us something about her. At least I hope so. In our all and especially the Captain's interest. Tell her I'm sorry about her niece, will ya?"
"Whoa Provenza, do you really show sympathy for the Captain?" Andy asked with a smirk on his face.
"Shut it, Flynn. I'm just worried about the atmosphere in our division. And I don't want to get stuck with all the paperwork. That's your girlfriend's job." Provenza grumbled.
"Hey, shut up. Just admit that you like her and worry about her. That's no crime. Provenza?," Andy asked, but the Lieutenant had already finished the phone call.
"Asshole!," Andy said silently to himself.
"Are you talking about Provenza?," Sharon asked behind him. Andy turned around startled.
"God Sharon, you scared me. I didn't hear you coming in." Sharon looked at him apologetically. "Anyway, here is your tea and something for you to eat." He slid the plate with some fruit over to her. "Ah, and Provenza asked how you are doing. And well," Andy shuffled nervously with his feet. "He told me they made out the orphanage she lived in and the school she attended. But they are still waiting on Morales for the confirmation of her identity."
Sharon cleared her throat and Andy could see her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Thank you, Andy. I.. ah. Thanks for making breakfast but I'm really not hungry." She shoved the plate back to him, while grabbing her travel mug with the tea.
"Sharon please," Andy protested. "At least take it with you. You haven't eaten anything since breakfast last morning." Sharon just nodded her head and took a banana with some resentment.
"Okay. Are you ready?," Andy asked her interfering with her thoughts.
"Yeah. Thank you again, Andy. Really, I appreciate the effort and everything you are doing for me." Sharon said, sadly smiling at Andy.
"Sharon, honey. I would do anything for you. To help and support you. I just don't know exactly how. You need to tell me what to do." He said looking at her with sad puppy eyes. She almost had to laugh at his cuteness.
"I will tell you when I know how. I don't actually do right now, Andy. I have the feeling that things are out of control. Especially my emotions. And… well, I just, I.. I need you here with me. As I already said yesterday. You are helping me, Andy. Just with being you," She said with a smile as she placed her hands on his chest and played with his tie. She looked up into his eyes as he brushed a strand of hair out of her face and put it behind her ear. She couldn't possibly know how happy she made him with that comment. He smiled at her.
"Okay, let's go." He grabbed his own mug with one hand, draped his suit jacket over his shoulder and grabbed her hand, after Sharon got her bag and keys. She locked the door and grabbed Andy's hand again as they went to the elevator to get to the parking lot. They held hands during the ride over to the PAB building. Occasionally Andy glanced at Sharon while she looked out of her window to make sure she was alright. He felt her unease more and more as they came closer to the LAPD. He squeezed her hand to assure her that everything would be fine.
As they arrived at the murder room, Sharon first went to her office to place her bag on her desk. But she immediately returned to the team and looked at them expectantly.
"Well, good morning to you too, Captain," Provenza said sarcastically. Sharon snapped out of her work mode for a moment.
"Oh, I'm sorry Lieutenant," she said apologetically. "Good morning, everyone. I also want to apologize for my behavior yesterday. My reaction was very unprofessional. Thank you, Louie, for supervising and you all for staying here and obviously taking a night shift. That was really not your job and you did it anyway. So… thank you very much." She looked around at her team and took the time to thank everyone personally.
"No Problem, Sharon." Lieutenant Tao spoke first. "We all can relate and understand. We all have family. And you are family, too. So if solving this case is the help we can provide, we do it. I am sorry about your sister, Captain." Sharon could only nod and gave him a sad but thankful smile as her eyes started to fill with tears.
Amy was next as she stepped forward and embraced Sharon in a hug. "I'm so very sorry, Captain. Just tell us if you need anything." Detective Sykes let go of her and stepped away. "Thank you, Amy. Thanks, to all of you."
"Ma`am," was everything Buzz could say as he nodded his head in her direction.
Lieutenant Provenza was next in line. "Yeah, also from me Captain. I mean Sharon. My condolences. Also from Patrice."
"I really appreciate it, Louie," Sharon said.
Julio didn't say anything at all. He probably understood and sympathized best with the pain Sharon was going through. Under the surprised looks of everyone he slung his arms around the petite Captain and held her tight. It surprised her quite the same way as when she had welcomed him back at work with a hug after his gunshot wound.
After they had all expressed their sympathies with their Captain, Provenza demanded to bring Andy and Sharon up to date.
Sharon was thankful to him for keeping the case and work in mind and not to get swallowed by the emotions like she was. At least one of them had his head back in the business. "Flynn, has probably already told you that the result of the DNA-Test haven't come back yet. But Morales said, it's just a formality and that he is sure that this is Beatriz's daughter. Captain if I may." Sharon looked at him immediately because it was uncommon for him to be so polite. Provenza continued. "Maybe, you haven't found out about her in your searches on your sister's case, because she has got a different family name than her. Her full name is Helen Lacey. She was first placed in the Sacramento Crisis Nursery in the Capital of California. At the age of nine she was relocated into Maryvale in Los Angeles, who provides intensive mental health services and care for girls, ages 8 to 17. Mostly traumatized by physical, emotional or sexual abuse. Tao is in contact with the head of the orphanage to get some background information on her."
"Sir." Detective Sykes interrupted. "I'm sorry, but Morales just called with the end results from the DNA-test from the lap and they confirmed her identity." Provenza nodded.
"Thank you, Sykes." He turned to the Captain. "I am very sorry, Captain." Sharon struggled with keeping her feelings at bay and to not burst into tears. The others sensed her unease and sadness. Andy had an inner struggle with himself. He wanted to take his Sharon into his arms, to hold her tight and comfort her as well as he could. But he knew she wouldn't approve. Even in this kind of situation. She had already let her guard down in front of her team too much for her likeness. He could only squeeze her shoulder even tighter, his heart ached for her as he saw the hurt reflected in her green eyes. She looked so fragile and so not like her usual self in Captain mode.
Provenza was the first to speak again. "Sykes and Sanchez are on to find some friends and other people who knew her well. Meanwhile I would suggest you tell us your sister's story, if you don't mind." Provenza tried to encourage her with one of his rare smiles.
"Just take your time, Sharon. Wait until you're ready." Andy said as he gave her shoulder another comforting squeeze. Sharon swallowed before she began to talk in an unsteady voice.
"Well, where do I start with this one? I don't even know if I can help you and provide enough information. I haven't seen her for so long, even before she died… Okay. You all know that Beatriz is my sister. She was several years younger than me, but we had a very good relationship with one another. When I was 20 I went away for college and then the police academy. It broke my heart to leave my family for that, especially my little sister." Sharon breathed in deeply. "But I actually wanted to do something with my life and law school just always had been my dream. But we stood in regular contact, mostly over the phone; she had also been visiting for several times. And I came home as often as I could. When my ex-husband came into my life, the calls and visits at home weren't as frequent anymore, I have to admit. But I lived my own life then and so did they." While the Captain spoke she mostly looked at her fingers as they were the most interesting thing and avoided looking at anyone from her team, especially Andy. She had the feeling that if she looked into his eyes she would break. She continued with a faltering voice. "When Jack Raydor and I got married, Beatriz's and my relationship grew tenser. She didn't approve of him while I couldn't understand her reasons. She also made him responsible for me giving up my dreams to work as a laywer. Turns out she had a better feeling and knowledge of him than I did. Then I was pregnant with my daughter and we got on very well again, for some time. She adored her, I named Emily after my sister." A light smile graced her lips. "But she didn't visit me often enough, still because of my ex-husband. At the age of 18 she ran away from home. I was shocked. I had no idea that their relationship was that bad. I knew they had some trouble with each other. She was so different from me, my parents loved her but had some struggles with educating her. She was always the one getting in trouble and everything had to be about fun and entertainment. I knew they worried about her a lot. And one day I got a call from the police that my sister was missing. My parents hadn't even called me themselves, what had me even more worried. I couldn't understand why they would keep something like that from me. I called them immediately and their dismissive behavior bothered me immensely. I've never found out what really happened. The reason why she ran away. Why my parents haven't contacted me immediately. After that incident my relationship with my parents got worse." Sharon paused. "You know," she turned into a more serious mode, she was almost her true self again. "We have to contact them, ask them, I want to know why! If the knew about her daughter, why they hadn't contacted me. Just…," she started to stammer again.
"Yeah Captain. That's a good idea. Do you want to make that call yourself or should one of us do that?" Lieutenant Tao asked.
"I assume this would be my call to make, Lieutenant. Thank you. I will do that in a minute, after I have finished telling you Bea's and my story." Everybody looked at her expectantly.
"Well, ehm… the only thing to add would be, that I have tried to find her so desperately. The police hadn't found anything, either. I had the odd feeling that my parents weren't really interested in finding her at all. And she ran away at the age of eighteen. Legally my hands were bound. After three yours of looking for her I finally got a call from the police department in San Diego, apparently she got in trouble with the law. Of course I went down to San Diego immediately to support her. I was so eager to meet her again after all this time. But when I arrived she was already gone. The officers told me her bail had already been paid for. They couldn't tell me her address nor had any contact number. The only thing I found out was that she was convicted because of drug possession. So apparently she didn't want to see me or get found. So I was back at point zero again. Just that after this incident I didn't try to find her so eagerly anymore." Sharon swallowed hard.
"So after that, I just waited. But I've never heard from her again until this phone call in the middle of the night from a police station, this time in Chicago. Obviously she had moved around a lot. And well, you know the rest of the story; why they had called me. I flew down there, after leaving my children with my neighbor. I was in shock and heartbroken, I hadn't even fully realized what had happened just yet. But I had to arrange the funeral and everything around it as good as possible. Simultaneously I tried to find out what had really happened. My parents had already arrived before me and helped me as much as possible. We got a long quite well. The information on this case was very rare, as you may have already seen. Yeah, well, all I know is what you have seen in that file. Her boyfriend was the murder and had killed her in the heat of passion, as he stated. She had just turned 24. He was intoxicated when they had fought. A neighbor had called the police about the fighting and loud shouting, which he later gave to protocol. When the officers arrived it had already been too late. They only found her lifeless body. The boyfriend offered no resistance He was shocked of what he had done and was remorseful, to what I have read. That didn't bring her back though. He was convicted for twelve years. After the funeral, which took place back here in LA, Gavin and my parents convinced me to let it go. Let the case go. And to let her go, especially. And to not try and find reasons why everything had happened as it did. I felt guilty for not trying harder to find her, for letting her down."
Sharon Raydor finally looked up from her hands and she blushed as she saw the sympathetically looks the members of her team gave her. Even Provenza looked like he was actually upset about her story. She blushed slightly as an uncomfortable and uneasy feeling rose in her. She just had opened her heart to her team and had let them see her most inner emotions and most private and important story. But as she looked into Andy's eyes she also saw reassurance next to the look of sadness and love. He nodded his head in her direction. It was okay to break. This was her family.
-Tbc-
Thank you so much for reading. I truly don't know how to proceed with this story. So it will take me some time to update. I am so sorry. I Hope yo enjoyed reading it and I would be very happy about reviews. I wish you a nice and happy Shandy Sunday. At least here it already is Sunday. ;)