'Ok' I said 'can you turn off the TV?' I asked him. Kurt reached over and grabbed the remote, turning off the TV.
'So, four years ago when we moved into this place from an even smaller apartment on the other side of town…' I began while gazing into Kurt's beautiful eyes, finally devoid of anger and fear but filled with longing for his memories.
'…You hated the colours on the walls throughout the whole apartment and begged me to buy us some paint so we could change it. When we got to the paint store you "realized" you also hated the carpet and also the furniture you picked out a year ago. I tried to resist and just buy the paint but you gave me your puppy-dog eyes look and I melted into your arms.
'So then we drove downtown to a great carpet store where you picked out this sickly-green colour that I hated so I made you tone it down to this shade' I said while gesturing at the carpet underfoot. 'We then took home the paint and covered up our old furniture and painted the whole apartment. About when we were halfway done you stopped and kissed me because you said and I quote "you look so damn sexy in overalls Blaine Anderson. Did you notice you have white paint on the tip of your nose?" I just laughed and pulled you into a kiss. We continued painting when the doorbell rang and I went to answer it. It was the carpet people, they had a cancelation and came three days earlier because we lived the closest to them.
'It was a disaster, the carpet people had to move out all the old furniture, clogging up to hallway outside and they had to put down fresh carpet while the walls were wet with paint.
'It took about six hours. But we left for the professionals to do it. We went to a movie still in our paint-covered overalls, you threating to hurt me if people saw you looking like a bum, covered in paint. When the movie finally ended we went home to find the furniture pushed up against wet paint, the carpet guys finished earlier then they guessed. We had to clean the old furniture before we sold them.' I finished looking up at Kurt who was looking at me in wonder, his beautiful blue eyes were clouded over with the memory I implanted into his mind, I could tell that he was desperately trying to remember his anger and frustration at the carpet guys but I knew he couldn't, this was just a story to him now, no longer a memory.
I stood up, trying not to look at Kurt, trying not to cry at the man I lost but didn't lose.
'Are you OK?' he asked me when I stood up.
'Fine' I mumbled 'I just got to go to the bathroom' I said lamely and walked out of the living room and into our bedroom where again I collapsed onto our bed, breathing in the scent that Kurt used to have.
'Blaine?' a soft voice asked from the doorway
'Oh, hi Kurt' I said while trying to hide the fact that I was balling my eyes out
'Why did you lie to me?' he asked as he slowly walked into the bedroom, looking at my nightstand, seeing another picture of us cuddling up to the camera, looking so happy and in love.
'I did not want you to see me crying for you' I said truly.
'Why?' Kurt asked sweetly as he stood looking at me
'Because you need my help and not my sympathy' I said staring at his foot, unable to look at my love in the eye.
'Blaine, I also need sympathy so I know he really cares about me, the people who give me more sympathy care about me. While you ball your eyes out every time you are alone, so I can tell you really care about me' Kurt said while sitting on our bed next to me.
I missed the weight Kurt put onto the bed, evening out the slope that was caused by my weight, it felt comfortable, it felt like home.
'Blaine' Kurt said softly 'I don't remember you and I might never remember you. But I would at least like to create new memories with you, if you would let me. I would also like more stories from you from now on' he said smiling at me sweetly.
'Deal' I said while looking at my baby again.
The next day I woke up at the painfully empty bed, knowing that the man that is supposed to share it with me was fast asleep in the living room, not wanting to spend the night in a bed with a stranger. I quickly brushed back the tears that formed in my eyes. I got up slowly, not looking at the happy couple that was in the picture on my nightstand, it was still too painful to think about just over a week ago.
It had only been a week. I thought miserably. It had been only a week and I missed Kurt so much that it felt like he had been gone for over four years. I walked over to the closet, still full of Kurt's designer outfits and my regular outfits, though I got rid of the bow-ties that I wore to school for some random reason I could not remember.
I pulled out my cell phone after I dressed and looked to see if I had any messages. 24!
The first one was from my publisher informing me I had a meeting in a weeks' time, I quickly texted back saying I could not make it because Kurt was sick.
I looked at the next one and stopped, I had not heard from Santana for over a year. She and Brittany lived just an hour from New York but we never saw them.
The text was short and very un-Santana like wishing Kurt luck and giving us both sympathy. The other 22 messages were from their former and current friends from New Directions and from other friends they made in New York. They all basically said the same thing. Wishing me and Kurt luck and giving us their sorrows.
I turned off my phone and walked down the hallway and opened the living room door quietly.
I poked my head through to see my Kurt sprawled over the couch, his breathing making his chest rise and fall gently; he looked so sexy it took all my willpower to make my way to the kitchen and not get side-tracked by the god sleeping on our couch.
I started to cook up waffles, Kurt's favourite breakfast when the man himself walked into the room wearing nothing but a white singlet that clung to his body, outlying his muscles and a pair of boxer shorts.
God Kurt had changed since the crash, his porcelain skin his the faint scars that were still etched there from the crash and his mannerisms had changed drastically from eating in the lounge to walking around the house in his underwear.
'Morning' I said while avoiding the man as he walked over to the sink behind me
'Morning' he said brightly as he pulled out a glass and filled it up with water from the tap. He drank deeply while watching me cook.
'What are you making?' he asked me while I put the mixture into our waffle iron.
'I am making you your favourite breakfast' I said.
'Well, what is it because I don't exactly know my favourite foods' Kurt said as he watched me cook his breakfast.
"Well these are waffles; you like to eat them with cream on special occasions and with jam on normal occasions. Sometime you like to dip them into your coffee which I find horrible but you seem to like it.' I said while pulling out the first waffle and placing it on the plate sitting next to the iron.
'Well it smells good' Kurt said sweetly as he started to walk back into the lounge.
'Oh, Blaine where are my clothes?' he asked innocently.
'Oh they are in the closet in the bedroom, your clothes are on the left and mine are on the right, you separated them by a curtain so you should tell which is which.' I said smiling remembering that day like it was yesterday.
'Well you will have to tell me that story some time' he said as he left to get changed.
I smiled to myself as I went to the fridge to get out the whipped cream to have with the waffles; I also took out some raspberries and put them in a bowl.
Kurt came back just as I pulled out the last waffle, he smiled when he saw the cream and raspberries 'I thought that cream was for special occasions' Kurt said as he walked into the room. For someone with no memory of his past life, Kurt still dressed like Kurt.
'Well this is a special day' I said while splitting up the waffles evenly between the two of us.
'Why?' Kurt asked as he poured whipped cream onto his and then smothering them with the berries.
'Well you are going to hear some stories then we are going to visit your step-brother and sister-in-law and niece I said while popping a handful of berries into my mouth, chewing softly taking in the delicious juice that the berries gave off.
"Oh' Kurt said simply, I knew he was trying to remember them but he couldn't.
'Would you like me to show you some pictures of them before I tell you the story of when and why you put up the curtain?' I asked as I pulled another handful of raspberries and plopped them in my mouth.
'Sure' Kurt said simply while staring at his empty plate that took a surprisingly short time for him to finish.
'Ok then, follow me' I said while pulling the man out of the room and to the living room.
I walked over to an enormous bookshelf and pulled out a photo album, not the one I was looking at the night of the crash but one with pictures of family and friends. I flipped it open until I found the picture of the Hudson-Berry's.
'Here' I said giving the picture to Kurt.
'The man is your brother, Finn. The woman is your sister-in-law and best friend Rachel and the little girl is your niece Lucy' I said pointing them out.
'What are their last names?' he asked me looking at the picture of some of his family
'The Hudson-Berry family' I said smiling. 'Rachel and Finn are only children so is Lucy but I don't think for long' I said smiling. 'Also Kurt you have a brother-in-law as well as another sister-in-law' I said thinking of Cooper and his new wife Amanda, the got married the previous year, finally I did something that big before Cooper I thought bitterly.
'You have a brother?' Kurt asked me while still looking at his.
'Yes' I said, wishing I had a good relationship like Kurt and Finn with Cooper.
'Have I met him?' Kurt asked while finally looking at me.
'Yeah you did in your senior year at high school.' I said 'he also came to our wedding' I said softly, not looking Kurt in the eye.
'Oh' was all he said 'Where are our wedding photos?' he asked 'I have seen lots of pictures of us as a couple but none of our wedding' he said looking around the room at the same time.
'You put them all into a scrapbook so that they would not get destroyed, but I made one for myself and keep it in my wallet' I said while pulling out my wallet and showing Kurt the picture of us wearing white suits and kissing our first kiss as a married couple. Kurt pushed the picture back.
'Blaine, I believe that we are or were a couple but I do not want to see me kissing you when I have no feelings for you' he said.
That stung. I felt my heart shatter again; fresh tears welled up in my eyes as I finally found out that the man I loved has got no feelings for me anymore.
'Blaine I am sorry, I is just I don't feel anything for you, yet' he said.
That one little word gave me some small hope.
'Come on' I said standing up 'let's go and meet your brother and his family' I said while offering my hand to my love. He took it and squeezed it. I love him so much I thought and without knowing at the time Kurt felt a spiral of butterfly's in his stomach.