CHAPTER FOUR
"You can't be serious." Jessica walked around the table to stand by my father's place. "This is something that you cooked up and dragged Edward in on to get back at me."
I made a move to respond but I was intimidated to do so. Instead, I slowly shook my head.
"I assure you that I am absolutely serious. As I was explaining to your father, I recently came home and realized when I saw your sister again for the first time, my feelings came quickly flooding back to me. I would love nothing more than to marry her and begin our life together."
Edward sat down slowly pulling his chair closer to mine. He took my hand in his and Jessica's eyes narrowed.
"Mr. Swan, do I have your permission to court your daughter?" Once again Edward asked looking to my father and doing his best to ignore my sister's presence.
My father's mouth moved to answer but Jessica stepped forward.
"No, you don't. As the head of this family, I say who Bella can date and marry," Jessica declared.
Jessica was right. It was within her power to put an end to this and she would never allow this union knowing that it would place me above her. I sighed and began to pull back from Edward, but he wouldn't give in. He kept his hand firm and gave Jessica a smile with a wicked gleam in his eye. The very same look I had seen on his twin sister's face earlier that day.
"I am not here to seek your approval. I could care less about what you agree to or not. Charles Swan is the person I respect when it comes to matters of his daughter's heart and happiness. Isabella has told me all about you, Jessica and I would never allow someone so petty and vile to plague our existence for even one more minute. Now, shoo! Or I will call your husband and explain how our family will have nothing more to do with the Newtons and all of society will know to shun your kind. Do you really want to challenge me?"
Like with Esme, Jessica wanted to say many things but refrained out of respect for the natural order. Her face was red, and it wasn't from the high temperatures our house held during those summer months.
Jessica slowly shook her head, so her words won't betray her, but her eyes are lethal and trained on me. I refuse to look up into them believing at that moment she has all the power to incinerate me from the inside.
"Good. Now that we have that sorted out. Isabella explained that you are here to see to a proper marriage and since I am providing that with my good name, you don't need to be here anymore. I'm sure your husband would welcome your early return. Once I have your father's approval for courtship, I will see to Isabella's care. You need not worry about your sister for one more second."
I feel giddy at the thought of Jessica's early return upstate. Could it be possible that she will be out of my hair until the Christmas month? I squeeze Edward's hand and nearly tear up at the thought.
Jessica has been dismissed by not one but two Cullen's on the same day. One being in her own home which is quite impressive. Trembling, I imagine from anger, Jessica walks towards the staircase and slowly retreats up to her room. When she is out of earshot, Edward turns back to my father.
"Are you sure this is what you want, son?" my father asked. Not to be mean but because he too knew of the uphill battle we both faced.
"There is nothing I could ever want more," Edward replied.
My mother reaches over to take my father's hand. I am amazed that she has managed to stay silent this whole time but then again, she is only one step over me, so she would have no say in these matters.
My father nods his head and gives Edward a genuine smile.
"Thank you, sir. You make our family exceptionally honored and happy with your declared intentions."
My mother is smiling and nearly crying herself as she nods along with my father's blessing.
"No, thank you."
Edward stands up bringing me with him.
"Now, if you wouldn't mind. Do you think it would be alright if your daughter accompanied me home? I will have the car bring her right back."
"Of course. Yes. Yes," my father laughs standing up to see us out.
There is already a chauffeured car awaiting us as we exit the house. Edward never breaks character for even a second. His hand is in mine and he patiently walked me down the three steps and allows for me to enter the car first. My mother and father stand on the porch to see us off. I don't believe they have ever been happier and that's saying something. You should have seen their faces the day Michael Newton's father began negotiations for my sister's hand.
I just made my parents proud. My ruse of courtship and impending marriage proposal was the first time my parents were proud of me. I should feel honored but there is a stab to my heart that this is what it takes to have their respect.
"What's wrong? I thought that went very well. They believed every second of it and I managed to get your sister out of our lives which I thought would have made you happy."
I nod and look over to him.
"I am happy. I just…you could never understand," I whispered looking back out my window.
"Try me."
"Don't worry about it, Edward. We are going to be fake married. You don't need to worry about making me fake happy."
I hear him scoff. I have offended him with my words. I hate myself for it since he has done me a kindness this eve.
"Bella, you may be my fake wife, but I am still your real friend. Just because our marriage will be faked doesn't mean I don't care for your happiness."
I turned to him. I owed him honesty after everything he had done for me and will continue to do for me.
"I know I should be happy. I have never seen my parents prouder in their life. But, it hurts that the only way I could ever bring honor to my family is by a fake marriage. By marriage at all. Why couldn't I be born in a world where I could make a difference in someone's life by my own acts and not by a man who chooses me? I hate this world. I hate…how everything works here. I just wish…"
"Okay," Edward said. "I get it. But, the world isn't changing anytime soon so we make the best of it and find ways around the rules. But, for this fake marriage to work, we both have to agree to be open and honest. We must nearly make it a real marriage by the respect we agree to show one another. Like I said to your family this evening, it is now up to me to take care of you. If there is anything you need or require. Please just ask. I can't read your mind even if I have come to read your face fairly well. Tomorrow I want you to come over, so we can officially introduce our courtship to my parents."
"Shouldn't we tell Alice first? She will make a scene if we tell her in front of your parents."
"I will figure out Alice. Leave her to me. Go home and get some rest. Your parents will be cake compared to mine."
The car pulled up to the front of Edward's intimidating mansion. I am feeling daunted by his latest words. He is right. His parents will be much harder to charm.
"Thank you," I rush to say. "Really. Even if this whole thing goes south tomorrow. Seeing Jessica's face has made it worthwhile."
Edward's hand paused on the door handle. He turned back to me and brought his hand to my face. He pulled me into another kiss. Once again, I freeze and overthink the way his lips move against mine. He doesn't stop this time, however. Instead, he brings his other hand up and makes sure that my face has nowhere to go. He pushes more aggressively, and I feel my body and mind give in. I melt into him and even allow my mouth to open a little which Edward takes the opportunity to push his tongue in my mouth. My mind begins to assess whether I like the feeling of his hot wet spongy tongue. I quickly throw out my thoughts and actively participate in the kiss. I feel body tingle in anticipation for something it will never have. We may kiss and hold hands, but I will never have sex with Edward Cullen.
"There you are," Edward says when he breaks our kiss and pulls back. "That was very good. I told you that we could make this believable."
He lets go of my face and moves to get out of the car. I sit back in my seat and try and refrain from fanning myself. Suddenly the air-conditioning in his fine Town Car doesn't do anything for my current flushed face.
"Good night, Bella. I will text you about our plans tomorrow and send a car."
I nod absently, and he closes the door. I feel as if I had just been knocked into by a battling ram. The car pulls out and begins to its drive to take me back home. I am thinking about that kiss far too much. I should be focused on surviving the night. What if my sister comes at me with a knife while I sleep. I wouldn't put it past her.
My parents await me when I return. It seems as if Jessica is back downstairs and threatening them when I walk in.
"You better fix this or I will make sure that my husband doesn't send any more coins your way. You can't honestly believe that a Cullen would ever want anything to do with Bella. Even if Edward is stupid enough to fall for some trick Bella is turning. His parents will never allow for this."
I step out from the entryway and let my arrival be known. My father looks torn. His once happy face is questioning Jessica's words. Her argument is sound. He too wonders why a Cullen would ever want someone like me.
Jessica sees my father's eyes go to me and she turns around to face me.
"What did you do to him? Did you blackmail him? Threaten him? What!" she snapped.
I didn't know what to say. Edward wishes me to spin this web of lies about long-lost love from our childish past. I should say the lines that Edward wanted me to but at that moment, something boiled in my blood. I was tired of always being the good little fat girl.
"Threatening our parents? Really Jessica? I must threaten you greatly for you to treat our mother and father with such disrespect. You feel it, don't you? You're losing your hold on this family. Any common decent person would never treat their family how you have. We are nothing more than silly little pawns in your chess game. Worth nothing. Worth sacrificing to see to your rise."
I walked forward slowly stalking her.
"Move out of the way, Jessica. Because Edward Cullen and I are coming. Take your Newton money and get out. We don't need you anymore. My marriage will provide far more than yours ever could. Move out of the way. This fat cow takes great steps and if you don't relent, I will love nothing more than to stomp on you on my way to victory!"
I turn around and walk out of the room. I am ten feet tall. The big threat in my life is over. I enter my bedroom and close the door behind me. I stand tall and then…it hits. What the hell did I just do? God, I am a moron. I didn't secure anything. This whole plan could fall through any minute and then where would my family be if Jessica makes good on her threat to cut off my parents.
I feel myself hyperventilating. How can I fix this? Go back downstairs and tell Jessica that I made a lapse in judgment and will do whatever she wished. Let my parents deny me so they can stay in this house? My body is trembling. I have nothing. This is what happens when you let your emotions take over.
My phone vibrates. I see the number is not recognized.
I told my parents I have pressing news to share with them and require their full attention. How does two work?
It's Edward. He must have asked Alice for my number.
My hands are shaking as I hold the phone. I begin typing back to him. Short and simple, Bella. Keep it short and simple.
Can't do this. Sorry.
I throw down the phone as if it would catch on fire any second and pull off my shoes. I try and find a perfect groveling apology that Jessica would accept. Something along the lines of, deny me but don't deny my parents.
My phone lights up. Vibrating. The number that just texted me is now calling. I don't want to pick it up because I know Edward will just talk me back into this stupid silly plan. So, I watch as the call is sent to voicemail. I breathe a sigh of relief. Maybe he has gotten the message loud and clear.
Coming over
My eyes widen, and I jump on top of my phone trying to find the callback button. I hit redial and get up, pacing around my dark room only lit by the small lamp on the side table.
"Bella?"
"What?" I snapped irritated that he is forcing me to call him.
"What happened?"
I don't reply. I sit back down on the bed and run my hand through my hair nervously.
"Remember. Open and honest," he recited.
I sighed.
"I just can't do this. My family is going to lose everything. You don't understand. You have nothing to lose…well…other than respect once you publicly announce your intentions. However, most people will think you just lost your mind and be sent to the white ward or perhaps you're just a drunk. Have a drug problem…"
"Bella!" Edward snapped stopping me from my rant. "You won't lose. I promise. What happened to make you say this? Did your sister say something to you? Threaten you?"
I don't want to reply because I know he will hear any lie in my voice.
"Tell me and don't you dare lie to me. You know I can tell when you lie, right?"
How does he know me so well? He hasn't even been around for six years. Longer if you count when he stopped talking to me.
"I can't take this risk."
"Tell me what she said."
He knows. He knows, and he will never shut up until I tell him.
"Its…not so much what she said. More what I might have said."
Pause.
"Okay, what did you say?"
I swallowed.
"You're going to be mad," I said cringing.
"I'm already mad because you won't give me a straight answer."
I am wiggling all over the bed. I don't want to say it, but I know I must.
"I just…went off. I told her that my marriage to you will mean that she will have no hold over this family and that…you and I…we were coming for her. I may have threatened her a little and told her to get out of my way or I will stomp all over her."
Oh god! Just saying it out loud again made it all the worse.
I could hear Edward begin to laugh on the other side of the phone.
"It's not funny! Do you have any idea what I have just done? I am so stupid. Why would I do that? We haven't even told your parents yet. They will most likely put an end to this madness come tomorrow and then she will make good on every one of her threats and cut my family off. My father may lose his job. My mother…"
"Wait!" He barked stopping his laughter. "She threatened your family?"
"Of course, she did. If this marriage goes through, she will lose all her power over us. She would never allow that to happen. She could be plotting my death as we speak."
Another pause.
"I'll call you back," Edward said and then promptly hung up the phone.
What just happened?
I turned and flopped back on my bed as I waited. But, time felt like it was moving much slower than ever before. It must have been a solid ten minutes until my bedroom door opened with a crushing bang into the wall.
"You bitch! You fat bitch!"
I jumped out of bed with my phone in my hand taking a defensive pose as my sister began screaming at me.
"You think you can call your boyfriend up and get him to have me removed! I will end you!"
She began advancing on me. My phone began vibrating in my hand. I held it up.
"Come one step closer and I press this button and let my…boyfriend hear your crazy butt!"
My threat works, and she stops in place looking at my phone.
I slide to begin the call.
"Hello?"
"Bella, its all taken care of. There should be a car on its way to pick up Jessica. Should I send the authorities over?"
I swallow and look at Jessica.
"Should he send someone to escort you off our property or are you going to leave with some dignity?" I asked.
She didn't respond. She turned on her heel and grabbed the door handle to slam the door behind her.
"Is she gone?" Edward asked.
"Uh huh. What did you do, Edward?" I asked quietly.
"I called Newton senior and told him that his daughter in law was getting in the way of our impending union. That she threatened you and that we don't take kindly to those that would threaten our happiness. That I wanted Jessica out of your house tonight because you no longer felt safe and I couldn't very well have my intended feel unsafe."
"Oh god, Edward. What did you do?" I smacked my hand to my face and slide down the wall to land with a thud on the floor. "We haven't even received your parent's blessing. After tomorrow, she could be…"
"After tomorrow when we receive my parent's blessing, you will hopefully drop this and stop being so scared. This is ridiculous, Bella. Do you really have so little self-respect that you would give in to your atrocious sister instead of taking what I am offering? You were ready to call the whole thing off because of your fear of her. It is time you begin your studies starting with the prominent families and then, maybe, you will understand just where the Cullen's are. No one will threaten us and get away with it. Good night. I will see you tomorrow at two."
He hung up the phone and I sat and festered in my spot after being thoroughly reprimanded. I hated some of his words. My studies. College wasn't in the cards for someone like me, but you better believe it was expected of me to study up on our society's rules and customs. I could embarrass my future husband if I didn't perform up to the proper expectations and standards. Everything from properly introducing a person to where we all stacked up on the food chain. I didn't need a lesson to know where his family was placed. I wasn't stupid, but Edward made me feel that way with his words.
Picking myself back up I went and sat next to the window to look out at the moon and really go over everything that had transpired. Around and around I went. Was this a good idea? Going through with this plan.
A car drives up our path. It is not the fancy Rolls Royce that Jessica insisted she have while she was here. It was just a plain Town Car. Nothing special. I see Jessica walk down the three steps to the car while her valet runs to pack up her cases into the trunk. Jessica turns to look back at the house one last time. I nearly duck out of sight but my whole body is frozen in place. A small victory that she was leaving. She stares up at me. Our eyes lock, and I see hers narrow. This is not the last I would hear from my sister. Somehow retribution would be paid. When? Where? The thought fills me with dread.
She flips around. Her long light brown hair perfectly following behind her. Even in this humidity, she manages it not to frizz. The minute the Town Car is no longer in sight, I feel a small breath of relief.
The next morning, I feel as if I am in a dream when I walk downstairs, and my mother greets me at the bottom of the steps. She has a smile on her face and looks…happy? It was hard to explain because my mother rarely looked happy to see me.
"Good night sleep?"
I nodded. My face probably filled with confusion.
"I asked Shelly to make your favorites for breakfast. She had to make a quick trip to the store since she recently made the mistake of throwing out quite a bit of good food."
"She didn't make a mistake. Jessica made her get rid of everything fattening," I explained.
I wasn't about to let Mrs. Cope take the blame for my sister's actions. My mother knew it was Jessica's doing but how quickly she had forgotten what it was like to be apart of the working class. It was common to place blame on the help.
"Why don't you come and sit down," she replied choosing to ignore my indignant comment.
My father was at the table and sitting in front of his place was a large stack of Berrycakes. My breakfast favorite. Berries baked into the pancake. A cup of sweet cream whipped butter in the center. I might have thought it was my birthday already if I didn't know what was up with this timely breakfast.
"So…has Edward called this morning?"
He hadn't but I knew my role to play.
"Just to wish me a happy morning and to tell me that he awaits my arrival, so we can sit down with his parents this afternoon."
My mother swells with pride.
"Would you like me to accompany you?"
As I said before, commonplace to have a member of my family to come and speak on my behalf till I was turned over to a man to speak for me.
"That's not necessary. Edward said that it will be informal. Once his parents know his intentions then you may begin negotiations."
That is how it worked. Courtship until both parties' parents finalized negotiations. Negotiations, when the bride's family would lay out their expectations for the groom's family. Everything from financial gain to property to expected trusts set up for future heirs. Wedding costs. Even down to where Edward and I were expected to celebrate certain holidays. Negotiations could go on for months. Alice and Jasper's lasted three because they were both from established money so there was more to discuss. Someone in my position however, I would doubt negotiations would even last longer than one month. My parents weren't in any position to argue. They should feel blessed to receive anything the Cullen's would give.
Once negotiations were over and the union was blessed by both families, then the wedding season would begin. Oh god, I would be just beginning my wedding season when Alice was well into hers. How was I going to handle being a maid of honor for her wedding while planning my own? Alice did say that she might choose to have a quick wedding season. She couldn't wait to have sex so that could easily push up her timeline whereas, I wouldn't be engaging in sex so Edward and I could possibly take our time. No need to rush over here. This virgin was doomed to walk the earth with her hymen in tack for all eternity. The price to pay for agreeing to this foolish plan.
My breakfast was uncomfortable. My parents staring at me with these goofy grins like they were hyenas looking at Top Sirloin. I think I preferred it when they forgot to notice I was even around.
I assume that Jessica took her Jacob Black with her or sent him back to the west. I wasn't exactly sorry to see him go but I felt a little bad because I did hope to drop a couple of pounds in time for Alice's wedding. It then sets in. I'm going to be forced to wear white! Oh no! You don't let a heavy girl wear white. I feel clammy at the thought of standing in front of thousands of people on my wedding day looking like a blimp that should be floating overhead while Edward stands beside me trying his best to not be embarrassed.
I look down at the donut I swiped from the breakfast table and throw it out the window. Okay…leafy greens and lean proteins, right? That's what Jacob said. I can do this. I mean, it's only for a couple of months. Eating right is half the battle, Jacob said. The other half would be to work out. I sighed and looked over to our back hill. I guess this meant pushing a tire up it.
I spent the rest of my morning starring at my closet. There was absolutely nothing in it that gave off a good enough impression to win over Edward's parents. To be fair, I don't think anyone made that kind of miracle outfit. I pulled out my girdle knowing it would shave off a few pounds and therefore, somewhat helpful. Black pants were definite. There was no way I was planning on showing off my fat cankles. Now onto finding a decent shirt. I had a decent black top that I would wear to funerals but since I was already wearing black pants, I didn't want to show up in the dead of summer looking like I just came from a funeral. I pulled out a dark purple top. Anything that might make me feel comfortable looked too out of season. It was summer. I was expected to wear light colors.
Once again, I felt the need to cancel.
I pull out my phone and fight with myself over hitting send on my standard text message. Just as I continued to debate back and forth, my phone lit up and showed Edward's name for the first time since I added him to my address book.
Ready for today?
NO!
No
I bit my lip and continued to type.
I think we should hold off. Just give me another day. I kind of need to do something before I meet with your family.
That was an honest request. He shouldn't be too upset with that.
My phone lights up and he is calling once again. I don't want to answer. After last night, I really don't want to talk to him. I don't need him making me feel like an idiot. I finally hit the button to accept the call.
"What's wrong now?"
Not even a hello. No good morning that I lied to my parents about.
"Look, I know that whatever I say won't be good enough for you. Give me another day, Edward. I'm not ready to do this. And you can tell me that I'm stupid all you like but that won't change how I feel."
"Bella, I don't think you are stupid. Why would you ever think that?"
Well, he never actually said he thought I was stupid. He just made me feel stupid. Now I was feeling even more stupid for snapping at him. This was so frustrating. Was this how it worked in real relationships? Why would anyone want this?
I hear him sigh waiting for the answer I was searching for.
"This is like that time I invited you out to that party at the pond. You got mad at me and stormed out of our library. If I hadn't come to your window that evening, our friendship might have ended then. This rant of yours isn't about me or my parents. It's something else."
A silly tear escapes and left a solid wet trail down my face. I can't believe he remembered that. His family was having a huge picnic and swim party at the pond behind his house. Edward invited me and was offended when I said I wouldn't go. There was no way I would show up to a swim event, heavy as I am.
After the party was over, Edward showed up at my window and threatened to wake my parents if I didn't tell him what I was so upset with him over. I told him not wanting to feel the wrath from my father and mother over why a Cullen boy was at my bedroom window past midnight. I broke down and told him my shame.
I sniffled and wiped my tear.
"Are you going to blackmail me again?"
"I didn't blackmail you then," he defended.
"You told me that if I didn't sneak out of my parent's house and go with you to the pond at one in the morning, you would wake my parents and tell them that I lured you out of your house that night as a prank."
"Bella, I merely gave you options. You choose which option made you most comfortable."
I wasn't comfortable. I reluctantly grabbed my swimsuit and pulled on a loose t-shirt and followed him to the lake. He never again asked me to go swimming in public. He respected my need to shy away from everyone except himself. After that night, it was expected that anytime there was a pond party, we would have our own private party later that night where only the moon would out my unnatural shape.
"So are you going to tell me what is wrong, or do I have to come to your window and threaten to tell your parents that you are blackmailing me into marrying you."
I gasped. "Edward Cullen! I am doing no such thing. God, you sound like Jessica."
"That hurts," he replied.
I sighed. "I don't have anything to wear. Your parents are going to be very unhappy and my best outfit is all black. They will think I am cult worshipper or at best, just come from a funeral. I need more time."
"Well, first of all, they know you, so I doubt cult worshipper would come straight to mind," he paused. "Let me call you back."
Once again, he hung up the phone before I could get a word in edgewise. This time I need only to wait five minutes before he texted me back. He didn't call like he said he would. He texted.
Sending over something now. Wear it. I'm turning off my phone before you can protest. Sending a car for you at one-thirty. Be ready. I have advised the driver to come in and pull you out in whatever you are wearing. Money talks.
I scrunched up my nose at the audacity of his message. He may send in his driver but If I am not here, what would his driver be able to do with that? You aren't as clever as you think, Mr. Cullen. I folded my arms feeling triumphant but that slowly dwindled when I thought of Edward's past actions. He always had a knack for getting whatever he wanted. He always found a way, shady or not.
Fine. I will see what he sends over and then decide. Knowing him, he wouldn't have the faintest idea of what size I wear. It wasn't like he could tell his salesperson to send over a dress fitting a meet up with the parents and be sure to order that in an above average size…possibly around the magnitude of hefty meeting heavy. I snorted knowing that whatever Edward would send would either be far too small or far too big.
I was wrong.
A car drove up and dropped off a large box. My mother wouldn't let me leave the room until she saw what my boyfriend had sent over. Her words.
I sliced open the box and pulled out all the tissue paper and inside was quite possibly the loveliest dress I might ever wear. I say might because I was still concerned about sizing issues.
"Oh, Bella. Edward has taste," my mother panted. She ran her hands over the soft smooth fabric. It was blue but a darker blue with yellow and white flowers. The sleeves were three-quarters in length with lace on the ends, so it would hide my arm fat and it looked about long enough to reach mid-calf. I guess I would have to show off my legs but with its full skirt, it might help in giving the allusion of a smaller waist especially if I squeezed into a girdle.
"Go put it on."
I looked at the tag and it was my size. How did he know my size? I slowly walked over to the downstairs bathroom and shed my clothes. I pulled the dress on and my mother ran up to grab my girdle. She was back in record time. I squeezed my butt into it and then my mother waited as I pulled the dress up and over. It fit perfectly. I look at myself in the mirror as my mother buttons up the back.
"Bella," she gasped. "You have never looked lovelier. You look like a lady."
She began to pull at my hair and play with it while I continued to stare. It was the first time in my life that I felt like a lady. I felt pretty. Even with the extra pounds. Still not good enough to be a Cullen but…perhaps when all this was over, I would be good enough for someone.
AN: I cannot express how much your kind words have meant. I am so happy you are enjoying the story. I hope you will continue to do so. A reminder that this takes place in an alternate universe. See you this weekend with more.
STORY IS MINE. CHARACTERS BELONG TO STEPHENIE MEYER.