Ok everyone, thanks for the reviews. And for Straying Life, no, this story will not go to "R" rating. From now on, it's just gonna be straight-assed silly humor with a few small references thrown in for my older readers. So, on with the show.

Chapter 2
Another Flashback and a "Professional"

(Danny's POV)

"You think something's wrong?" Sam asked, half awake.

"Nah, I don't think so" I said, smoothing her hair. "Go back to sleep. You look bushed"

Sam nodded and yawned, falling back asleep. I smiled as I pulled her closer to me; kissing her forehead gently. I remembered how her parents were about to not let me see her again. I wasn't gonna let that happen. I love Sam too much to never even SPEAK to her again. You can bet that I thought of a way to get back at her parents.

(Flashbacked!)

May 13th, 2010

I had gotten an AIM from Sam in the wee hours of the morning around 2:00. She said for me to fly to her house and come through her window. I was confused, seeing as I did that every time I saw her. But this was different. There was no "Hey Dan! How's it goin?" conversations like we used to have. It was just a request. Being the curious little demon I was, I respected Sam's wishes by flying over.

When I got there, I saw Sam sitting on her bed listening to music. As much of the Oingo Boingo, Aerosmith, and Avenged Sevenfold fan that she was, Sam loved to listen to older music. The Beatles, The Doors, Queen, and Bob Seger were just a few of the artists occupying her collection. And she didn't have many CD's. She was a vinyl collector. And yes, they still make them. You can go to Hot Topic RIGHT NOW and buy Avenged Sevenfold "City Of Evil" and listen to "Bat Country" like it was made in the 50's.

I flew into her room and just sat on her bed. She looked at me and smiled and I smiled back. And we just sat there for the next 3 minutes smiling at each other.

Well, this is going nowhere fast. I thought to myself. You think she asked me to come over to her house at 2 in the morning to just sit and smile? Say somethin!

"Sam…" I started. I was at a loss for words once Sam's lips met mine. She knocked me over, hitting my head on her bedpost. I would have to ignore the pain later. Something gnawing on the back of my mind was telling me that Sam needed me right now.

And then it happened.

She opened her mouth slightly and pushed her tongue shyly into my mouth. My eyes snapped open and stood that way for about 5 seconds. This was new for me. I had no idea what to do. I was like George W. Bush trying to sign a peace treaty for the U.S. and France: it was HOPELESS.

So I did what I thought I should've done. I kissed back, pressing my tongue gently against hers. And they started to move against each other softly for a while. And for a while, I was in heaven. Here I was, 18 years old, kissing the love of my life. I think my life was ok.

So after all that, we pulled back. Sam's eyes widened and she blushed hard.

"Oh man, Danny" she said. "I'm sorry. I just…"

I then hugged her, silencing her. She hugged back.

"Sam" I said, still in the embrace. "I love you, so much. And I'm not creeped out at all by that"

"Really?" Sam asked, looking up.

"Really" I said. "I admit, I was a little weirded out by it for a second. But it felt so natural after that."

"Ok" Sam said. "But, maybe we should hold off on that for a while"

"Just back to regular kissing?' I asked.

Sam leaned up and kissed me softly. No tongue, just a soft, sweet kiss. And I kissed back, smiling into the kiss.

"Does that answer your question?" Sam asked.

"You bet" I said. "So, why'd you call me here?"

Sam looked down sadly. I was confused. I lifted her head up by the chin gently.

"Please tell me" I said.

"My parents…" she said. "They don't want us seeing each other anymore"

My eyes widened. Were her parents still pissed at me for taking her on the road trip a few months ago?

"Why?" I asked her.

"I don't know. But my guess is that they just don't like it that your family is on a lower class than mine. Plus the fact that they don't believe a Catholic person and a Jewish person can't get together doesn't help either"

This came as a shock to me. I knew Sam's parents were mean upper-class pricks, but being against someone's religion was another story. That made me angry.

"What are we gonna do?" Sam asked. "They know everyone at the school and will contact the school to find out if I'm even LOOKING at you"

What WERE we gonna do? I started thinking, but nothing came to mind. If it weren't for my keen sense of snooping, I would've never have seen the envelope.

"Sam, what's that?" I asked, pointing to the envelope on her desk.

"Oh, an invitation to this big dinner tomorrow at this bull-shit country club my parents go to" Sam said. "Why?"

I walked over and picked it up. And as I read, an evil grin came onto my face.

"I like that look" Sam said. "What's the plan?"

"You might get grounded by your parents…" I said.

"I don't care" Sam said. "Just as long they allow me to see you again"

I smiled and explained to her the plan. She started laughing and she agreed with the plan.

"Good idea, Dan" she said. "You sure it'll work?"

"If not, then I'll just sneak out every night and visit you" I said.

"Like you do every night?'

"Exactly"

She smiled and kissed me.

"Goodnight, Dan" she said.

"Night, Sam" I said, flying out the window.

(THE NEXT DAY!)

Sam and I walked through the doors of the fancy-schmancy country club and we walked to the doors of the dining room.

"You're sure we should do this?" I asked Sam.

"Dan, when have you ever been worried about embarrassing the hell out of someone?" Sam asked me.

I thought about this for a second.

"You just made fun of me, didn't you?" I asked.

Sam laughed.

"Took you a while" she said. "Always the clueless one"

"Hey, I'm your boyfriend, right?"

Sam smiled and kissed me quickly.

"Yeah, you are. About 4 years later"

I hugged her and kissed her forehead.

"You ready?" I asked.

"Yep, let's do this"

I kicked the door open with a large slam. I saw almost a hundred rich people staring at us with shocked faces, including Sam's parents.

"How's everyone doing tonight?" I asked loudly.

No reply.

"Alrighty!" I said. "Let's eat"

I walked to the front desk and looked for an open table on the list. There was opening for 2 people at Sam's parent's table under the name "Abe Froman" The manager came over to the front desk.

"Hello sir and madam" he said. He had a snooty French accent. He was not one to be reckoned with. "May I help you?"

"You can sure as hell try" I said. "Hi, I'm Abe Froman, and this is Samantha Manson"

"Abe Froman?" the man asked, snickering.

"Yes, is there a problem?" I asked.

"You are the sausage king of Amity Park?" he asked.

What? THAT guy was part of this country club? That same guy who wore a giant weenie costume on TV?

"Yes, yes I am" I said.

"Listen, young man, I am very busy here" the man said. "So why don't you take your little Goth chick to some shit-faced poetry slam"

Sam was about to knock the teeth out of the poor Frenchie. I held Sam's fisted hand back.

"Are you suggesting that I am not who I say I am?" I asked. I was trying to be completely laid-back about this.

"I'm suggesting that you two leave before I have to get snooty" the man said.

"Snooty?"

"Ok, Abe" Sam said. "Let's go"

"No, I'm not goin' anywhere" I said. "No, we'd like to be seated"

"Look, either you go out right now, or I'll call the police" the French taunter said.

"The police?" I asked. "You're gonna call the police on me? Fine! As a matter of fact, I'll call them myself, thank you"

I picked up the phone on the desk and dialed what the Frenchman thought was the police number, but was actually the restaurant number. The phone rang as I was on the line.

"Please give me the phone" the Frenchie said. "I have another call"

"No" I said.

"I've had enough of this horsing around. Give me the phone"

He extended a hand to my arm. I backed away, clutching the phone.

"You touch me, I scream 'rape'" I said. "There's another phone around here somewhere, find it"

The French man knew that he was gonna lose this argument, so he up and walked off to find another phone. He looked at Sam.

"I weep for the future" he said to Sam.

Now, before you call me insane for acting like this, you must understand; I've dealt with a great deal of French people in my life, and I know how to work my way around them.

"Ok, Dan" Sam said. "Hang it up, you're gonna get us arrested"

"Since when do you care if the cops get us?" I asked.

A brief pause.

"Ok, you've got me there" Sam said. "But please, even though this is me talking, I think you're going too far on this. My parents are gonna get you busted and I'll never even get to speak to you again"

A: You can never go too far.
B: If I'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by people like Sam's parents.

"Ask for Abe Froman" I said, handing the phone to Sam.

"Hello?" the Frenchman said on the other line.

"Hello, may I speak to Abe Froman" Sam asked. "The sausage king of Amity Park?" Sam was holding back a laugh. I think that she was enjoying this.

"Let me check the restaurant" the man said, looking our way. Sam turned around so the Frenchie couldn't see her on the phone. "Could you describe him for me?"

"Black hair, dark blue jacket, blue eyes, devastatingly handsome" Sam said. I smiled. Why, yes, she was enjoying it.

"Hold on one moment" the Frenchman said, switching to the other line.

"Excuse me, Mr. Froman" I said in a deep, Scottish accent. "This is Sgt. Jameson, of the Amity Police Force"

A minute later we were at Sam's parents table.

"I appreciate your understanding" the Frenchman said.

"Don't mention it" Sam said. "It's understanding that makes it possible for people like us to tolerate people like you"

I looked over at Sam's parents, with a grin and a wave. They looked at me with evil eyes.

I used to think that my family was the only one who was weird. That used to worry me, until I met Sam's parents. I mean, she's the best girl I've ever met: smart, funny, beautiful…It's hard to believe she came from people like her parents.

Her homelife is pretty twisted though. That's why I either have to rescue her from her own house or she fakes sick. If I ever lived in that house, I'd probably pray for disease too. The place is like a museum: it's very beautiful and very cold, and you're not allowed to touch anything. I mean, if it wasn't for me and the power of influences like Oingo Boingo, Tim Burton, and Kevin Smith, the girl would become a hermit at age 22.

I decided that now was the time to engage my plan to embarrass the HELL out of Sam's parents. I started eating the bread, ripping it apart with my hands.

"Want some?" I asked Sam.

"Absolutely" Sam said, digging into the bread.

Sam's parents looked at us even more evilly.

"Uh…Samantha" Sam's mom whispered to her. "Why did you bring HIM?"

"You did say I needed to bring a date" Sam said. "Only thought my boyfriend would be sufficient"

An idea came into my head. I leaned over to the table next to us and spoke with a very deep voice to the family of 5.

"Hey" I asked in a deep, yet annoying, voice. "How much for the little girl?"

"What?" the father asked.

"Your women. I want to buy your women!" I said.

Sam stifled a giggle.

"Isn't he a charmer?" Sam asked.

I leaned back over and noticed that the shrimp we ordered had come. I picked one up as Sam opened her mouth letting me toss the shrimp into her mouth. This continued as Sam's parents continued to be embarrassed. This went on until Sam's dad took me over to the bathroom.

"Look, Fenton" he started. I stopped him.

"Let me tell you something, Chuck" I said. "Sam is the most awesome, beautiful, and smartest girl I've ever met. She is also everything you are not: nice, unselfish, reasonable, and she smells good. You went a little overboard on the cologne there"

Chuck's face went red with anger as he sniffed his armpit.

"Nonetheless" he said. "The way you are behaving tonight is unacceptable. You are going to get this family kicked out of the country club"

I leaned in. Close to the vest I remembered.

"If you forbid Sam to see me," I said, "I will come back here to this restaurant every day, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner"

Chuck's face went pale.

"Do we have a deal?" I asked, extending my hand. He shook it nervously.

And to this day, I've yet to see another invite on Sam's desk.

(End flashback)

(End Danny's POV)

It wasn't just the pilot and the co-pilot who had passed out. People were passing out left and right. And the one thing that was common in all the people who were sick was that they all had fish for dinner.

"Is there a doctor on the plane?" the stewardess asked.

"I am" a man said. He had short white hair and was in his early 80's. But he looked to be 65. "My name is Henry Smithe-Smythe-Smith. I'm a professional in this field: fish disease"

He examined all the sick people and soon found a very sick woman. He came back to the stewardess.

"You need to call the airport station and tell them we need to land as soon as possible" Henry said. "This woman has to get to a hospital"

"A hospital?' the stewardess asked. "What is it?"

"It's a big building with sick people, but that's not the point. This woman is violently ill"

"But we can't land the plane" the stewardess said. "The pilot and the co-pilot are passed out. And the auto-pilot has only 15 more minutes on it"

"Damn" Henry said. "Well, we need someone on this plane to fly it. Someone who has a very high attention span, someone with keen eyesight, and someone with flying skills"

And for some strange reason, Danny Fenton was chosen to fly the plane.

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PhantomAL