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Chapter Three
Grissom quickly but carefully finished looking over the evidence, logged it and jumped in his car. He was hoping that when he got home everything would be okay.
There was only one light on in the townhouse. The kitchen. He used his key to open the door. "Sara?" He called out. He found his bride sitting at the table nursing a mug of coffee. "I hope that's decaf." He said with a slight smile.
She gave a small chuckle and in genuine Sara fashion got up and began pacing the kitchen nervously. He watched her closely and wondered how he could have missed all these changes before. She carried herself differently, more carefully. Her stomach had a slight swell to it that he had never noticed, her skin was fresh and clear. She was glowing. How could so much have changed about her without him even noticing?
"Please Gil, say something." Her feet were still now as she stood in the middle of the kitchen tugging at the hem of her shirt. He tried to summarize everything. Tried to say something that would wrap up everything he was seeing.
"I haven't seen you for a while. Have I?" She looked him for a moment her brown eyes unreadable.
"You see me everyday." She looked away sadly and shrugged.
"No I mean I haven't seen you. Looked at you. Realized how beautiful you are. I'm so sorry. So sorry Sara."
Sara gave him a weak smile. "I wanted to tell you last night." Tears started to build up in her eyes. She looked away from him.
Grissom heart broke in two and he took a step toward her. "I should have been there. I forgot honey." She nodded her head but still didn't look at him. He took another step towards her. Then another few until he was standing right in front of her. He reached out a laid a hand on her belly.
"When did you find out?" He finally looked up at her.
"Two weeks ago." She placed her smaller hand over his. Her eyes were still shining with tears watching their overlapped hands resting on their child. He watched her face trying to understand.
"Why didn't you tell me before?" He was genuinely curious.
"First it was because I wanted to be sure. Then it was because I wanted to find the right way. And then it was because I realized I had been putting it off for two weeks because I was scared." She finally let the tears slide down her cheeks.
"Why?" He wanted to kiss all those droplets of sadness away.
"I don't know." Her shoulders barely shrugged. She looked back down at their hands. "I think maybe I thought that you wouldn't want this. Want us."
"Sara, us is what I want more than anything in the world. You are my life. We're really having a baby?"
Sara could sense excitement in his voice. She nodded. "Yeah, we're having a baby." Sara could see tears in Grissom's eyes.
He pulled her closer to him. "I love you Sara. More than anything. More than anyone. We're a family."
She buried her face in his chest and laughed against him. "I'm sorry I have been so...so sensitive? Bitchy? Whatever lately. I can't help it." Her voice was muffled against him.
"I'm sorry I wasn't more understanding." Grissom rubbed her back gently in long strokes along her spine.
"Well you didn't know." She reasoned.
"How could I have missed it though?" He asked pulling back and looking down at her changing body again.
"Everyone is entitled to be a space cadet every now and then. Even science geniuses."
"Husbands shouldn't be though."
She smiled and tucked her head under his chin. "I don't like it when we fight."
"Neither do I. I'm so sorry Sara."
"Now that we're made up I require three things. Chocolate, a massage and a 'kiss-it-better'." She motioned to her head where the skin was purple and slightly raised. Gil puckered up dramatically and guided her head down by her chin. He planted a whisper of a kiss on the knot.
"Better?" He asked raising her face to meet his eyes. She nodded her head; it wasn't, but what the hell.
"Come on, I want to go to bed."
"Do you want me to come with you or do you want your space tonight?"
Sara didn't say anything but tugged on his hand. He smiled and followed her up to bed.
"Hold me." She whispered. Grissom was happy to comply as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her temple.
"You were sick a lot tonight." He mentioned.
"Yeah, it was worse than usual. Stress maybe." She shrugged and snuggled deeper into him. Grissom felt a pang of guilt again.
"Are you feeling okay now?" He asked kneading her shoulders.
"Still sick but a little better." She visibly relaxed under his touch. "Gil?"
"Yes dear?"
"You put the bathroom door on backwards."
"Oh…" He looked over at the door. She was right. "Do you want me to fix it now?"
"No." She closed her eyes. "Sleep now."
Although Grissom had memorized her features years ago, he spent a few minutes looking over them. Shutting his eyes, her beautiful face still in his mind.
With his eyes closed he could see her features softened by the shadows of their bedroom. In nights when his eyes were ruled by lust those shadows would sharpen her features giving her an angular exotic look. On other nights, like this one when he was washed over with calmness the shadows would soften her face highlighting the bridge of her nose and casting the rest in darkness. Her eyelashes were fanned out, long and dark. He loved her face, everything about it. He loved everything about her.
He put his hand on her stomach. Even for a scientist, it was hard to believe that another life was growing in there. But it was. A beautiful, perfect life, because it was coming from Sara, and she was those things to him. He had no idea how he'd gotten so lucky to have her in his arms.
Sara started to whimper. He knew she was having a nightmare. "Shhhh Honey, it's alright." He planted small kisses on her cheeks and forehead. Her face quickly relaxed. Smiling, he shut his eyes and fell asleep.
Sara was the first to wake. It was still a good few hours before shift so she had plenty of time to get ready. She untangled herself from Grissom and searched through a pile of clothes she hadn't had time to fold and put away. She found a pair of pajama bottoms and a tank top, got dressed and padded down the stairs to the kitchen in search of food. Grissom woke for the second day in a row to find himself alone in bed. He quickly rolled out of bed and walked down to the living room. He relaxed when he saw Sara, not sleeping on the couch, but sitting at the table eating yogurt and reading the newspaper.
"Hey there." He smiled.
"Hey." She gave him a small smile back.
"Let me fix you something real to eat." He nodded towards her yogurt.
Sara eyebrows knitted together in mock confusion. "I'm sorry; I didn't realize that I was imagining this." She picked up the empty container and aimed for the garbage. Missed, dammit. She groaned as she got to her feet. She didn't get far though as Grissom picked up her trash and put it in the bin. "Thanks." She sat back down. "It's weird. It doesn't matter how much I sleep I get, I'm always exhausted." She watched her husband as he grated cheese and chopped tomatoes to make her an omelet.
Sara watched as Grissom made her breakfast, he was so sweet. Before she knew it, she had tears welling up in her eyes. She slammed her open palm down on the table. "Stupid hormones!"
Grissom turned to look at her in shock. "Are you ok?"
"Yes, fine." She started to cry. Then she shook her head. "What's wrong with me?"
Grissom put the knife he was using down and crossed over to her. His knees cracked as he crouched down so he was eye level with her hunched form. Running a hand lovingly over her cheek he tilted her downcast face up to meet him. "I'm not an expert on pregnancy but I have heard that uncontrollable moods are a normal thing. As is tiredness, especially in the first trimester. It will be okay." He kissed her sweetly before standing back up and going back to his breakfast task.
"Why are you so nice to me?" She asked quietly. "After all the hurtful things I've said to you in the last day."
"You're my wife Sara. And I was the one who messed up. I forgot about our date and I ruined our special night. I really want to make it up to you." He paused as ideas ran through his head. "What would you say to dinner tomorrow night at the Bellagio?"
"Really?" He watched as she almost leaped with excitement.
"Really." He smiled amused by her sudden change in mood. He finished cooking her omelet and dished it out on a plate for her. He slid the plate in front of her on the table.
"Ketchup?" She asked picking up her fork. He tried to determine whether or not she was serious. When he didn't move she shrugged her shoulders and tried to explain. "I don't know Gil. I was eating ketchup on toast the other day. It just appeals to me." Her husband smiled amused.
"Anything for you sweetheart." He got the half empty bottle out of the fridge and made himself a mental note to pick some more up from the store. She drowned her omelet in the thick red sauce and he had to turn away and she began eating. Her plate looked like a crime scene. He went back tot he stove and began making his own breakfast, adding some ham to his. "You aren't going to ask for ketchup at the restaurant tomorrow, are you?" He asked only half kidding.
"Would you kill me if I did?" She looked up at him.
"Nah, but I would kill anyone who said anything about." Sara smiled at his response and turned back to her breakfast. With her back to him she asked, "Are you really happy about the baby Gil?" Grissom removed the pan from the stove and emptied the perfect Omelet onto his plate. He put the plate down by the seat next to her and sat down taking her hand in his. She was looking at him with an expression he had never seen her wear before, with an uncertainty he had never seen in her eyes.
"Sara I love you with everything that is in me. This baby is a part of you and it would be impossible for me not to love him or her because of the love I have for you. I had never thought much about having or wanting children before I saw those tests but when I saw them and realized what they meant it felt like I had never wanted anything longer. It all seemed so perfect. So yes Sara, I am very happy about the baby." He gave her hand a final squeeze and kissed her again tasting ketchup. The sauce had never tasted so good before. She smiled and went back to eating.
"I'm happy that you're happy Gil."
"I'm happy that you aren't crying." He winced as she smacked him in the chest.
"Hey now, that's not nice." He said with a grin.
She mock pouted. "Hey, I have bruises, so should you."
"How is your head anyways?"
"It's fine." She avoided his eyes and got up to rinse her plate and put it in the dishwasher.
"Sara fine? Or the real kind." He watched her closely. She rolled her shoulders back and stood up straighter challenging him with her body.
"The real kind." She opening the fridge and poured herself a glass of milk. "I have an appointment, with my OB-GYN tomorrow morning after work. Do you want to come?" As she asked him Sara reached into the back of the cabinet and got two white pill bottles out. She waited for his response.
"Of course I would. But I have a meeting...maybe I can miss out." She swallowed the pills that she had counted.
"Don't worry about it. Its nothing fancy, just a check-up." She washed everything down with the milk and put her pill bottles back in the cupboard, this time right up front.
"What are those?" He nodded his head to the closed door.
"Prenatal vitamins."
"You really don't mind if I don't come? Or you 'Sara don't mind'."
"Is there a difference?"
"Yes." She considered this.
"No. I really don't mind. The real kind. Go to your meeting. I will just have this baby on my own."
"Sara..."
"Kidding."
"Not funny." He groaned.
She put her hand on top of his and looked into his eyes. "I really don't mind if you don't come. Cause I know you want to be there. That's what matters. I mean it'd be great if you could come. But hey, we all have to work." She smiled.
"How did I get such an understanding wife?" He asked her with a smile.
"I wish." She sighed. "I definitely wasn't understanding yesterday."
"Hey, that was my fault. I told you not to worry about it. You had every right to be mad."
"I don't want to be mad at you."
He kissed her, placing his hand back on her stomach. "You're going to be a good mommy."
Sara sat up with a start as she realized something. "What are we going to tell the guys? They have no idea about us, and when I start showing…"
"You're already showing." Grissom pointed out. She looked down and frowned. He looked at her curious. "What's wrong honey?"
"Nothing I... you're right. Well we are going to have to tell them really soon then." She played with the gold ring on his finger.
"I'll make Catherine do it." He heard her groan as she dropped her head dramatically. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." She shook her head. "It's fine." She caught his look. "The real kind." Sara offered gently. Grissom decided to trust her for the moment.
"Okay." He pulled her in for a kiss. "I need to shower."
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