Authors note: I told you it would be uploaded Saturday, but it was one day late. Now the next update most likely won't come out until next Sunday, unless there is a snowstorm and school is cancelled.

I would like to say thank you to everyone who has been reading so far. I really do appreciate it, but I would like to have more reviews. I honestly wasn't expecting to get as many views as I have been though, so thanks anyway. If you feel that I could do better in certain areas, then please don't hesitate to tell me. I'm a new and inexperienced writer, so I EXPECT many mistakes on my first story.

Oh, here are the poll rankings:

Fem Gaara – 28

Fem Haku – 24

Hinata – 20

Tayuya – 20

I couldn't drop any of the characters because the last two are tied. The results will be posted next chapter, so any who want the pairing a certain way, go to my profile and vote!

I would also like to tell you why this story seems serious in a way, yet is located in the humor section. You see, I have a very dark sense of humor, so things like the shock value of losing limbs is humorous to me. There is a reason why this story is rated M, mostly due to the heads that will start to fly in chapter six…

Anyway, I just thought that you should know that the story will get violent later on. If you continue reading, you have been warned.

Now, let's see what happens when the villagers learn of Narutos' heritage. It's not going to be pretty to say the least.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, if I did, the main character would actually be the main focus of the story instead of his emo 'friend'.

Onward to chapter 4!

Naruto was currently at the entrance to what was now his new home. After flashing out of the meeting with the elders and council, he started laughing his ass off. The looks of utter horror on their faces were engraved into his memories forever. But they had much bigger problems awaiting them then they thought. But he would think more about their punishments later.

Right now, he needed to be focused on getting into his new estate. The gates were just as massive as his new neighbors the Hyuga clans' gate. He was happy to see the privacy seals around the entire area, it wouldn't do for anyone to be able to constantly spy on him from their own home.

He smeared blood on the front of the gate to make it open, as the reason why it hasn't been broken into before are the numerous blood seals littering the area. When they finally pushed open, Naruto was blown away by what he saw.

It was a much more luxurious mansion then he had expected. Granted that most of the area was covered in various environmental training grounds, the home itself was much larger than the main housing areas of the Hyuga. He quickly snapped out of his stupor and sent out a horde of shadow clones to clean and scout out the property. It had still taken nearly half an hour for 1000 clones to see everything.

With the memories he had gained from the clones, he learned that the home was divided into four floors. Each floor had its own specific purpose and theme added to them.

The first floor was actually a basement of sorts. There was a huge training ground with weapons of all kinds around it, and they all looked to be top of the line. It would seem that this area is supposed to be for testing out the more dangerous jutsu and seals. A great idea in Narutos' opinion, seeing as how most will explode in your face the first few hundred tries when creating them. That was how most of his shadow clones had met their end. He shuddered at the thought of him being the one during some of those experiments.

Moving on, the ground floor was mostly composed of a single giant dining room and kitchen. The only ones who most likely had a larger kitchen in the entire village were the Akimichi clan. This was most likely used by his father for entertaining foreign ambassadors, or wealthy trade company owners.

The second story was the main living area. It would be the perfect area for raising a family. It held an air of regality, but was warm and inviting as a home should be as well. It contained five very large bedrooms; the five bathrooms connected to them were more like giant hot spring areas, and a much smaller dining room and meeting area in the direct center. All in all, it actually felt like a true home should. He knew then that he was going to love living here. He would easily be able to find a willing wife once his family name got out. Also, he had grown his spikey hair down to his shoulders, mainly to look like his father.

The final floor though, was by far his favorite. It was a giant library that made even the personal library in use by the Hokage seem like an ant compared to an elephant. Naruto knew that he was much more intelligent than most of the people on the continent, but it never hurt to gain more knowledge. The books contained everything one would possibly want to know about anything, though the S – ranked and forbidden jutsu were locked away in a vault at one end of the hallway.

He went straight up to the living area and fell onto what he thought was the nearest bed. He may have more stamina than anyone else, but dealing with the council for more than five minutes was bad for your health. He would have killed them, but didn't want any more negative attention on him from the public.

He slowly fell asleep, noticing the fact that he was on the kitchen table instead of a bed. Yep, it was official now. Dealing with them could cause the victim to have hallucinations as well. It seemed as though Danzo had tried to place him under a genjutsu to obey his every command, but thanks to chakra reflection seals he placed on his body, it only ended up slightly disorienting him. He would definitely have to do something about them soon.

The next morning;

Naruto awoke to find himself on the table, once again thankful for the seals on his body. He had already thought of what he could do now that Danzo assumed that he would have to obey him. He would follow him to the Root headquarters, and eliminate everyone inside, including Danzo himself. All he had to do to cover his tracks was completely conceal his chakra, follow the old fool, and insight chaos by killing their leader in front of them. From there it was just trapping them all in his impenetrable steel release jutsu, and unleashing a powerful fire jutsu to incinerate them all.

Shaking his head of those thoughts for now, he got up to begin one of the most important days of his life. Not. He wasn't foolish like most of the other kids were, and he knew that a majority of them that graduate wouldn't live past the age of twenty.

Being a ninja was a very dangerous occupation, something that most of the civilians didn't really understand. Any one of them could die at any given moment, it didn't matter how many 'cool' jutsu you had learned. A shinobi was one who killed without remorse, and was prepared to die for their village. Almost none of this year's rookies truly knew what they were getting themselves into, nor did they expect to kill or be killed on the battlefield at such a young age.

No matter, they would get a very disturbing wake-up call one day soon.

He headed out of the gate to see who his new team consisted of. All he hoped for was not to be on the same team as the duck-ass Sasuke and banshee. As long as he didn't have to work with them, he would be perfectly happy.

It's too bad the goddess of luck decided that he needed a rude awakening that day. He had nothing but good luck for the past two years. It was time for the return payment.

He arrived in the classroom in a yellow blur, scaring many of the students, and shocking the eternally brooding Sasuke.

If they thought that was a shock, then what they were seeing now might be enough to kill some of the weaker civilian students. A miniature fourth Hokage was standing in front of the class, he had the same physical appearance, as well as similar clothing. He was wearing a similar white cape, but with slight differences. It had the same red and orange flames at the bottom, but it also had the kanji for 'Elemental Cataclysm' across the back. Underneath was a blue and black variation of Anbu attire, as well as several scrolls filled into a green vest that are similar to the ones jounin wear.

By the time the initial shock had worn off, Iruka had walked back into the room with the Hokage, who had decided that they could use even more of a shock today. That and he wanted to get away from the mountains of paper work.

For the first time that year, Iruka didn't think he would have to scream for them to be silent. It would be incredibly disrespectful to even whisper out of place when the leader of your village is present for official business.

Too bad he places way too much faith in his students.

"What do you think you're doing idiot!? Are you trying to look cooler than Sasuke-kun!? A dead last like you could never compare to him!"

No one needs me to tell them that Sakura was the one who yelled that right?

After her little outburst in front of the Hokage, even the other useless fan girls were starting to question her grip on reality. A stunt like that could get kids from other, less kind villages executed.

Acting like nothing she had said had fazed him, Naruto bowed and politely said, "I'm glad to see you here lord Hokage. May I ask the reason why you are here today? Doesn't it inconvenience you to be out of the office for so long?"

"Not at all Naruto-san, even I need to get out to converse with the public for a while. That is an important responsibility as well for the Hokage."

"I see, thank you for your explanation Hokage-sama. I shall go to my seat to await my placement then."

The students watched as the two conversed as if no one else were in the room. This was supposed to be the loud mouth of the class? Even though he had calmed down by a considerable amount, this was just crazy. It had only been a day since they had seen him, so what was going on with him?

As Naruto tried to return to his desk, Sakura, still angry at being ignored, got up and threw a slow and sloppy punch at him. He easily dodged, pulled out a kunai, and was behind her holding it to her neck so quickly, no one but the Hokage could see him.

"I would advise you not to attack me without provocation, Haruno-san. Doing such a thing to a fellow Shinobi is punishable by death, and I will do my duty as a guardian of this village."

This stunned the students into complete silence. Even the normally sleeping Shikamaru Nara was staring at him wide eyed.

"Hokage-sama, what do you wish for me to do with her? Shall she be taken into custody, or do you wish for me to execute her right now?"

"No Naruto-san, release her for now. I believe that she has learned her lesson about proper conduct."

"Yes Hokage-sama." The moment he released her, she bolted to her seat, scared out of her mind. Even if she was a stupid fan girl, she did have survival instincts, and they were telling her not to cross the blonde in any way.

He walked up the steps to his seat and focused completely on the Hokage. Even if he was on friendly terms with the man in private, he had an image to maintain in public. Honorifics were even used by his son during official business.

"Now, I know that you are all wondering why Lord Hokage is in the room. The reason is that he plans to make an announcement to the entire village later today, but will be telling us first. If you will, Hokage-sama."

"Thank you Iruka-san. I have come here today to reveal the true identity of your classmate Naruto, who goes by the last name Uzumaki. I have kept his true lineage from everyone other than myself and Jiraiya of the Sanin. His last name currently in use is from his Mother, Kushina Uzumaki, aka the 'Red Death' of Konoha, and an S-class ninja with the bloodline of chakra chain usage, which has also passed down to Naruto as well. She was also the sole survivor of the Uzumaki clan that originated in Whirlpool country."

A large gasp was heard from the classroom. Many of them had learned of the 'Red Death', but were unable to learn the identity of them. It was classified as a village secret, only known to jounin and the council. She was known for being completely ruthless on the battlefield, always being covered in blood, which spread the rumor that her hair was actually died red from all of her victim's blood. Before any could respond, the elderly man continued.

"That is not all though. His true name is what needed to be kept a secret. His true name is Naruto Namikaze, and he is also the son of the fourth hokage, Minato Namikaze, better known as the 'Yellow Flash' of Konoha. He was from a fairly poor merchant family, but still qualified as a clan due to their amazing skill in fuinjutsu, or sealing as you know it, and was also the last member of that clan as well."

By now, the many students who had picked on him over the years, especially Sakura, were sweating bullets. He could make their lives a living hell if he wanted to! With two votes on the shinobi council, as well as the pull his name was sure to have, he could manipulate the entire council just the way he wanted to. Oddly enough, most of the class wasn't yelling like he thought they would. Instead, they were deathly quiet. No one spoke for what felt like hours, but in reality was just two minutes. Some people forgot how to breathe, including Iruka himself. They all slowly looked back at him in shock, waiting to see if he would say something.

"What are you all looking at? I thought that it was pretty obvious when I came in dressed like this. By the way, I do hold grudges."

He looked at some of them evilly while chuckling creepily, making some of them whimper of what they knew was coming for them.

"Well, with that out of the way, I shall now announce the teams for this year. (Teams 1-6 are unimportant) Team 7, Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno," she squealed at this getting ready to scream how 'true love always prevails' or some stupid fan girl crap like that, until she saw the entire class glaring at her, not wanting to get on the bad side of the Hokage or Naruto.

"As I was saying, the final member is Naruto Namikaze. Your jounin sensei is Kakashi Hatake."

They all heard a loud crashing noise, and turned to see Naruto repeatedly slamming his head into the desk, but looking as stoic as when he walked in. The Hokage continued to speak as if nothing were going on because he stopped after the third time.

"Team 8, will be Shino Aburame, Hinata Hyuga, and Kiba Inuzuka. Your jounin sensei will be Kurenai Yuhi. Team 9 is still in commission. Team 10 is Ino Yamanaka, Choji Akimichi, and Shikamaru Nara. Your jounin sensei is Asuma Sarutobi. They will be arriving shortly, so prepare yourselves. That is all."

And with that, he disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving a class with informational overload.

No one dared to make a move towards the blonde, all too afraid of what he might do. That was the sight that a woman with long black hair walked into.

"Well, doesn't this seem tense? Team 8, follow me to training ground 15, and don't be late."

They quickly got up, eager to leave the tenseness of the room. Except Hinata, who glanced back at Naruto, seemingly conflicted about something? He thought that was pretty strange. Even though he was a genius in most aspects, he was still a novice in romance. But what do you expect, him only having Sakura hit him in his earlier years was the closest he had ever gotten with a female, which even he had to admit was pretty sad.

The other teams slowly began to drift out as the class, until team seven were the only ones left. The tension, however, was as strong as ever. They waited for another two hours, and Naruto had been calmly reading a fuinjutsu book. It was his father's research notes to be exact, which detailed the plans Minato had for an anti-copying seal. This would allow Naruto to freely use jutsu, should he ever need to, and not worry about the Uchiha when he awakened the Sharingan. It was very useful stuff indeed.

A spikey haired jounin with a facemask came in lazily while holding an orange book.

"Team 7, my first impression of you is I hate you. Meet me up on the roof."

He puffed up in smoke, along with Naruto who instead decided to use lightning instead of plain smoke. Sasuke snarled in anger at how the 'dead last' had so much power.

'That power should be mine! I deserve it, because I am an Uchiha elite! I'll just make the loser give it to me, there's no way that I could lose!'

Obviously he was just as delusional as the banshee. He had lost several times, but leaves them all out to be more convincing. The sad part was it was to convince himself more than anyone else.

They met up on the roof for introductions, which were brief to say the least. The jounin started off using a very vague description.

"You already know my name; I don't feel like telling you my likes or dislikes, and as for dreams, that's personal. It's your turn to share pinky."

She scowled at the nickname, "My name is Sakura Haruno. I like… (Looks over at Sasuke), my dreams are… (once again looks at said emo), and I hate Ino and Nar-."

She paused at that, remembering what had happened earlier. She did NOT want to get on that kids bad side. She now knew that he would kill both of his teammates without hesitation should the need arise for it. The other three took notice of it as well.

"You're up mister sunshine."

Sasuke saw that he was talking to him and huffed. "I'm Sasuke Uchiha. I hate many things and like almost nothing. My dreams, no, my ambitions are to kill a certain man, revive my clan, and also… I'M GOING TO BE KING OF THE EMO'S."(Reference to One Piece series, which I also don't own.)

Naruto was incredibly confused and shocked at the statement, but the others seemed fine. Maybe that genjutsu had affected him more than he had thought. No matter, he would go home and dispel its effects as soon as he was done here.

"Okay then, your turn Blondie."

The nickname didn't affect him like he thought it would. "My name is Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze. I like ramen, training, the Hokage, and creating seals and jutsu. I dislike rapists, child abusers, those who can't look past rumors to see the real truth, and the civilian council. My dreams are to retire young and raise a family in a secluded town where no one could find me, as well as to purge as much evil from this world as I possibly can for my family to be safe in their lives."

Kakashi was surprised that Naruto had thought out that far ahead in his life. Most shinobi accept that they won't have families due to the extremely high death rate, so to dream of having a family in this occupation was not a very good idea. Never the less, he was happy that his sensei's son had not let that stop him.

"Well, we will meet tomorrow at five A.M. at training ground nine to take the real genin test. The one you have just taken is only the preliminary test. This test is much harder, and has only a 33% passing rate, oh and make sure not to eat anything. You'll puke if you do, and I don't want to clean up the mess."

Before they could respond, he was once again gone in a puff of smoke. Sasuke was about to demand that Naruto fight him, but realized that he was already gone as well. He left grumbling about the useless people all around him, with Sakura following behind like a lost puppy.

Naruto appeared back inside of his home, deciding to forgo the gate this time. He trained until dark, ate a light meal, and went to bed. He dispelled the remnants of the genjutsu cast over him, once again thinking of what he was going to do once he had the chance. He wondered how the village had taken learning about his true heritage. He knew that by tomorrow, the way he was treated would take a major turn. But he didn't know if it would be good or bad things to have everyone treat him like the Uchiha. He decided to think later on that subject. He would make that turn out to his advantage somehow.

At least he thought that he could.

That's the end of chapter 4!

This was a long chapter for me, so I hope that makes up for it being a day late. Remember that the poll results will be shown by the beginning of the next chapter, so vote!

Well that's all from me for now. PEACE!