Hey guys. I'm sorry for the delay I've started school just recently and a second job so my time isn't as abundant as it once was before. Any who, here goes another chapter. I feel the drama nearing!
I'm awoken to the smell of bacon, eggs, and a soft melody coming from my kitchen. Scanning my room I try to place the smell and the events of last night. My mind immediately tuning in to Lou; who tended to do things how she deemed fit and frankly I felt that this time it'd cost a lot more then a crass words and broken hearts. Sliding from under my blanket I pad to my bathroom to wash away my morning breathe and brush the wild mess I called hair. Following my nose to the kitchen I'm greeted with a pants less brunette who's voice brings so many memory's crashing my brain, and I hadn't even fully awoken.
"You didn't have to cook breakfast you know."
Startled, Lou jumped nearly dropping the hot skillet. "Oh ummm Good Morning. I wanted to thank you for letting me crash your bach pad. And I remembered how much you loved my meat lover's omelet's. So Bon Appetit!"
Taking a seat I eye my plate skeptically. While she saunters to the cabinets grabbing mugs for deliciously smelling coffee. As she reaches for the cupboard my eyes unconsciously travel to her well rounded backside; emphasizing her lack of pants once more. "Could you maybe put on some pants?"
Lou turns arching her eyebrow a smirk marring her face. I realized I'd admitted to gawking unintentionally. I can't hold her gaze so I try to cover the blush that's slowly rising up by neck by drinking the orange juice she'd so graciously poured me moments before. "Thinking of old times Mills?"
Breakfast was a nice gesture but I knew boundary's were needed and something told me I wouldn't exactly have a vacant sofa tonight either.
"No…..Just I don't think my girlfriend would appreciate my ex around me without clothes. You know it not being a good look and all." Its too early to argue, so I settle for a more resolved even tone. Lou walks over to the couch retrieving her shorts from the night before.
"Did the old man flip shit last night again?" I note the slight bruising above her jaw line.
"I'm ok. Just going to steer clear of the house for a few days. I told John to give him time to cool off and sober up. Things were pretty bad when I left." Her eyes looked so deject, so lost and it hurt seeing her like this, It made things complicated. I'd grown up with Lou. She'd had always been the quirky eccentric breathe taking girl next door; who showed me what it really meant to let go and feel. My heart still ached for her at times, even if we weren't together. Lou was a constant reminder of the girl who'd changed my life all those years ago.
Every fiber in my being screamed bad idea, but my heart spoke before my brain could process. "You know it can't be permanent; and I'd have to talk it over with Mariana, but I do have a spare room. If you could clean it out and throw in for rent occasionally it's yours."
By now she'd move to sit in front of me playing with her food in immense concentration. "I thought you didn't want her to know about us…." Her voice was just above a whisper.
" Look as much as I'm freaking out that Mari will dump me out on my ass when we finally do talk about everything, I am worried for you. And at the end of the day Mari would want you to be in a environment where you felt safe. She has an amazing heart, just like you." I sit my fork down and just stare at the beautiful girl in front of me. She did have a great heart but somewhere along the way she just got careless with it.
Lou gets up with her plate and places it into the sink. Turning to me she smiles that smile that caused me to fall head over heels years ago. "You know I do feel safe here." Running over she engulfs me into a hug all too familiar. Inhaling her scent I clutch her a bit closer. This was ok right. Just a hug?…. Callie and I hug all the time. I could do this.
"I miss how things used to be." I kiss her temple and enjoy our embrace a second more before releasing my hold. She sighs reluctantly.
"Me too…." was all I managed before the familiar ring tone of Mariana blasted through my living room. "Morning babe!" I see Lou roll her eyes before disappearing in the bathroom.
"Morning mi amor! I dreamt about you last night."
I smile because I'm well aware Mari is still snuggled in bed, sleep still in her eyes. I had to admit I loved being the first person she spoke to in the morning. Suddenly a wave of guilt washed over me. I eyed the bathroom door almost sure I would narc right in that moment.
"So love muffin I wanted to let you know I'd be a bit late tonight in case you came over for dinner after work." I could hear the hesitation on the other line. She wanted to tell me something but was second guessing herself.
"Love muffin? You've definitely been hanging around Callie and Wyatt too much." I smile into the phone trying to lighten her mood.
Mari giggles before continuing, "Oh you secretly love the pet names I give you." The momentary silence is followed by her exhaling sharply. "Ummm I kind of told Zac id go to see a play with him at the local theater later and then may be for ice cream."
I mentally counted to ten or I'd go off like a nuclear bomb and I'd been trying so hard to work on my jealousy issues with Zac lately. "So you agreed to a date with him?" I tried to keep my tone even but as what I was told started to sink in I realized it was a lost cause.
"No not a date just friends enjoying the summer. I haven't gotten out much and I thought it would be nice. Plus I've really wanted to see this play for awhile, but you've been super busy so….."
"Oh so now its my fault my girlfriend is going out on a date." Out of habit I run my hand through my hair until it lands on the base of my neck. "Really Mari? I'm trying not to blow up about this. I even used the ten second relaxation technique you taught me."
"Babe that's why I'm telling you. I don't want you freaking out on me. You have to remember Zac and I were friends before anything else and he knows my rules. I just would really like to get out." I could her Mari treading lightly with her words. She knew this would upset me. And a part of me couldn't help but think how huge of a hypocrite I was being but I didn't trust Zac. Not in the slightest, especially when it came to Mari.
"I know you've made commitments and I know sometimes that requires canceled dates or being late to pick me up occasionally and I've been nothing but understanding. This isn't a date just two friends enjoying a play and ice cream. If I were going with Wyatt or Matt you wouldn't object. I don't see the problem now. You trust me don't you?" Mariana's tone was accusing and I could sense her patience thinning.
"You know what fine. Go on your whatever it is with Zac. I just wish you'd ask me before you'd agreed to it." This conversation was slowly getting out of hand but my jealousy was clouding my logical abilities.
"So you don't trust me? Allison that's completely uncalled for. At least I'm telling you. Which is more then I can say for some." Mariana by passed annoyed and went straight to pissed. I knew I was overreacting but all I heard was she and Zac alone in a darkroom where he had rein to bore holes through her he pleased with his eyes and I had no way of stopping it. God! I wish Mari wasn't so oblivious to the way he looked at her. Even I could see he was still in love with her. If anything the distance made it increase tenfold.
As silence was met on the other line all I could hear was Mari's ragged breathing. Oh yeah she was definitely pissed. "Actually you know what I'll call you later when you're a lot more level headed. I don't like talking to you when you get like this. I'll give you a call before I leave, maybe by then you'll have decided to grow up. Bye Allison"
Before I could muster a goodbye the line went dead. As if on cue Lou emerged from the bathroom. "Is that my toothbrush? I'm answered with a toothy grin and a not so sincere apology.
Making her way to the kitchen sink she spits before turning to me. "Its hard to break old habits." Shrugging her shoulders bashfully.
"Yeah, you had that horrible habit when we were together. In fact I remember trying to break it then as well." I was already on edge because of my argument with Mari and it only amplified as an instant rush of memory's exploded in me. Shared experiences, shared secrets, shared fears; days of exploring our worlds, nights of exploring each other.
At one point and time id be welcomed to Lou's witty quips and sultry looks over something as mundane as breakfast. There'd been a time were she had consumed my every waking thoughts before all of this. Before we'd reached the point of no longer caring to cover lies and spare truths. I shake my head furiously in disapproval, I needed to stay focus and reminiscing after fighting with my GIRLFRIEND wasn't making things any easier. Lou recognized the struggle of memory's on my face. Lou recognized everything and I'm sure she'd over heard Mari and I heated argument moments ago.
"I still think about it too. You know…. Before everything got all messy." Her gaze never falters as she shuffles lightly on her feet.
I have no words for her so I just trail back to my room praying Mariana will forgive me once she sees how much my truths really haunt me.
After breakfast I decided that a shower would help clear my mind. I had a full night of work was ahead of me; I wasn't needed at the rec center today and I would've been ecstatic about it if I didn't have a double shift at Snap & Go, Bev choosing today to cash in her IOU. I threw the thought of being any type of productive today out the window, I knew my mind would eventually start thinking up scenarios of how Mari and Zac's date were going. To top it of I had two paper's due by the beginning of next week and I hadn't even started my thesis for either one. No one could begin to understand how exhausted I was.
Freshly showered and standing in front of my mirror I shot a quick prayer to genetics. I hadn't gotten a full night of sleep in over a week yet there was no evidence of it. Since Mari and I had barely been able to see each other my cell phone bill had gone up tremendously. I would've been without said landline if my bill some how magically didn't get paid every month. Sitting on the edge of my bed I smiled to myself, it was overwhelming how accepting Lena and Stef could be. My mother had passed away many years ago and up until id met Callie; the only women in my life were usually sorry excuses for step moms or sleeping with me. Not exactly mommy material. The only parental figure I had in my life was my nonexistent father, who was more worried about his next trophy wife then his daughter.
My phone ringing breaks me out of my train of thought. "Hello?"
"Allison its Sean, your boss." His tone was overly iced. I don't know why he felt the need to announce his position as "bossman" every time he called. I'd worked at Snap & Go for almost two years now I was well aware of his job title. Even though technically Sean was just a supervisor. His father owned the store but Sean walked around as if it belonged to him. Actually he thought quite highly of himself; considering himself to be God's gift to earth and made sure you were aware of how lucky you were to be in his presence. A bit far fetched if you asked me.
"If this is about me calling out yesterday I'm sorry. But I had an emergency that needed my immediate attention." I hear ruffling in the background and my stomach turns at the thought of what exactly he may have been doing before he called me.
"No you got it covered although thirty minutes late is unacceptable. I was calling because I would be cutting your shift tonight. We hired a new girl and my father wants her trained by the end of next week, so as the boss I figured it was my responsibility to do so." His tone was even yet still held the vibe of creeper in it. This chick must be hot or else Sean would've pawned her off on one of us. Sean usually did nothing at work bringing an entire new meaning to the word lackey.
I instantly felt mercy for this girl. I knew what it felt like to be on the receiving end of Sean's not so welcoming advances. I would come home many nights washing the scum of his words off of me, he really had a hard time of understanding the word no; that was until I had a long talk with daddy. Something about an sexual harassment lawsuit in his future didn't sound appealing to the old man.
"Okay. Umm thanks for the heads up. Oh and Sean don't forget next week we have evaluations. I hope you realize all employees even new ones are allowed their opinion of staff and how management is handling the workload." That was my subtle way of telling Sean to take it easy. He knew I'd talk to Mr. Thilme if need be. I wasn't his biggest fan and I made sure he was mindful of that every chance I got.
"I know exactly what suppose to happen next week Allison. I am your superior, I do suggest you remember that." I could hear his irritation loud and clear, the man was really full of it. "I'm done here so we'll see you tomorrow, and try to make it on time. Like you said we do have evaluations next week." With this he hung up not waiting for a reply.
So my day in a matter of minutes had cleared. Any other time I would've called Mari planning a day to make up for all the other days I'd missed with my amazingly considerate girlfriend. But I was still upset with her. It was as if she continued to throw her and Zac's friendship in my face. She knew how he felt about her, hell he'd told her. I couldn't shake the feeling she was doing this to get a rise out of me. I knew I was being absolutely unjust about this. I had my ex girlfriend who I'd lived with and shared a bed with at one point and time staying with me. Ok scratch that I was being extremely petty about this. But I knew there was no way on earth I'd every cheat on Mariana. No matter how in love I'd been at one point and time with Lou. I couldn't see myself allowing something like that to happen. I also couldn't get the fact that Zac had already so boldly kissed Mari.
I exist my bed room in hopes that one fiery brunette had left to go about her day. I didn't want to deal with anyone, figuring I'd wallow in my own pity until dinner at the AdamFosters. Maybe I'd call Callie, try for a movie date or lunch. Well honestly just get details about this non date Mariana was going on with Zac. With no such luck I walked in my kitchen to find Lou tidying up.
"I know you were headed for work so I cleaned up a bit for you." She dried her hands on the green dish towel by the stove. The kitchen looked spotless and I began to remember how much of a neat freak Lou had always been. Maybe having her around wouldn't be such a bad idea, at least the place would be clean.
"Thanks but I don't work today so I would've gotten to it eventually." I rummage through the refrigerator more so for show then anything.
"You want to talk about?" Her eyes searched mines concern etched in her features.
We stare at each other for a minute before I give in and turn away walking over and plopping down on the sofa. "Not really, but if I don't ill go stir crazy because my girlfriend is out on a non date date with her ex boyfriend slash best friend if that makes sense." Leaning my head on the back of the sofa I hear laughter barreling from the kitchen.
"Your laughing at me? Really? I'm a big ball of self-pity and you decide to laugh at me?" My pout widens another indication that I was overreacting. She was seriously laughing at me.
"Still the irrationally jealous Allison I remember I see." Lou comes over and sits next to me on the couch. "I just find it funny that you've some how managed to forget you do have your ex girlfriend living with you. For the past few nights if I recall correctly, and I don't see Mariana accusing or knocking down any doors. Oh wait! I forgot she has no idea. Hmmm yea your right she's being completely untrustworthy by going and hanging out with her friend." Lou's perfectly sculpted eyebrows rise in a condescending manner, before she playfully shoves my shoulder.
I grab a pillow and try not so successfully to smother myself. Lou was right, absolutely without a doubt right. I was being a jerk about the entire thing. "Why do I have a feeling that your right and I'm being an ass about the situation?"
'Because I am and you are." Lou's grin was infectious.
"Ok so maybe just maybe I've pushed the panic button unjustly. But I don't like the way he looks at her. Or how he's knows things about her that I don't. Like her love for theater, I mean what guy do you know actually enjoys theater? I'm a girl and I can't sit thirty minutes through a play without counting sheep and ending in a deep sleep." Lou's staring at me with this incredulously look on her face.
"Did I say I don't like the way he looks at her?" I know my argument is dieing quickly but I feel I have a valid reason to worry.
Lou places her hand no my knee immediately ceasing my ranting. "I'm sure Mariana could argue the same thing. I bet she doesn't know about your massive fear of spiders. That when you were nine you broke your left kneecap trying to skate board off the roof of your house and only when its really cold the joint tends to lock up." Tucking my hair behind my ear Lou runs her finger along the side of my neck. "This little scar that is barely visible now happened on the one of few fishing trips you would go on with your father, a fishing hook gone array."
I knew I should look away but I couldn't Lou knew way too much about me. She knew everything and in this moment I couldn't deny the way her eyes were scanning over my every feature as if reacquainting herself with and old friend. The taste of blood invaded my mouth as I bite down on my lip. Something was happening and I was too frozen in place to stop it.
"How when your really nervous you chew on the inside of your lip." Lou's thumb lightly brushing against my bottom lip acknowledging my bad habit I'd had since I was a small girl. Before locking her eyes with mines.
Shaking my head I get up and head to the kitchen intending on rinsing out my mouth. I didn't have to see it to know Lou's eyes carried a bit of disappointment at my sudden withdrawal. "That's different Lou. We've known each other our entire lives." I clench the edge of the sink trying reel in the sudden wave of emotions in me.
"I'm not saying it's the same thing Allison." Exhaling sharply Lou walks over to the sink folding her arms cautiously around her chest while using the sink as leverage. "I'm saying that Zac was there before you and as much as you don't like it he experienced things with her that you weren't around to. Its not his fault it's just how life works. He'll always have memory's with her that don't include you and you need to get over that. Because what matters now is that she's with you. Your what's important. Your who she chooses to make memory's with now. So take pride in that. Besides I don't like this Allison. This sulking girl in front of me I don't know. It really does not look good on you." Lou flashes me her signature smile and wink jokingly pushing me with her hip while heading the restroom.
"Thank you." If I was being honest with myself Lou was right and more so it shocked me. She actually sounded as if she was on board with the idea of Mariana and I. Something I never thought I'd see coming from Lou. "You know for everything."
"No problem. Now if we're done with all the sentimental bonding we're going out. I just so happen to know of a concert that's happening right now by a certain person favorite band. I think radiohead is what their called."
My smile turns blinding. "You didn't!"
"I did." Was all I heard before the door was shut.
This day was turning out to be quite interesting. I knew I'd have to talk to Mariana later but I'd prefer to after her outing with Zac. And this concert seemed like a great way to clear my head.
So big blow out between Alliana! I have quite a few ideas of where I'd like this story to go. I may have deviated a bit from my original plan but I think you guys will like the change. I will write more soon. I've finally been able to get a bit of time off. So prepare for the fireworks and wars!