One week, Jim's mind still couldn't comprehend the changes, up until one week ago we lived this peaceful existence. I thought I'd lost my lover, my wife to some illness I couldn't do anything about and it made me feel so helpless, powerless over our fate.

She's pregnant, it sounded like an accusation in Jim's mind. Trixie's with child. We've got a bun in the oven. No matter how you look at it we've been completely irresponsible given the situation. Our peace has been shattered by a truth both of us suspected had to happen with the amount of time we're spending alone in this Hell Hole. Why did we have start sleeping together when we knew the consequences, no matter how careful we've been?

Sighing deeply, a habit he'd taken to recently, Jim attempted to stop the incriminations running through his head. He couldn't, they consumed him day and night. Watering the plants reminded him of the essence he'd poured into Trixie, in to his wife every time they shared their passion for each other. He hated his weakness, his giving in to his biological and hormonal needs.

I should have known better, he mind refused to stop. Watching the tins containing their winter garden, the train of thought came unbidden. Like a seed, we planted our child in fertile soil and it sprouted. Before we know, it'll be time to harvest it. Then what are we going to do? I don't know the first thing about babies or how to care for them. I'm so frightened. Scared I won't be able to cope with such monumental changes. Concluding this to be entirely his fault, Mr James Winthrop Frayne's anger wouldn't stop building as he continued to mount the blame squarely on his shoulders.

The day passed in which he didn't say another word to Trixie. His look said enough. You wanted me to face the White Elephant, Trixie, it accused, now you have to live with the consequences.

That night, instead of cuddling up, they lay back to back. Until this morning, Jim managed to ignore the issue, to overlook the slight swelling in his wife's belly. No longer able to deny the truth, he couldn't allow himself to touch her or he'd be too weak to stop at a single caress. Although he knew the damage to be done, Jim waited until Trixie slept before going to his bed. Finding it easier to disregard his need to be close, he lay down. Sleep didn't come easily or quickly as his mind continued to accuse him.

The chasm between them open, it deepened and became wider as the days past. Jim felt the bond erode with each recriminating look or lack of an intimate gesture. A week after their argument, his temper finally reached boiling point. Looking around the Hell Hole to establish Trixie's position, he became deathly still.

Crouched beside the stream, Trixie looked deeply into her reflection as though it could answer all her questions. Dressed in her BWG jacket and jeans, she started wearing clothes again. He missed seeing her naked body and the closeness it generated between them. The protective layer provided yet another barrier between them.

Shriving, not from the cold, at least not the temperature in the air, Trixie pulled the jacked closer in an attempt to get warm. Aware of Jim's scrutiny from the other side of the hole, Trixie realised her need came from the icy stares Jim levelled at her. Somehow those gazes, once heating her blood to boiling with a need for her husband, turned into shivers of apprehension. Now, a single look from Jim turned her blood to ice in her veins and made her feel worthless, cheap and abandoned.

Trying to understand his point of view became difficult as he continued the silent treatment. This is not all my fault, Trixie lamented for perhaps the millionth time, it takes two to tango. I didn't set out to get pregnant and I didn't do it by myself. If only Jim would come over here, sit down beside me and we could talk about it. Jim's the one who's always said we need to communicate because we only have each other and I need to talk about this. The moment a BIG problem hits us, he turns inward and refuses to face it.

Feeling depressed, she'd refused to help in any way, leaving Jim to do all the chores. Strangely, since they'd discovered her pregnancy, Trixie became listless. All her energy seemed to be consumed coping with the negative vibes, both emanating from Jim and internally created. Just as Jim blamed himself for the situation, as he discovered his fear, so too Trixie uncovered hers.

As each day past, she'd notice new changes to her body. The slight queasiness she felt most mornings but couldn't understand cleared up. The occasional bout of light headedness she attributed to her June head cold ceased. Trixie's belly expanded beyond her ability to wear her jeans without the fly button open. Occasionally she felt a slight fluttering, like butterfly wings against her naval.

Wanting to share this with Jim, the abandonment increased her trepidation. Reproachful looks caused Trixie to keep her physical distance from her husband. Pretending to sleep at night, more tears came as Jim lay beside her, not touching her, ridged in his anger. That more than any other action bespoke is disappointment to Trixie.

I wish you were here Moms, she silently cried, no longer able contain her tears during the day. Then Trixie remembered a stray thought from early in their enforced captivity. Spending almost every waking moment in each other's company, Trixie's understanding of his character improved. Patient, tenacious and careful, people assumed Jim's temper to be quick, because of his colouring. It wasn't even close to the truth. Jim simmered for a long time before finally losing emotional control. When he did, James Frayne became contrite almost immediately, disappointed with himself at his expression of internal irritation. Trixie wondered how much of his personality came from the years he'd spent under the supervision of his stepfather. The realisation hit her as suddenly as the memory assaulting her conscious. Understanding Jim's dilemma didn't make it any easier to cope with, or easier to forgive.

I need you now, Jim, Trixie silently cried, and I need you to need me. You have to come to me of your own free will or this is a hurdle we won't be able to surmount and our relationship…we won't be able to salvage what's left.

Jim, watching the play of emotions across Trixie's face, suddenly stopped his internal recriminations. His heart took a beat of two more before the expression of loss and disappointments on Trixie's face finally registered. I'm angry, so angry, but not at you, Trixie, Jim realised he hadn't told her. I can't believe I'm falling back into old habits the moment an issue I can't solve comes up. Did my time with Jonesy affect me more than I've ever realised and I'm still carrying around the scars? I've been so self-absorbed, so self-centred, can you ever forgive me Shamus.

The moment of clarity changed Jim's life forever. Forcing his feet to move, he started toward the woman he loved. The sorrow in every step asked forgiveness. Feeling the change in the atmosphere, Trixie looked up. Instantly she felt the change in him, between them. Blue eyes accepted the unstated apology.

Scooping her into his arms, Jim carried Trixie into the sleeping cave. Unable to stop, he lay down with her, cradling her body. Entwined, they promised to talk later. For now, this closeness, the intimacy, the desire to loose themselves in each other took over. Closing the gap, Trixie's lips touched Jim's. His tongue immediately demanded entry. Her clothes soon disregarded as hands stroked, pleasured, demanded the divide separating them be closed for ever.

Their passion didn't take long to satisfy. In the afterglow, Jim spooned his wife's body, fingers entwined and resting on Trixie's ever expanding belly. Laying a gentle kiss on her golden locks, he pulled her closer.

'I'm sorry,' he stated mournfully.

'I know,' Trixie answered. 'Don't ever do that to me again, Jim.'

'I can't make that promise,' he replied honestly. 'I thought that part of my life no longer affected us. It's taken this to realise I'm not as healed as I thought.'

'Yes,' Trixie gently reprimanded, 'you have healed from the shame. It's your behaviour that's still affected. How you cope with fear and resentment caused you to treat me horribly and that affected us. You said we needed to talk to each other. I need you to tell me how you feel, Jim or at least your thoughts. If we can't communicate, our relationship suffers. I've felt so abandoned, so worthless, as if you blame me for this situation when we did this together.'

Levering himself onto one arm, Jim towered above her. 'I'm angry at the situation, Trix,' he confessed, 'not you. Your…our pregnancy scared the life out of me. What if something happens to you? I…I couldn't face life down here without you. Without professional help we've no idea if there will be any complications? What if no one comes to rescue us in time? How are we going to cope with a child?'

'I wish I could talk to Moms,' Trixie mourned the loss of her parent, now more than ever. 'While she might be angry with us, at least Moms has experience with these things.'

'This is my entire fault,' Jim didn't know how to stop, even though he wanted too, desperately. 'If I could stop blaming myself, my lack of control, my inability to protect you, I wouldn't have pushed you away. I never meant too.'

'Jim,' rebuked Trixie, 'stop, stop it right now. We're in this together. We'll cope with whatever happens, as a team. That's what being married is all about. Don't think of your mother's second marriage and all the bad things that happened. Try to remember how your parents and mine might cope with this.'

Nodding he returned to his position at her back. 'I think your parents did,' Jim attempted to recall the story.

'They had each other,' Trixie reminded, 'and three children in three years. Mom coped, not easily or without problems, but she coped. I never heard my father once complain because he loves Moms and he always said, with love you can conquer anything.'

'You really believe that, Trix,' Jim asked in an astounded tone.

'I've loved you enough from the day I met you,' she answered in a level voice, 'to know we'd be able to weather anything if you felt the same way about me.'

'I've haven't lived up to your expectation so far,' the words out before Jim's conscious managed to filter them.

'You're here with me now,' Trixie commented, a smile on her face for the first time in two weeks. 'The rest we'll work out. We did this together, Jim. This child is part of me and part of you, our responsibility.'

Stroking her belly, Jim felt a calmness he'd rarely felt descend. Green eyes looked past the physical realm, into Trixie's soul. 'I know our son's going to be just like his mother.'

'How do you know it's not going to be a girl,' Trixie asked, stunned by his sudden capitulation. She still felt frightened by the massive task before her, yet the burden she'd been under this last week lifted, making Trix feel lighter. Sharing her problems, their problems and reservations, didn't make them magically disappear, just easier to cope with.

'I just know,' Jim smiled, 'and we're going to name him James Winthrop Frayne III.'

'We are?' the sarcasm in Trixie's voice tempered with delight at the change in his attitude. Jim's hand stroking her belly made its way lower, helping ease the tension left between them. 'Don't I get a say, after all I'm the one carrying this baby for nine months.'

'Not in this,' Jim laughed, finding the erogenous zone his finger sort. 'A father has to have some privileges, but we'll use the pet name you give him.'

'I think we'll call it,' Trixie teased, closing her eyes at the pleasure created so quickly. She'd missed this, missed Jim's easy sexuality and her response to it. They'd become incredible compatible, understanding the others needs with only a glance. 'Jamie, that way if it's a girl you won't be disappointed.'

'As long as this child is ours,' Jim stated vehemently, halting his ministrations. Moving to roll Trix onto her back, he placed her into the position he need to continue his physical assault on her body. 'I'll never be disappointed. I'm not going to pretend I wanted you all to myself for a few years before this happened. Now it has, I've made my peace, Trix.'

'Good,' Trixie's eyes held that look he loved, 'and now we don't have to stop twice a month to be careful, you've got a couple weeks to make up for.'

'My pleasure,' Jim's voice became muffled. His tongue darted out to kiss the most sensitive spot between her lower lips. Allowing her hands to tangle in his long heir, Trixie relaxed, enjoying the makeup session. Feeling melded to her husband, she wondered if the last two weeks had been a bad dream.

Reading her mind, Jim did that thing with his long, subtle fingers she loved. 'I'm never going to let something like this get between us again,' he promised before returning to his self-appointed task. This time, Jim promised, too taken by his mission to tell her in words, it's all about you, Trix, all for you. By the time I'm finished you'll be boneless with pleasure to make up for all the hurt we've gone through. I'm going to take it so slow, neither one of us will know where we finish and the other starts.