Hey Guys! Sorry I'm one day late on posting but i am very busy. To answer some of the reviews Forever1918- Edward doesn't understand what Bella is on about because he still thinks that what he did was good for Bella and that she finally got herself a man and she was pregnant, so Edward as always assumes that she's happy and has no reason to be mad. Twilightteamjake- yes Jacob will be in this like next chapter. Ok so enjoy this chapter it's a rubbish one. Ha ha, it really is but i'll write a better one next week. Also thanks for everybody's reviews.

The next few weeks were empty. There was nothing, no joy, no sadness, no emotion. Once the baby had been gotten rid of I just lay on my hospital bed. I ate, I drank and I slept. A lot. Somehow losing this baby made me lifeless, I was hoping for some tears but nothing. Yet I felt sickened that I didn't miss it, however I had an excuse I didn't know what I was missing. I didn't think of Edward because I didn't want to remember my past.

I had not told Nick about the baby just yet because I didn't want to have that kind of conversation over the phone.

"Bella?" I was pulled out of my dreaming state by a familiar voice on a Friday afternoon. I looked up and saw my nurse, Michelle standing on the right side of my bed.

"Yeah?" I whispered, I hadn't spoken for days. Michelle smiled due to my progress.

"Sweetie, Doctor Cullen told me that if you had a visitor to not ask him for visitation rights but to ask you," Michelle explained and I was fascinated how well Carlisle knew what I wanted "and well this lady called Loraine is outside."

"Loraine! She can come in." I replied. Loraine and I had met during my first year at Matthews Co. and she kindly took me under her wing.

Flashback

I was standing in the queue to pay for my cheesecake and coke when the guy behind me pushed me forward when I started my usual day dreaming. Me being me, I tripped the cheesecake flew onto the lady in front of me and the coke spilling all over my trousers.

"Oh my god! I am so so so sorry! I didn't mean to do that! I'm so sorry, I can pay for the blouse, here let me help you." I said and started scraping the cake off her back when she turned around and faced me. I half expected her to start screaming at me when instead she smiled and said:

"Oh nonsense, don't worry about it. I have thousands of these blouses. I was planning to throw this one away anyway. But, look at you do you have spare trousers?" she wondered and I simply shook my head to no. "Well come on I think you're about my size so I may have something that will fit you." She led me to her office and handed me a pencil skirt I was shocked. Yes, Loraine was about the same height and size as me but she had more curves than I did. Her looks could also challenge a supermodel. She had blonde hair with chocolate brown lowlights, her eye colour was simply amazing the only way you could describe them was electric green. She had a smile that you see in toothpaste adverts and long French manicured nails. She was born to wear skirts where as I was born to be…well scruffy. After I had changed and Loraine had found herself a new blouse we talked till the end of lunch. I found out that Loraine was only four years older than me and had started out just where I was at the time. Loraine was married and was on the way to ultimate success. She wasn't making me talk a lot so I was very comfortable around her and when I did talk and told her I was new to New York she immediately insisted that she would show me the ropes and I was more than happy to accept and have someone who knew what they were doing by my side.

End of Flashback

Loraine helped me make a mark on Matthews Co. and helped me through when times got tough. She also had helped Angela land her first job. Loraine was a great friend to both Angela and I, so I was more than positive that Angela had told Loraine about the accident.

"Hey Sweetie." Loraine's soft voice floated into the room as she walked in.

"Hey Loraine." I smiled and Loraine came over and wrapped her arms around me in a secure hug.

"Honey, Angela called. I heard about the baby," Loraine pulled me away from her and looked at my reaction to the word 'baby' and when no waterworks went off she asked "How are you?"

"I'm surviving." I sighed.

"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry. I know how happy you were due to the baby."

"You know it's weird, now that I don't have the baby, I somehow don't miss it. I mean I do…but it's just that I never knew if it was a boy or a girl so I didn't feel that connected to it. I barely had a stomach. That little person was meant to be protected by me. It was MY job to look after him. Loraine….how….I'm a…..terrible….person." I sobbed into Loraine's shoulder and clung onto her for dear life.

"Shh…Shhh," Loraine tried to calm me whilst rocking me like I was a little child "Bella you are a wonderful person. Your kind and supportive. You couldn't save the baby. Nobody could. Bella this wasn't your fault. You did everything you possibly could. Honey, it just wasn't meant to be." Loraine comforted me. "Have you told Nick?" Loraine knew me too well.

"No…I….just couldn't!....Not on…..the phone." I sobbed more and Loraine started drawing shapes on my back to calm me.

"I understand. When does he get back?"

"Tomorrow…I….have no….idea…how to-how to," my hysterics increased "tell him."

"Honey, it's alright. But you need Nick right now, he lost the baby too." Loraine explained and I felt truly blessed to have Loraine. She was the one person who I would trust to tell her about Edwards little visit.

"Loraine.." I said once I had calmed down enough to speak.

"Sweetie, I know…" Loraine insisted even though she really didn't know.

"Loraine…Do you remember Angela telling you about a certain family in Forks?" I asked, knowing that Angela had told her about them.

"What family?" Loraine played dumb.

"Look I know she told you about the Cullens and I have also told you that a family was my reason for leaving Forks."

"Fine, she told me about them, but don't be mad at her."

"Loraine, I'm not angry."

"Oh…So why the topic?"

"Well…the Cullens have three adopted sons, the youngest son…" I told Loraine the whole story about what had happened back in Forks and how Edward had turned up at the hospital couple of days ago. Loraine just sat there and listened. After I had told her about almost everything, she needed a zombie minute after that had passed she asked:

"But how did he find you?"

"Loraine look at my chart." I told her. She walked to the foot of my bed and took the chart in her hands.

"Now what?" She asked.

"Look at the name of my doctor." I ordered her.

She exhaled with annoyance but listened. After about 5 seconds her eyes averted away from the chart back to me. I noticed her mouth was hanging open.

"Doctor C. Cullen?"

"Yes Loraine, Edwards's dad is my doctor."

"Wait so he just told his son about you?" Loraine looked and sounded outraged.

"No-no! He probably told his youngest daughter Alice and she must have told Edward." I made an excuse and reclined against my pillow. After two minutes she asked:

"So what was it like seeing him again?"

"I don't really know, I was a little busy so to speak."

"Yea, but now that you have had time to think about it?"

"It was weird, he hadn't changed much and the amount of will power that I had was amazing. But it still hurt." I whispered the last part.

Loraine left three hours leaving me in piece to sit around and think how I would tell Nick tomorrow morning. After I had just about had enough of the guilty thoughts floating around in my head I reached over to the light switch and turned the lights off. I lay my head down on the pillow closed my eyes and drifted asleep. The next morning I woke up after having a horrible nights sleep. It was seven a.m. and I was still exhausted so I walked over to the bathroom and took an extra long bath. Once I was ready I stepped out and put on fresh pair of trackies and a polo. I tied my hair into a loose ponytail and walked out into my room and sat down on my bed. The clock showed that it was eight thirty. Oh great Nick was going to be here in less than two hours. At that point Kelly the young nurse walked in with a worried look on her face.

"Miss Swan, a Mister Matthews is here and is demanding I let him see you."

What? He's not meant to get here for another two hours. Oh god what am I going to do?" I panicked.

"Miss Swan are you okay? Should I call Doctor Cullen?" Kelly asked.

"No, I'm just fine no need to do that! Just let mister Matthews in." I told her but she didn't look convinced. "Trust me." She rolled her eyes but went to get Nick.

My stomach started to do double flips and it felt like I was going to faint.

Come on Bella you can do it. There's nothing to be scared of. Nick is here for you, he will be. The baby was his as well.

"Bella!" Nick cried and ran over to my bed grabbed me off the bed and swung me around. Once his arms had encircled me all of my held up emotions had had enough and I began crying. "Bella? Did I hurt you?" Nick looked horrified.

"No." I sniffed.

"Baby what's wrong?" Nick's eyes were fixated on my eyes and I felt like I didn't want to give him the bad news.

"I think you might want to sit down." I said and Nick looked worried.

"Bella what's wrong?" He asked.

"Just please sit down." I insisted.

"Bella.."

"Nick. I told you to sit down." I growled. This time Nick listened and sat down without saying a word.

"Nick when the accident happened, I had stomach pains which I am sure that doctor Cullen told you of," I prayed that he would not be able to connect the mysterious Cullens I never talked about to Carlisle "But umm… and a couple days later I got the same pains, only they were worse…"

"Is the baby okay?" Nick interrupted but I didn't let that influence me.

"…So after the cramps got worse, I bled…"

"Damn it! Bella what happened to the baby?"

"I miscarried." I whispered.

"You lost my baby?" Nick's eyes reflected only one emotion. Hate.

"I…wait. What?" I was speechless.

"How could you be so irresponsible?" He practically screamed.

"I didn't do anything." I said as I felt tears of rage gather in my eyes. How dare he accuse me of losing the baby on purpose?

"Yea like I believe that. You know pregnant women are not supposed to drive." He yelled.

"It's not like I was eight months along. Women who are four months pregnant can drive." I was in tears and yelling back at Nick.

"It looks like you couldn't drive. Maybe you weren't pregnant?" He accused.

"Wow, that's low. Of course I was pregnant, you saw the picture. No actually you were there when we heard the heartbeats." I sobbed.

"Well then what was your master plan? Were you planning on getting all of my family's money through the baby?"

"WHAT?! I never would do that. Nick there was no master plan. I was having this baby so that we could be happy; you were the one asking when we would have children."

"Oh please, spare me the melodramatics; maybe it is good you lost the baby. It would have had you for a mother. You can't even take care of yourself." Nick spat.

"What did you just say?"

"You heard me. The baby wasn't even probably mine. Tell me who's Edward?"

"Excuse me?"

"Oh stop playing such an idiot. You know as well as I do that you cheat on me."

"I never did such a thing."

"Okay so tell me why, when you fell asleep in my arms would you some night scream 'Edward don't leave' or moan Edwards's name. Come on if you were brave enough to be a slut just say so."

"Believe it or not but I have never cheated."

"Bella, you're a slut and the only way you could be accepted into any classy society was to get yourself a top bachelor, you got me. Stop pretending bitch." He snarled.

"You never wanted me." I choked.

"No I did want you. On the first date. After I first slept with you, I told my parents about you and how I wanted to break it off but my mum asked to meet you. When you met my parents they loved you so I got the idea of trying to fall in love with you. And I did. But I didn't know that you were such a whore."

"I AM NO SUCH THINGS! I'M SORRY I LOST YOUR BABY, BUT YOU HAVE NO RIGHT SAYING STUFF LIKE THAT. ACCUSING ME FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU HAVE DONE AND BY THE WAY I WOULD HAVE BEEN A GREAT MOM. HELL I WOULD HAVE BEEN A GREAT WIFE AND YOU KNOW WHAT ONE DAY I WILL BE AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT HOW BAD MY LIFE HAS RECENTLY GOTTEN BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH MORE. I AM HAPPY I DISCOVERED YOU WERE INHUMANE BEFORE I MARRIED YOU."

"Oh you are going to marry me. This can't get out to the press and we can just get you pregnant again, but the lovers will go. Or else..." Nick threatened me. This was the very first time I felt scared of Nick and his eyes reminded me so much of James's.

"Firstly I don't have a lover. Edward is a Cullen, yea the family I never talk about. Secondly I am not going to have a child with you, ever again. I would never let a child suffer because of its father. And thirdly I WONT MARRY YOU." I said and wrenched off my engagement ring and threw it across the room.

"How dare you," He slapped me and I screamed from pain "bitch that ring is worth over half a million dollars." He slapped me again. "Wait until I tell my father."

"Don't worry I told him already, and he was supportive and said I did nothing wrong. Maybe you should be more like your father." I spat and another slap was about to contact with my right cheek but a pale white hand stopped it.

"I think it's better if you leave now." Carlisle snarled.

"Who the fuck are you?" Nick roared.

"I'm a very dangerous person, now if you don't get out of here right now, trust me you will not see daylight again. Don't ever threaten Bella, don't search for her, and don't dare try and get her fired or set everyone against her because if you do, I will personally shred you to pieces." Carlisle had never looked as dangerous.

"Why the fuck should I give a crap about your warnings?" Nick laughed.

"Because if you don't, you will regret it."

"And if you think of trying to sue me for harassment I will dig up the darkest secrets you have."

"I don't have secrets." Nick smiled menacingly.

"Everybody has secrets. Now leave." Carlisle answered and I think that Nick believed him. Nick stormed out before any of Carlisle's threats would come true.

"Bella are you okay?" he asked after my heart had slowed down.

"Carlisle I have to get out of here." I muttered.

"Bella you cannot possibly go now." Carlisle announced.

"Carlisle please, I need to go." I begged.

"Okay, I will get you out of here and drive you to the airport and you can go where you want to from there." Carlisle promised.

In less than thirty minutes I was sitting in the waiting area ten minutes away from boarding the plane to get me out of New York.

Destination: Seattle. I was going home.

Well there we go. Please don't hate me! This chapter was bad, i know but i have had no time to perfect it. My older sister is getting married in like two weeks so i have been at my parents house and i am just really stressed. Next chapter will be better i swear well actually from this chapter there is only up :D review on how crappy it was :D Love Anna x