October 1984

He was fifteen and sitting with Jonathan and Will. He was now a high school sophomore and nearing the end of his first semester. They were sitting together, Jonathan and Will poring over a comic that Ross had bought for his birthday. He glanced at it but his attention was elsewhere. Lately, he had been feeling bored and he wasn't sure why. He wanted to go do something, anything. He wanted to see what was outside of Long Island. Around him, things were the same. Rachel was acting mean in public but nice in private. Monica was still….Monica. There was a fall formal coming up but he didn't particularly care about that. It was a formal, a dance. He had no girlfriend. He could ask someone, but the girl he would contemplate asking would say no before he even got the question out. Ever since that dance at Monica's Bat Mitzvah, he could not stop thinking about Rachel. She was now being featured prominently in all the comics, much to the dismay of Will and Jonathan. He saw her as she walked into the cafeteria with Chip Matthew's arm draped around her shoulders. Chip was Rachel's current crush and/or boyfriend. He wasn't quite sure. Rachel was laughing at something Nancy was saying to her. Mindy and Sharon waved them towards their table and they walked past Monica, ignoring her. Monica's friend, Ellie rolled her eyes as Monica simply shook her head.

"Dude, are you even paying attention?" Will asked.

"No. What?" Ross asked.

"What's going on with you, man?" Jonathan asked.

"Just thinking. I'm bored. I wanna do something," Ross said.

"Like what? The formal is coming up. That'll be fun," Will said.

"We went last year and there's another formal next semester and it's all so dumb and it's not like any girl would go with us," Ross said.

"I'm thinking of asking Monica's friend, Laurie. She's cute," Will said.

"You know, I know of this guy who lives in Queens and he throws these giant house parties. People show up from everywhere. We could be cool for the night," Jonathan grinned.

"It's a magic party?" Ross asked.

"We're cool," Will said.

"Dude. we're sitting at a table by ourselves surrounded by comic books. We're not cool," Ross said.

"We could go. These parties are apparently legendary and the family that owns the house? Rumor has it, they have ties to the mob," Jonathan said.

"Seriously?" Ross asked.

"There's also this really cool music place I've wanted to try. It's twenty one and over, we may need fake ID's but it might be fun.. It could be an adventure," Jonathan said.

"I want an adventure. I wanna see Manhattan and Queens," Ross said. He was starting to get an itch, wanting to see what else was out there for him. High school was starting to bore him. He got straight A's and was in all advanced courses. High school seemed filled with all the same nonsense that he just didn't care about. He didn't understand why Rachel needed to lie about herself to fit in or why Monica cared so much about all the drama and girls being mean. He just wanted to do other things and maybe this could be it.

Of course, it would require a lot of sneaking around. His parents would definitely not approve. He told them he was going into the city with Jonathan and Will. He told them he was going to a seminar at the Natural History Museum. They let him go. He had a feeling they would. They trusted him. He was still their golden child. So the three boys got on the train and took it to Manhattan, first to the club that Jonathan had recommended. It was called Sidewalks and there was live music, amazing music. He was a little stunned when they got in although he knew he looked older than fifteen. The fake ID's Jonathan had gotten for them got them access into Sidewalks and they found a table near the front.

"Now, let's see if we can get beer," Will said, getting up.

"Wait," Ross said, pulling out his wallet and giving him some cash. Before leaving, he had gotten a lot of the Bar Mitzvah money he had. The Bar Mitzvah money that had not been taken by the mugger and put it in his wallet, "we can't use credit cards."

"Why not?" Will asked.

"'Cause our parents pay those," Ross said.

"Oh yeah, good point," Will said, taking the cash from Ross and walking off towards the bar.

"This is awesome," Ross said.

"I know. I love this city."

"Wouldn't it be cool to be in a band," Ross mused.

"It would. I bet Two-Face would be your groupie," Jonathan said.

"Yeah, but privately. I couldn't talk to her in public."

"The best groupies are private ones."

"True. She's cute though. I know Will hates her but…."

"You really do like her?"

"I can't stop thinking about her. She's just weird and fake and….two faced."

"I got beer," Will said walking back with three bottles of beer. Ross grabbed a bottle and opened it. He brought it to his lips and cringed a little at the taste of the alcohol. He didn't love it but it felt very adult. The music began, a guy sitting at the keyboards began playing and it hit him. He wondered what it would be like. He could learn how to play the keyboards? He could add another part to his personality. He could add it to college applications? He would be leaving Long Island, he had already made that decision. He wanted out of suburbia.

"I want to start a band," Ross said.

"What?" Will asked.

"In addition to the comic books?" Jonathan asked.

"Yeah. Wouldn't it be cool? We'll be scientists who also are rockers like Culture Club and stuff…" Ross mused. It would be cool. In his head, he could imagine playing on stage. Rachel sitting in front, watching him. Smiling, maybe. She wouldn't be embarrassed to talk to him in public, she'd be happy to be with him.

He could imagine sitting with her, talking with her, dating her but she was so wrapped up in herself, in her secrets and lies. Her persona which he just could not understand. Why did it mean so much to her to keep it up? It made him sad that she didn't see what he saw.

After the concert, which was inspiring, they headed to that house party in Queens. He had never been to Queens even though it was only about an hour from his house. The house was on a long street and the cab stopped about a mile from the house. It was too packed. The street was too packed, too busy. He was amazed, he had never seen that many people in his life. Every single person seemed to be drinking or recovering from drinking.

"Oh my G-d," Ross said.

"Dude, there's a cop car," Will pointed and sure enough, there was a cop car cruising down the street and oblivious to the fact that there were people losing complete control, people who were clearly underage.

"Weird," Ross said.

"It's not. Rumor has it, they paid off the cops to ignore the party. You could basically have sex in the street and it wouldn't matter," Jonathan said.

"Why would you have sex in the street?" Ross asked.

"Some people are into that kind of thing," Jonathan said.

"We should pretend we're other people," Will said. "I mean who knows us?"

"Oooo, we can be like superheroes," Ross said. "Guys with fake identities. I wanna be James Bond."

"You can't be James Bond. That's too obvious," Jonathan said.

"Alright, I am….Richard Burke," Ross said.

"Michelle Burke's dad?" Will asked.

"Yep," Ross said.

"But he's got a mustache," Will said.

"Yeah, but I could pretend I have one. I mean, I don't have one….besides he's a doctor. Doctor Burke….to the rescue," Ross said.

"And you're an eye doctor so you can be like, "I am looking into your eyes and I can see into your soul and it moves me….and makes me ache. Let me be in you, in your eyes," Jonathan said.

"Whoa….I'm gonna get laid," Ross mused as the three boys made their way through the crowds until they finally reached the house where the party was. Standing in the doorway, holding a beer, was a very handsome boy wearing a tight white shirt and even tighter jeans. He was ushering people into the house and grinning at everyone.

"Hey, how you doin'? I'm Joey, welcome….we got girls, we got beer, we got hard stuff. We got weed, if you're interested. If you're a cop, we don't got weed and I'm twenty one," the guy grinned from ear to ear.

"We're not cops," Will said.

"That's awesome 'cause I'm not twenty-one," Joey said.

"Um….I'm...I'm Richard Burke," Ross said, slowly. "And these are my buddies….Brad Jolie-" Ross said pointing to Will, "and Tag Ferguson," pointing towards Jonathan. Joey seemed deeply amused by Ross' introductions.

"You sure?" Joey asked.

"Yes, yes," Ross said.

"Alright, I don't give a crap. Go on in. My buddy, Shane will hook you up with some good stuff. My uncle got some illegal shit from South of the Border," Joey said, ushering them inside where there were more people.

"Tag Ferguson?" Jonathan asked.

"I couldn't think of anything," Ross said.

"Better than Tag?" Jonathan asked. "Who the hell names their child Tag?"

"I don't know. Maybe we can change it and Tag could be your last name and….and your first name could be….freeze," Ross said, laughing at his own joke.

"For a fake doctor, you're an idiot," Jonathan said.

"It's 'cause I don't really have the mustache," Ross said. "That's where all his power is."

"It's a new comic book hero," Will said.

"Mustache Man. By day, he checks your eyes and by night-"

"He steals them?" Ross asked, finishing Jonathan's thought.

"No. That's why I do the writing," Jonathan said.

"If I learn to play the keyboards,, I can do the theme song to our comic book heroes. We have a series that could rival Marvel or D.C.. Science Boy, Mustache Man, Two-Face…..we are brilliant people," Ross said.

"Do you think it's weird that we are standing in the middle of a house party discussing comic books?" Will asked.

"I'm gonna say yes…..but what are we supposed to do?" Ross asked.

"I think we're supposed to talk to people," Jonathan said.

"This was your idea, Ross. You had the idea to have an adventure and be crazy and stuff. So what do we do?" Will asked.

"I think Jonathan's right. We talk to people. Girls. Let's talk to girls. We don't really do that enough."

"We really don't. Okay, so let's talk to girls," Jonathan said as the stood in the middle of the room, people walking around them, not paying much attention. Ross looked back at Joey, standing by the door. Joey was now standing with a very well-endowed red-headed girl. He had his arm around her waist and seemed to be engrossed in….well, not conversation, but something else. Ross decided he would try. He really hadn't talked to many girls other than Rachel and his sister did not count. He took a deep breath and stepped forward. There was a pretty brunette standing by herself, sipping from a red plastic cup. He walked over to her, hoping that she did not see the shaking.

"Hi...hello...hi….how...how you doin'?" Ross asked and the girl gave him a strange look.

"Hi?"

"Hey...yeah, I'm….my name is um, Richard Burke."

"Oh my G-d, that's my uncle's name," the girl said.

"Yeah, but I don't have a mustache," Ross said.

"What?" The girl asked.

"Nothing."

"You know what, I think I see my friend. I'll talk to you later," the girl said as she walked off, quickly. Ross let that sink in as he turned around to look at Will and Jonathan. He walked back towards them.

"Yeah...we're gonna meet up later," Ross said.

"We should be better at this. We're creative," Jonathan said.

"I have movie star good looks, at least that's what my mom says," Will said.

"Why can't we be like the guy at the door. He's got four girls," Ross said, pointing to Joey who was now standing with four different girls, each on him in some way, kissing him, touching him, stroking him. "Come on, man….share."

"You know what though? I bet that's not very fulfilling. I bet he's not very happy," Jonathan said.

"He looks plenty happy to me," Will said.

As Ross stood there, he started feeling less and less comfortable. He wanted an adventure. He wanted to be away from Long Island, but now he kinda wanted to go back or at the very least away from this house with people who were just too out of control. He turned and began to walk towards the front door with Will and Jonathan following close behind.

"Whoa, where you going?" Joey asked.

"Oh, thanks for the party. We're gonna head back home," Ross said.

"Did you see my buddy, Shane. He's got stuff. Good stuff," Joey said.

"Like what?" Will asked.

"Stuff," Joey said.

"Like?" Will asked.

"Is he joking?" Joey asked, looking at one of the girls hanging from him. Ross let out an annoyed snort. Maybe the adventure was a wrong thing.

"Dude, we're three comic book geeks from Long Island. You gotta be more specific," Ross said.

Joey let out a laugh and shook his head, "I like this kid."

"We should probably go," Jonathan said.

"Yeah. Thanks for the party," Ross said as the three stepped back and began walking down the street in hopes of getting a cab. He had such high hopes for the evening, he thought. He loved the music but the crazy party just annoyed him. It felt like a hyped up version of Fall Formal. Fall Formal but with booze.

They ended up back in Long Island late that night and at Scoops, the ice cream shop hang out. It was packed with classmates getting late night ice cream before heading home to meet curfews. The trio sat together at a table eating ice cream and discussing the evening.

"Are we really that geeky?" Will asked.

"Yes," Ross and Jonathan said together.

"We're pathetic," Will said.

"Well, it was a fun night. The music was awesome. We will have to start that band. I bet if we start a band, we will totally get girls. More than that Joey dude."

"The kid was a pimp…..I'm jealous."

Ross laughed as the three continued eating ice cream and reliving the night. It was fun to leave Long Island, it made him think of his future and of what he could do when he was done with high school. He would have to move to the city. That was item number one.

He would learn to play the keyboards, be in a band, go to college in the city and become a paleontologist and then he would have an easier time getting girls like that Joey guy who lived in the house and had the party but he would definitely not go to the Fall Formal. There was no need and it seemed Rachel would not be going either. A few days before the formal, he walked in on Monica on the phone with Rachel. Monica seemed rather upset as she hung up the phone and let out a loud sigh.

"What was that about?" He asked.

"It was Rachel. She got grounded. Olivia's was robbed."

"What?" Ross asked.

"Yeah. While she was working there, it was robbed. She was alone and thief or thieves took off with a lot of stuff."

"Oh. Oh...does-does she need me?" Ross asked, realizing how strange that sounded in his head. He was trying to keep it together.

"No. No, she's-she's grounded."

"Yeah, but that's terrifying. I mean, I was-I was mugged...I know how scary...what if what was the same person? The person who mugged me, robbed Rachel?"

"Why would a big burly dude want clothes for girls?"

"What?" Ross asked, sounding confused. What was she talking about?

"Big burly dude? You said a big burly dude mugged you? Why would a big, burly dude rob a store that sells clothes for girls? No money was taken. Only clothes."

"Oh, yeah...yeah, well maybe he has a daughter."

"Uh-huh. Okay, Ross were you mugged by a girl."

"No, I wasn't but I should go talk to Rachel. She needs...me...a friend."

"At school, she keeps calling you dumb ass."

Ross let out a sigh, he needed to be better at keeping his feelings secret. His feelings about Rachel. He didn't like that he couldn't stop thinking about her, about how to break through to her.

"It's 'cause...it's 'cause we're friends."

"Ahhhh. Ross?"

"What?"

"Do you like Rachel?" Monica asked.

"No."

"Ross."

"I don't."

"Okay...you know, she'd never go for a guy like you."

"You don't know. Well, it doesn't matter. I don't like her like that."

"Uh huh."

Ross turned and walked out of the room and towards the kitchen. He didn't like her like that. He didn't. He was trying not to. She was Two-Face. She was messed up, her whole attitude was messed up. She wouldn't care if he played music or became a doctor. She wanted other things.

News of the robbery at Olivia's spread like wildfire. Everyone was talking about it. Everyone was comforting Rachel as she cried in the cafeteria about how scary the robbery had been and what had been a simple story of someone shoplifting lots of clothes soon turned into what could only be described as the plot to a movie. Rachel had been held at gunpoint. She had been bound and gagged. She had been pistol whipped. She fought back against her attackers. She had kicked, bit, punched. By the end of the school day, the story took on a life of it's own and Rachel had gone from the victim of a shoplifter to a butt kicking bad ass which made her even more popular. Ross was secretly enjoying watching all this go down. It was like Rachel had turned into Two-Face.

The night of the formal, Monica left and he had decided to stick to his plan of not going. He knew Rachel wasn't going and he wondered if she would want to hang out. He called and was pleasantly surprised when she came over. He had ordered a pizza and the two were soon sitting on the couch, relaxing.

"So how are you?" Ross asked.

"I've been better," Rachel said.

"Did you really kick the robber guy in the nuts?" Ross asked.

"No."

"I couldn't see that."

"You never know….no, I was on the phone and when I was not looking, someone came in and ripped off the store and I got in a lot of trouble and now Chip is at the formal probably making out with Nancy or Mindy….or Sharon."

"Aren't those your best friends?" Ross asked, confused. Why did Rachel like those people?

"I guess...although, between us….I don't like them that much. I like Monica. I think she's my only real friend."

"What am I?"

"Ross. You're just Ross."

"I could be your friend."

"Maybe. I just...I feel….I don't know….l feel like I'm pretending a lot. That I'm lying a lot. I feel like everyone has this idea of who I am and I don't even know who I am."

"I get that," Ross said. He liked this side to Rachel. It was a side he had never seen. She was vulnerable with him.

"Can we watch a movie?" Rachel asked.

"Sure, what's your favorite and I'll see if I have it," Ross said, getting up.

"Terms of Endearment," Rachel said.

Ross sat back down and stared at her. Why would she lie about that "no, it's not."

"Yes, it is."

"No, no...no ones favorite movie is Terms of Endearment. You want to say that so people think you're deep. What's your actual favorite movie?"

Rachel smiled, "I-okay-I really liked Airplane."

"There you go."

"How do you know I'm not lying?"

"'Cause I thought you were lying before although I'm not sure why you had to lie in the first place."

"Well...'cause Airplane-"

"Is a great movie."

"It is."

"Then why can't you say that's your favorite movie?" Ross asked.

"Because...I've built up this persona, you know and the persona that I've built up wouldn't consider Airplane her favorite movie. I don't expect you to understand. You don't care what people think. I do, Ross and I want everyone to be happy and I want to please everyone and not get anyone upset which doesn't really work and I treat your sister like shit and I hate that because she's the bestest friend ever and I just...I don't know how to be myself and maybe that's why I'm always lying and saying that it's not me because I don't know who me is and everyone else seems to know."

"Well, figure out who you wanna be and if they don't like it, forget them."

"I don't know."

"Also, if Chip really cheats on you tonight then he is the world's biggest jerk. Who would cheat on you?"

"What?"

"Who would cheat on you? You're too nice."

"You think I'm nice?"

"I think you're very nice. Anyone who gets as emotional as you do about everything….and worries this much...yeah, you're nice."

"Thanks, Ross. You're nice too."

"I try."

"You know, on Monday, I'm gonna have to ignore you at school."

"I understand."

"No, you don't."

"No, I don't."

Rachel smiled at him as Ross stood up and walked towards the stack of movies and picked up Airplane and showed it to her. She smiled happily as he put in the VCR. He sat back down next to her as they began watching the movie.

"Why aren't you at the formal?" Rachel asked as Ross pressed pause.

"I didn't wanna go."

"No one to ask?"

"I went last year. I'll go next year. It's just a bunch of people standing around, drinking punch. It's not that important, Rach."

"It is to me."

"Why?"

"It just is. It's important. I like being liked. I wish I could not care but I care. Maybe one day I won't. It's not gonna be now."

"What if I had asked you. To Fall Formal….what if I asked you? Would you have said yes?" Ross asked, feeling almost fearless at the moment. Maybe it was his memory of going to the city and to those parties, but he felt fearless.

"No."

"Hmmm….so then maybe it's a good thing I didn't go."

"I'm not a bad person, Ross."

"I know."

"And….don't tell but I actually like this better than the dance."

"Me too."

Rachel smiled at him as he pressed play and they continued to watched. He liked being close to her, liked getting to know her and liked just being there with her. He knew it would all eventually end, but that moment would remain officially theirs.