Sasuke woke up still feeling full from Sakura's stupid fucking Midnight Feast. He'd dozed off on the recliner section of the sofa, and woken up early; Naruto was snoring on the carpet, and Sakura was curled up on the divan underneath a fleece blanket.

Well, two points in her favor, anyways: her kickass couch, and her scrumptious omelette.

He scoffed and stalked into his bathroom. He would actually never compliment her, whether it be in his head or verbally.

He turned the shower on nice and hot, like he wanted it, stripped off his clothes (he hated falling asleep in jeans) and stepped inside, letting the hot water soothe his stiff muscles.

Sakura was annoying already. This was a problem.

It wasn't like he cared about her or anything. To be quite honest, he thought she was kind of a bitch. What with her nasty, suspicious glares at him all the time and the way she always had some smartass comment to make to him, rather than just shut her (pretty) mouth for a few seconds. So yeah, he could safely say he didn't care about her.

But her lack of self-awareness was infuriating. She'd lost complete control of her head last night at the corner store when that cashier had hit on her. Like every other frustratingly pretty girl who didn't realize she was frustratingly pretty, she was ignorant to her own appeal and therefore was going to get herself in trouble at every turn because of it.

And he couldn't tolerate living with a girl as insipidly naïve as Sakura Haruno. Absolutely not. Picturing the parade of male suitors who would be showing up to his doorstep all because his idiot roommate didn't know how to shut a man down was a nightmare. Unacceptable.

One of Sasuke's more annoying personality traits was his physical inability not to look out for those around him. It was why he'd chosen a moron for a best friend; Sasuke functioned more as Naruto's babysitter than his buddy. It was a role he was comfortable with. It was also one of the (countless) reasons he'd never had a girlfriend before: Sasuke couldn't afford to invest all sorts of time and effort into somebody who couldn't be counted on to look out for themselves.

Sakura was going to be his roommate. They'd signed the lease, paid the security deposit. There was no backing out of this anymore, so he decided that things needed to change.

Namely, her annoying fucking naivete about men.

Was he overreacting to what had happened at the corner store? Maybe. The cashier was creepy but harmless, and Sakura had pulled out the old fib of "Sorrry I have a boyfriend" to turn him down. No harm, no foul.

He wasn't exactly sure why he'd reacted so negatively to the situation. It wasn't any of his business if she was flattered by the cashier's flirtatious remarks or not; he wasn't her boyfriend, her father, or even her friend. She could make her own choices.

But something inside him last night had been so very angry at the situation. Most likely, this irrational rage stemmed from his inability to tolerate too much idiocy at a time, and Sakura's ineffectual manner of handling herself more than counted as idiocy. If she was going to live with him for the next year, she'd need to shape up.

She was so annoyingly attractive. WHY did she have to be so pretty? If she wasn't pretty, then guys wouldn't come onto her. If guys didn't come onto her, he wouldn't need to pay so much attention to her all the time. And if he didn't need to pay so much attention to her all the time, she could be nothing more than a fixture in the apartment like a piece of furniture, instead of the thought-consuming aggravation she was already shaping up to be. And it was only day TWO.

He sighed and with all the reluctance in the world, gave the cold water tap a vicious twist.

In his defense, he'd fallen asleep twelve inches away from a girl who didn't seem to own a single pair of shorts that weren't fucking microscopic.

After Sasuke's shower, he towel-dried his hair, brushed his teeth, and wrapped a towel around his waist before heading back through the hallway to get changed in his bedroom. He needed to find a job today; classes would be starting soon, and this shitty-high rent wasn't going to pay itself.

He made a plan in his head as he walked to make some coffee, head downtown, start applying, and have his classes selected before dinner. It was a good plan.

At least, it started off that way, until he slammed into a damp, pink wall that came up to his clavicle.

It hurt like fucking hell, and when he went to investigate the source of the collision that nearly knocked him flat on his ass, he was furious to see Sakura, green eyes wide, a red mark on her forehead where she'd crashed into his chest. Her cheeks glowed fiery pink.

He opened his mouth to yell in her face when he realized why she was blushing.

He was shirtless. Completely undressed except for a towel slung haphazardly around his waist, that he now found himself gripping tightly like a lifeline, and Sakura?

Well, apparently they'd both gotten their showers at the same time. In bathrooms equidistant from their respective bedrooms. Because there she stood with a flimsy pink towel wrapped around her (perfect, dripping wet) body.

"PERVERT!" she screamed, at the same time he shouted, "IDIOT!"

Furious at her completely inaccurate insult, he leaned in closer and snapped, "What the hell do you think you're doing, you dingbat? Get some clothes on!"

Her green eyes absolutely flamed as she advanced on him as well, remarkably unfrightened of his towering temper, and she shot back, "EXCUSE ME?! That's EXACTLY what I was trying to do before you came barreling out into the hallway like some fat ogre oaf and ran into me! If you wanted to feel me up, you could've at least taken me to dinner first!"

Sasuke's jaw dropped.

"Feel you up? I'd rather be dead!"

As he said it, though, he knew it was a lie. If there was a way he could get his hands on Sakura Haruno, especially when she was like this, barely covered in a towel and wet from her shower with her pretty pink lips curled in a snarl, without her ever remembering it, he'd take it. She was maddening, but she was also fucking gorgeous.

"AS IF YOU'D BE SO LUCKY!" Sakura shrieked, apparently offended at his (untrue) claim that he didn't want to touch her. "NOT IN A MILLION YEARS COULD YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON MY GOODIES KEEP ON LOOKIN CUZ THEY STAY IN THE JAR!"

"Get your ass in your room and put some FUCKING clothes on," Sasuke snarled, trying to rein in his temper. He was torn between complete annoyance at her loud expository reactions to what was happening and frustrating arousal at the picture she made, like a tiny, angry sex goddess in that towel that kept SLIPPING down her shoulders.

Sakura, apparently, had had enough. She curled her tiny hand into a fist and, to his shock, actually took a swing at him. Pure reflex had him reaching out to grab her wrist before she could make contact.

That, obviously, was a mistake, because he'd gone and actually touched her, and was holding her smooth skin and thinking about how easy it would be to pull her in the rest of the way and show her all the good things that can happen when you shut the fuck up for five seconds, when…

"YOU GUYS ARE NASTY!"

They both whirled around to see Naruto, sleep-tousled and barely awake, staring at both of them with wide, offended eyes. And here, Sasuke realized his unfortunate position.

The scene was downright incriminating. Both he and Sakura were standing alone in the hallway together, wearing towels in equal states of undress, still damp from a shower. And apparently, it looked to the objective outsider, that that shower had been taking together, rather than simultaneously, in separate bathrooms. He also still had Sakura by the wrist and they were inches (INCHES!) away from one another.

Naruto was bound to misinterpret the scene. Hell, Sasuke knew anybody would.

SHIT.

"You couldn't even wait a week before you jumped each other!" whined Naruto. "Do you even know each other's sexual histories? Did you use protection? Are you on the pill, Sakura? Because as a college-age woman, it's important that you practice safe sex and…"

The one good thing about Naruto, Sasuke realized, was his ability to say things that were (inadvertently) a million times more offensive than the things Sasuke said intentionally. Sakura wrenched her slender wrist out of his grasp and spun around to face Naruto, her wet hair slapping Sasuke right across the face, and she snarled, "So help me God if you finish that sentence, I will pull your arm out of its socket and beat you to death with it."

The color promptly drained from Naruto's face, and he took a step backwards in retreat.

"Nothing happened," she snapped. "Ever. This creeptacula ran into the hallway and tried to grope me coming out of my shower, no big deal. I was just on my way to my bedroom to get changed so if you will both EXCUSE me!"

Sasuke couldn't articulate a response. His frustration with her, his disbelief at how she could misconstrue what had happened so completely, his anger at Naruto's stupidass assumption, all of it left him staring after her with his mouth opening and closing on its own as she stomped into her bedroom. The door slammed shut behind her.

Naruto seemed to regain his courage now that the dragon lady was safely in her own room; he turned to Sasuke with his eyebrows waggling.

"So, how was she?" he asked conspiratorially. "I bet she was go-"

Sasuke didn't trust himself not to strangle his best friend in that moment, and felt that it might be something he would regret years and years down the road. He decided he was just going to ignore him completely, and with all the dignity he had left (it wasn't much) he stormed into his own bedroom.

To her credit, Sakura seemed unable to hold onto a grudge for very long.

When Sasuke was done dressing and getting ready for the day, he found her in the kitchen brewing coffee in their never-before-used cappuccino maker.

"Want some?" she asked brightly, with no sign on her face that she was still upset over their accidental confrontation in the hallway, or that she even remembered it. She passed him a mug before he could answer, and he was immediately suspicious.

She poisoned it, he thought.

She giggled and poured herself some, too. "Oh relax, doofus. I didn't poison it or anything."

Mind-reading witch. Sasuke's eyes narrowed as he surveyed the rim of the cup for powder; there was no oily surface on the cappuccino itself that might hint at some type of poisonous addition, but Sakura was an idiot, but she wasn't stupid. She might have obtained some rare, colorless, odorless substance, and added it in.

Their eyes met, and he was struck by the expression on her face. It was impossibly alluring.

Almost…seductive.

His muscles tensed. What was she doing to him?

She seemed to collect herself, and blushed prettily before sipping hastily from her cup. Now that he'd seen her drink from it, he felt it was safe to taste his own.

"Thanks," he said slowly, cautiously.

"Sure," she replied. "So, I'm gonna try to find a job downtown today. I'll do some grocery shopping on my way back. Is there anything you wanted? I know I only eat boring vegetarian things so if you want something besides that, let me know."

Another suspicious act. Sakura, it seemed, could vacillate between extreme, ruthless anger and overwhelmingly sweet generosity. What a strange asshole.

"Just get whatever," he said blankly. "Uh. Tomatoes. I like tomatoes."

Sakura smiled sweetly and rubbed her fingers together in the international symbol of "If you want tomatoes, then you're going to give me money for them."

Okay. Maybe she wasn't overwhelmingly generous.

Maybe, he realized, as he forked over some cash to her waiting, greedy hands, she was just a money-grubbing, temperamental asshole who was way, WAY too pretty for her own good.

Whatever. She made good coffee.

Naruto headed back home that afternoon, resolving to return immediately and have Sakura cook for him, while playing Sasuke's videogames and sleeping on his couch. Under no set circumstances was he about to accompany his friend on something as horrifying as a job hunt.

Sasuke couldn't blame him.

But like hell was he going to let him come back, eat his food, play his games, use his couch, and take advantage of his roommate.

Rather, his roommate's cooking ability.

Whatever.

So he made his way alone through the streets of Konoha, looking for a place to make some cash that might be less annoying than other places to make some cash.

It was a good city, as far as he could tell. He and Sakura lived in a decent neighborhood; not a slum by any means, but certainly not as swanky as some of the places in Center City. Konoha was old, so it had the allure of a place with all the trappings of modern society, as well as quaint little coffee shops and playhouses that appealed to the hipster generation.

Sasuke wasn't a hipster, so he didn't give a shit. But it was still nice. Whatever.

It was hot, too. That was accelerating his search a little bit, because even if his apartment was shared with a pint-sized predator with stupid pink hair, it was also air-conditioned. His white button-down shirt was starting to cling to his back with sweat, and he doubted he was going to make a good first impression on anybody if he came in looking like he'd just run away from the cops.

He'd need to find something, and quickly.

A restaurant had a Now Hiring sign posted outside, but Sasuke knew he'd make a shit waiter. He had a harm time taking orders from anyone, let alone kissing any shithead customer's ass. He wouldn't last five minutes in an environment where what he was paid was directly proportional to how polite he was.

He passed it by with an irritated sigh.

A law firm down the street, eight blocks from his apartment, was looking for a receptionist. Sasuke rolled his eyes. Yeah right would he be somebody's fucking SECRETARY. He stalked by without even looking up.

A popular clothing store was hiring as well. But Sasuke pictured himself folding jeans and hanging shirts on hangers for eight hours a day and could blow his brains out just thinking about it.

It seemed hopeless. Sasuke was simply too proud for any of the jobs a normal college student took on. It was in his nature; as an Uchiha, he generally thought that he was better than most things. And why should an Uchiha reduce himself to taking orders from people who were beneath him?

Sasuke was aware that his ego was definitely going to get him knifed one day.

His rent, even when shared with Sakura, was pretty steep. And could he really count on her to pay her half on time, when it seemed she couldn't even be counted on to dress herself properly? No.

So the need to find a job that could work around his school schedule was predominant. Without the money, he'd be homeless. Or worse: Sakura would be able to claim their apartment for herself. And Sasuke could not tolerate the idea of Sakura living victoriously in the place they'd bought together. It made him sick to picture her smug face.

Desperation had him stalking into a grocery store a few blocks away from Shady Leaf Suites, with a Part-time Cashier Wanted sign hanging from the window. At least in a grocery store, there was air conditioning, not a whole lot of managers to answer to, and his coworkers would be in their own separate lanes, where he wouldn't have to talk to them.

He found a manager, a heavyset, cheerful-looking guy named C. Akimichi, and when he asked about the job, Mr. Akimichi shook his hand and gave it to him. No questions asked.

"What's your name, kid?" he asked. "When can you start?"

"Sasuke," Sasuke replied warily. Really? Just like that? "Sasuke Uchiha. Whenever."

"Excellent!" Mr. Akimichi replied happily. "We've been looking for someone under the age of 63 to work a checkout lane. You'd be surprised how backed up things can get when your youngest cashier is in her sixties and can't move the way she used to back in the 19th century, when she was born."

Sasuke smirked.

"So you look young. College?"

"Aa. Konoha. I start next week."

"Okay! Once you have your school schedule, come talk to me so we can work something out for you around it. We'll start you next weekend. Minimum wage to start; you don't look like an idiot, though, so you'll work your way up, sure enough."

"Hn. All right." He paused, not liking to say this next word too often in a day, but he figured it was necessary here. "Thanks."

"Sure thing, Uchihole!"

Sasuke didn't bother to correct him. He shook Mr. Akimichi's hand, sighed, and headed back into the sweltering summer heat.

Well, he'd found a job.

Sasuke Uchiha: grocery store cashier.

He rolled his eyes. Wouldn't his parents be proud.

Sasuke next headed down to the campus to schedule his classes. He was going into Finance, like his father before him, and met with an academic advisor to plan which courses he was going to take towards that major. It was a short trip, and he had 15 business credits scheduled across five mornings, Monday through Friday.

A brief foray into the campus bookstore, and at outrageous prices, he purchased all of his required textbooks.

He was left then to carry the heavy load back to his apartment. It wasn't that far from campus, but with the aching heat, it felt like a century. And he pondered, as he walked, about how sickeningly unfair it was that his tuition was covered for free, but he still had to pay for his books and apartment.

If you say free ride, he thought angrily, stalking inside Building C laden down with all of his books, then you should specify how that DOESN'T include a place to stay, or all the tools you need to actually get the fucking education.

All in all, though, it was a pretty successful day. He'd found a job, scheduled his classes, and bought all his textbooks and it wasn't even dinner time yet. With any luck, Sakura wouldn't be home from her job hunt/shopping excursion, and he could lay on Megacouch (what he called it in his head, since it was so big and glorious) and take a nap without any interruptions.

But when he unlocked the door and found Sakura in the kitchen, the radio blaring some shitty indie song he didn't care about while she sang along (and boy was this bitch fucking tone-deaf), he sighed and rolled his eyes. His good luck stream was coming to a screeching halt.

She was completely oblivious to his presence in the apartment. Her music was on too loud and she was cooking something again, something laden down with vegetables if the smell was any indication. In her short shorts and tank top and socks, she looked both beautiful and approachable.

And it fucking ANNOYED him.

She's so fucking naïve, he thought furiously, forbidding his eyes from traveling to her (perfect) ass and long, silky, tan legs. I could be a fucking robber, or a killer, or a rapist and she's too stupid to even know I'm here. IDIOT.

She clearly needed to be monitored at all times. Like most stupid children, she was frustratingly unable to look out for herself, and without his supervision, she was bound to take candy from a stranger, get into a van, and never be seen or heard from again. He exhaled sharply through his nose and stalked into the kitchen to give the naïve little harpy a piece of his mind, and touched her shoulder.

Here, Sasuke was forced to rethink his opinion of Sakura Haruno.

Because she whirled around in the span of three nanoseconds and punched him so hard in the jaw, his head jerked to the side and he was thrown up against the refrigerator.

"Sasuke!" she squealed, seeing who it was and clapping her hands over her mouth in horror. "Oh my God I'm so sorry, I thought you were a murderer! Why'd you sneak up on me like that? Are you okay?!"

Sasuke was too stunned to be properly furious with her. He rubbed his jaw (it was bruising rapidly beneath his hand) and stared at her with wide eyes like he'd never seen anything like her.

Maybe he was wrong about her.

Because if that (BITCHIN) left hook was any indication, Sakura Haruno could MORE than handle herself.

note.. Good evening, everybody! Hope you're having a nice, stress-free week! But to everyone in med school like me, I bet such a thing doesn't exist.

So I hope you like where this is going. I like the whole tortured-mutual-attraction thing, clearly. Please let me know what you think, especially if you favorite/alert this! This seems to be the story most people are most interested in right now of mine, so thanks for the support and hope you stick around!

Oh yes. About vegetarians eating eggs: I'm a vegetarian and I eat eggs. It's veganism where that's taboo. I think it's really in your personal scope what you consider meat and what you don't: in my personal scope, I don't eat beef or pork or chicken so I gotta get protein somehow! And eggs are perfect. Eat your eggs at midnight, lovies. You'll never regret midnight eggs.

xoxo Daisy