Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, nor do I own the song feature in this chapter. It is Gaeta's lament sung by Alessandro Juliani who just so happens to be the voice of L in the English dub. I'm not sure what it's from, but it is rather best version I have found on Youtube is L Lawliet singing extended song. I love it and listen to it constantly.
Search For The Sun
Chapter 4
Day 10
Dakota was standing in the pouring rain, allowing herself to be drenched in the cold water.
She had just returned from her mother's funeral.
Not many had been at the cemetery, but Aden and Dylan had joined her so she wouldn't feel alone.
She hadn't spoken to anyone since she got back, and when it started raining she walked out of the building.
The others had tried to get her to come back inside, but she wouldn't even look at them.
She just stood there staring at the darkened sky.
Aden had stood there with her for as long as possible, but he became too cold.
He seemed to be the only one who knew that this was her way of grieving and if the drug her back inside she would never let go.
Her clothes were completely soaked, and her fingertips and toes were beginning to feel numb.
She knew that was a bad sign, but found she couldn't care less.
Tears fell from her eyes and mixed with the seemingly endless rain.
She felt as though her heart was being ripped apart from the inside.
She was remembering all the happy times she spent with her mother.
All the sweets they would make, and the animals Dakota always seemed to be bringing home.
Her body shook, but not from the cold.
She was lightly talking to herself, but no one could understand what she was saying.
She was just mumbling quietly.
"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you," She whispered to the wind. She knew wherever her mother was, she was listening. "I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye."
A sob escaped her lips as her legs collapsed from under her.
She fell onto her hands and knees, sobbing violently.
She punched the ground with all her strength, and kept doing so until she split the skin on her knuckles.
The blood mixed with rain and dripped to the already muddy ground.
She let out a bloodcurdling scream that startled everyone inside.
No one had ever seen anybody break down like this, and that was saying a lot seeing as everyone at the orphanage had lost their parents.
Aden was the only one would understood, seeing as he had lost his mother as well.
He knew Dakota hadn't been ready for that, she wasn't ready to be alone.
She had still been a child inside, who looked forward to seeing their mother everyday.
He knew the green eyed teenager needed time before she could become calm again.
She was going to mourn until she wasn't sad any longer.
She was hurting, and had no one to take care of her.
He watched her punch the ground until she bled.
He wanted to console her, but knew she needed to help herself this time.
She would never get over it if someone tried to comfort her.
She needed closure.
"I'm sorry," Dakota repeated over and over until her voice was strained and hoarse.
Her tears still ran as the sky blackened.
It was dark, probably midnight.
She had been standing out in the rain for hours.
She knew she was overreacting, but couldn't seem to make herself care.
She stood and moved her wet hair out her eyes.
Her tears hadn't stopped, but she felt as though her mind was numbing. "I thought the funeral was supposed to give closure not cause more pain. Mother's death wasn't right. It wasn't her time, I'm sure of it. I know she's in Heaven, but why did she have to die? I wasn't ready to let go yet. I miss her."
She looked back up to the sky.
She closed her eyes and let the water calm her.
She had always loved the smell of the rain.
It almost smelled as though it would remain pure and untouched for eternity, unlike the rest of the world.
She began to sing softly to herself.
"Alone she sleeps in the shirt of man,
With my three wishes clutched in her hand."
She gripped the material over her heart tightly.
"The first that she be spared the pain,
That comes from a darkened laughing rain."
She had to take a deep breath before continuing.
"When she finds love,
May it always stay true.
This I beg for the second wish I made too.
But wish no more,
My life you can take."
She wiped away her tears, and sat up.
"To have her please just one day wake.
To have her please just one day wake.
To have her please just one day wake."
Her voice was quiet and a little rough from crying, but still beautiful.
In the distance, beyond the clouds, was clear sky.
She knew that one day it wouldn't hurt as much anymore, but it was going to be awhile before that happened.
She wiped her tears away with her soaked sleeve and pulled her dripping wet hair into a ponytail.
Her fingers wrapped around the small gem hanging from the chain around her neck.
It provided her with a small amount of comfort, knowing that the necklace had once belonged to her beloved mother.
It wasn't the same as having her mother, but it gave her a connection with her past.
And while she wanted to forget the pain of losing her mother, she didn't want to forget the good memories and was glad to have something of hers.
She turned and walked back calmly into the building.
Everybody had gone to bed, and she was surprised to find Aden sitting against the wall his eyes closed.
She wasn't sure if her was asleep, so she sat next to him pulling her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them.
She leaned back against the wall waiting for him to either wake or notice her presence.
Aden's eyes opened reveling his bright gold eyes.
He blinked in surprised at the sight in front of him.
Dakota was watching him with her jade colored eyes, while sitting in a puddle of rain water.
He assumed she was waiting for him.
He grabbed a nearby towel and draped it over her shoulders.
She smiled tiredly and rested her head on his shoulder.
He tensed at first, not really sure how to respond, but them wrapped an arm around her shaking shoulders.
She instinctively snuggled into his warmth, shivering slightly.
"I miss her," She whispered so quietly he almost missed it.
Her expression was calm instead of pained like he expected.
He knew she had gotten her closure.
"I know," He said pulling her into his arms.
Her heavy eyes closed and she fell unconscious in his arms.
He smiled and lifted her off the ground carrying her to their room.
He found she was extremely light.
He laid her down in her bed, and lightly shook her shoulder.
Her sleepy eyes opened.
"You should shower and change," He handed her her old backpack.
She nodded and stumbled sleepily towards the bathroom.
She stepped in the shower, turning on the warm water.
She sighed contently as it warmed her freezing skin.
She gently ran soap over the cuts on the back of her hands, cleaning them.
The wounds burned as the warm water and soap washed away the bloody and dirt.
She rinsed the dirt out of her hair, before washing it.
When she was done she wrapped a towel around her petite body and changed into her pajamas.
She was wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of black shorts.
She carefully wrapped her knuckles, before existing the small bathroom.
When she walked back in the room to find Aden had lit the candles and was laying in his bed.
His breathing was even and his eyes were closed, so she assumed he had falling asleep.
She blew out several of the candles before leaving the room.
She wandered the halls until she found Bell's room.
She opened the door to find Bell sitting on her bed awake.
"Why aren't you asleep Bell?" Dakota asked entering the small girl's room.
Bell jumped out of bed and threw her arms around Dakota's waist burying her face in the older girl's stomach.
Tears stained Dakota's shirt as she soothed the young girl's hair.
"What is it?" She questioned kneeling beside the small girl.
She wasn't sure what she had done to make Bell cry yet again.
"I was worried about you!" She wailed hugging Dakota tighter.
"I'm fine now sweetie. Please forgive me for worrying you. I didn't mean to," Dakota lifted the little girl into her arms.
"You were so sad!" Bell exclaimed.
"I just miss my Mother," She mumbled carrying Bell to her bed.
She set her down on the covers.
"Your mother is happy. I'm sure of it. All good people go to heaven, and she wouldn't want you to worry about her," Bell told the older girl as she crawled underneath the covers.
"I know, I just need a little longer to get used to the ideal of her being gone," Dakota smiling at the fact Bell was doing everything to comfort her.
"But she's not!" Bell exclaimed.
"What do you mean?" Dakota questioned.
"She's not really gone. As long as you don't forget her she will always be with you," The little girl yawned tiredly.
"Thank you Bell," Dakota whispered seconds before Bell fell asleep. "Night Sweetie."
Dakota kissed the young girl's forehead, and switched off the light.
She began to wander the halls again, peeking in the room's of children she was fond of.
None were awake which didn't surprise her considering it was 2 am.
She wasn't sure when it had gotten so late, but continued to walk the halls anyway.
She found the darkened library and switched on a lamp.
It gave everything a nice glow to it similar to the candles in her own room.
The library was probably the biggest room excluding the dining room.
She searched the shelves for a book that she hadn't read already and was surprised to find a book on the detective L.
It was written about his first cases and would have been confusing to anyone but Dakota.
She wasn't sure why this book was in an orphanage, but was glad it was here to read.
She found the cases he had worked on interesting and was completely mesmerized by it.
She was a quick reader so if she tried she could have it finished before the other started to wake.
She didn't feel tired, though she should after such a long day.
Last time she slept, she woke up sweating and had woken up Aden with her screaming.
She felt bad considering Aden barely slept anyway.
On the nights he was awake they would play card games or talk, on the nights he was asleep she would read in the library or cook sweets for the children.
Her body was growing weak from the lack of rest, and she would fall often.
Dakota knew she had to get some sleep soon, or she would start passing out from exhaustion.
She also knew it would have to wait for tomorrow, because tonight would just bring nightmares.
Else Where
"That girl interests me," A teenage boy stated, eating a cupcake.
His unruly black hair hanging in his eyes.
"Well, she is very pretty, Master L" The older man by his side observed his smooth English accent easy to detect in his deep tone.
"No, Watari, that's not the reason," L defended taking a drink of his sugared tea, before adding a couple more cube of sugar. His face had a slightly embarrassed look on it due to the Watari's statement. He did consider the girl to be very pretty. "She seems to be incredibly intelligent."
"Yes, she seems to have matched your IQ score," Watari pondered.
"Her Mother died in that car accident didn't she?" The detective asked.
"Yes, the coffin had to be nailed shut due to extensive damage to the woman's face," The old man mentioned handing a ice cream cone to the L, "The funeral was today. It seems the girl didn't take it well."
"What do you mean?" L asked between bites of his ice cream.
"She stood in the rain for four hours, talking to herself. No one could convince her to come back inside, not even her roommate, Aden Silver," Watari stated.
"Aden, is that the boy who has been chosen?" The boy asked biting into a chocolate chip cookie.
"Yes, he is," The man replied.
"I think this girl would also make a good candidate," The boy smiled sweetly, albeit awkwardly as he finished his cookie.
"I believe so as well, but she just lost her Mother. I'm not so sure she could handle the stress," The man responded a worried look on his face.
"She has just as much if not more potential than Aden," L was saying his thoughts aloud again, "Besides I will call my contacts and make the transition as easy as possible for her."
"Do you plan on showing her your face?" The old man asked worry evident in his voice.
"I was considering it. It's only a two percent chance she's is an enemy, and a very low two percent at that. Maybe it would be good for me to meet the rest of my successors," He walked over to the window and watched as the rain poured from the sky.
It was the middle of the night, but his body was unaccustomed to sleep.
He knew he needed a certain amount of sleep if he didn't plan on dying, but he found it hard to fall asleep when he knew he would just have nightmares.
He wanted to meet this girl who seemed to be as troubled as himself.
She was incredibly intelligent, and would be considered incredibly beautiful if not for the apathetic look that seemed ever present in all her pictures.
She seemed to be wearing black, but he was sure she wasn't Gothic for she didn't wear as much eye makeup as most goths and her hair was her natural color instead of her dying it black.
He knew there was something special about her, for the bells got louder when he looked at her picture.