CHAPTER THREE: The Secret Life of the Anonymous Queen
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B/L-Loft-7:34 a.m.
(BO'S POV)
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Sighing into the pillow, I can't help the way my hand runs up the mattress where my wife should be. Sadly this isn't the first time I've found myself longing for her, even though she's just in the other room. Sometimes she can be right in front of me, and I still find myself feeling the same loneliness as if she was a million miles away. Lately she may well as be. She's there physically, emotionally is another story. I keep replaying the last seventeen months over and over again, and though I haven't been able to pin point the exact moment there was a change, I did narrow it to the month. It was just like a switch flipped and suddenly she wasn't so present anymore. Slowly, shred by shred I started losing her to-something.
I'm not even sure what.
We have moments, days, and hell even weeks where things are fine. They can even be borderline good, so long as nothing comes up. If the kids keep their misbehavior to a minimum and I don't bother disagreeing with her.
At first it so painful to watch our relationship slip into this point. So painful for her to be as dismissive as she has become. Lauren had never been the needy, overly emotional type. I knew that from the moment we met. She has always been so discipline and calculated-a perfectionist really. It was admirable, impressive, and often endearing. Sometimes it just made her cold. I knew it though. I knew when we started dating. I knew when we married. I knew it all. She softened so much with the kids, with marriage-at least for a while.
When things started to slip, it didn't bother me at all. I accepted it, much like how I accepted I was a monster all those years ago living day to day with no friends or family. I accepted the little changes and how I slipped into second place with her. Now though, something inside myself has changed. I'm not sure what, or when the last straw that broke the camels' back was place. All I know is it has. Honestly, I don't think I'll ever stop my feelings from getting hurt from her actions. The day that happens is the day that I know there really is no hope for us. For now though, I'm just tired.
So very, very tired.
My hand comes to rest on her pillow, the silky material slipping between my fingers effortlessly. Half smile working its way onto my face, the image of her hair between my fingers as she wakes coming to mind. It's amazing how you can be so angry-no I'm not angry, I'm-infuriated. Yeah, that's it. I'm infuriated. It's amazing how a person can be infuriated at someone and still miss them. How you can be absolutely infuriated at them, yet still a single memory can bring a smile to your face.
Guess absence really does make the heart grow fonder-or at least remind you that you still need them.
I force myself up, kicking the sheet off myself. 'Who needs sleep?' I pull my hair back up into a high and tight ponytail. I refuse to give her the satisfaction of knowing I couldn't sleep without her. I know she knows it, she knows it because I've told her a million times. Though considering she doesn't really remember our vows, I'm counting on her forgetting this.
Pushing myself from the bed as I grab my phone from the nightstand I make my way to the door. Glancing off to my left, both of their doors shut, but that doesn't stop the semi-muffled base-filled beats coming from their rooms. If I listen hard enough I can make out the lyrics-not that I want to. Sean into some heavy-metal rap mix that's the craze as of late. Dani into, I actually have no idea what to classify her music as. Shaking my head I walk up the hall, partially wondering if Lauren has left already.
Wouldn't be the first time she used work to avoid me.
To my surprise she hasn't. She's sitting at the kitchen counter, flipping through a red folder. 'Wonder who dropped that off.' I scoff to myself, looking over at the windows, the shades still seventy-five percent down. I guess she's having another migraine.
"Kids not going to school this morning?" I ask thorough a sneaky yawn, looking back at her.
"Thought they deserved a day of rest."
"Smart. After everything they went through." Unconsciously nodding pointlessly, she hasn't bothered looking up. "I saw you with Danni last night," Pausing, I take a seat on the couch. "It was very sweet."
"She is my daughter."
"I'm aware." Well we made it a whole thirty seconds before anyone got snarky, not the worst record considering last night. "What's this?" My eyes initially looking for the remote, but end up catching a small piece of notebook paper on the table.
"The list of people who are approved of being our—-counselor."
"Short list." I chuckle to myself, eyes running over the names.
"Well there is the security aspect of things. Not to mention not many people would jump at the idea of counseling their Queen and her wife."
"Why do you say it like that?" I glance up.
"Would you want to be the one to tell the Queen and her wife they have problems? Each observation and comment risking the chance of you getting tossed in the dungeon?"
"I wasn't aware you'd throw anyone other than me in the dungeon," My timid smile fading quickly as she finally looks up, face firmly fixed in a scowl. "One of them is on your board, and-Koari? Really?"
"She is an adviser with the clearance," She looks back up at me to notice I haven't stopped glaring. "I didn't make the list Bo."
"Lauren I'm trying to find someone to help save our marriage, not fill out the divorce papers for us. Hell, she'd hand deliver them too I'm sure. I mean after all her 'every desire is to please the Queen'." I can't help rolling my eyes as I toss the paper back on the table.
"Well in our case there is no divorce. When a Queen or King cannot successfully work things out with their partner one is often beheaded. Well not one, their partner. You know security reasons and all that." Leaning back into the couch I can't help the way my eyes narrow. Her often dry and off sense of humor making it hard to tell if this is her attempt at lightening the mood, or if she's finally jumped over the line of sanity. "So this counseling better work-for your sake."
"Are you serious?"
"No," She chuckles, closing the folder and looking to me again. "What, you're the only one who can make jokes?"
"Mine was funny,"
"So was mine." She smirks. "You should have seen your face."
"I remember you used to be so much nicer."
"I remember you use to be able to take a joke." The tension that's been threatening to reappear since the moment I laid eyes on her making itself known. Her smirk quickly fades as she stands up, grabbing her folder. Of course she needs to leave.
"Well we used to be a lot of things."
"I don't really care who you pick Bo, I don't think we need it but-."
"Thank you." I whisper, swallowing my pride once again. My words apparently a shock to her as she hesitates momentarily on the bottom step.
"For leaving?" She snorts.
"For doing this." Forcing myself to face her, she's holding the elevator open now. "It means that you think there's something worth saving."
"Of course there is Bo," She hesitates again, holding my gaze. "I just wasn't aware that we needed saving."
She removes her hand letting the doors shut, not allowing me to say anything. If I push all my anger and hurt aside, I think I can admit to myself she isn't being difficult. I think I can admit, she just really doesn't understand. I'm just not sure if admitting she doesn't understand hurts more than believing she's behaving this way just to be a bitch.
"Mother leave?" Sean's voice breaking me out of my thoughts.
"Yeah, she needs to try and repair things with this merger or something."
"Ha, she's like the Abe Lincoln of the Fae world. Or maybe Spartacus." He plops down on the couch opposite me, feet going up on the table. "I'ma go with Spartacus, more badass."
"You're special," I can't help laughing as I throw an arm pillow at him. "Careful though. I compared her job to the Pope's last night, nearly ate me alive."
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but-"
"Sean, I swear to God if you finish that sentience I will ground you till graduation. College graduation." My eyebrow raising. That smirk taking up half of his face letting me know exactly where he was going with that comment.
"Just saying,"
"Morning," I look over my shoulder, the sound of footsteps catching my attention. "Sleep okay?"
"Mm-hm." She nods, only half paying attention to me. "Mother still in bed?"
"She had to go to work."
"Then what was the point in keeping us home from school?" Her once unusually soft and maybe even hopeful tone replaced with her normal razor sharp edge.
I stare at her as she glares down at me. Looks not the only thing my daughter having inherited from myself. She is such a strong mixture of who I was coming into being a Fae, and who I was when I thought I was human. A mix beyond difficult most times, but one none the less I could easily identify with. I could easily relate to. Not to say I love my son any less, he is our first born. We had sacrificed so much to make sure he was born. He just tended to favor Lauren in so many ways, ways that I could never relate. Besides it's no secret to anyone he's a mama's boy, well-Lauren's mama's boy.
"What, you thought cause you cried like a baby last night the world would stop?"
"Sean." My voice raises, attention snapping to him. "Enough."
"Jesus ma!" He yells, throwing aside the pillow he had been holding in his lap. "Why are you always standing up for her?" He jumps up without warning. "Everyone wants to get on my ass cause I speak the truth? She isn't perfect!"
"What the hell?" I mutter to myself, getting up and walking to the start of the hall. "Don't walk away from me. Get back here."
"I'm sick and tired of you always taking her side and making excuses for her. I was kidnapped too. She says things ten times worse to me, did you know that? Tells me on a daily basis how I want to have sex with mother. How I'm stupid. So what, I say something that's actually true and I'm in trouble?"
"Sean," I call after him, but just like his mother he refuses to listen. My sole response from him is the slam of his door. Slowly I turn around, hands on my hips as I find Dani smirking to herself. "Is that true?"
"Oh come on," She huffs, smirk still firmly in place. "Calling my brother stupid isn't that big a deal. I didn't know he'd get so butt hurt."
"Not that."
"Oh," She chuckles, walking toward the kitchen. "Well see, about that."
"Danielle Isabeau Alreyna, wipe that smirk off your face." She spins around to face me, and for a second-I'm worried at what is about to happen next. Her features fixed into this scowl, nothing new there-but there is something different.
"Yeah. I told the 'spend-to-much-time-in-the-gym, brown-nosing, mommy's boy' that he had a complex on more than one occasion. And you know what Ma? I don't regret it and I'd tell him again if he was standing here." She laughs coldly. "You should be less worried with what I call him, and more worried about the fact he wants your wife."
"You will respect me when you speak to me." I reach out for her arm as she goes to walk around me.
"Why? No one else does." She looks into my eyes, smirking as she says it.
"Go to your room and we will discuss your punishment when your mother gets home."
"My mother is off trying caring about everyone, but us. She won't give a damn that I mouthed off to you." She laughs again, jerking her arm away from me. "After all she does it all the time."
"Dani," I stop unable to think of what I was going to say. I don't take a step back, but I feel like I should. I notice these slivers of green slipping into her eyes. "Do as I say, now."
I watch as she walks away, or maybe I rather say sway. There's a certain bounce to her step now. She always walked confidently, Lauren said she had my walk, but this was different. My hand taps my thigh, anger and nervousness coming to a collision.
"What the hell is happening around here?" I mutter to myself, looking around the loft.
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The Siren-10:27 a.m.
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"And what bitch?"
I can't help laughing to myself, sure I hadn't just heard what I thought I did. Dropping my bag down, stepping aside allowing the door to shut. I glance around, it's as packed as always. What is odd is the fact that despite all four rings were full, only one is surrounded by an audience. Making my way through the crowd, and array of distracted 'heys' and pats on the back.
"Dammit." I mutter to myself, climbing into the ring. "Hey." I let out softly, kneeling down beside his motionless body. Pulling off the head guard from Dominic or was it Daniel-something with a 'D'. "You okay?" I tap his cheek twice. "Can you open your eyes?"
"Hell no, that little bitch got knocked the hell out."
"Watch your mouth." I snap, glancing over my shoulder momentarily. I can deal with him soon, right now I have to get-D-something up. "Can you hear me?" I tap his cheek again, his eyes beginning to flutter open. "Can you hear me?" I repeat. It takes a second, but I get a nod. "Good, then explain what the hell you were doing?" I demand, concern lessening as I help him sit up.
"He was talking all kinds of-crap and I got tired of it."
"What did I tell you?" My brow raising as I move onto my feet before helping him up. "Control is-."
"Is more powerful than any amount of strength." He finishes, nodding as he staggers out of the ring. A group of his friends helping him down.
"Now you Niko," I turn my attention to him. "What did I tell you about staying in your age range?"
"Come on, boy is in my weight class."
"That boy is just that, a boy. He's sixteen and you're what now, nineteen?"
"Twenty."
"Four years you have on him." I walk the six steps over to him, sure to keep him at arm's length, but close enough that I can lower my voice. "I don't tolerate bullies. I've warned you twice before about pulling crap like this."
"So what, you gonna throw my ass out?" He challenges, looking down at me.
"I could," I nod, taking a step back. "Or you can fight me and we can say you're still only at two strikes."
"You want me to lose to you?" He forces a laugh. "I don't take dives."
"No." I shake my head, walking over to the corner opposite of him. "I just want you to fight me. Win or lose you can stay, if you want or you know where the door is." I pull off my hoodie, tossing it down to a few of the kids.
"Yeah, alright." He laughs.
"Then lose the gloves and pads." I wave my hand gesturing at him.
A half nod before doing as told. Niko wasn't a bad kid, he just wasn't a good one either. I saw a lot of myself in him, a lot of that anger I held onto for so long. He was probably the oldest of the 'kids' that came here, any others who aged out went on to be mentors. I wish he would mature enough to be one, I really think it would be good for him. Learn to connect with someone, know the responsibility of someone depending on him.
It did wonders for me.
Another thing he seemed to have in common with a younger me was the mentality. He was a straight brawler, didn't care if he was laying into someone or if someone was laying into him. I think he enjoyed dealing out the punishment just as much as he enjoyed taking it. The thing was I already went through that, though I tended to prefer taking the beating rather than giving it.
"Good thing you're a succubus." He laughs, walking toward me. "Three or two T-down rule?"
"We can do two," I throw a few lazy jabs as he does the same. "Would hate to completely destroy your credibility here."
Jab-jab-right hook. He dodges the basic combo throwing one of his own. We do this back and forth. I'm really not trying to land any blows, but he is and his lack of success is beginning to wear on his nerves. He starts throwing his punches harder and harder, not a single one landing. One thing I had perfected over the years was the art of proper footwork. Deal with twelve to eighteen year olds on a day in and day out basis, you either learn to adapt or be ran ragged.
I can literally see in his sweat drenched features irritation transition into anger. He throws a few wild punches, one clipping my forearm hard enough to cause it to drop. Even though I know it's coming, it does nothing to prepare me for the pain of his fist slamming into my jaw. I hit the floor with thud, blood slipping from my lips. It's a bit different getting hit by a young man than it is getting hit by a fourteen year old.
Forgot how much.
I push myself up onto all fours, shaking my head at the crowd as a few are ready to jump in. Even together they probably couldn't take him, but the sentiment is sweet. He walks over to me, looking down as if he's won. It's always pride. Tossing myself on my back, kicking the back of his knee hard enough that he collapses. The thud of his body hitting the floor far louder than mine, but then again he must have a hundred pounds on me.
"The fuck!" He yells, hands going to the back of his head as he sort of rocks back and forth. I guess his head hit the floor. Oops.
"Not nice being blindsided is it?" I smirk, wiping traces of blood from my mouth as I stare down at him.
He doesn't say anything, just sits up. His hand rubbing the back of his head for a minute before running over his little fauxhawk. I wasn't a huge fan of the style, but he just had the face and attitude of pull it off. His neck twisting side to side, earning a little pop before he pushes himself back to his feet.
"You know, you were kinda sexy before." He quickly steps toward me, now putting a little more effort into his footwork. "Knowing you can take a punch though," Several more jabs exchanged between us, a couple landing. "Just jumped up my list."
"My wife will be thrilled to hear that." I throw my leg out, kicking his thigh hard enough to make him stumble.
He tries to mimic me now, throwing several kicks. Five of seven missing me completely, and two which are easily deflected. Just like that I see his anger returning. I can't tell if it's that he's losing which is upsetting him, or if it's that he feels like he's failing. For me it was never the actual losing that I care about, it was the feeling of failure. I always felt I was failing someone. Kenzi. Lauren. Trick. Dyson. My parents. The list goes on and on.
Deflecting his attacks more than anything, I can hear the crowd beginning to laugh and make comments. It's not them that distracts me, but the fact I catch a glimpse of Iel standing off in the distance. Taking advantage of my lack of focus Niko lands two strong blows to my ribs causing me to stumble into the ropes. He throws another hit connecting right in my temple.
It's only on reaction that I kick backward, my heel slamming into the side of his knee. Throwing my elbow back into his face as he started stumbling down. I turn around, readying to throw a right hook, but he's already on his knees looking up at me confused. Taking a breath it takes me a second to realize that just beneath his confusion is fear.
It's been so long since I've seen that look.
"Alright, shows over." I clap my hands, looking out at the roaring crowd. "You came here to practice, not watch. Get to it." I wave them off, attention drifting back down to him. "You okay?"
"I'm straight."
"That makes one of us." I smile, trying to lighten the tension. "There's no shame in losing a friendly match."
"Who said it was friendly?"
"Who said it wasn't?" My eyebrow raises as he maneuvers himself back onto his ass.
"Never thought you could actually walk the walk," His head hangs forward, hand rubbing the back of his neck. I can't tell if he enunciates so much to make himself come across harder than he actually sounds, or if it's an attempt to hide his New York accent. It's less than I think he thinks it is, but it's unmistakable. "I thought you was all talk."
"Why? Because I'm the Queen's wife?" My jaw tightening on reflex.
"No," He snorts, shaking his head. "I got like hundred pounds and seven inches on you. Plus I'm a man."
"Yeah, well I'm sturdier than I look."
"Apparently." He laughs, stretching his legs out before looking up at me. "Why doesn't your wife ever come here? This would be like the perfect photo opp."
"This-is mine. It's not part of that life."
"Living double lives? That's cool."
"Not really." I extend my hand out, helping him to his feet. "If you just applied yourself, and learned a little control Niko, you could go far."
"What's your deal with control?" He snaps, defensive is his default mode. Mine too actually.
"You know Bruce Lee once said something to the effect that 'I don't fear the man who has practiced ten thousand kicks once, but the man who has practiced one kick ten thousand times'." He just stares down at me. "You do know Bruce Lee, right?"
"Yeah."
"Okay good, I'm not having the best day and I don't need to feel that old on top of everything else." I chuckle and earn a slight one from him. "You can have all the strength in the world, but it's pointless if you don't know how to use it."
"I know how to use it."
"No, you don't-and it's okay. I've been there, and I had to learn myself how deal with it. Eventually I found people who gave me the motivation to put the work in, but that was just by pure luck. You have a chance here to start now. It can be so much easier for you."
"You don't know shit about what it's like." He scoffs at me, starting to walk away.
"I know that life is hard in general, human or Fae. I know that it's even harder when you don't know who you are. Even more so when you don't know what you are." I hesitate, making sure he's listening. "My love for the longest time carried a death sentence. I was lost for years, always searching while hiding. It was only when I went against my instincts that I found my place in this world."
"It's not that simple."
"You think control is simple? Having control is harder than anything else in the world Niko. I'm a succubus, one who has been committed to the same woman for over twenty years never straying. I spent over ten years of my life running, it was a second nature to me."
"Yeah, well-you're a better person than me." He nods and it takes me a second to realize it's not a nod, but a gesture. Glancing behind myself I find Iel climbing into the ring, I look back to Niko but he's already gone.
"Lauren have you spying on me now?" I can't help the way I snap, turning back to him.
"Lauren has no idea where I am." He lifts his arms out form his sides, chuckling. "I have no idea where I am."
"A gym."
"Well-that I was able to figure out." He nods, looking around. "The Siren?"
"In honor of Hale." I admit, leaning against the ropes. What's the point in lying now, he's caught me. "Dyson was much more of the boxer type, but when I was trying to come up with a name this was the one that stuck."
"So you admit this is your place?"
"I never denied it, did I?" My eyes narrowing as I watch him pull off his polo.
"Spar with me."
"I'm good, thanks."
"I'll let you wear the pads." He smirks, but there's something serious underneath the small talk and smirks. "Show me what you're teaching the next generation." He laughs, and I can't tell if it's genuine or if he's just caught the way I was staring at him.
"How did you find me if Lauren didn't send you?" I push myself up from the ropes, entering this little dance of his.
"I saw you sneak out, I followed you."
"Why?" Lazy jab followed by another, neither landing.
"I was going to see if you wanted to grab lunch and then curiosity caught the better of me." His shin making contact with the side of my thigh.
"You're going to tell Lauren?"
"She doesn't know?"
"We both know you already know the answer to that." Lazy kick hitting his hip.
"Why hide this?"
"Me and my wife haven't been big on communication lately, if you haven't noticed." Deflecting right, left, right then a follow through kick. The force behind his blows only enough to cause my palms to sting, but nothing more. "Besides, somethings are just mine."
"Doesn't words like mine become meaningless in marriage?"
"How would you know?" My eyebrow raising, throwing a spinning kick. He jumps back, but smirks.
"You know this is dangerous."
"Sparing with you?" I laugh out.
"These kids."
"They're street kids, most homeless." He mimics me, throwing a spinning kick. I could jump back or even duck it, instead I bring my forearms up and absorb the hit. "I know what that's like. If I had, had some guidance then maybe I wouldn't have such a high body count and heavy conscience."
"Save some kids, save yourself?" He laughs, throwing a left hook I wasn't prepared for. I go stumbling into the ropes, holding myself up for a moment. My eyes finding Niko, he's standing there with a towel in hand. I know the look he has though, it's the same one Dyson used to get when I was 'in trouble'. Huh, maybe I am getting through to him.
"Not worried your Queen will be pissed about that?" I laugh, wiping the blood from my nose.
"I'm pretty sure by the time you get home to resume the docile housewife role, you'll have healed."
"What makes you think that?" Moving away from the ropes, we begin this dance again.
"Because I'm not stupid," His laugh cut off as he grabs my left hook pulling me into him. He doesn't remember I'm not left handed so he doesn't even question this, letting his body relax. Spinning into his body, my right elbow slamming just below his ribcage. He goes stumbling backward, but somehow stays up. "Nice." He laughs through labored breath. "You've been at this for at least a year." He nods, coming back at me. "Lauren's never had so much as an inkling, so you must have gotten rid the evidence somehow."
"And here I thought we were just keeping you around for your looks."
"What can I say," He throws a left hook, before moving away from me. Now putting distance between us. "I'm more than just a pretty face with an amazing body."
"Not my type." My eyebrow raising as he laughs, taking only a single step closer to me. "What?"
"Sorry, just funny hearing you say type." He quickly steps in, throws a few blocked punches before stepping back. "From what I remember beyond Dyson and Lauren, you didn't really mind who you had running through your bed."
"Watch yourself." Throwing a right kick he catches, quickly throwing a left follow through into his side. He goes tumbling into the ropes, I just stumble a few steps.
"Don't get mad at me cause' you had some bad judgment." He laughs, staring to move again. "Speaking of, you were wrong last night."
"I heard that a lot, which part do you think I was wrong in?"
"Well for one, you shouldn't have yelled at my Queen like that-in front of everyone."
"Why is it that everyone uses 'my' and not 'ours' when speaking to me?"
"Slip of tongue." He doesn't even bother trying to hide the fact he's lying. He throws a punch which I easily duck, hands hitting his chest as I push him back.
"And for two?"
"You should have woken The-Hunters, even though we got Dani and Sean back, something is coming."
"You don't know what they are capable of."
"And you do Bo?" He laughs, throwing a lazy kick.
"Yes, I dealt with them. Me and Lauren decided to kill all but six of them because of how dangerous they are."
"Don't remember this."
"You were away in Europe, we learned a lot while I dealt with my father."
"Actually-I think it was Lauren who did the dealing there." He laughs again. "From what I've heard." My left leg rising just enough to block his low swiping kick. Spinning back into him the opposite way, l bring my elbow right back into his stomach. Again he stumbles, but doesn't fall.
My mistake-pride.
Letting my guard drop, so when his shin slams into my side hard enough to send me to the ground, I'm not even sure what happened. Palms pressed into the floor, gasping for air as jumbled thoughts trying to pull themselves back into focus. When I look up I find Niko in Iel's face, pain having to take a backseat to my desire to keep things from spinning out of control.
"Go. Hit the showers." I order, pushing Niko back. "Now." He holds Iel's stare for a minute, looking down at me before he backs up.
"Think he's sweet on you." Iel laughs, leaning against my back.
"What are we doing?" I turn, taking a step back from him. He's luckily that's all I do.
"Sparing?"
"That's it?"
"Yeah, that's it." He nods, laughing as if I just told the funniest joke in the world.
"The can you answer something for me?" My eyebrow raising again. "Why are you trying to size me up?"
"I," He hesitates, laugh silenced as his smirk vanishes. "Take sparing very seriously."
"Well," I nod, not exactly sure what I'm accusing him of. "I take my time here very seriously, so why don't you go back to doing whatever it is you do all day."
"What I do?" His laugh returns, as he jumps out of the ring to get his shirt. "I spend my day serving my Queen." He pulls his shirt on, looking around the place one more time as if there will somehow be an addition. "Don't worry Bo, your secret is safe with me."
I'm so sure.
I stand still keeping my eyes on his back as he walks toward the exit, looking at every person he passes. I can't tell if he's looking for someone or just trying to remember their faces. Me and him have always been decently close, he's been with Kenzi for what feels like forever. Why do I feel the need to remind myself of that now? Why do I feel like he was lying to me? One thing for certain is I know he wasn't following me to get lunch. Now anything after that is fair game.
I climb through the ropes, jumping off. My legs the least sore after my little 'sparing' sessions. I can't help looking around, now on edge. Tons of kids all working out and laughing, several of the trainers scatted throughout. I catch a few waves from those who notice I'm looking. I just don't see what his point was. I don't see what the point in sparing was nor his version of small talk. Was he coming here for a reason other than me?
Shaking off the thought I walk into locker room, unintentional smirk forcing it's way onto my face as Hanna walks by with a wave. She loved walking around naked, then again I haven't met a nymph yet who favored clothes. I surprise even myself at the fact that I don't look, I mean after all she is two-hundred and thirty with a body of a twenty year old-there should be some points somewhere in there for me not looking.
"Hey." I pat Niko on the back, he's leaning over on the bench putting taking his shoes off.
"Yo." He shrugs off my touch. "Boyfriend gone?"
"That is so not my boyfriend," I laugh taking a seat next to him. "I'm married remember." I hold up my left hand, wiggling my ring finger.
"My mom was married, didn't stop her from having a boyfriend-or six too."
"Was?" I ask gently, tilting my head much to the way I do with my own kids.
"She's dead, along with my father and the six boyfriends." He looks over at me, chuckling coldly. "I didn't do it.
"Thought didn't cross my mind."
"It did, it does with everyone." He stands up dropping his pants. "My mother was a succubus too, didn't have the self-control you do. My father on the other hand wasn't, didn't take too kindly to orgies."
"Where have you been staying?"
"Around." He tosses his things into a locker.
"Why haven't you gone to the Thornwood-House?" I laugh at his look of confusion. "I know what around means Niko."
"Why do you do this?"
"I told you already." I stand up, arms folding. "I don't like my motives being questioned. I'm not trying to be a savior and I'm not trying to buy myself some kind of redemption. I want to help because I know what it's like to be so hopeless. The Thornwood-House gives you guys a place to sleep, and here? It gives you a place to kill time, learn skills and form bonds. You don't want any of that, then you can leave."
"Just like that, huh?" He glares down at me.
"Yeah," I nod. "I'm not going to beg you to let me help you, I have plenty of people who gratefully accept it." I don't bother waiting for him to respond, my patience with him beginning to wear. Maybe it's just my patience in general.
"Yo, Bo." He calls out forcing me to a stop, looking over my shoulder. "What I gotta do to be one of those mentors."
"Prove to me that you want to change."
"How do I do that?"
"That isn't my problem."
.
Holy Cross Hospital-1:46 p.m.
.
"Hey," I let out softly, carefully closing the door behind myself. "Looking good." Smile pulling at the corners of my mouth, as I take a seat next to the bed. "Kenz came in to visit you yesterday, huh?" I nod to myself. "It's been an eventful couple of days. Where to start?"
I lean back in the chair, resting my feet on the bars underneath the bed. It's amazing how you can be one of the most powerful people in the world and not be able to save someone you love. Doctors, human and Fae alike. Natural medicine and normal. Nothing could save him from this.
"Your niece and nephew got kidnapped, by Kimberly none the less. I guess we won't be needing to plan a wedding anytime soon. Don't worry though, they're back safe now. It was only a few hours, but it felt like an eternity." I shake my head, fingers idly fiddling with themselves. "Lauren-Lauren lost control a bit of herself last night. I can't lie, I did too. Everything bubbling beneath the surface just came overflowing and I couldn't stop it. I didn't want to honestly. We're supposed to see a marriage counselor, she agreed. And I know what you're thinking, I know you're trying not to laugh. I mean who would have thought me and therapy right? I just-I don't want to lose her and I don't know what else to do."
My attention drifts to my hands, tears filling my eyes. I'm so tired of crying, so tired of the tears. I hate it. I hate the feeling and the guilt and the anger. All of it. I hate that I hate crying. Blinking back the tears this time, something I've been perfecting as of late.
"Oh, you remember that boy Niko I was telling you about? Well I think we finally made a breakthrough today. I think he might really commit, honestly if he learns to commit himself I could see him on the guard. I mean I wouldn't be able to tell Lauren how I know him-though that ship might have sailed due to-." I hesitate, I always felt guilty mentioning Iel to him. "Just that ship might have sailed."
It was ridiculous to feel guilty mentioning Iel to him, I'm sure Kenz has a million times, but it was just this feeling in the pit of my stomach. It felt wrong. Despite my current-feelings toward Iel today he was family, but he wasn't Hale. It was kind of ridiculous considering I've spent so much more time with Iel than Hale, but-it was just different.
"On the side of good news, The Siren has an average of fifty kids a day. That's not including the mentors and staff. It's incredible, you should really see it. The Thornwood-House too, it houses a hundred as of right now. I'm thinking it needs to expand. There's just so many of them Hale, you wouldn't believe it. They're not all fae either, some are human. You wouldn't believe the stories. It's always the same one too, their parents that were claimed or owned being killed and they just left the kids to die. Lauren's trying so hard with the merger, but it's coming apart at the seams." I can't help the sigh that escapes. "Everything seems to be coming apart at the seams right now."
I wish he was really here, not like this. I think things would be different. Kenz would still be-something. I just find myself looking at her lately and there's just something missing, I think it's Hale. It's funny how you can meet someone and they just complete you, like two halves of a puzzle. When he-became like this she was so broken, but she came out of it. At least I had really thought she did, until lately.
I think he would have been a great uncle too. He just had a calming way about him that the kids would have loved. I think Dani would have been able to bond with him better. She bonds with Iel just fine, but with Iel it's like that aggressive uncle who is always teaching you how to get in trouble. With Hale, I just imagine him being fun-but a better role model.
I think he would have helped with Lauren too. I don't understand her need for these friends or branching out, whatever it is she's talking about. I think he would have been able to be that for her.
I just think he would have helped me take care of them all, not let me fail like I have.
My attention snaps toward the door, my eyes widening as I find Kenz staring at me.
"What the hell happened to you?" Her eyes widen, holding the door open.
"Nothing, don't worry about it."
"You look like you got hit by a truck."
"I said don't worry about it." I make a face, shaking my head.
"Okay-—what are you doing here?" She asks, almost accusing me of something as she slips into the room.
"What are you doing here? They said you came yesterday, you shouldn't be here again for another week at least."
"Since when is it a crime for me to visit Hale?"
"Since when is it a crime for me to do the same?" My eyebrow raises as we find ourselves just starting at one another. "Aren't you supposed to be with my children?"
"No, Lauren came home and told me that I'm taking them to dinner because you two have some appointment."
"Appointment?"
"Mm-hm, and you might want to check your phone Bo-Bo, because she was pretty pissed when she walked in."
"My wife is always pissed as of lately." I sigh, pulling my phone from my pocket. Fourteen missed calls; nine from Lauren, two from Sean and three from Markus.
"What are you doing here Bo?" she asks softly, but seriously pulling my attention back to her.
"I've never stopped visiting him. I took a break back when we stopped making family trips here, but I continued."
"Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"I-I don't know Kenz." I shrug, I really wasn't sure why I never told her. I guess it just never really came up, and this isn't exactly Friday night dinner talk.
"What's this appointment?" She asks, moving onto the edge of the bed. Her hands coming to rest on his foot.
"I'm pretty it's with our new marriage counselor, she must have decided one for us." I snort, so much for me picking.
"Be kind, rewind."
"There was a lot of issues that came up last night."
"You don't say." She rolls her eyes in true Kenz fashion.
"I told her that I wanted it or our marriage was done." I admit in a sigh, looking up to meet her stare. "She's been so-different lately."
"I repeat, you don't say."
"I've tried, so hard. So hard to make excuses, to ignore things and I just am at the point that I can't anymore. There's just nothing more I can do on my own. I need her to talk to me. I need her to see me. I need her-I just need her and that's why I can't give up."
"You know she loves you." She whispers, eyes focused on Hale's face. "I'm so pissed at her right now, but she really does love you Bo. She always has."
"I know that," my voice breaking at the lump in my throat. "I just wish she liked me too. Or appreciated me. Or respected me. Or remembered that I'm not some useless person. I wish she remembered that being her wife is more than this."
"For what it's worth, I don't think it has anything to do with you."
"What do you mean?"
"I think she's just changing." She shifts her attention back to me. "I've seen her a few times, just staring at her reflection. I didn't think anything of it until last night. Iel said something and considering I forced him to sleep on the couch I had plenty of time to think."
"And?"
"I don't know Bo," She gives me this sad shrug. "You're her wife, I'm just saying what I've seen. Maybe there's something wrong."
The feeling of my phone going off in my hand distracts me.
"It's Lauren, I gotta take this." I smile gently, getting up and walking out into the hall. It was better this way, let her have time alone with him. "Hello?"
(Are you alright? Where are you? Are you hurt?)
"I can't believe Iel." I snort to myself, leaning against the door.
(Iel? What the hell does he have to do with anything Bo? Are you alright? Tell me where you are and I'll send someone.)
"Wait-what are you talking about?"
(Koari had a vision of you fighting some-guy. I didn't get much beyond fight and you being hurt.)
"I'm alright Lauren," I can't help the way I look around, confused. I don't understand. "I already healed and everything."
(Who was it? Why did you sneak out? Who did you heal from?)
"I just wanted to go out, and I healed off of who I fought with."
(But you're okay?)
"Yes Lauren, I'm fine."
(You scared me half to death. I couldn't reach you, I was about to send out the trackers again. Why would you just disappear like that after what happened?)
"I think my phone got damaged. I haven't gotten anything until just a minute ago, they all came in at once." I lie, looking at one of the nurses who seems to be taking a high interest in my conversation. "I might have to pick up another."
(I don't care about the damn phone Bo, just you.)
"I know," I smile softly, letting my eyes fall to the ground. Despite being far from happy with her, it was nice to know she still cared this much. "I'm okay, it was only a scratch anyway."
(I love you so much, and the thought of something happening to you-)
"I love you too." My words a sigh, that was the problem, I love her so damn much.
(Listen, between being worried about you and flipping out about it-I'm pretty sure I put our children in a panic, I made a call. We have an appointment at five, I'll text you the address.)
"Thank you."
(I don't understand this. I don't understand your need for this, but if the past few hours have reaffirmed anything to me it's that I can't live without you.)
"Lauren." I can't help rolling my eyes, ignoring in the pain my heart.
(I can't. So if this is what you need, then I'll be there.)
"Thank you."
(Will I see you before the appointment?)
"No," I shake my head, attention once again being pulled to the nurse who looks like she's wanting to join the conversation. "I'm going to go get the phone and get something to eat."
(We could get something to eat.)
"Lauren, I just-between what happened, our fight and then my one with Dani this morning, I just need some time to myself." Actually I'd love nothing more than to go to lunch with you. I just need to find a way to heal, and find a phone. "Please understand."
(Okay. Maybe we can have dinner, after the appointment.)
"Yeah, sounds great babe."
(I'll see you soon then. I love you.)
"Love you too." Hanging up the phone and quickly shoving it in my pocket, my overly curious nurse walking into the room closest to her.
What is going on with people today?
I glance back at the door, I was perfectly content with hanging out with Hale until I got the nerve to head back home, but I think it's best to leave them be. It's been so hard for Kenz to get time away from Iel, at least enough to come and visit.
Sighing, hands buried in my pockets as I head for the elevator. I earn a few looks from people, but it's not exactly unexpected. One I look like a damn crash dummy and two, while the hospital wasn't solely Fae, there was quite the disproportion between us and humans.
Walking into the elevator I press one, the doors beginning to close until a hand slips through. The sound of the thud earning a little jump, my attention lost in my own thoughts. The doors pull open, a polite smile already on my face. Don't wanna scare the poor person getting in.
Until I see it's Koari.
"Just in the neighborhood?" I chuckle, glancing over at her.
"Here on the Queen's business."
"Which would be?"
"You Bo," She looks over at me, that cocky fucking smile that never seems to leave her face, all too present. "Are not the Queen."
"I'm really beginning to think I should make up with my father."
"Have you ever wondered what it would be like not to have to use someone in order to instill fear?" She looks away, the elevator doors opening. "Your wife, your father, and your grandfather." Stepping out, her hand holding open the door. "What it must be like to never work for your privileges."
"You didn't have a vision."
"Can you prove that?" Her eyebrow raises, and it takes every bit of control not to slap that smirk right off her face.
"You have something to ask me, then ask. You have something to say, then say it. Do not spy on me."
"My job, my sole purpose is to serve my Queen." She pulls her hand away, forcing me now to have to keep the doors from closing. "You living a second life could be very-hazardous to her."
"For someone who is supposed to have the gift of sight, how'd it take you so long to figure out what I've been doing?"
"Who says," Her smirk fades, eyes going dead as she holds my stare. "I only just found out?"
"I don't know what game you're playing at here Koari," I snap jogging the few steps to catch up with her. "But it needs to stop."
"I'm sorry ma'am," She looks at a group of passing doctors nodding toward us. "I don't believe I know what you're speaking of?"
"Ma'am?" I snort in disbelief, shaking my head slightly. "My wife isn't here, you don't need to pretend with me. Just tell me if this little charade of yours is to get close to Lauren, or is a power thing?"
"My every desire is to please my Queen," Oh how she loves to use that line. "No charade."
"Oh," I laugh, anger quickly rushing toward pissed. "I bet it is."
"In whatever ways she may need or desire."
"Cute." I laugh out, jaw tightening.
Well, if only I knew it was so easy to get confirmation.
Sure, I had suspected for quite some time now she wanted more from Lauren. It was too obvious. I wasn't a stranger to the way people fawned over her now. I even got pretty good at being able to tell the difference between the sexual and non-sexual fawning, but with Koari it was so hard to tell. Then with our growing problems it only made my suspicions deepen. Lauren, Iel and even Kenz always told me I was crazy, so there was this constant nagging I was just overly reading things, but now in this moment? I know without a shadow of a doubt, I've been right all along.
Now, if only that was my only problem with her.
"You can play whatever little games you like, but know this," I hesitate, letting a group of nurses pass us by before I lean in just a bit. "It has always and will always be me at her side."
"I," She smiles, leaning further into me and had I not been so angry I would have backed away. "See," Her fingertips run along the outline of my jaw. "Different." She laughs as I slap her hand away.
"I've survived a girlfriend in a pea-pod. A bat-shit crazy daughter of an Ancient Fae, and a Norman Bates level physco hybrid. Not to mention the various come and go staff throughout the years. I'm sorry to break it to you, but you're nothing special." This time it's my turn to smirk. "At the end of the day, it will always be me and Lauren together."
"We shall see." She laughs, taking a step back. "By the way ma'am," Her hand comes to rest on the side of my arm. "You're so very welcome for saving your children."
Bitch.
I watch as she walks away. She was like chameleon, only not in the awesome and envy worthy way. No, she was so good a switching between personalities. She could switch from the 'sweet' and loyal advisor with Lauren, to the cold bitch she just graced me with the presence of in a second. Though honestly this was the first time she ever took this much liberty.
I couldn't say exactly why I distrusted her so much, I mean beyond the obvious being a two faced bitch who wanted to ruin my marriage. It was just something about her, something ever since the first day I met her that was off putting.
.
AT&T Service Building-3:57 p.m.
.
"This is an unusual place to meet." Markus says from behind his aviators, leaning against his SUV that apparently he thinks it's okay to park sideways.
"I-injured my phone." I lift up my bag, giving it a little shake as I walk toward him.
"Don't bullshit me," His arms fall to his sides. "I've helped you out before, you never looked quite like this though."
"Yeah, I ran into an overzealous sparring partner."
"His name Dazeekiel?"
"Ah, so you do know him." I chuckle to myself, pulling open the backseat door of the car I 'commandeered' for the day. "You following me now too?" I toss in the bag, slamming the door shut before turning around to face him.
"Him."
"Him?"
"I thought it was a little odd he was following you."
"So the natural reaction was to follow him-following me?" I laugh, leaning against the car. "How do you know he was following me?"
"Because I watched him spot you, pretend he didn't and then turn around and follow you down to the garage. He got pretty close to you, I figured he was just trying to catch up, but he hung back letting you drive away before following."
"Why would you do this? Risk Lauren finding out you've lied to her?"
"Call it curiosity." He shrugs, tightening his jaw as he looks around. "Despite being of royal blood, I spent a lot of time on the streets of Somalia before finally making my way here. Before my family line was meaning something again. Different streets, but the same outcomes. I think it's great what you are doing for these kids." He shrugs. "Besides, Zeeki is a bitch. I hope he looks worse than you."
"You didn't follow him back?" I can't help laughing, sweet to macho in record timing.
"Your wife called."
"Ah. Duty first."
"Always." He straightens up, pulling his sunglasses off. "Take what you need."
I glance around, not a soul in sight. My hands going to his chest as I lean in, lips parting just enough to allow a healthy stream of chi. I didn't need to actually touch him at all, but it was just easier to explain if someone had happened to walk up. Eyes fluttering open as I push off of him. Body relaxing as I feel a rush of energy.
"Thank you." I smile, touching his arm gently earning myself a nod.
Markus wasn't my friend, he was Lauren's, and in being her friend he found a soft spot for me. I'm sure we could get along outside of pleasantries, but I understood Lauren's need to have a friend her own. I have Kenz. It was only fair. Besides he was a bit more my wife's personality than my own, must be a whole bloodline thing.
.
Sullivan Practice-4:59 p.m.
.
I look up from my unnecessary new phone, Markus' SUV pulling up. He gives me a little half salute as I pull open the backseat door. Lauren hanging up her phone and flashing me this uncertain smile. She mumbles something to him before taking my hand and stepping out.
"It's only Markus, I didn't think you'd mind him driving me."
"I don't." I shake my head, letting her hand fall from mine. "I'm just a little-."
"Nervous?" She sighs, taking my hand as we reach the main entrance. "Let me see you."
"I already healed." I smile softly, her other hand cupping my cheek.
"I just don't understand what happened."
"Just-something stupid." I can't help the way I tilt my head into her embrace.
"Are you sure-about this?" She asks with this sigh, I think she's scared.
"I am." I nod, half expecting this to turn into a fight.
Instead she pulls her hands away, before holding the door open for me. I can't help laughing to myself as we walk toward the staircase. I don't even remember how long it's been since I've seen her open her own door, let alone open it for someone else.
The staircase is unbelievably long, like whoever built this must have hated legs. It's ridiculous. I can't help chuckling as I glance back at her making this face and I know she's thinking the same exact thing. The building itself was ridiculous. It was narrow and not all that tall, just the two floors. The first simply two bathrooms, the staircase and a bit of room to stand at the glass windows, I guess if you were waiting for your ride. The second floor, a small waiting area and then a door which I'm assuming leads to the actual office.
"He's human."
"Hm?" I look back as her, ignoring my leg cramp.
"He's human, knows about Fae. Credentials are decently impressive."
"Oh, just decently?" I laugh, she doesn't.
"Great! You're here!"
We both turn toward the door, the bit too excited voice pulling our attention. He has one of those mellow, low voices so his sort of excitement sounds-odd to say the least. He steps back allowing us to enter. Well, it's just your stereotypical therapy office. A chair facing a couch and the walls plastered in bookshelves and two desks.
"Well as you know I'm Doctor Sullivan," He was an older, plump man with thick, black rimmed glasses. Snow white hair obviously thinning. His overly pale skin being amplified by the black, leather material of his chair that he seemed to sink into. "You two are both here which shows a willingness and a desire to save your marriage. This is the easiest, but none the less, first step in our journey." Lauren's eyebrow raised at the 'our' in his sentience. "So, who would like to begin?"
This shall definitely be interesting.