Yet another one. Wowza.

Ever heard of the shovel speech? It's really a Buffy thing. The friends of one of the people in a relationship find the other person in the relationship and tell them, "You be good to my friend, and if you ever hurt them, I will beat you over the head with a shovel." At least, that's the general gist of it. Sort of "If you hurt them, I will hurt you/maim you/kill you/destroy you/end you/beat you over the head with a shovel." That is the shovel speech.

And this is Rose giving it to Reinette. The two of them hate each other's guts with a passion in this story, so we'll see how that goes...

Disclaimer: NOT MY STUFF! Again, the characters are in the basement of my mind palace, and I will give them back once I am finished. Jeez! Why must I keep repeating myself?

Enjoy!

Age 14

The two blondes stared at each other with narrowed eyes.

"Poisson," Rose acknowledged the other girl.

"What do you want, Tyler?" Reinette asked, voice venomous. There was no need for false pretense when it was just them. They both knew exactly how the other felt about them. "You're wasting my free period. I don't know why you told Lauren to tell me to meet you here-"

"Her name's Laura."

"-and I honestly don't care. Say whatever you're going to say right now. Otherwise I'm leaving," Reinette finished, as though the other had never spoken.

Rose's nostrils flared. "All right. I'll try to make this brief." She stepped forward, staring into the other girl's pale eyes. "You may have John fooled, but I've got your number. You're a pompous bitch through and through, and I hate your guts just as much as you hate mine." Rose sighed. "However, John honestly cares about you. I'm not here to tell him how to live his life, or who to date. But I can tell you something." She leaned forward slightly, glaring at Reinette. "I swear to you, right now, that if you ever hurt my best friend, I will find you and I will make you wish you had never set your sights on him. I don't care how rich your family is. I don't care about how inferior I am. If you put my friend in any pain, you'll get in back tenfold."

"Are you threatening me?" Reinette asked, trying to sound unaffected. "Because I will tell John and-"

"It wasn't a threat, Reinette," Rose said, voice soft. "It was a promise."

And with that, she walked out of the room.

Reinette stared at the empty doorway, shocked and angry. She pulled out her phone, scrolled through her contacts, and found John's. She pressed Call and waited while the phone rang.

"Hello?"

His voice, smooth and warm, made Reinette falter. She knew John liked her. They were dating, after all. And, since they were dating, it only stood to reason that he should believe her above all else.

But even Reinette knew that Rose Tyler was the exception. John would never believe Reinette if she just said, "Rose was threatening me." He'd ask what she said, exactly. Rose's accusations about her being a bitch would be swept under the rug- everyone knew that Rose hated her, and they knew that Reinette hated her back, so that was nothing new- and the threats she'd made would probably flatter John, showing him just how much his friend cared about him. If Reinette lied and said that Rose had threatened her with bodily harm or something in hopes of ending the friendship between her boyfriend and the chav, he'd ask Rose what happened, and Rose would tell him the truth, and he'd believe Rose. That would cause a rift between him and Reinette.

There was really only one option.

"Hello, John," Reinette said sweetly.

"Oh, Reinette." His voice went a bit flustered. "Hi. Um, why are you calling?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go out on Saturday?" Reinette asked, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. "Maybe to the museum? We can see the new exhibit on French expressionism."

"Wonderful idea! I'd love to! Is eleven a good time?"

"Perfect. See you then?"

"Yeah, see you! Bye!"

"Goodbye."

Reinette hung up, clutching her phone tightly. John would never know about her conversation with Rose. It was the only way to ensure that she didn't lose him.

She wasn't finished with him yet. Not even close.

Rose walked down the hall to where John was standing, talking on his cell.

"...love to! Is eleven a good time?"

Rose waited for him to finish his conversation. When he hung up, promising that he'd see the other person on the line soon, she asked, "Who was that?"

John grinned dopily. "It was Reinette. She wanted to know if I would like to go to the museum on Saturday."

That was it? Rose wondered. She didn't even mention our conversation? "So you're going to the museum on Saturday?"

"At eleven, yeah," John replied. "But don't worry! We'll be done there before two, guaranteed. Plenty of time for me to get ready for you to come over at three. What movie do you want to watch this weekend?"

"Can we do the Princess Bride again?" Rose asked hopefully. If Reinette wasn't going to mention the conversation, then neither was she.

John grinned. "But of course."

As the two walked down the hall, both were feeling a bit odd. One had thought the other was about to say something else. The other had almost said that exact thing, but had changed his mind at the last second. The words they had thought of were so small. A simple three-word phrase, so innocent and innocuous, but so weighted at the same time.

And that phrase was, "As you wish."

End of Extra 4

I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT ENDING

BUT HOW FUCKING PERFECT WAS THAT ENDING

Seriously, if you've seen the Princess Bride, OH MY GOD YOU GET IT GOOD HOLY SHIT CHECK OUT MY EPIC FORESHADOWING

If you haven't watched the Princess Bride... two things. One: rethink your life choices. Two: watch the Princess Bride.

RFF! Tell me your thoughts.

The word of the day is ABLIGURITION! It literally means "spending an inconceivably large amount of money on food." Seriously. Look up "cool unknown words" and then click on the choice with the word "obsolete" in it. This word is right at the top of the "A" section. I really like this word!

Love ya! lulu