Ummmm… Hey. Life happened, and I kind of got bored of this, but I will finish it eventually, be it months, or years in the making. It will be done. Thanks for the two follows!

Man. the dash and equals thing looks soooo much better on Google Docs...

Ugh, finally, Paul thought as he cleared a hill. He'd gathered a few more surface ores, deforested the area near his shack, and harvested all the herbs to see. He had also dared to poke his head in a cave, before almost losing it to a slime. Not making that mistake again.

But now, it seemed a cave was blocking his path. He sighed, and slowly advanced. Sword in one hand, and a torch in the other. He was just close enough so that the torchlight was beginning to enter the cave, and another despicable slime jumped out. Thankfully, it didn't seem to be interested in him, and it harmlessly hopped around him. Paul relaxed, and walked forward more at ease, and before he knew it, he was twenty feet in the cave with three torches behind him. Oh, and a chest in front of him.

He crouched down to it and slowly opened the chest, revealing an aglet, some potions, a few throwing knives, and some coins. Further inspection found the potions to be hunter potions, so Paul gulped one down just to be safe. He put the aglet on too, but it didn't seem to do anything.

"Oh well." He said aloud to himself, and continued. The dirt walls around him soon gave way to stone, and a rather large drop. However, sounds of water echoed up from the bottom, giving hope of a non-lethal fall. There was no other way down, and Paul didn't have anything to move around it.

IhateyouTerrariaIhateyouTerrariaIbloodyhateyouTerr- ChOOOfffssss.

Bloody cold. Paul lamented to himself, shaking his hair around to dry it. His clothes were a different story though. They would need some serious dry cleaning. He took off his shirt, revealing only his undershirt, and a still really cold Paul. He crawled away from the pool he had landed in, and threw a torch across from him. It landed... at the foot of a door?

Paul slowly approached the door, filled with awe and reverence, but suddenly replaced with disgust. Who would leave such a house in this horrific condition? There were holes everywhere, and it seemed the door was the only solid piece in the death trap on stilts. He creeped into the house (Using the word "house" vaguely), minding the holes, and found a small room before finding there were stairs. There was a pretty chandelier though, so Paul took that.

On the second floor, Paul found a piano, loom, another chandelier, which he looted, but in the middle sat a proud gold chest. He approached it as if it were an altar, and opened it. Inside, he pulled out a glowing boomerang, not bad, a gold coin. Great! And something else at the bottom. It was smaller, just larger than his handspan, and it was at the dead bottom of the chest. Paul stuck his hand in and pulled it out.

He looked at the strange, blue circle before realising his mistake. "WAIT NONONONO-"

Brzzzzing!

He looked around the interior of his house and disgustedly threw the mirror to the ground. "Is something wrong, Paul?" The guide asked, "No." I lamented. "This world has a cruel sense of humor." I heard light snickering in the corner, and looked at our new arrival.

"What? Something funny?" I asked.

"No, just karma biting you back." She retorted. "The Guide said I can go now," She said with an annoyingly happy tone. "I can go now."

I looked at the Guide, and he nodded his confirmation. "Fine." I trudged over to the door, and shoved it hard, removing the logs I had placed there earlier. "You're not gonna last five minutes out there." I told her as she gleefully gathered her belongings. "It's obvious this is your first time in the Terraria." I explained, but my cries fell on deaf ears.

"Whatever!" She said, and waltzed out of my house. I grumbled something about girls and near-death situations and walked back inside. I quickly smelted the ore I had acquired, and once that was done, I fell down asleep, exhausted.

A review would be nice… Please… With a cherry on top… I'll work on chapter four :D