Good Intentions
Four
Warning: A bit AU, I believe. I haven't seen/ read all of Death Note, but for some reason I think Misa makes it through it all. Possibly I'm completely wrong.
The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.
Misa figured that this was a good way to die. With Light by her side, Ryuk slouching against the wall to her left, snickering and muttering something about how interesting humans were, and L, of all people, doing CPR.
It was useless, she recognized, since this was all part of his plan. After all, it was written in his Death Note that she was to die and Misa of all people knew that what was written couldn't be altered.
But as she coughed and sputtered, choking on her own blood and feeling the sharp pain of Mello's bullet within her lung, Misa seriously wished it was different. She wasn't ready to die, she decided. Especially since she figured she would be stuck in purgatory for eternity. Or possibly, she hypothesized, maybe she wouldn't be anywhere. Perhaps an afterlife was forbidden for those who murdered using a shinigami's Death Note.
Misa knew Light didn't believe in Heaven or Hell, but she certainly did. Try as she might, she couldn't help but hope that Heaven would open its gates to her. After all, her use of the Death Note had been sparse before Light. She had just wanted to help him, a man who wanted a better world. How could that be wrong?
A tear leaked out as her eyes squeezed shut tightly when a wave of pain convulsed her body. Fresh blood rolled down her lips and she frowned mentally at the thought of how unattractive she must look right now to Light.
Light…
His eyes were hard and detached, cold, but undeniably intense as they gazed upon her impending death. They roved her body as her chest was racked with wet coughs. He wouldn't meet her eyes and Misa's heart clenched.
L had stopped compressions and was silent. She noted that, oddly enough, he was sitting up almost perfectly straight. His face was rigid, lips pulled tightly into a thin white line. The dark smudges beneath his eyes seemed even starker, if that were possible. Misa hadn't thought so before.
Misa wondered if L did have emotions. Previously he had shown no signs of having any, but now…
She wondered how many allies and friends he lost that made him so detached.
A shudder worked its way up her body and her vision dimmed, almost going completely black before returning.
She started crying again whenever the pain in her body started lessening; she knew that couldn't be a good sign.
A cool palm gripped hers and she was surprised when Light leaned down to kiss her on the forehead, brushing her bangs back in the process. When he pulled away she saw tears trailing down his face and Misa knew it was all an act. Before, with his cold eyes, that had been the real Light, the real Kira. But he had to be Light Yagami, the boy dating Misa Amane, and whenever someone's girlfriend dies, certainly they cry.
This made her tears leak faster.
She couldn't force herself to believe that he honestly loved her anymore. He might've loved her undying devotion and general servitude, but never actually her.
Her breath became stuttered and she cried out in her mind, wishing she could turn back time and refuse Light when he asked her for her death, telling her it was necessary. Misa knew though, that she could never refuse him.
Stomach heaving, she gagged as blood rushed up from her throat. L leaned towards her when the fit was over, resting cool fingers on her forearm, an offering of comfort she supposed.
Misa wanted to call out to Light, wanted to tell him she honestly loved him and always would. She looked at him, crying softly with dry and fresh blood caked onto her face and body, and saw something flicker in his eyes.
Before she could give it any thought her body convulsed and Misa Amane died.
End.