-1Ch. 4: Waking up alone
Usually when I awoke, I watched a thin, somewhat pretty redhead wake up next to a man with dark messy hair. They both slept on their own sides of the bed, usually with some small touch between, such as a hand on a back or a foot on a calf. The one connection was enough for that married couple, because in reality sleeping wrapped up in someone's arms was uncomfortable because you couldn't move around at all and you both got sweaty pretty fast. The wife told herself, "People only sleep like that in romance novels." and she said she was happy with her marriage.
But this was not every other morning, because this morning when I woke up the first thing I saw was white. My pillows, my sheets, the comforter on the bed, and the men's pajamas I was wearing were all white. The bedding on our bed is red; I stopped using white bedding and wearing white clothing in general years ago. Somehow I always managed to spill or drip something on them, and getting out the stains, particularly any blood stains, was near impossible even with magic. So there was absolutely no white in my bedroom--that was my first clue that something was going on.
As I lifted myself up on my elbows, I also noticed that I spent the night sleeping in the middle of the bed. This was also something that did not happen. Harry and I each our own sides of the bed, and while Harry was known to wander towards the middle some nights, I never crossed that line. Another thing was that I wore those sleeveless, v-neck sexy nightgowns that are a bit awkward at times because before I was sleeping with Harry I never slept in a dress, but that was he liked, so that's what I wore. The white pajamas I was in were so large that one of my shoulders was exposed with only the top two buttons of the shirt undone. The string on the bottoms had also loosed to the point where the top of the pants was halfway down my bottom.
I tried blinking multiple times, thinking it would wash the sleep from my mind and pull me out of this strange dream--but no, the blinks only made the white room appear about brighter. I lifted the comforter and sheet off me, and pulled up the pants, and began to tie the string tightly around my hips. When the string brushed against my left hip, I couldn't help but yelp out in pain. I gently pulled down on the side of the pants and looked to see a huge bruise.
That's when it all came rushing back to me. The missionary visit, the dinner, the…the…take a deep breath…the attempted raping. And then Draco Malfoy had saved me. He saved me? From what, my own husband? No, no, no…he saved me from the other man, the one that showed up after I married Harry.
My body froze at that realization. Holy Merlin, Harry! He would terrified and probably calling everyone. He would wake up with a throbbing head and blood on the floor and a missing wife. I pulled up the pants so that the top fell above my hips and below my waist. I had to get home to my husband. I had to let him know I was safe and let him hold me and reassure him that I was fine and just explain to him what had happened while he was gone. I had to get back to him, for the sake of my marriage.
I started walking towards the door, only for it to open on it's own. Wait, no, not entirely on it's own. It was opened by that house-elf. She carried a tray with scones , an apple, and another steaming cup of tea.
"Oh! Mistress is awake. Forgive me for my presence miss. Iris will just be leaving your breakfast in the room miss." The house-elf managed to bow while still holding up the tray, and then began to walk towards a small table in the room.
I found myself given an opportunity here. I had to get back to Malfoy, and I had to get back my robes before I could leave and go home. I took a few steps towards her and said, "Wait! Iris, is it?" she nodded a bit eagerly it seemed at simply being called by her name.
"Iris, did Malfoy tell you to bring me breakfast in my room?" I tilted my head and wondered in Malfoy had breakfast in his bedroom as well. Hell, I doubt Malfoy has ever even seen the inside of a kitchen other than mine. That thought made me widen my eyes a bit. I could not think of anything significant between Malfoy and me--our presence in each other's had to be momentary, and had to end very soon before I started to wonder more about Malfoy at all.
"Yes, miss. Master be having his breakfast in the garden, as he does every Saturday. He thought mistress would like her breakfast in her room." Iris spoke a bit slowly but enthusiastically
nonetheless. I got the impression that she wasn't often asked questions, only given orders.
I clapped my hands together and attempted a smile at Iris. I took a deep breath before saying, "Well, I would like to have my breakfast in the garden as well. But before I go out there, could you please bring me the robes I was wearing last night." Years with Hermione had gotten me in the habit of always being polite around house-elves, using their names and saying please and the like.
Iris' giant eyes seemed to water up very quickly. She moved the tray to one hand so she could bow more deeply as she explained, "Of course mistress!! Iris will have you robes in no time!" The house-elf then apparated out the room and came literally seconds later, with my robes cleaned, mended, and neatly folded.
She left for my to change in private, but as I reached for the clothes, I realized that there was an item missing. I gasped as I remembered what have become of my knickers. Poor, poor Harry, waking up in the horrible state and finding nothing of mine but my knickers. He probably already had the entire Ministry searching for me now--using every single member to find the wife of "The-Boy-Who-Conquered." It would probably only be a matter of time before Malfoy was owled, and I was set home straight away.
I felt very strange walking around fully dressed without knickers. While I will admit I never wore them to sleep, not wearing them during the day was an entirely different story. I knew of other girls who did it, but with the strangeness of it I could not get comfortable…I did my best to try to ignore my nakedness and remain as calm as possible. Once I was home I could put on some bloody knickers and be done with it.
After I was dressed, Iris returned and walked me down several long hallways, a library nearly the same size as the one at Hogwarts, and finally out towering French glass doors to a beautiful patio. Malfoy sat at the one table on the patio with his back to us, sipping a cup of tea and reading what appeared to be the latest addition of The Daily Prophet.
Past the patio there were stairs that lead down to nearly nothing but roses. Row upon row of sweet pale pink roses, with the smell of them overwhelming everything else, the smell of the tea and food and tension in the air.
I stood there smelling the roses in the air while Iris apparated away. I felt awkward standing there now, knowing that at one point I had done this exact same thing before. Standing within a few feet of Draco Malfoy, in these exact clothes, but now things had changed. Somehow he had wormed his way into my life, and now I had to worm my way out of his, and soon. If I don't show up in a few hours Harry will probably just have the ministry searching every house that has ever had a known Deatheater inside of it. All he would have to go on would be the blood stains and my pair of knickers. Bloody hell I have to get out of this world of rose gardens and house-elves and get back to reality.
"I see you've awoken Mrs. Potter." I was startled by his voice. I looked at him and saw that he hadn't changed anything at all, never glanced back once. He just sat there still sipping his tea and reading the paper.
I took a deep breath. I told myself that I just have to tell him I am leaving. I am leaving and he cannot keep me here. I needed to get out of there, out of there and back to my husband.
"Malfoy I'm leaving." He turned around at that. He looked at me with one eyebrow raised higher than the other for a second, then his grey eyes returned to usual lack of emotion. He folded his paper and placed it on the table, and then set his cup of tea next to it.
"Oh really, Ginevra? How exactly, were you planning on do that?" His signature smirk appeared on his face as he stared me down. I was, of course, a little infuriated at his condescending words towards me.
"I am going to apparate out, you bastard. I was just trying to polite and--" my hands began to involuntarily twist into fists at my sides as he interrupted me.
"There are no doubt hundreds of spells and enchantments on this manor, Weasley. It is a very long and tedious process for someone to be added for the convenience of apparating on and off the estate. Even after receiving my apparating license, it was still months before I was able to leave my own home." He smirked once again, and even went to take another sip of tea. I began to shake a little, stunned at the realization that he planned on keeping me here. I took a few steps towards him and looked down over him as I stood there irate and he sat smugly in his chair.
"You bloody bastard! I'll hex you and I'll walk out the front fuc--"
"--Do you have your wand Weasley?" He tilted his head to the side slightly and looked up at me with a touch of curiosity.
"What? What do you mean? Wh…what…what are you talking about?" I knew what he was getting at. I knew it and I didn't want to admit to. Not even to myself, let alone him.
"Surely," he gestured with his hands after he placed his cup back on the table, "if you had your wand on you, you would have hexed your husband last night. You would have hexed him as you now plan to hex me, and just walked out the front fuc--"
I slipped my hand in my pocket and felt the cool wood of my wand, but couldn't bring myself to wrap my fingers around it. He must have known that I had it the whole time. Had it the whole time and had done nothing. I interrupted him right where he had me.
"--He's not my husband." I said, closing my eyes, wondering how exactly I had gotten myself to this point. Where I had never spoken what was wrong with my marriage out loud or written it down or even considering telling any of my family or friends and now…
"What do you mean?" Malfoy's voice softened, and even with my eyes closed, I felt him lean in towards me, waiting to hear my explanation.
"He…he chang…it's not him. That's not my husband." I tried to say it defensively, but I knew that it came out weak and nonsensical. I could almost hear Malfoy's brow frowning and his eyes rolling.
"He…he becomes someone else. He isn't Harry. I did not marry that man. When he…when he changes, Harry isn't there anymore. Harry would never do that to me. Harry leaves and the other man is there. He--"
"--stop it. Just stop it right now." I finally opened my eyes to see that Malfoy had now stood up with the paper tucked under his arm and his now empty cup in one hand.
"Your husband beats you Ginevra. That's exactly what it is. You just can't admit to yourself or anyone else. Potter--"
"No you stop it!" I sudden felt moisture on my eyes and cheeks. Any other day of my life I would have looked up to see if it had suddenly started raining, but I knew that nothing was normal today, as I was apparently bearing my soul and bawling my eyes out as I discussed my martial difficulties with Draco Malfoy.
"That is NOT my husband! It's not him! It's not--" Draco interrupted my screaming ramblings by yelling back in my face.
"Is he possessed Weasley? Does he remember beating the shit out of you?" His voice was hard and the words came out almost cruel. The truth always is.
I felt myself plop down onto the patio in a heap of tears and mended robes. I tried to choke back a sob, hoping that I would by able to stop myself from speaking the next words that came into my head.
"He says he's sorry." The words came out in barely a whisper, and were then drowned out by loud sobs as I crossed my arms over my legs and buried my head. I couldn't stop. I had just admitted that I was a battered wife to myself, and the one person I never thought I would even have to speak again after Hogwarts.
My crying jag came to a halt when I felt light pressure on my shoulder. I lifted my head from my arms and saw between the tears that Draco was holding out a handkerchief for me.
I wiped the tears off of my face before attempting to blow my nose into a piece cloth that felt softer against my skin than most bed sheets.
"I don't work today, so we can go into town and order you some new robes for while you're staying here. There's…there's nothing in the paper about you or him. I doubt you'll want to contact anyone for a few days, until you decide on what your plans are." His voice came out soft and matter-of-factly over my head as he spoke.
Then I heard his footsteps walking away from me towards the French doors back into the house.
"You need to stop trying to escape reality Ginevra. It always finds you at the worst possible moment."
Just like the times before, he walked away, leaving me alone.