The Sunday dragged on, and Sandor couldn't find a place to put himself. He'd sat in every chair in his house, looked at every wall and picked up every magazine, tv channel and book in his flat. Nothing could settle the old dog's mind.
He shouldn't have put Sansa in that taxi, he should have held her longer, brought her inside and taken her home to look after. But he couldn't bring himself to have look into her pained blue eyes any longer, he couldn't carry on her trauma by trying to shield her from the fear she felt. The world is shit, this will do her good, he thought bitterly. Her naivety and innocence irked him, it made him want to protect her, wrap her in a blanket and not let her ever get hurt, but everyone has to be hurt.
He sighed and brushed his hand through his thick beard and laid on his leather sofa, not listening to the show on TV. He just stared at the celing and thought bitter thoughts about the world around him. He wanted life before the little bird, before he found this intense attraction to a girl who would never want him, a girl too pretty for a scarred man like himself. She was young, so full of life while he, while not even hitting his 30s yet, felt old and drained, only content with beer and swearing. The only thing that got him up everyday was The Brotherhood and his nightly beers with Beric, the man listened to him and understood him like his best friend Tormond, but Tormond was in the north working at the moment. Both he, Beric and Thoros were vets so they understood Clegane's displacement. A man doesn't give up years of his life to a cause and then happily plop back into the real world. Clegane struggled to sleep, full of past memories and the pills they gave him made him feel sick and numb. A nightly beer with Beric worked far better then every drug they gave him, and even then he was still a bitter old knew Sansa could never truly understand what that kind of torment does to a man, what pain really feels like.
He carried on staring at the ceiling, waiting for night so he could sleep and go back to work the next day. At least until his phone buzzed in his pocket. He angrily pulled it out, hating being disturbed. Until he read the words.
'Come to the brotherhood immediately.
-beric'
Sandor leaped to his feel, hastily pulling on his boots and hoodie before fleeing through his front door to Beric's aid.
He thundered through The Brotherhood's doors, expecting the worst but only found the great room lit, with a table placed in the center of the square, one of the hanging lights lighting the table sharply. People sat around the table, he first noticed Thor, the Guy, Gendry, Beric and finally Sansa, who sat at the far end, his eyes lingered on the little bird a little longer then they should have.
"What the f*ck is this!?" The Hound bellowed, angry at his obvious betrayal from Beric, who turned and smirked at him. Everyone stared at him, Gendry looked a little scared, Guy, Thor and Beric looked amused while Sansa had an unreadable emotion behind her hooded eyes.
"Poker night!" Beric chirped! Everyone grinned, even Sansa.
"Come to The Brotherhood immediately?" Sandor questioned, nostrils flared in anger. "Do you not get how f*cking worried I was you daft cock?"
"How else would I have gotten you to come?" Beric said casually, holding out a beer for his tall friend. Sandor knew his friend was right, he never took up Beric's invites so he would have had to of lied to get him to come. Sandor also knew if he was aware Sansa was there he would never of even toyed with the idea. He angrily took the beer, opening it with his teeth. "I saved you a seat."
Oh great, the seat across from the little bird, he huffed in his mind. He fell into his chair, seeing snacks, drinks and cards sat ready on the table, obviously awaiting his arrival. He noticed a light bruise on Sansa's shoulder, from her attack. She saw him looking and give him a quick smile, acknowledging the events of the night before.
"Now the grumpy one is here, let's start kids!" Guy happily cheered out, dealing out the cards.
"Have you ever played before Sansa?" Gendry asked, placing his hand caringly on her shoulder. Sandor didn't want to admit it made him a little angry.
"Ah-er yes." She spoke quietly. "My dad taught me." Sandor detected a lie but decided to not press her for the truth. With her words the game began.
Two hours later and Sansa sat surrounded by chips, her fellow players left to their scraps with egg on their face. She laid down her full house, the final nail in the coffin for her counterparts as they all gave her their final mouthfuls of money, shocked by the events that just unfolded. Sandor couldn't deny he was impressed, he'd watched her lie her way to victory and the valiant smile on her face amused him. She spent everyday with a polite poker face, so poker was her game.
"I need another beer." Beric muttered in a dull tone, glad they weren't playing for real money. Gendry and Guy watched her amused, drinking cheap whisky and joking among them. Young idiots Sandor thought to himself. He sat back in his chair, losing his chips early when he got mad at Gendry's shitty plays. He carefully watched the little bird joke with Guy and Gendry, enjoying how content she was. Beric passed The Hound a new beer, along with Thor who was still reeling from his defeat. Beric placed a new bottle of cola for the younger men to drink with her whisky.
"Would you like some whisky, milady?" Gendry said courteously, giving a fake bow. Sandoe had noticed she has stuck to lemonaid all night, turning down the offer of a beer numerous times. She blushed at Gendry.
"I-I don't think so." She, once again polite, turned him down.
"Come on girl!" Guy encouraged. "You can't be the only sober one here!" And soon the entire table descended on her to try some, even Sandor encouraged her, wanted her to live a little. She finally gave in, and took Gendry's glass to her lips and taking it to her mouth. Her reaction was swift and whimsical. She coughed a little and her face scrunched into an unhappy frown as she painfully swallowed.
"Like it?" Thor questioned. She quickly shook her head, taking her lemonade to wash down the taste.
"It tastes like paint!" She squeaked, causing a barrel of laughs for the men.
"Haven't you ever drank alcohol before Little Bird?" Sandor laughed, the men laughed too, each picking up on his nickname for her. She blushed mildly, embarrassed she will seem too young.
"Not really." The entire table lights up with excitement. "I like wine, but i've never tried anything else." She admitted.
"A barmaid that doesn't drink." Gendry laughed, swigging his whisky, now mixed with cola. "Fancy that?"
"Guy! Go grab the Rosé from my supply!" Beric instructed, Guy ran off to grab the drink. "Let's get this 'little bird' tipsy."
Another hour had passed and Sansa had indeed gotten tipsy from her wine. They were all sharing tales of past lovers and breakups, a conversation she and Sandor avoided entering. Beric spoke of a girl he loved when he was young, they rutted in a field and then he went to war, Thor spoke of his ex wife, who he never really loved, while Gendry spoke of his highschool girlfriend, he'd gotten drunk and lasted 10 seconds.
"I was 16." Guy admitted, nursing his beer. "Her name was Lia."
"Her? You're joking boy." Thor let out with a heavy laugh.
"This was before I found cock." Guy explained, Sansa giggled at his crudity. "Poor lass, I was utter shit." The tabled laughed at the man's tale of his first lover, everyone comfortable, even with the tension between Sandor and Sansa, their small glances heating up the room.
"What about you Hound?" Thor piped up, the table turning their attention to him. "Was your first time as bad as ours?"
"Fuck off." Sandor answered.
"Understood." Guy laughed the curse off. "What about you Stark? Does some poor boy have you in his memory?" He said cheekily. Sansa was shocked, no man had ever asked her such a personal question, no man had never asked her a sexual question ever. Both Gendry and Sandor's attention spiked, leaning closer to hear of her past encounters, both hiding the excitement it brought them to think of her that way.
"I-I...I'm a virgin." She admitted. The entire table fell silent, each man mouth agape. She was beautiful, seductive, from what they saw of her song the night before but had never had a man. Sandor couldn't believe it, he watched her intently, her innocence radiate from her rosy cheeks.
"You're bloody full of surprises girl." Beric finally laughed. "Still a virgin at 21." He laughed into his beer.
"Like you've never been with a man ever?" Guy questioned, unsure she was telling the truth.
"Nope." She said confidently, liquid courage going through her body. Sex made her giggle, in a childish way, she prided her innocence, it was once her only weapon. Guy carried on questioning, much to Sandor's anger.
"Like never had a romp in uni? Never touched a man all?" He fired questions at her, to drunk to realised the table were trying to signal him to reign it in.
"I mean I've... touched a man." She paused. "I just felt like I should wait you know?" She was embarrassed, sober Sansa would have stormed away by now.
"Marriage?" Gendry questioned suspiciously.
"No no no, for someone I really trusted." She explained, drinking more wine to boost her confidence. "I'm boring like that." She self mocked.
"Boring isn't the word I'd use." Sandor said outloud, the most words he'd spoken in a while, he swigged his beer while Sansa studied him carefully. He'd leaned in his chair, muscular body relaxed in tight blue jeans and in his white hoodie. She was more embarrassed of Sandor finding about her inexperience, she worried he'd think of her as a child, and not the woman she wanted to be. She didn't like to admit that she wanted to be wanted by the harsh man, as childish as that sounded. He was her savior.
"What a night eh?" Beric leaned in his chair. "Two surprised from Sansa and we found that guy probably ruined a poor girl's day" The table laughed once more.
The night had ended with the group on the stage, Sansa had been passed a guitar and then men surrounded her, Beric with his own guitar, Sandor a little further back the the others but still close and relaxed.
"Sing us a love song." Guy, obviously drunk, blurted out, laying on his back. Gendry and Beric agreed merrily, a mischievous glint in Beric's eye.
"Oh no!" Sansa laughed. "I don't write love songs." The Hound cocked a brow at her.
"Know 'Only Love'?" Beric suggested, a smirk on his lips aimed at Sandor. Only Love was the only love song Sandor liked, he enjoyed the tone. Beric was mocking him, Sandor guessed.
The pair discussed the key they would play in and began.
"Darling you're with me, always around me."
She sang softly, in time with Beric's strums.
"Darling I feel you, under my body."
She looked at Sandor with hooded eyes, he watched mouth agape as she sang the words he loved. Her soft voice formed perfectly into the words and he couldn't help but sway along.
"And I'll be yours to keep."
The words made his heart ache. He closed his sad eyes.
"Watch me fall apart, watch me fall apart."
He wanted her to sing to him, unaware she already was.
"Give me shelter, or show me heart."
His body relaxed even more, it would have fallen to the ground if not for his thick arm.
"Show me love love love."
Love was foreign to the both of them.
"And watch me fall apart, watch me fall apart."
The song ended with a small clap and the heat between the pair blazing. The thread that kept Sandor from looking her in the eye finally snapped and their eyes met, storms brewing within each other. As Sansa Stark sang his favourite love song, he quietly fell deeper towards loving her.
More songs were sung, merrier ones and sad ones, Beric sang, Sansa sang and Thor even pulled his musical chords out. Gendry and Guy, equally drunk were sent home at midnight, blowing kisses to Sansa and Guy sending some to Sandor who just grumbled at him. Beric and Thor, both giddy made their way to their apartment upstairs and once more Sansa and Sandor were left alone waiting for Taxis.
Summer was fleeting and a cold nip hit Sansa's bare arms. When Beric invited her to spend time with the boys she's not expected to be out for long so she had forgotten her jacket. She's enjoyed herself for the first time in forever. But the night ended with them awkwardly standing in the cold.
Without warning, The Hound's hoodie rested on her shoulders, filling her with warmth she needed. She instinctively wrapped it closer to her, silently inhaling his oak scent.
"Thank you." She said, looking up at his scarred face. "For yesterday, you were so brave."
He looked down and swallowed. "A dog doesn't need courage to scare off rats." He said, trying to dismiss her statement. He wasn't brave, he was a good liar.
She saw her taxi make it's way towards them, and instinct took her. She twirled on he tiptoes and planted a small peck on his rough lips, letting them only sit for a moment before returning to the ground, looking him happily in the eye. He stared in disbelief. She's kissed him. On the lips. His lips. His scarred lips.
She opened the taxi door, and with one last longing look she said 'Thank you anyway Sandor Clegane." And she entered her ride.
He once more watched her drive away, touching his tingling lips.
He then knew he was fucked.
